Heal You
by sidlelove
Summary: Sara and Catherine, two of them with deep wounds. What happens when they try to heal each other? C/S pairing...femslash, if its not your thing don't read...M for content and use of language
1. Chapter 1

**Heal You (Chapter1)  
**

**Ok new story...would take a while to develop these two from friends to more than that so hope you guys will like it and hang on with me throughout the story...and Catherine might be a little bit out of character in this chapter but i'll return her back to her normal self soon enough ;)**

**This is for you babe, mwah**

**Disclaimer: CSI characters are not mine, they are of CBS and all of them people (but Lily and Alan's mine *evil smile*)  
**

**ENJOY and drop in a review too**

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The beauty of the night was almost nauseating. Sara got out of her car and looked up to the starry sky and the crescent moon shining into the night. She sighed and put her hands in her pockets and let her mind float with the night. Just as she closed her eyes and took in a deep breath of fresh air, she heard a distant call of her name. She frowned and turned around to see Greg waving at her cheerfully. Sara managed to curve her lips to a soft smile while she waited for the younger man to pick up.

"You're early," Sara said to Greg who shrugged proudly.

"Came straight from my girl's place," Greg winked at Sara who nodded knowingly. "I don't smell bad do I?" He stepped into Sara's personal space making the brunette take a step back.

"No, you smell just fine," Sara patted on Greg's shoulders and headed towards the front door of the Las Vegas Crime Lab. "Do I want to know what you were doing up until now to smell bad?"

Greg gave her a searching look, pouted his lips slightly and shook his head. "The look on your face says that you don't want to know," Greg chuckled at the disgusted look on Sara's face.

"Great," Sara stepped into the building and let her headache come back to her. She rubbed her temples with one hand, catching Greg's attention. He raised his eyebrow in question at which Sara smiled weakly. "My head is killing me," Sara groaned painfully.

"How come you're at work?" Greg asked curiously. "You could have stayed home and gotten some rest,"

"Lily's mom is there, to get her stuff from my apartment," With the mention of the name Sara felt as if she was pushed into a pit of depression all over again. "I don't want to be there while she's there."

"Oh," Greg nodded to himself. "I'm sorry Sar. Anything I can do to help you?"

"Let's go get some of your coffee," Sara put an arm around Greg who smiled at her. "Might help a lot."

The two friends made their way to the break room in complete silent. In Greg's head he was dancing with the memories of the cherished moments he spent with her girlfriend moments ago and in Sara's head she was swimming through a never ending sea of loneliness. She hadn't felt that alone in so long that she had forgotten how much it hurt.

It has been almost a month since her girlfriend of three years, Lily Dawson died of lung cancer. Sara had met Lily at a club where she went with Greg and Nick to celebrate Nick's birthday. Even then Lily was diagnosed with the disease but to Sara's surprise she never let it get to her. She was the kind of person who liked to live life to the fullest until it was over. And to Greg and Nick's surprise that attitude was infectious. Within the first three months Sara became a whole different person though anyone who didn't hang out with her wouldn't have realized it. They were the perfect couple. After a long time Sara was happy, not moody at all and for the first time work was not her priority. Sara spent all the time she had in her hands with Lily, even when she became sicker and couldn't even move. And then she died, turning Sara back to the same person she was before. She buried herself in work, cut out all her social connections and forgot how to genuinely smile again.

From the people she worked with it was only Greg and Nick who knew of all the turmoil that was boiling inside Sara. They were sworn to secrecy by Sara that they would never speak of anything related to Lily to anyone else. And so they kept their promise.

Greg looked at Sara from the corner of her eyes and saw that she was in her daily haze, her eyes unfocused on anything, her lower lips trapped between her own teeth and her hands buried deep in the pockets of her pants. It hurt him to see her like that but nothing he, Nick nor anyone else did seemed to cheer her up. He sighed and stepped into the empty break room, heading straight to the coffee machine. Sara took a seat on one of the couches, took the outdated newspaper and covered her face behind it. Just when Greg poured two cups of coffee for him and Sara, Catherine walked into the room. Greg gave her a smile which surprisingly she didn't return. Thinking that she had had a bad night, Greg sat down next to Sara and handed her the cup of coffee which she took appreciatively.

There were three people in the room but it was still dead silent in there. Other than the noises made by the people passing by and the papers swaying with the soft movements, it was pin drop silence. Greg felt very uncomfortable. He wasn't used to it but he didn't dare talk so he kept sipping his coffee in silence. They had almost forty five minute until shift started. Greg's eyes roamed from outside the room to the blonde who had gotten a cup of coffee and sat down on the chair left to the couch he was sitting in. That was when he saw something odd in the picture. Catherine was hunched forward in her chair, holding her cup with both her hands and her hair was covering her face. But he clearly saw the teardrop that fell into her hand and the soft sniff that came from her didn't escape him.

Greg softly nudged Sara who gave him a glare which usually scared him but today he just ignored it. He pointed at the blonde who was silently weeping, rocking her body back and forth in her chair. He saw Sara's eyes grow wide and she exchanged a worried look with him.

"What's wrong with her?" She moved closer to him and whispered into his ear.

"How the hell am I supposed to know?" Greg whispered back. Both friends looked at Sara and back at each other again. "Shall we ask her?" He gave a scared, worried and curious look at Sara at which she nodded.

The brunette stood up and sat down in the chair next to Catherine and put an arm around the blonde. To both Greg's and Sara's surprise, Catherine shifted closer to Sara and rested her head on the brunette's shoulders. The soft weeps coming from her was clearly audible now. Greg quickly got up and squatted down in front of Catherine and took the coffee mug from her.

"What's wrong Cath?" Greg asked softly, taking both Catherine's hands into his. "Is everything ok with Linds?" That was the first thing that came to his mind which might make Catherine cry.

Catherine nodded onto Sara's shoulders who brushed the hair away from Catherine's face and put them behind her ear. The blonde's face was flushed and wet, and she was clearly biting her lips very hard.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Sara asked, rubbing the older woman's back. "Or is it personal?"

Catherine shook her head making Sara very confused. She couldn't understand whether Catherine was saying no to talking about it or whether to it being a personal matter. She took in a deep breath and placed a brave kiss on the blonde's forehead.

"Do you want to go home?" She asked taking a shot. Catherine nodded her head and pushed herself harder onto Sara. "Ok I'll take you home then." Sara patted on Catherine's back and turned to Greg who was still holding Catherine's hands. "I'm not coming back either ok? Can you take care of Grissom for me?" Sara asked Greg who stood up and nodded enthusiastically. "Thanks," She smiled at the younger man.

"Are you gonna be ok?" Greg asked both women curiously.

"Yeah," Catherine and Sara said in the same voice making the man even more scared. Clearly neither of them were ok and their words were not helping him feel any less worried about two of the very important people in his life.

Sara stood up and pulled Catherine off the chair and into her arms. The blonde was avoiding eye contact with both Sara and Greg while she wiped her face with the back of her hand.

"Why don't you get your stuff from the locker and I'll meet you up front ok?" Sara ran her hand over Catherine's hair. She nodded and hurried out of the room. Sara turned to Greg who was following the back of Catherine until she disappeared out of their sight.

"You can tell Grissom that I'm sick and that Cath had an emergency with Linds," Sara patted on Greg's back and headed out of the room. "That should keep him from asking any questions."

"Alright," Greg ran his hand through his hair. "Sara?" He called out, making the brunette stop at her tracks. "Are you sure you're going to be ok handling Cath?" He asked making Sara smile weakly.

"Don't worry," Sara sighed. "I'll just take her home, talk to her if she's up to it and get her to get some sleep. She should be ok then."

Greg just nodded. Sara turned around and headed to the front door making sure she wasn't caught by anyone of her team mates. She leaned on her car and closed her eyes, humming a soft tune under her breath. The cold wind of the night washed over her body sending chills up her spine. Her mind wandered to a place she felt so comfortable being in. In the arms of the one who still captured her heart. The long jet black hair, deep blue-grey eyes, ruby lips, the curvy body and the touch of her angel all washed over all her senses. An involuntary sigh escaped her lips as she hugged herself tightly; she didn't know whether it was to shield herself from the cold or just aching to be hugged by someone and to be told that everything was going to be alright again. That her shattered life would come back to be full again.

"Sara?" A husky voice made Sara open her eyes and drop her arms onto her sides. In front of her stood a very flushed, confused and embarrassed Catherine staring straight into her eyes. "Are you alright?" The blonde asked curiously.

"Yeah," Sara waved an arm in the air realizing how stupid that must have looked to Catherine. "Mind if we take my car?"

"No, I came by a cab anyway," Catherine shrugged. Deciding not to ask why she didn't come in her own car, Sara opened the passenger seat door for the blonde who jumped in like a little girl. It made Sara chuckle but she suppressed it not wanting to let Catherine get the wrong idea.

Sara hopped into her car and drove into the night with the silent blonde next to her. Catherine was staring out of her window, her eyes fixed on nothing in particular. They spent ten minutes in complete silence until Sara decided to put on some music. She put on the radio and started to skip through the channels, while her eyes glued on the road in front of her.

"_But every time the smallest thing goes wrong girl, you're out the door" _

From the corner of her eyes Sara saw Catherine turn her head towards her so she quickly changed the channel taking a hint.

"_There's much more to life than what you see, my friend of misery_"

Without even thinking twice, Sara switched to the next channel, cursing the irony of the situation.

"_You know time is long and life is short, begin to live while you still can." _

Sara rolled her eyes and skipped through a few channels before stopping again.

"_Hold me like you held on to life, when all fears came alive and entombed me,"_

The brunette moved her hand to change the channel but she felt a cold hand touch her palm making her freeze her actions.

"It's a nice song," Catherine said in a worn out tone of voice. "If you don't mind that is." She added with a genuine smile.

Sara smiled at the blonde and let the song play. She wasn't even listening to the song but some lines just caught her ear.

"_I'll be the thorns on every rose, you've been sent by hope. You'll grow cold,"_

Sara sighed and gripped onto the steering wheel tightly as she tried to keep her mind from wandering to places it shouldn't. She kept ignoring the loud noise filled in her car by concentrating on the road as much as she could. And then, she heard one of the most beautiful things she had heard in her life so far. Catherine singing.

"_Let me weep you this poem as Heaven's gates close, paint you my soul,"_ Sara couldn't help but feel slightly calm with that voice. It was husky and low but the tune was dead on. _"Scarred and alone, waiting for your kiss to take me back home."_ The words of the song seemed to have become serene all of a sudden making her body relax.

_"Hold me, like you held on to life, when all fears came alive and entombed me,"_ Catherine let out a soft sigh. Sara turned her head to see that the blonde was still staring out into the night through the passenger seat window. But she did catch a glimpse of Catherine's face from the side view mirror. The blonde looked hopeless and as if she didn't care even if she died then and there. Her lips were barely moving and the tremble of her lower lips didn't go unnoticed by Sara. _"Love me, like you love the sun, scorching the blood in my vampire heart." _And then Sara guessed what it was all about. Someone had broken the blonde's heart, badly.

Catherine kept humming the song softly until they reached their destination. Sara pulled in front of Catherine's house and turned off the car. Catherine just kept sitting until Sara got out of the car and opened the door for her. The blonde got out of the car and headed to her front door but stopped at her tracks. She turned around to see Sara standing at her car, watching every step she took.

"Do you want to come in for some coffee?" Catherine asked, deciding to be grateful for Sara's time. The brunette nodded and locked her car before following her into her house.

It was a beautiful house. Sara had been to Catherine's house just twice, one for the last Christmas party and once to baby sit Lindsey as a favor to Catherine. The place looked the same as she remembered; elegant, classy yet with a hint of cheerfulness brushed in every wall of the house. Catherine asked Sara to make herself comfortable in the living room and went into the kitchen to get coffee for the both of them.

Sara sat down on the comfortable couch and took off her jacket, letting it rest on the armrest of the couch. She looked around to see that the picture all around the house were changed, making it more up to date. Her attention was grabbed by one particular in which a very handsome man was holding Catherine from the back. The laugh on the blonde's face was almost infectious. Catherine looked cheerful and alive, the complete opposite from the person Sara had been seeing that night. Sara tore her eyes away from the picture and started to go through the magazines and books on the coffee table. She grabbed one of the books, Ruby Red by Linzi Glass and started to flip through the pages. Within seconds, she was interested in the book.

"Lindsey says that's a good book," Catherine announced her presence in the room making Sara sit up straight in the couch and close the book. "The first time I've seen her sit down and read a book without fighting for the tv." She added with a smirk. She handed Sara's mug and sat down on the couch next to the brunette.

"It's quite interesting," Sara said in a professional tone.

"Let me guess, you're a Speed Reader huh?" Catherine sipped some of her coffee making Sara blush slightly. "I'm not surprised."

"I'll take that as a compliment," Sara raised her mug slightly before taking a sip of the coffee.

And then the room got thrown into a deep sea awkward silence. Both women sat on the couch, slightly rocking their bodies and sipping their coffee. It looked as if both of them were lost in their own thoughts but in reality both of them were wondering what to say to each other.

"What's going on Cath?" Sara took the first step and asked softly. "You're not someone who gets emotional over small things."

Catherine turned her head to face the concerned eyes of her friend. But all she could do was smile.

"I understand if you don't want to talk about it," Sara shifted closer to the blonde and put her mug on the table. "But I have a feeling that whatever it is that happened is killing you inside. And it's better to talk to someone rather than keeping it bottled inside."

Catherine quickly turned away from Sara and concentrated hardly on the mug in her hands.

"I'm not saying it has to be me," Sara's voice became slightly defensive but the concern and care was still there. "Talk to someone you trust, vent it out and you'll feel better. Then you'll find it easier to cope with it too."

The blonde bit her lips slightly as she felt a lump grow in her throat and her vision started blur due to the tears accumulating in her eyes like no tomorrow.

"You should try to get some sleep now," Sara patted on Catherine's arm. "I'll see you next shift okay? Call me if you need anything." With that, the brunette grabbed her jacket and tried to leave but Catherine grabbed her by the wrist. It almost hurt Sara when the blonde's well manicured nails dug into her skin but she suppressed the urge to groan and turned to the blonde.

"Don't go," Catherine said softly. If it wasn't for the silence of the night, Sara wouldn't have heard her words.

Catherine had her whole body hunched forward. The mug in her hand was shaking so bad that there were several coffee stains on the carpet then. Sara quickly sat down on the coffee table, took the mug from her and took both Catherine's cold hands into hers.

"I don't want to be alone tonight," Catherine lifted her head to meet with Sara's eyes. Her whole face was red and tears were rolling down her cheeks like an endless waterfall. "Please." The plea in Catherine's voice almost scared Sara. She had never seen Catherine so vulnerable.

"I'm not going anywhere," Sara squeezed Catherine's hands. "I'm going to be right here ok?" Catherine nodded like a little girl. "Do you want to tell me what happened?" The blonde nodded again but she was finding it hard to talk at the moment. "Take your time, I'm not going anywhere." Sara shifted on the table so that she was sitting almost at the edge of the table. Catherine's knees were entrapped between Sara's legs and Sara's face was inches from Catherine's face.

"He left me," Catherine said biting her lips. It was clear that the blonde was trying not to burst out. But at the moment Sara was a bit more confused as to who the 'he' was. She had no idea that there was such a special person in Catherine's life who could have had such an impact on her life.

"I forgot, you don't even know Alan huh?" Catherine read the confused expression on Sara's face. Sara shrugged apologetically. "I haven't told anyone at work about him yet." Catherine bit her lips and looked straight into Sara's eyes. "He was my fiancé." She said softly and very quickly.

Sara just kept staring at Catherine. _When the hell did that happen? _She kept asking herself until someone inside her told her that the person who could answer that question was sitting in front of her.

"What? How come we didn't hear about this? You're getting married?" Sara poured half of all the questions she had for the blonde making Catherine squeeze her hands.

"I was going to tell you guys soon enough, he proposed just last week and it all happened so fast that I was just caught up with the rush," Catherine shrugged comfortably. "But now it's all over so there's no need for everyone to know that I WAS going to get married." Her lips quivered at which Sara's insides went awe.

"What happened?" Sara asked softly, pushing her body closer to the blonde's.

"He just took off, he didn't even tell me why," Tears started to roll down Catherine's eyes. "All he said was that he can't do it right now and that he just had to go. He didn't even have the decency to tell it to my face. He just left a note."

Sara felt a rush of anger run through her body. She got up and sat down on the couch next to Catherine and put an arm around the blonde's shoulder. Automatically the blonde pushed herself onto Sara and started to weep softly.

"I felt like I was in heaven during the last nine months," Catherine kept talking while Sara played lazily with the blonde's hair. "And just like that he left. No good bye, no explanations nothing. Just disappeared."

Out of nowhere, Sara kissed on top of Catherine's forehead making Catherine weep even harder. Sara gulped loudly wondering whether kissing her was such a good idea.

"It had been so long since I felt loved and cared for like that," Catherine hiccupped as she spoke. "It took me such a long time to let him into my life and when I finally felt comfortable in his arms he just goes away? How's that fair?" Catherine's voice rose in volume and pitch.

"I loved him so much. I did everything I could for him, anything he wanted," Catherine kept on talking in between her hiccups, her grip on Sara's hand tightened and the brunette felt her shirt getting more damp with every moving second. "How could he be so fucking selfish," Catherine made a fist and banged her hand on Sara's thighs hard, screaming slightly.

"OW," Sara jumped slightly but she made sure that she didn't let go of the blonde.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry I didn't mean to do that," Catherine quickly started to rub the spot she hit Sara. "I'm sorry."

"It's ok Cath," Sara took Catherine's hands and stopped her from rubbing her thigh. "It's understandable. You're angry, frustrated and agitated. I understand. So don't worry."

Catherine looked at Sara as if the brunette had gone crazy. Most probably because the blonde had never seen the brunette even try to comfort anyone about anything before. Sara just smiled and squeezed Catherine's hand and tugged on her shoulders.

"I know it's hurting you right now that he left you just like that," Sara said in a sympathetic yet friendly tone. "You are even blaming yourself for his departure. But you got to believe that it's not your fault that he left someone as incredibly wonderful as you ok?"

Catherine just kept staring at the brunette. _Who knew Sara knew how to talk like a friend? _She thought, smiling to herself.

"I know that you hate him for leaving you right now, and you want to find him from wherever he is and just slap him and ask him why he left you," Sara's eyes went unfocused. She was no longer looking at the brunette or anything else in particular for that matter. "You feel like without him you can't even take one step forward. Or learn to smile or trust again. And that you will never feel the same either."

Sara's grip on Catherine's hand tightened making Catherine slightly worried. But she just held onto Sara's hand, rubbing her thumb over the brunette's smooth skin.

"But someone told me once that that's never the case," Sara's eyes met with Catherine's again. Tears had accumulated in her deep brown eyes but Sara quickly blinked and acted as if nothing was wrong. "Just because you lose someone who meant everything to you doesn't mean that you will not find someone who is as special, as wonderful and as loving again." Sara's voice shook slightly but she just cleared her throat and kept on talking. "It's the rule of nature; you lose something and while you're trying to find it you find something else that makes you feel just the same as before. Sometimes even happier than before."

"You're a wonderful person Catherine, anyone would be lucky to have you," Sara smiled genuinely after a long time. For some reason that smile calmed Catherine. "Don't ever think that you're alone. You have Lindsey and we are always here. You know, your idiotic friends of yours whom you just wanna kill when we have alcohol washed over all our senses? We'll help you get through this." Sara's words made Catherine chuckle and sniff loudly. "I will help you." Sara made it more specific.

"It'll take time but what's hurting you now will make you stronger later," Sara shifted even closer to Catherine. "You can never forget him but that doesn't mean that you can't find someone who is better than him. You think you cannot feel the same but there will come someone who will make you feel like you're flying up in the clouds again. Just let time heal you, and I'll be right here through all that."

Catherine smiled at the brown eyes staring back at her, and the dry lips that were inches from her.

"You'll be just fine, I'll make sure of that," Sara ran her hand over Catherine's head messing up the blonde's hair. "Trust me ok?"

"Yeah," Catherine didn't even how but she somehow had taken refuge in Sara's words. The brunette pulled Catherine into her arms and placed a kiss on her cheeks. She wrapped her long arms around Catherine, making the blonde very confused. But she couldn't help but embrace her friend either. For some reason she trusted her. She didn't know why but she didn't care. She needed a friend right now and Sara was it

"You must be sleepy," Sara mumbled into Catherine's hair and let go of the blonde. "Do you want to go and get some rest?"

"You're leaving?" Catherine asked softly making Sara grin.

"Nah, I'll leave when you wake up after a good night's sleep," Sara said warmly making Catherine smile as well.

"Then can I stay here and do that?" Catherine asked. Sara frowned not understanding what she meant. "Can I just sleep here next to you?" Sara's face relaxed but she bit her lip anxiously making Catherine nervous. "Or I can go upstairs too. That would be better, yeah upstairs sounds good. Do you need a blanket or a pillow?" Catherine stood up to leave but Sara grabbed the blonde's hand.

"I don't mind you staying here," Sara said making the blonde sit down again. She took off her jacket and took off her shoes. "Plus I'm quite sleepy too." She smiled yawning loudly.

"Thanks," Catherine took off her shoes and stretched her body. "I don't think I want to sleep on that bed just yet."

"Yeah, that'll take time to get over but you will, don't worry," Sara laid horizontally on the couch, with her feet hanging over the armrest of the couch. "You're just going to sit or do you want to get some sleep sometime soon?" The brunette asked after she kept staring at the frozen blonde for a minute or two.

"Right, sorry," Catherine laid down next to the brunette who pushed her back against the backrest of the couch so that Catherine would be comfortable. Catherine laid with her back pressed against Sara's chest and her head resting on Sara's arm. Catherine closed her eyes and took a deep breath when Sara put an arm around her waist and when she felt Sara's breath on her neck. "Goodnight Sar."

"Hmmmmm…night," Sara sounded as if she was already asleep. Catherine didn't mind, since she herself was slowly drifting off to sleep.

There was a loud noise of glass shattering which made the two women on the couch open their eyes in alarm. Sara immediately closed her eyes and snuggled back comfortably. Catherine however lifted her upper body to check what caused the noise but instead she let out a stifled groan since her hair was pulled painfully. She looked down to see that her hair was caught under Sara's arm. She couldn't understand how she was sleeping facing to Sara when she clearly remembered falling asleep with her back to the brunette. Catherine's eyes roamed over the brunette laying next to her. Her hair was messed up, the top buttons of her shirt was undone and the skin on her chest was wrinkled (most probably Catherine's doing) and one of her legs was thrown over Catherine's hip locking the blonde in between her legs.

Catherine heard movement from the kitchen and she carefully brushed Sara's legs off of hers, making sure it didn't wake Sara up. When she was sure that the younger woman was still asleep, she hurried off the couch and to the kitchen. When she stepped into the kitchen she saw her daughter bent over a shattered mug. The younger Willows looked at her mom and shrugged with a sheepish smile.

"Morning mom, didn't mean to wake you and whoever that was," Lindsey said softly standing up.

"That's Sara," Catherine said shortly and bent down to pick up the rest of the mess her daughter had made.

"It is? Well I didn't see her face," Lindsey said simply grabbing another mug. Then she went silent while Catherine cleaned up the floor and turned around to face her. "I saw the note." She said softly, giving her mother a hurt look.

Lindsey had actually liked Alan. He was more like a friend than her mother's boyfriend to Lindsey. They used to have fun, watch movies together and even play video games. He was the one who encouraged Lindsey to read more and helped her deal with her never ending war with Math. She was actually hurt to come and see that the man she considered a friend would never be around anymore. But now that she saw her mother, she realized that her disappointment or pain was nothing compared to what her mother was feeling at the moment.

"I'm sorry honey," Catherine leaned on the table and rubbed her temples softly before turning back to her daughter. "I know you were close to him and…"

"Mom, it's not your fault," Lindsey said pouring herself some milk. "You can't help others turning into to complete jackasses."

"Language Lindsey," Catherine stated sternly but Lindsey just rolled her eyes.

"I'm fourteen mom, try to accept the fact that I'm not your little girl anymore," Lindsey said softly and headed to the door with her milk. But she stopped at her tracks when she saw Sara standing at the doorway. "Hey Sara, nice hair," She pointed at the messy hair of the brunette who quickly tried to straighten her hair, but instead just messed it up even more. "I'll be in my room until Stacey picks me up to go to her place." With that, the teenager left the kitchen, sipping her milk on her way.

Catherine leaned back on the chair and ran her hands through her hair before sighing out loudly. Sara leaned on the doorframe, feeling sympathetic towards the blonde who had to deal with everything at the same time.

"You ok?" Sara asked, clearly knowing the answer to the question. But she just had to ask.

"I will be," Catherine turned to Sara who didn't look assured at all. "You told me that didn't you?" She said with a cheeky grin.

"Oh yeah," Sara nodded with a smile and suppressed a yawn but Catherine caught it.

"Still sleepy?" Catherine asked at which Sara shrugged with a nod. "You should go home and get some more sleep before work."

"I can stay if you want to," Sara insisted genuinely but Catherine just shook her head with a smile.

"No it's really ok," Catherine smiled grabbing a mug. "I'm just going to take a bath and go back to sleep when Lindsey leaves to her friend's."

"Are you sure?" Sara asked curiously, not at all wanting to leave the blonde alone.

"Yes Sara, I'll be fine," Catherine said a bit sternly but still with a smile. "If I need anything I'll call you ok?"

"Great," Sara nodded and headed into the living room with Catherine following her closely. "I'll see you at work then." She grabbed her jacket and turned to Catherine. Without any notice Catherine wrapped her arms around the taller woman and rested her head on Sara's chest. It took Sara a minute to reciprocate and hug the blonde back.

"Thanks, for everything," Catherine let go of Sara and looked straight into her eyes. "I really appreciate it."

"Hey what are friends for?" Sara patted on Catherine's cheeks. "Call me if you need anything ok?" Catherine nodded convincingly. "I'll see you tonight." Sara bent down to place a kiss on Catherine's cheek and headed out.

Catherine stared at the direction Sara went until she saw the last of the brunette disappear out of her front door. For a reason she couldn't understand, Catherine wasn't as depressed or worried as before. She trusted Sara, her friend, to be there for her and to help her get through this.

_Who knew that one day Sara Sidle would comfort me about relationships? _She thought as she dropped onto the couch and closed her eyes. Even Catherine didn't realize it, but there was a soft smile curve on her lips as she dozed off into a light sleep.

TBC

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**Song credits:**

Song 1: Let's Work it Out by Raghav

Song 2: Friend of Misery by Metallica

Song 3: Bee Girl by Pearl Jam

Song4: Vampire Hearth by HIM**  
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**ok well thats the first chapter...****lemme no if its any good or not...il update soon again, and reviews always help make that process easier ;)...thanks for readin...ciao for now :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

**Thanks for the wonderful reviews...well i think i forgot to mention that this story isnt going to be too happy in the beginning, it's going to take a while for it to turn happy but it surely will, you can count on that and in the end the girls will be together, happily ever after too :D There are a few new characs in the story too, but thats just for fun...hope you all like it...lemme no what you think...once again thanks for the reviews**

**Disclaimer: Same as chapter 1**

**ENJOY n review pls...**

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"_It's a beautiful night isn't it?" She sounded as if it was even a burden to speak. All I could do was wrap my arms around her even tighter and hum in agreement._

_Not even an inch of her body was moving. We were sitting on the balcony of my apartment, my back against the railing and her back against my chest. The side of my face was pressed against the piece of clothing wrapped over her head. It was a cold night but a beautiful one. There were no clouds in the sky, stars decorating the sky marvelously, full moon shining brightly over the world and trees swaying with the wind singing a soft yet beautiful song. _

_All of a sudden she let out a soft whimper and grabbed her chest. Alarmed, I sat up slightly but she leaned back making sure I didn't move. _

"_Are you okay?" I asked, putting my hand over her hand which was clutching her chest. _

"_Yeah, it's nothing new," She took my hand and squeezed it. "Don't worry."_

"_But…" I tried to argue but she squeezed my hand again, with every ounce of energy left in her. And that shut me up. _

"_Forget worrying about me and tell me when you are going to go back to work," Her voice was still filled with mischief. _

"_I'm going to wait until you fell a bit better than now," I said softly and simply. She let out a snigger making my insides jolt. _

"_You know this is only going to get worse," Her soft voice calmed me beyond belief. "You're just finding an excuse to miss work." _

"_You know it's not that," I said defensively. I knew any humor in my voice had disappeared. The air around us tensed with the change of tone of my voice. _

"_Geez Sara I know," She said patting on my thighs softly. "I'm just messing with you. Don't get so serious over such little things."_

"_I'm sorry," The words escaped my lips softer than even a whisper. That was when she turned her upper body towards me and captured my lips with hers. Her kisses were always soft but the passion never lacked in any of it. Just when my hand touched the back of her head, with the need to deepen the kiss she pulled away and coughed painfully. I rubbed my hand on her chest until she recovered from her coughs and could breath normally again. _

"_I can't even kiss you straight anymore," She gulped down loudly and rested her head back on my chest. My grip on her tightened and I felt her shiver with the cold even when every inch of her body was covered by thick clothing. "I've become quite useless huh?" _

"_Shut up," I squeezed her small body in my arms. "I told you not to talk like that. Just try to get some sleep."_

_She laid in my arms silent for what seemed like an hour, both of us just feeling each other breathing. _

"_Sara?" She asked softly at which I hummed a yes. "Are you happy?" She asked softly. For the first time I heard pain in her voice. It scared me. _

"_Of course I am," I said quickly trying to see her face but it was buried deep in my chest. _

"_Good," She said even softly. "I've done something good before I go then."_

_Her words seemed to be piercing me but I still let her talk. _

"_Sara," She said taking a deep breath. "Don't cry ok?" Her plea made my heart ache but I couldn't reply to that. "Don't stay alone forever when I go. Don't think that you can't find someone who will make the way I made you feel. If you try to you will find that someone," She sounded so convinced. I didn't know from where she got that bravery. "And you never know. That person might make you feel even better than I ever made you feel."_

"_That's never going to happen," I finally said, my voice cracking. I felt her grip on me tighten. _

"_It will, and I will pray that you find that someone," She said with a mischievous giggle. "Don't you dare stop living when I go," She hit her fist on my shoulder softly. Her voice had no kind of mischievousness in it anymore. She was dead serious. "Whatever happens to me will happen, we both have come to terms with it. But honey please learn let go of it, to let go of me with time ok?"_

"_Babe…" But she cut me short. _

"_Let me finish," She said, trying to take a deep breath but failing to do so. "I know you are hiding a lot of grief just so that you can be strong for me. I need you to promise me that you will let go of that grief and learn to live without me. Promise? That you will take care of yourself and you will smile with my memories rather than shed tears. Because your smile is so intoxicating. Promise me you'll do that?" She looked up into my eyes. No tears, no fear, no pain, just plea. That was all I could see in her eyes. "Please?"_

"_Yeah," I nodded and tried to smile but failed miserably. _

"_Thank you," She placed a quick kiss on my lips before laying back on me. "But don't you ever replace me with some bimbo or else I'll never forgive you." She looked back at me, but with mischief filled in her eyes again. Now that was more like her. _

"_I promise I won't," I ran my thumb over her cold cheeks. "No one can replace you in my life, ever."_

"_Good," She licked her lips. "I love you my sweet thing." _

"_I love you so much too," I nodded, finally being able to smile. She kissed me again before laying back comfortably on me. And then I just sat with her barely moving in my arms. I held her close until I saw the sun break from the horizon and shine brightly over us. I took her hand and pulled her up. She didn't move. "Baby?" I asked after not speaking for such a long time. But she didn't say anything back. I shifted her light body in my arms. But she didn't move. And all I did was just hold her. _

"FUCK!" Sara sat up in her couch sweating badly. She buried her face in her hands, trying to steady her breaths. She didn't remember falling asleep or stripping off her clothes down to her pants and bra either. She wiped her face and headed straight to her room.

The room had never been the same now. She didn't even glance at the bed which was still unmade. She headed to her closet and opened the drawer in which rested one of her favorite books. But what she was looking for was the piece of paper sticking out from the corner of the book. She grabbed it, close the wardrobe door and leaned on it, opening the small piece of paper.

_Hey sweet thing,_

_Finally gone huh? You must be relieved. I'm sorry my love, for hurting you through all these years. For making you halt your life just for me. For keeping you in a dead end relationship. I'll never forgive myself for that but I hope someday you will. _

_I had never been scared to die. Ever since I found out that I have a death sentence hanging over me, I was challenging death to come get me. That was until I met you. You showed me how beautiful life can be in the arms of someone you love. All these years I spent with you were the only days I ever felt happy. Away from everything that ever scared me or hurt me, I felt alive for once. You gave me everything I ever wanted and anything I needed. I know that without you, that pain I felt during those last few days must have felt like hell. Frankly, I couldn't have taken it. You were the strength I needed to smile through one of the hardest days of my now over life. And for that and so much more I thank you. I was forever in debt while I was alive, and I will stay in your debt even in death. _

_I love you so much that sometimes it hurt to know that I won't be able to be with you for just a little more. I hope that the days we spent together will not become a burden for you. Try to smile anytime you remember me rather than cry. Do remember that I love you and only you. And hopefully I took my last breath in your arms; if so I died a happy woman. I hope I had the time to tell you to keep living your life, to try and be happy, to find someone who would make you happy and to keep smiling. Never hurt yourself, never neglect your feelings and always trust your instincts. As I have said a million times, they are your true strength. _

_Remember baby, if you need me all you have to do is close your eyes and I'll be right there with you. Just call out to me, I'm right there inside of you; never forget that. _

_Take care of yourself my love. I am sorry for ever hurting you and I am thankful for all you have ever done for me. I loved you with all my heart, I always will. Goodbye sweet thing. Hopefully we will meet again. _

_Lily_

Sara sighed heavily and folded the piece of paper. Her eyes darted to the bed in front of her making her lips quiver. She remembered that night as if it happened just last night. The night she laid the lifeless body of her girlfriend on her bed, staring at that calm face, kissing the cold lips and hugging her best friend good bye. She closed her eyes and gulped down the lump forming in her throat.

Quickly, she put the note back in the book, grabbed her shorts and hurried to the living room. She changed into her shorts, put on her running shoes, grabbed her iPod and headed out of her apartment. As soon as she stepped into the road, she started running. It was probably after 8 and with her neighborhood not being a busy neighborhood, there were few people in the streets. Her iPod was at full volume and her speed was increasing with every step she took. Soon enough she was sprinting into the park nearby. From there, she didn't know what happened but she sprinted through the park with every ounce of energy in her. All she wanted to hear was her iPod but in her head, all she could feel was the same she felt that night after she put Lily on the bed. How she sprinted out of her apartment, leaving the girl alone to run away from all the worries that were cornering her in a dark room. And she ran that night, not getting tired even after sprinting around in the park for hours, just as she wasn't getting tired right now.

And all of a sudden, she tripped over a piece of rock and fell onto the ground, rolling over in the grass. Her body came to a halt on her back and all she could do was breath as deeply as she could. She didn't want to get up. The cold grass felt good against her back and the fell of her thumping heart calmed her.

"AAAAAAAAAARGH!" She grabbed a fistful of grass and screamed into the night. She didn't care if someone heard her or not.

Sara didn't know how long she laid there, neither did she cared. But knowing that she had to get to work, she jumped onto her feet and brushed the dirt off her body. She saw that her knee was slightly scraped bur she was having no problem walking. So she put on her iPod again and walked slowly back to her apartment. She gulped down a water bottle before she headed into her room, took a short yet cold shower and headed straight to the lab.

Sara walked into the lab and headed straight to the locker room to put her change of clothes in her locker. Knowing that she was early, she laid on the bench in the locker room, deciding to rest her body for a while. She didn't realize how tired her body was until she stretched herself on the bench. She closed her eyes, bent one knee forward and let her mind rest.

"Sara?" A soft yet friendly voice called from the doorway making Sara lift her head up. There with a sweet smile stood Catherine, giving her a curious look.

"Hey," Sara sat up, putting on her fake smile she had gotten used to giving the world. "How are you?"

"I've been better," Catherine took off her jacket and put it in the locker before sitting down on the bench. "Are you ok? You look flushed, and very tired."

"I went running just before I came to work," Sara shrugged and wiped her face. "Coffee?" She asked making sure the subject didn't stay on her.

Catherine nodded and followed Sara to the break room where Warrick along sat, going through a case file. He smiled and greeted at both women before going back to the file again. After pouring themselves some coffee, both women sat down on the couch and let the silence take over them. But their time in serenity didn't last since Nick and Greg walked into the room talking loudly.

"I'm telling you, no one's going to believe you," Nick said in argument at which Greg frowned.

"Why not? What chick wouldn't want to get to a threesome with a dude whose as handsome as me? Really?" Greg lifted the collar of his jacket at which Nick laughed.

"One would be Sara, right?" Nick pointed at the brunette who almost choked on her coffee.

"I heard threesome, so I'm not going to come even near this conversation," She lifted a hand in surrender making Catherine chuckle. The blonde saw Greg and Nick turn her attention her making her shift in her seat.

"Don't look at me, I'm so out of your league," Catherine said proudly making Warrick and Sara laugh.

"We need more girls around here," Greg frowned at Nick who patted on his back and sat down on a chair nearby.

"And what makes you think they will agree with all the nonsense you blab?" Warrick asked heartily making the youngest CSI's pout even bigger.

"Come on guys, you can't say the thought of a threesome is not hot," Greg said to the whole room who for some reason didn't laugh. Instead they just smiled and looked behind him, straight at the doorway. With a slightly scared look, Greg turned around to see Grissom standing at the doorway with a frightened, shocked and confused look on his face.

"I don't even want to know what else you were talking about Greg," Grissom said to the younger man who grinned sheepishly. He then turned to the room, putting back his professional look. "Ok guys, we have work to do. But before that let me introduce some newbies who will be working with us for a while." He stepped from the doorway so that the CSIs could see the 3 very young men. They all looked confused, frightened yet ecstatic. Greg gave them the friendliest look while they looked at him like a madman, probably because of his little stunt earlier. "Marlon, Jerry and Noel," He pointed at the three boys each of whom raised their hands in greeting at which the whole room nodded.

"First, let's set each of you a supervisor shall we?" Grissom turned to the room. All of the CSIs looked at each other in anxiety since no one wanted a rookie under their watch. "Marlon you can go with Warrick," He pointed at the skinniest one of the bunch who was wearing a classy pair of glasses with his hair up to his shoulders. Warrick raised his hands at the boy who smiled weakly. "Jerry you work with Sara, the brunette there," Jerry was a slightly built boy with surprisingly handsome looks. Sara nodded at the boy who gave her a charming smile which slightly scared her. "And Noel you are with Nick," The remaining boy smiled at the Texan man who gave him a welcoming smile. Noel looked like your average teenager, tall with spiky blonde hair in the most carefree get up. He actually looked like Greg when he first started out.

"I don't get one?" Catherine said in a slightly relieved voice.

"You are already a supervisor Catherine," Grissom said going through the slips. "All these people are already under you. But if you need one that badly you can always take Greg although I was planning on taking him myself."

"No no, you keep him," Catherine said in a hurry.

"Ouch that hurt," Greg gave Catherine a pout at which Catherine tilted her head with 'awe'.

"Now now Greggo, you know I still love you," Catherine smiled softly at the young man who smiled smugly.

"Ok fun's over people, we have work to do," Grissom stepped forward and started to distribute the assignment. Soon enough everyone was exiting the break room with their partner. Since there were no cases for Catherine, Grissom decided that she could tag along with Sara and Jerry. Hence, Sara and Catherine stepped out of the room with Jerry following them closely.

"Your car?" Catherine asked with a knowing smile at which Sara nodded.

"Let me get something from my locker," Sara smiled and turned to Jerry who was giving both women a confused look. "I'll meet you two up front ok?" Jerry nodded and stepped forward but stopped and turned.

"Can I drive?" He asked in a low voice. Both women exchanged a mischievous grin and shook their head at each other.

"Oh honey, she always drives," Catherine patted on the boy's shoulders before leading the boy outside. Sara smiled and headed to the locker room to get her mints.

After what felt like hours, Sara stretched herself letting her spine crack loudly. They had been assigned a two storey house, which was quite bigger than it actually looked. Mother and daughter were killed, one in the living room and the other in the bedroom. While Catherine processed the overly large living room and guest room downstairs, Sara processed the rooms upstairs and Jerry collected evidence from all the remaining rooms downstairs. Sara's last room was the mother's bedroom which to her annoyance was quite big and spacey. She stepped out of the room and into the hallway.

"I'm done here," She called downstairs and saw Jerry come into view. "How many more rooms do you have?"

"I'm halfway through the kitchen. Then we are done," Jerry smiled at the brunette who nodded.

"I'm just wrapping up," Catherine's voice came muffled from the bedroom.

"Ok, I'll finish the bathroom and come downstairs then," Sara smiled and went back in the room. It took her no time to finish processing the bathroom since it was quite clean. She put all the evidence bags together and knelt down to arrange everything back in her kit. She took her finger print powder container and saw that it was almost empty.

"Damn, I'll have to remember to refill these," She said to herself before putting it back in its place.

"Will you be needing any help with that?" A voice came from the doorway making Sara reach for her gun. "Whoa whoa, easy girl."

Catherine slightly stepped back when she saw Sara reach for her gun. But when she saw that it was Catherine, the brunette calmed down and smiled.

"Did you forget that I was around?" Catherine asked tilting her head.

"Sorry, happens to me more often than you'd think," Sara smiled sheepishly and turned back to wrapping up her kit. Sara closed the kit and looked at Catherine who was looking around the room, probably admiring it. She caught Sara looking at her and grinned.

"This is a beautiful room huh?" Catherine sighed.

"Yeah, but a bitch to process," Sara stood up, with her kit in one hand while she picked up the evidence bags in the other. "But if I was to live in it, yes I wouldn't complain."

"Me neither," Catherine peeped her head into the bathroom and nodded admiringly. Sara couldn't help but seeing a hint of desire in the blonde's eyes which she couldn't really understand.

"You wanna go grab a bite after shift?" Sara asked, talking a bit quickly than she normally does. Catherine gave the brunette a questioning look. "We've worked together for a while but I don't think either of us had really taken an initiative to really know about each other." Sara continued to ramble making Catherine very amused. "And you know with all that has happened, I think we should you know, become friends, or something like that…but that's only if you want."

"Sara, we are already friends," Catherine said, shutting the brunette up. "But I would love to get to know you better and let you know me better." She gave her _friend_ a warm smile.

"Great," Sara said with a courteous nod.

Both women felt at ease with each other's presence. As if for some reason, their worries disappeared when they had each other nearby. They didn't even know each other that much, but the friendship between them was clearly stronger than what either of them could imagine.

"Ms. Sidle, I think I'm done down here," Jerry's voice came from downstairs making both women jump slightly.

"Yeah, ok," Sara called tightening her grip on her kit. "Will be down in a minute."

"Okay," Jerry's voice was slightly muffled but neither woman cared. Sara smiled at Catherine, letting a twinkle reach her eyes.

"You know Sara you should smile a bit more often," Catherine said heading to the door. "Not the fake ones you shoot at us all the time, but genuine 'Sidle smiles'." The blonde's words made Sara stop at her tracks. "Your smile is…I don't know…intoxicating."

And without saying another word, she stepped out of the door leaving Sara alone with shocked look. She didn't know that to think of what Catherine had just said. Those were the same words she had heard once before, and she heard it from just one person. She didn't know whether she wanted to feel shocked or happy. All she knew was that she was suddenly very confused.

"Are you coming Sara?" Catherine's voice brought Sara back from her thoughts, making her hurry down the stairs where Jerry stood admiring a picture frame which was on the table.

"Hello ladies," He smiled at Catherine and Sara both of whom smiled back at him. "Can't believe such a beautiful girl like this couldn't live to actually enjoy all the love she could have gotten. It's a sad thought isn't it?"

"It most certainly is," Catherin nodded and took another frame which had a picture of the victim.

"Somehow it's also a good thought that she actually died before she had to go through any hardship that she might have faced through her life," Sara said without thinking. Both persons standing in front of her fixed their piercing blue eyes at her, squinted with disbelief. "Doesn't mean she deserved to die, no not at all." She shook her head vigorously.

"Sometimes your mind just amuses me," Catherine managed to give the brunette a weak smile at which Sara sighed heavily.

"I don't mean to say stuff like that," Sara ran a hand through her hair. "It just comes out."

"Don't take what she says to your heart," Catherine patted on Jerry's shoulders before heading to the door. "She's actually a real sweetheart. You'll grow to love her with time."

Jerry raised an eyebrow at Sara who was giving Catherine a disbelieving look. She turned to Jerry and shrugged before leading the boy to the front door. They informed the cop on duty and headed to the car and back to the lab.

* * *

"Jerry?" Sara patted on the boy's back. He was crouched over the table with his face was on the table. She could see that the man was in a deep sleep but her file was trapped under the boy's head so he needed to wake up. "Jerry." She tried a bit loudly, shaking him slightly. From across the table she saw Catherine give her an amused and cocky grin at which she scowled. It was a wonder how the two women had become quite close feeling comfortable around each other.

After coming back from the crime scene and handing the evidence to the respective departments, they had been going through all other physical evidence, finding nothing constructive. Sara shook the younger boy once again making him sit up quickly, eyes wide and his face quite red. Sara raised her eyebrow at him questioningly as she let the man wake up fully.

"You alright there?" Sara asked softly making the man turned his head towards her. It could be Sara's imagination but she could have sworn that the man flushed even more seeing her standing there.

"Yeah I just fell asleep," He said in a croaky voice, wiping his face hurriedly. He stared at the wall in front him avoiding the brunette in front of him and the blonde at his side. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Sara chuckled and patted on his back. "We all do it," Catherine nodded in agreement. Sara patted on the man's back and bent in front of him to get her file. Jerry's eyes wandered from the wall in front of him to the body bend in front of him. Involuntarily he licked his lips and grabbed the arm rest of his chair, his knuckles almost going white with the force.

"I'm going to see Doc Robbins and get the autopsy results," Sara informed the younger man, oblivious to anything that was happening to him. "You can go get the report from Bobby from Ballistics. He paged me a few minutes ago. Ask him whether both the mother and daughter were killed by the same gun. And any other information you might think is related ok?" She smiled at Jerry and stepped towards the door.

"And I'm going to Wendy," Catherine sat up and headed to the door. "I love it when she puts my evidence ahead of others."

"Of course you do," Sara grinned at the blonde's retreating back and turned to Jerry. She gave him an analytical look and saw that he was softly banging his head on the able, hugging himself tightly.

"Jerry?" Sara called from the door, making Jerry turned around so fast that it actually hurt his neck. "Go now okay?"

"Sure Ms. Sidle," Jerry nodded and stood up making Sara slightly uncomfortable.

"Oh please, call me Sara," With a warm smile, the brunette left the man alone to his thoughts and racing mind.

"Sara," He smiled as he heard himself say the name. "Sara," He repeated it again with a huge grin before he grabbed his jacket and headed to the Ballistics lab.

Soon enough, Jerry was walking out of the Ballistics reading the report on his way. Apparently the victims were shot using two different weapons, concluding that either there were two killers or two guns. Frowning at the fact that his brain was not working at the moment, Jerry decided to head to the break room to get something to drink.

"Yo Jerry," Her stopped at his tracks, in front of the DNA lab. He saw Noel heading towards him with a similar file in his hand.

"What's up?" Jerry asked with a smile, putting his hand in his pants pocket.

Jerry Thomas and Noel Myles were more than just colleagues at the Las Vegas crime lab. The both of them had been best friends since high school and roommates throughout college as well. Although both of them were very different from each other, they got along swimmingly well. Noel was the typical college stud, handsome and smart and someone who always got the pretty girls even when he slept around everyone. Jerry however, as handsome and rich as he was, was never the type of guy who slept around. For him, a girl was more than what she could offer physically, which quite a lot of times got his heart broken. That was until he came upon one person. He saw her in a convention at Connecticut which his classmates attended during their last year of college. And since then, he had been stuck with a crush towards a person who was much older than him, much smarter than him and who was probably taken. Sara Sidle. She was the reason Jerry convinced Noel to move to Vegas although he didn't have to do much convincing since Noel was already packing his bags at the sound of Las Vegas. And to his luck, he was teamed with the one person who occupied all his dreams.

"How's it going man?" Noel patted on his shoulders and hooked an arm around his shoulders. "Fucked her yet?"

"Dude shut the fuck up will you?" Jerry brushed away from his friends. He never liked it when Noel talked about women like it, but this would be one of the few times he actually objected to it. "How many times have I told you, I'm not in this for just the sex."

"Too many," Noel rolled his eyes and lead their way to the break room. "But I gotta say, she's hot. When you told me she was older than you I thought you were talking about some ugly, wrinkly grandma type chick."

"Don't be judgmental Noel," Jerry slapped him on the back of his head. Noel let out a groan of pain and rubbed his head.

"But hey that other chick was really hot too, what was her name…Catherine?" Noel said with a grin which was too familiar to Jerry. It was the smile he has when he wants to score with some girl. "You think she's married?"

"Doubt it," Jerry kept it short. He didn't want to be involved in anything Noel was planning to do.

"Great," Noel grinned mischievously making jerry roll his eyes again.

"You might want to think twice before doing anything Noel, she's a supervisor here," Jerry pointed out making Noel frown.

"So? That Sidle woman is your supervisor too," Noel snapped. "That doesn't want to stop you from wanting to fuck her does it?"

"I told you, I don't want to fuck her," Jerry gulped down, pushing his thoughts to a further corner of his mind.

"Yeah and I'm a damn woman," Noel said in an unbelieving sarcastic tone at which Jerry chuckled. "Come on man, might as well have some fun while we're at it."

"Work is fun," Jerry said in a matter-of-fact tone.

"I mean something that doesn't involve DNA swabs, blood, decomp and paper work," Noel put his arm around Jerry's shoulders and tugged on his friend. "Come on Jerry loosen up. It's Vegas baby."

"Right," Jerry sighed at his friend's immaturity. He let his mind wander to its own world while Noel went to intense explanations on how Vegas was the place to be.

While Jerry was drowning in facts about Vegas, Sara was feeding her dire need of caffeine. She was going through her case when Catherine walked into the room with a tired look on her face.

"What'd Wendy have to say?" Sara asked while Catherine poured herself some coffee.

"There was some kind of adhesive on the girl's face," Catherine said with a sigh. "Looked like Airbag Powder but I made her send it to Trace to be sure." She sat down on the chair opposite to Sara. "The crime occurred in the house so the thought of checking her car didn't come to mind."

"The car on the way?" Sara asked, knowing Catherine well enough to know that the elder CSI must have made the arrangements by now.

"Will reach the garage any minute now," Catherine smiled softly. Both women went silent with that.

Sara was staring at Catherine who was still going through the paper in her hands. Although Catherine felt Sara's gaze on her, she didn't want to look up. And somehow, feeling someone's gaze on her made her mind wander to Alan. He used to hate it when someone else even looked at her. A hint of depressions filled every vein of Catherine when he entered her mind for the umpteenth time that day.

The two women were brought out of their thoughts when Jerry and Noel walked into the room and gave them an observant look.

"Hey guys, how's the lab treating you so far?" Sara asked taking a sip off her coffee while Catherine looked sideways at the boys.

"It's going very good," Jerry said with a shy smile. Catherine caught Noel kick the other boy on the shin, making her very curious. But deciding that it was none of her business, she went back to her coffee.

"You two know each other before this?" Sara asked, clearly having caught Noel's kick on Jerry's leg.

"Since high school," Noel grinned flirtatiously, addressing Catherine. The blonde gave him a questioning look and smiled, sipping some of her coffee again.

"That's a long time," Sara nodded amused by the boys. Her eyes caught the file in Jerry's hands. "Oh, what did Bobby have to say about the bullets?"

"Both 19 mm but they were fired from two different guns," He stepped forward and handed over the file to Sara who frowned. "The daughter was shot at close range and the mother about 6 feet away."

"Same caliber but both guns? So there are two suspects?" Sara put her coffee cup down and started to go through the report thoroughly.

"Could be one person and two guns too," Catherine chipped in before her pager went off. "And that's my cue to leave." She got up and put her coffee cup on the table, stepping into the brunette's personal space. She felt Sara stiffen and take in a sharp intake of air making her step back quickly. "I'll be in the garage ok?" She waved at the room while heading out.

"Bye Cath," Noel waved, making Catherine and Sara both give him a questioning look. Catherine smiled confusedly and headed to her destination.

"So what now Sara?" Jerry asked, slightly hesitant as he said her name. Sara quickly turned to the young man and smiled.

"We go through the crime scene pictures and wait until Mandy processes the prints we collected," Sara closed the file and handed it back to Jerry. "We still need to wait for DNA and Trace to process the rest of the samples too."

"There's a lot of waiting around huh?" Noel asked, scratching his head involuntarily.

"No, we do other work while we are waiting that way there's no waiting around," Sara said with a slight frown. For some reason, she didn't like the boy that much. "I'm going to the lab, I'll see you there ok?" She turned to Jerry and gave him a warm smile at which the boy nodded hurriedly.

"Oh Ms. Sidle?" Noel called her, making the brunette stop at her tracks at the doorway. "Do you maybe know whether Ms. Willows is seeing someone?"

Sara's eyes grew wide, and she was sure her heart skipped a beat. She felt her knees go weak and her palms sweat even though they were buried deep in the pockets of her pants. She shifted on her spot and frowned when she finally realized what Noel's intentions might be.

"I wouldn't know," She decided to play dumb and let the blonde handle it rather than getting involved. "Though you might want to keep your personal and professional life separate or else it would just mess up your work." Her voice was slightly stern and the words came out a bit harsh than she had intended.

"Oh," Noel gave a frightened look at the brunette and looked from Jerry and back to Sara. "I'm sorry, I was just curious."

"Being curious is good in this field," Sara tried to smile but her face contorted badly making it even more frightening for Noel. "But make sure it's towards the right things though alright?" She smiled slightly when Noel nodded like a little kid. She turned to Jerry who had a fascinated smile on his face at which she couldn't help but grin. "Jerry, lab 4 okay?"

"Okay," Jerry smiled with a nod.

Sara gave Noel another look and turned around, leaving the boys alone. Her mind was racing as she made her way to the lab. Her hands curled into fists and relaxed again, inside her pockets as her anxiety hit her.

_What the hell was that? _She thought to herself, blaming herself for being unable to control her feelings. Sara sighed, pushing the door open to the lab. She dropped into the chair and leaned back, resting her whole body.

"Hey Sar," Greg's voice boomed in Sara's head making her sit up and clear her throat nervously. He saw that Greg was giving him a very amused grin at which scowled. "What were you thinking about?" He quivered his eyebrows at the brunette and sat down on the chair next to her.

"I was thinking about how I can stuff your mouth with paper and watch you choke to death," Sara said to the man who went white all of a sudden. Sara broke into a soft laugh at which the young blonde glared angrily.

"Sometimes it's hard to see whether you're joking or whether you're actually serious," Greg pouted and leaned back in his chair.

"Oh come on now Greg, you know I wouldn't do anything like that to you," She pinched the man on the cheeks leaving the spot red.

"Ok stop treating me like a kid," He brushed Sara's hands away, but didn't let go of it. He kissed her palm making Sara chuckle again. "You never know, I can be your knight in shining armor one day."

"Of course you can be," Sara smiled at Greg who opened his mouth to say something. But the door to the lab opened, interrupting him and grabbing both the CSI's attention. At the door stood Jerry, in his confident and steady stance giving them his charming smile.

"Hey….Jerry is it?" Greg bit his lips nervously wondering whether he got the name right. He watched the younger man's eyes go to his own hands entwined with Sara's.

"Yeah, hey," His smile to Greg became slightly cold but it went missed by Sara who took her hand back and went back to work.

"I'll catch you later then my love," Greg gave Sara wink at which Sara stared with questions filled in her eyes.

"Sure Greg," Sara said in a confused tone and watched the man get out of the lab and disappear around a corner. Her eyes' met with the man standing in front of her and saw that he looked as if a meteor had hit him. "Don't mind Greg he likes to fool around like that."

"So, you're not dating him?" He asked taking the seat which was minutes ago preoccupied by Greg. She saw Sara's lips curl into a very fake smile. But he couldn't help but envy the pen she had in between her lips.

"Who Greggo? No, no he's not my type," Sara gulped down loudly and turned back to her laptop.

"Then what's your type?" Jerry asked, opening the file and pretending to go through it. He knew that Sara was looking at him but he didn't dare look up at her and meet the deep browns.

"Excuse me?" Sara said in a slightly nervous tone. Jerry looked up and saw that Sara was biting her pen now.

"Nothing," He shook his head quickly and gulped down the lump in his throat.

"OK, let's get back to work then," Sara oblivious to the tension in the air went back to her laptop.

"Sure," Jerry flashed his charming, crooked smile at the brunette forcing her to smile back.

"Ok so according to Doc Robbins, the daughter had sex prior to her death so maybe DNA can get a match with what he collected from her," Sara said, fighting back a yawn. Jerry looked at the brunette while she explained to him thoroughly everything about the case, along with the findings of Catherine. And he knew that his days at work were going to be very exciting from then onwards.

* * *

"Ok this is useless," Sara slammed the top of her laptop close. She saw Jerry flinch at the force she used to close it. "Sorry but I get frustrated when we have no leads in cases like this."

They had been working for a few hours and gotten to nowhere. Catherine had joined Sara and Jerry after processing the car getting nothing but a few paint scrapings and DNA samples. They had been for quite long without getting any closer to even getting a suspect or even a motive.

"I understand," Jerry smiled knowingly, running his hand through his hair. Three of them were tired, frustrated and having a bad headache as well.

"Well shift ended an hour ago so what do you say we wrap up for now and carry on with this tonight?" Sara stretched her body, lifting her arms above her head and heaving her chest. She couldn't see Jerry's eyes grow wide and him gulping down hard as she caught the sight of the brunette. Catherine was a bit too busy resting her head against the table to catch the boy's change of expression as well.

"Yeah, uh huh, that sounds good," Jerry quickly got up, gathering everything scattered on the table. Sara turned her head towards the blonde who hadn't move in a while.

"Why don't you go lock these up?" Sara handed the evidence box to Jerry who nodded. "I'll see you tonight then."

"Ok," Jerry nodded and headed out of the door. The brunette didn't see the quick glance he caught of her before he disappeared out of her sight.

Sara sat on the chair next to Catherine's and ran her hand over the blonde's hair. Catherine quickly lifted her head up, with a piece of paper stuck on her cheek. She quickly brushed it away seeing Sara's coy grin.

"What's up?" Catherine asked, suppressing a yawn. She looked around and frowned to see that it was just the two of them. "Where's your boy?"

"Sent him home," Sara got up and stretched her body again. "Shift's over. Still up for breakfast?" Sara asked curiously.

"Why not," Catherine put all the papers in the file and got up.

After grabbing their stuff from the locker room both women in their own cars headed to the diner. In her car Sara was still pondering over Catherine's words. _Your smile's intoxicating. _She couldn't understand why she couldn't get it out of her mind. And she couldn't understand how she could be herself again around Catherine and only around Catherine. But she was curious. Very curious.

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**hate the new characs of mine? lemme no...reviews makes my day :) thnx for readin peeps**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**Ok this took a bit longer than i thought...but i'll try to update a bit more regularly now. i re-wrote this chapter a few times and finally it's down to something i can agree with. nothing much happens other than the girls getting to know each other which i think is quite important...so let me know what you guys think...and thanks for the reviews :) **

**for you my angel...**

**Disclaimer: Same as Chapter 1...ENJOY and review pls...**

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Catherine peered out of the window at the beautiful sky. The sun was hiding behind the grey clouds. It looked as if it was going to rain. Such atmospheres always calmed her rather than the sunny, dry and warm days. She shifted slightly in her seat but groaned heavily. She couldn't understand why her muscles were so sore but it hurt to even stretch her back. Cursing her body, she parked the car in front of the diner and got out. She saw that Sara was already there, leaning on her car, completely lost in her own world.

_Wonder what actually goes through that mind of hers. _Catherine thought while heading towards her colleague.

Catherine softly put her hand on Sara's shoulder making the younger woman jump and turn around. Sara's stance became less stiffened and her face calmed as soon as she saw the blonde. Her lips curved to a soft smile which clearly didn't reach her beautiful brown eyes. Catherine had always admired the younger woman's eyes, they were deep and oh so innocent with a hint of mischief in it.

"Hey, you took your time," Sara said playfully leading their way into the diner.

"Sorry about that," Catherine said sheepishly. "I kinda get lost in this little world when I drive."

"Isn't that cute," Sara said coyly before opening the door for Catherine. The blonde scrunched her face at Sara before she entered the diner.

A cheerful blonde greeted them as they entered the almost empty diner. Sara gave her a scared smile and followed the girl to the booth. She waited until Catherine sat down to take the seat opposite to the blonde's. The both ordered their breakfast and sat quietly.

It was clear to anyone who was watching the two women that they were quite uncomfortable at the moment. Catherine was playing nervously with her fingers while Sara tapped the table patiently. To a stranger, it would seem that the two of them were on a very nerve wrecking first date. Sara bit her lips and looked at the blonde who had her eyes fixed on her own hands. Deciding that she would not talk, Sara cleared her throat and rummaged through her brain to find something to talk about.

"So…" She started to talk and paused when Catherine looked up at her. "You used to hate me huh? Or do you still hate me?"

"I never hated you," Catherine said quickly, leaning back on her chair. "I just liked to fight with you. After a long time I had someone who questioned my opinions. Others are just too timid or too sweet to say anything at my face regarding what I think or do."

Sara gave Catherine a questioning look. _She actually liked all those fights all these years? Is it just me or is that a little bit weird? _She scratched her chin in thought making Catherine frown.

"Hey I like a challenge," Catherine said defensively. "And you were one. Don't judge me for liking to have someone like me around a very boring lab."

"I'm not judging you," Sara said in a genuine tone of voice. "I'm not saying I didn't like arguing. I liked contradicting anything you said. It was just fun to see that vein pop on your forehead. But I never liked it when it always went out of control."

Catherine laughed at Sara's words. It felt good to laugh and have fun with someone after a long time.

"We never seemed to control the fights from always getting too far," Sara scratched her head softly. "I never liked it. I always thought we could be friends, that we could get along really well. To be frank, we both do think alike at times a lot."

"Yeah we do," Catherine agreed, nodding softly. "But I guess we always let our differences in opinions get the best of us. So we were never able to sit down like this and talk about things, as friends."

"Well it's never too late to start now is it?" Sara suggested softly. She was slightly hopeful that what she suggested would actually be possible. She loved talking to Catherine, to be around her. After a long time, she felt like she had a friend again. A friend she could rely on and enjoy her time with. Of course she had Greg and Nick, but they were more like brothers to her than friends. They were protective, slightly judgmental about what she does and doesn't do, and a bit immature at times to her likings. And of course men were never the same as women.

"Of course it's not," Catherine agreed and opened her mouth to say something else but the waitress cut into their conversation. She placed their order in front of them and smiled as cheerfully as she did before. This time, Catherine gave her a questioning look at which she smiled again. When the waitress left, Catherine gave Sara a 'what-is-up-with-her' look making Sara grin.

"Some people are just too cheerful," Sara took a sip off her coffee.

"It's fucking scary," Catherine raised a sarcastic eyebrow and went to her food. They ate in silent for a while before Catherine spoke again. "Thanks again Sara, for last night," She said softly. "You and I were never friends but you still stayed with me and comforted me, I really appreciate it."

"Hey I always saw u as a friend even if we never had an official 'commitment ceremony' Cath," Sara said coyly. "Plus who can resist but help a damsel in distress huh?" She said with a wink.

Catherine choked on her coffee with laughter making Sara's inside's jolt. Why hadn't she noticed the calmness in that laugh before? She shook her head to clear the question out of her mind.

"I don't remember being held captive by some evil villain," Catherine said playfully. "But I don't mind someone like you being my hero."

"Well I'm honored my lady," Sara bowed slightly making Catherine's smile even bigger. Sara noticed that it finally reached her eyes, the twinkle in the deep blues made Sara feel calm. And that made her even more confused.

A few minutes were spent in silence again but it wasn't uncomfortable at all. All of a sudden both women were content being around each other. The comfort built up between them so fast that it should have scared them, but they weren't scared. They were perfectly happy about it.

"Oh, what do you think of the youngsters?" Catherine asked referring to the rookies working with them. She saw Sara frown slightly.

"I like Jimmy, he's quite enthusiastic about work but I have a feeling there's something more to his 'charms' than he wants us to see," Sara started to share her analysis with Catherine. "I haven't met the one who was assigned to Warrick but he looked as if he would start to cry the minute anyone says something loudly at him," Sara's words made Catherine chuckle like a little girl. "I don't like the one assigned to Nick, Noel I think his name is. He's a bit distracted and a bit of a player if you ask me."

"Wow, got to hand it to that curious investigator in you Sidle," Catherine said in an amused tone. "How do you know Noel is a player? Did he hit on you?" She asked, quivering her eyebrows playfully.

"No, he didn't hit on me," Sara said shying away slightly. "But he did ask me about you." Catherine's eyes grew wide with curiosity.

"He asked what about me?" She asked, leaning forward in her seat.

"Whether you were dating anyone or not," Sara said frankly taking a bit of her food. However, she stopped when Catherine started to laugh heartily.

"That little boy was actually thinking of dating me?" Catherine said still laughing softly. "That's hilarious."

"Well you are quite beautiful so I can't say I'm surprised," Sara said without thinking. But the words did bring a hint of red on the blonde's cheeks.

"Thank you," She said softly. "So what did you say when he asked you?"

"I said I wouldn't know, and told him to focus his curiosity on work rather than on other things," Sara shrugged without thinking it was a big deal.

"You scared him didn't you?" Catherine said slyly.

"No…well ok maybe a little bit," Sara bit her lips nervously with a smile. "I just don't like hormonal teenagers trying to hit on any woman around them," Sara said scrunching up her face. Sara's actions were making sure that the smile on Catherine's face didn't wither.

"Neither do I, and Sara I don't think they are teenagers," Catherine stated the obvious making Sara roll her eyes while taking the last bite of her food. "Well don't worry, if he actually does approach me I will turn him down either painfully or easily," Catherine shrugged. "That's depending on how he actually approaches me." She added with a wink.

"That might be wise," Sara nodded pushing her empty plate away. "Because I think the main reason the boy actually came to Vegas was to 'score' with chicks." Sara said in a bored voice, mimicking the air quotes.

"Of course," Catherine said with a soft laugh. "Oh I never asked you, what made you leave sunny California and come to the sin city anyway?" She asked curiously.

"Grissom," Sara answered shortly making Catherine frown, more questions lining up in her head. "I attended one of his seminars there. I was intrigued by the man's intellect. And then he called me and gave me a chance to come work with him. That was an offer I couldn't refuse."

"So your little crush on him brought you here huh?" Catherine asked coyly, this time making Sara choke on her coffee.

"Oh no," She said in between her soft coughs. "I never had a crush on him. I admit I admired him. But more as a mentor than anything else."

"Sure, I'll believe you," Catherine said in a sarcastic tone making Sara scrunch her face.

"Seriously, I never saw him more than a friend, never," Sara tried to defend herself edging Catherine on.

"Sara calm down, I was just pulling your leg," Catherine decided to play nice since the younger woman had put on her serious face on.

"Oh..ok," Sara said softly, feeling a bit stupid. "Well, yeah…urm ok." She kept mumbling to herself.

Catherine just laughed at the brunette's eloquence and finished her breakfast while Sara sat, leaning back on the chair sipping her coffee sheepishly.

"So you seeing anyone at the moment?" Catherine asked, as curious as she sounded before. She saw Sara's eyes grow wide and back to normal making her even more curious.

"No," Sara answered shortly. Catherine was accepting the brunette to say something else but the look on Sara's face said that she was done talking with just that.

"Why not?" Catherine asked, deciding to urge Sara to talk about it more.

"No reason," Sara said softly and glanced a look at Catherine who had a frown on her face. "Just don't feel like dating at the moment."

"Bad breakup?" Catherine guessed making Sara smile.

"No," Sara gulped down the last of her coffee. "Just don't feel like it."

"Ok," Catherine concluded that she was not going to get anything out of the brunette just yet. So she decided to keep that topic for a later day.

"How's Lindsey doing?" Sara asked, changing the topic from her completely. She saw Catherine let out a tired sigh before she spoke.

"She's being as good as a rebellious teenager can be," Catherine said softly. "Being her mother, anything I say or do for her always comes out as the wrong thing," She ran her fingers through her hair. "She never came back to being my little girl after Eddie died. She always kept a distance from me. And growing up, she just kept making the bigger with every year."

A hint of guilt ran through Sara's body. She wondered whether her being unable to find the person who did that to Eddie had anything to do with what was happening between Catherine and Lindsey.

"It's not your fault so don't think of blaming you even for a second," Catherine read Sara's mind from the look on the brunette's face. "She's my daughter. I don't expect anything but stubbornness, arguments and rebel from her. But sometimes it just hurts, that's all."

Catherine sighed again. She looked worn out just talking about it but Sara noticed that she didn't look hopeless just yet.

"Well I'm always here if you want to talk about it," Sara offered slightly hesitant as to whether it was something Catherine would want. "I know that I have no idea of how to even start to take care of a child, specially a teenager but you can always talk to me whenever you need to. I'll try to be of some help."

Catherine just stared at the nervous woman in front of her. _Why the hell is she so worried about not being of any help to people when she's a natural at it? _

"Thanks Sara," Catherine nodded with a comforting smile. "I'll surely take you up on that offer."

"Great," Sara nodded, still anxious. Just then the waitress came over asking whether they wanted anything else. The two women exchanged looks and decided that they would call it a day. "No thanks. Check?" The waitress smiled and left them alone again.

"Well this was more pleasant than I thought it would be," Catherine stated frankly while Sara nodded in agreement.

"Yeah it was," Sara licked her lips involuntarily. "I thought we'll either stay silent or get into an argument about what we want to eat."

"I would take offense for that but I can't say I was expecting anything less pleasant than what you just said," Catherine grinned as sheepishly as Sara. "Guess we proved ourselves wrong huh?"

"Well sometimes it's a good thing to be wrong," Sara shrugged. "I'm not complaining this time." Catherine nodded just when the waitress brought the check to them.

They fought for a while on who is making the payment. The waitress kept staring at them while they argued with smiles playing on their lips and coyness reflecting in every word.

"I'm paying today,"

"No, let me pay, come on,"

"But I want to pay so let it go,"

"No I am paying. Come on, it's not even much,"

"Exactly so let me pay,"

"No I want to pay, you can pay the next time,"

"But I want to pay this time,"

"Sara!"

"Catherine!"

"Let me pay,"

"No, I'm paying,"

"No I am,"

"How about you split and each pay half?" The waitress suggested after a while. Both women looked at her and then back at each other.

"Works for me,"

"Me too,"

"But next time, I'm paying,"

"We'll decide that when the time comes,"

"Fine. spoilsport,"

The waitress took the money from the women and headed to the counter. To her Sara and Catherine looked like a bunch of idiots but to the two women, they were just starting the journey of a beautiful friendship.

Sara and Catherine walked out of the door into the bright sunlight after receiving a cheerful goodbye and a request to come back soon from the waitress. Catherine frowned since she clearly remembered it being a lot more pleasant than sunshine shining brightly on their faces.

"I thought it was going to rain," Catherine said with a frown.

"Guess weather changed its mind," Sara said incoherently. Catherine was actually surprised that Sara could even think illogical but she noted that she liked that side of Sara.

"Well I'll see you at work tonight then," Catherine smiled at the brunette who nodded and buried her hands deep in her pockets. "This was great, we should do this a bit more often."

"Yeah I agree," Sara put on her shades and smiled at the blonde. "Where did you park your car? I'll walk you to it."

"It's right there, you don't need to," Catherine pointed at her car almost in front of the diner. "Thank you."

"Bye then," Sara lifted her shoulders slightly not knowing what else to do. Catherine quickly stepped into Sara's personal space and put an arm around Sara's neck sort of hugging the brunette. Sara put one of her hands on Catherine's waist and rubbed her back until Catherine stepped back.

"See you," With that, Catherine headed to the car. She turned her head to see that Sara was still watching her. When the brunette saw her turn around, she waved at her before putting her hand back in her pockets. But to Catherine's surprise Sara didn't walk away. She just kept staring at her.

Thinking that Sara was just waiting until Catherine got into the car, she hurried her steps and got into her car. The blonde took one last glance at her friend before driving off. From the side view mirror she saw that Sara had turned her back and was finally heading to her own car.

As she turned her car around the corner of the street, she couldn't help but catch a glance of herself on the review mirror. She had a smile on her lips. Why, she didn't know but she didn't care. She didn't mind smiling, she wanted to be happy. How or why, who cares? Being happy wasn't a sin.

While Catherine was lost in her own little world, she didn't realize that the traffic light in front of her had turned red. She didn't stop the car. All of a sudden, she felt a car collide to her side of the car, throwing her towards the passenger's seat. The air bag blew up on her face and all she could feel was the blinding pain that ran through her body.

"Fuck," She could still move but it hurt. She pushed away the airbag away and after countless effort, she was free from the white bag which was suffocating her. She looked out of the window to see the hood of a car pushed against her door. A piece of metal was cut into her sides but that cut was numb hence she wasn't feeling the pain.

While she was trying to think of a way to get out of the car, the passenger door flew open and someone peeked in through the door. Breathing heavily, Catherine took off her seatbelt and turned to face the person who took her hand and was trying to pull her out of the door. Her eyes met the deep browns and the pale face.

"Come on Cath, pull yourself up and scoot over here," The calming voice said, pulling her body towards theirs.

"Sara," Catherine smiled and pulled her body to the passenger seat. And she didn't know how but Sara practically carried her out of the car and put her back on the ground.

"Are you alright?" Sara cupped Catherine's face before she started to check Catherine's body for any visible injuries. As soon as she saw Catherine's sides, she put her hand on it and put pressure on the wound. "What the hell were you thinking running a red light?" Sara's voice was filled with concern, anger and confusion.

"I didn't see it," Catherine said simply, wincing when Sara's fingers met the cut skin.

"You need to stop getting lost in that little world of yours too often when you're driving," Sara said sighing heavily. She turned her head towards the sirens that were approaching the scene.

"Is the other driver ok?" Catherine asked quickly trying to turn around but Sara stopped her.

"He's fine, he just banged his head on the steering wheel," Sara said sternly. "As long as you have insurance you're ok. Please tell me you have insurance?" Sara asked jokingly.

"Of course I do," Catherine bit her lips as the numbness of her wound started to fade. Now it was starting to hurt quite badly. She put her hands on Sara's shoulders and rested her weight on the younger woman.

"Come on, let's get you to the paramedics," Sara said putting her free hand on the other side of Catherine's waist. "Can you walk?" Catherine nodded and took a step to almost fall onto the ground when her knees gave away. "Okay, here you go," Without taking her hand off of the wound, Sara picked Catherine into her arms. A part of Catherine was screaming for her to jump off this woman's arms and walk to the paramedics herself but another part of her was telling her to just stay in her arms and feel secure, even if it's for a few seconds. For once, Catherine gave into that weak voice inside her.

"Hey paramedics over here, she's hurt," Sara called while Catherine wrapped her arms around Sara's neck tightly, resting her head on the brunette's shoulders.

While Sara went to talk to the police officers at the scene, the paramedics attended to Catherine's wounds on spot. They tried to take her to the hospital to get more medical attention but she refused after they gave her something to reduce the pain. Holding her sides, she limped towards Sara who was in deep conversation with the officer who looked quite familiar. As soon as she stepped next to the brunette, Sara turned around with a look of concern filled in her eyes.

"What are you doing here?" Sara said, looking over her shoulders to check where the paramedics were. "Aren't they taking you to the hospital?"

"No I'm fine, really I am," Catherine patted on Sara's arm and turned to the officer. "So officer, what's happening now?"

"Well, the driver doesn't want to press charges since he was going above the speed limit as well," The man spoke politely. "So our job here is done really. We'll tow the cars to the yard. You might want to talk to him about the damages on his car though."

"Thanks," Catherine smiled as the officer left. She turned to the man whose car crashed into hers. "Hey I'm going to go talk to him. Could you give me a lift home when I'm done?" She asked Sara, still staring at the man in front of him.

"Sure," Sara patted on Catherine's back.

After dealing with the driver, Catherine limped her way to Sara's car in which the brunette sat with her windows down. When she saw Catherine walking towards her, her lips curved into a smile making the blonde herself smile.

"Everything ok?" Sara asked when she got into the car. Catherine just nodded and put on her seatbelts. "Are YOU ok?" Sara asked before driving off.

"I just, I don't know what got into me, but I really wasn't paying any attention to the road," Catherine said running her hands through her hair. "I feel so stupid and ashamed. What if something happened to that man?"

"Well nothing happened so don't hover around the 'what if's' Cath," Sara took Catherine's hand. "And I'm sure you will never let something like that happen again. That's all that matters now."

"I guess," Catherine sighed, gulping down a lump in her throat. She looked at Sara who was giving her a sympathetic yet comforting look. And just like that, she felt as if everything was going to be ok. "I'm sorry about this."

"Hey don't be," Sara waved an arm in front of her. "It's a good thing we take the same road home, or else you might have had to take a cab." She added with a hint of mischief in her voice.

"Thanks Sara," Catherine smiled, this time genuinely. "For everything. You're totally becoming the hero of this damsel in distress." She grinned making Sara laugh.

"Anytime my lady," Sara smiled slyly, patted on Catherine's hands and drove off.

While Sara was thanking god that Catherine was fine, all Catherine could think of was about one thing;

_Why am I suddenly depending on someone I haven't even tried to get to know before two or so days ago? How is this woman, the hot tempered social outcast, the moody workaholic making me feel so comforted and calm during one of the most terrible days I have had in my life? Why and how is Sara becoming such an important part of my life just like that?_

Confused, she kept the questions to herself. Maybe one day, she will be able to figure out the answers to them. For now, all she wanted was to get some sleep.

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**drop in a line and let me know what you think...or how you think i should go on with this, might give me some new ideas too...**

**thanks for reading...**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

**Well i wrote this chapter and forgot about it completely hence it took a bit longer to post. Next chapter might be up a bit earlier than usual...Hope you all like this chapter...**

**For my curious angel...  
**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1...ENJOY and review pls**

_

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I was walking down the road. It was so quiet, almost eerie but for some reason it was really calming. My hair was short, it stopped at my ears and I was thin, very thin. The cold, strong wind was glazing on my body, making me shiver. The short skirt and revealing tank top was not helping me with the cold at all. I looked around, looking for some kind of living being around the ghost town. _

"_Hey," I heard a male voice behind me, making me turn around anxiously. Charming eyes met mine, handsome features made me smile and the crooked smile made me curious. "The name's Eddie."_

"_Catherine," I managed to say in somewhat a whisper. He took my hand and kissed it, letting his tongue swirl on my palm. I couldn't help but let out a soft giggle at his actions. _

_He took my hand and entwined his strong fingers with mine. He was holding onto me tightly, talking to me and joking with me. He was keeping my mind off everything, my surroundings, the eeriness flowing around me, killing the loneliness that was eating me and even making me smile. He was leading me to a clearing, it was a beautiful place. Grass covered the ground, a pond nearby and trees decorating the landscape. He carried me into his arms and laid me on the ground, on a blanket that was not there seconds ago. And then everything went into a blissful blur. _

_I opened my eyes again, under a blanket with grass poking on my bare back. I look around to find him but he was nowhere to be found. My clothes were gone and I was completely naked under the dark, cold night with nothing but a blanket. I stood up and wrapped the blanket around me, covering what I could. I walked around, out of the clearing and stepped onto the road again. Before I could take one step, I felt a soft small hand on my thighs. I looked down to see a beautiful little girl, a replica of me standing next to me, grabbing onto the corner of my blanket with one hand while she held onto a Care Bear with the other. She gave me a soft smile and I dropped my hand, took her hand into mine and squeezed it. We both started to walk again, together smiling, joking and fighting as we went. While we headed to wherever we were going, I saw Eddie frequently popping out of nowhere, kissing the little girl's forehead and then disappear again. He never looked at me, but his love for that little girl was pure and it was reflected in his words. The sky was as dark as it was, but the dark eerie night wasn't scary anymore. But I could feel my body craving for something. But what?_

_We came to a cross road, in front was a wooden sign with something or maybe someone laying at its bottom. The girl next to me headed to whatever it was and stopped inches away from it. She knelt down and checked what it was and looked at me. Her innocent eyes filled with tears, a weep escaped her trembling lips telling me exactly what it was. I hurried to her and pulled her into my arms, looking down at the bloody, lifeless body of whom she called father. She snuggled into my bare body as my hands couldn't hold the blanket anymore. I held onto her tightly as I felt tears crawled down my stomach making my eyes filled up as well. We were both clearly alone now, with no one to look after us. I closed my eyes and felt my head swirl around. I couldn't see a thing, nor hear anyone. But I still felt the girl in my arms, sobbing onto my chest. _

_My vision came back again and I kissed the top of the head of the girl in my arms. My hair was longer, covering my bare breasts and I was certainly not as thin as I was before. And the girl had changed._ _She wasn't the small young girl anymore. She was grown, her eyes still filled with tears but strength filled in them as well. I cupped her face and wiped the tears off her face at which she smiled. She stood up and held her hand for me to take. I got hold of my blanket again and got up, taking her hand. We chose the left road, the safer and brighter looking one. I felt her grip on my hand become tighter, but I knew she wasn't scared. She was looking out for me. The thought made me smile. _

_We were walking down the same road although we weren't laughing anymore. We were talking and fighting, although she was still holding my hand. Then we stopped at our tracks. In front of us were like 10 young boys, all of them handsome, charming and looking at one direction. They were looking at the girl holding onto my hand. I looked at her to see that she was smiling at them flirtatiously. All the boys came and held their hands for her to take. She gave me a smile, kissed me on the cheek and disappeared into their midst. _

"_Lindsey," I called for her, holding my hand out for her. But she just looked back, waved at me and walked away with them. _

_Tears rolled down my cheek as my calls for her went unheard. The eeriness of the night was back. Now I stood in the middle of the road all alone. I was cold, scared and wanting someone's help. But I couldn't find anyone at sight. I wrapped the blanket around me forcefully trying to make myself warmer but it wasn't helping. And the tears filling in my eyes were not even close to stopping. But I still kept walking. The cold wind was cutting through my skin and shattered glasses on the road were cutting into the skin under my foot. I knew I was leaving traces of blood but I didn't care. _

"_You're bleeding," I heard a calming voice from my back forcing me to turn around. He was a handsome man. Shoulder length hair, piercing blue eyes, built body and a calming smile. He walked towards me and stopped inches from me. "Let me help you." With that he bent down and picked me into his arms easily. I couldn't help but wrap my arms around his neck. "I'm Alan," He said locking his eyes with mine. I smiled and bit my lips before I told him my name. _

_And he just carried me, through the lonely road talking to me, making me laugh and kissing me once every now and then. I felt secure in his arms. I was convinced that he wouldn't let me go no matter what. It seemed as if we just walked for hours, having fun and loving each other's companionship. No sweat broke from his forehead all the while he carried me, it was as if he wanted to do it. Finally we came to a cliff. He walked us to the edge of the cliff, holding me securely in his arms. He put me down and pulled me into his arms, kissing me fervently running his hands all over my body. But just as I opened my eyes, I felt him slip out of my grip. His eyes were twinkling with the charming smile still playing on his lips. Just like that, he turned around and started to walk away from me. I called his name but he didn't look back. I couldn't move, my whole body had frozen up. He just kept walking, giving a deaf ear to my calls until he disappeared into the night. Just like everyone else had._

_I felt my knees hit the ground and a loud sob escape my lips. My face buried in my hand I wept loudly into the night. No one to hear me, to comfort me and to take care of me. I was completely alone. Now what? I took in a deep breath and stood up, wiping the tears off my face. I let the blanket fall down on my feet and turned towards the edge of the cliff. Slowly I walked towards the edge and looked down to see a rocky ground, waiting for me. I couldn't help but smile. _

_Just when I leaned forward, letting myself go I felt something on my back. Someone's warm hands on my shoulders pulling me back. The blanket that I let go was now being wrapped around me by someone. I tried to turn my head but the chin resting on my shoulders stopped me. The side of the person's cheeks touched mine, right before the lips pecked on it. _

"_Not yet," The voice said, making my insides jolt. Just the voice made the hollow hole on me fill up. It filled up with hope, care and love. It made me smile genuinely. The hands held my waist and turned me around. Browns locked with blue, and the sly genuine smile met an insecure one. _

"_Sara," She said softly making sure the blanket was covering my body. She took off her jacket and pulled it over my shoulder as well letting the cold night wrap around her body instead of mine. "Hi Cath," She smiled at me, without waiting for me to say anything. _

_She took both my hands into hers and pulled me away from the edge. I was now standing away from the edge while she stood at my place, one step away from falling down the cliff. I looked at her and tried to pull her away from the edge but she just brushed away the effort with a smile. Her fingers ran down my cheek and onto my neck, playing with the hair resting there. She stepped one step closer to me, standing inches away from me. I felt her hot breath on my lips before she claimed them as hers. It was passionate and she took her time, without rushing it. She was soft, considerate and even through her kiss I could tell that she would look out for me no matter what. I closed my eyes, letting her hands roam around my body and her lips play with my tongue. _

Catherine woke up sitting up on her bed, sweat breaking from her forehead. She was breathing heavily and to her surprise her eyes were wet. She shook the imaged out of her head and held her hair as she tried to regain control over her thoughts.

"What the hell was that?" Catherine said to herself, taking deep breaths. "Sara?" She bit her lips in confusion and dropped back onto her bed back again.

"That can't be right?" She kept mumbling to herself. "I think I've been seeing too much of that girl lately," She ran a hand through her hair.

"But I dreamt of her kissing me?" Involuntarily she licked her lips as if trying to remember that taste. "I can't be dreaming of her in a sexual manner. It's Sara I mean come on," She sat up again, pulling her knees close to her chest. "Sure she's beautiful in a mysterious kinda way and quite sexy too," She licked her lips again, this time at the image that formed in her head of Sara.

"And she's so freaking sweet and amazing. She would totally make a great partner," She rested her chin on her knees mesmerized by the thoughts. "She most probably is quite amazing in bed too." She felt a soft tingling feeling in her belly as she washed her mind with the thought of kissing Sara. She closed her but opened them just like that.

"What the hell am I thinking?" She shook her head and jumped out of the bed. "I must be going crazy." She was just about to enter the bathroom when she heard movements outside her door. Not caring that she was just wearing a long tank top which barely covered her back, she opened the door.

Catherine felt as if she was hit by thunder. In front of her, a young teenage boy had her daughter pinned to the bedroom door, kissing her furiously and running his hands all over her body. Lindsey's top was being pulled up by the boy's movements and her hair was getting messed as she got grinded against her own bedroom door. Catherine just stood frozen at her tracks while Lindsey and the boy fought over dominance over whatever they were doing.

"Lindsey!" Catherine said sternly, finally finding her voice again. The two teenagers turned to her and while Lindsey rolled her eyes, the boy kept staring at Catherine, more accurately at her half covered breasts.

"Nice," He said appreciatively and turned to Lindsey. "That your mom? She's hot." He turned his head back towards Catherine and continued his gaze over her body, going further down her breasts this time.

"Look down even one more inch and I'll show you how it feels like to get your eyes ripped right out of your socket," Catherine said, pointing a finger at the boy who quickly backed away from Lindsey and turned around.

"Mom, you can't talk to Kyle like that," Lindsey stepped forward with her hands on her waist and with an angry look on her face.

"Yes I can," Catherine put on the same stance. It was scary as to how alike they both looked at the moment. "And what is 'Kyle' doing here at this time of the night?"

"He dropped me off from Stacey's," Lindsey said firmly without losing her ground. "And I just wanted to show him my room."

"Oh I think you had plans to show him a lot more than your room," Catherine squinted her eyes at her guilty daughter who just rolled her eyes. He turned to the boy who had a coy grin on his face. "Thank you for dropping Lindsey home Kyle. You can leave now."

Kyle nodded and turned stepped closer to Lindsey, placing his hands on her waist. "I'll see you at school tomorrow," He placed a brave kiss on Lindsey's cheek and turned around to leave. Lindsey just stood there, staring at Catherine with a smile playing on her lips.

Both mother and daughter stood staring at each other until they heard the front door open and close. Catherine took a deep breath and wiped her face.

"What are you doing Lindsey, this is not the age for all this," She said, tired out of her mind.

"Mom, don't start with the advices please," Lindsey said firmly. "I've already heard it like a million times. It's getting old."

"You haven't heard me clearly enough then," Catherine retorted. "Or else you wouldn't have let a horny teenage boy pin you against your bedroom door."

"I told you already, I'm not a little girl anymore," Lindsey spat as angrily as Catherine. Catherine opened her mouth to say something but her eyes locked with her daughter's. Her jaws dropped when she saw that Lindsey's eyes were blood shot and her pupils were dilated. She stepped closer to Lindsey who stood her ground with a confused frown. But she stepped back when Catherine sniffed her. "What are you doing mom," She asked in a slightly hesitant voice.

"Did you smoke weed Lindsey?" Catherine asked furiously, her eyes clearly reflecting it almost, just almost scaring Lindsey.

"No," Lindsey's words came out with a slight tremble and it didn't convince Catherine, not one bit.

"Lindsey," Catherine said in her most stern voice making Lindsey look down with guilt.

"Ok yeah I did. We found Stacey's brother's stash and thought we'll try it out," She said in a timid voice, finding the floor very amusing at the moment. And then all of a sudden, she looked up, her look as firm as it was before. "So what? It's not like you never did drugs."

"I have done a lot of things but that doesn't give you the right to do whatever you please," Catherine said, torn between shock, anger and annoyance.

"Well I am your daughter," Lindsey shrugged in a mocking manner. "Just be glad that you didn't find me stripping in some trashy club."

Catherine wanted to slap her daughter then and there but she controlled herself. She made a fist so tight that her knuckles were white.

"Don't compare my life to yours," Catherine pointed her finger at her daughter who didn't fidget at the anger reflected in her voice. "I have given you everything you asked for. How dare you throw my past on my face like that?"

"You gave me everything? Ha, what a joke," Lindsey said sarcastically. "You couldn't even give me the time my drunk father was able to give me, and now you go on saying you gave me everything? Don't kid yourself mom."

Catherine felt as if she had gone numb. She wanted to scream and cry but her body was not reacting to anything her mind was telling her.

"Linds…" She opened her mouth but was cut short by Lindsey.

"You know what, whatever," Lindsey shrugged and turned to the room. "I'm going to sleep. I'll see you tomorrow," She opened her bedroom door but stopped at her tracks with a mocking smile on her lips. "Oh what am I saying, of course not." With that she disappeared into her room and slammed the door behind her.

Catherine stood at the hallway, shocked, sad and angry. She knew Lindsey was as rebellious she was when she was young but she never expected her daughter to take the exact path she once walked. Lindsey's words always hurt her but tonight she felt broken. She couldn't help but blame herself for what her daughter was doing. Just then she heard the alarm go off in her room and knew that she had to get ready for work or else she would be late. She turned around to get into her room but turned around to give a look at the closed door of Lindsey's door.

"I'm sorry sweety," She said softly before hurrying into the bathroom to take a quick shower. She took off her tank top and threw it on the bed and ran her hand over the covered cut on her waist. With a snap, she took the bandage off her body and checked the cut. It didn't look bad but the painful sting was refusing to leave her, especially when something touched it. She ran her fingers over the cut and all of a sudden, all she can feel was Sara's hand holding her by the waist, covering her cut carefully. A hint of calmness ran over all of her sense with the thought of Sara holding her, making her close her eyes and sigh heavily. Her eyes jolted open again and shook her head.

"What the hell…" She kept shaking her head confused by her own thoughts. Deciding that a cold shower was in order to get the dream out of her mind, she stepped into the shower.

After a quick yet relaxing shower, Catherine hurried downstairs with her jacket over her shoulders and purse on the other. Just when she grabbed her keys she remembered that her car was towed.

"SHIT! I'm going to be late," She banged her hand on the wooden table and grabbed her phone from her purse. The first person who came into her mind to call was Sara but her dream flashed through her mind. And with that the tingling feeling she felt in her stomach when she thought of kissing Sara came back. "Ok, not a good idea," She gulped down the lump in her throat and decided that she'd call Warrick instead.

In a few she was hopping into Warrick's car and heading to work. The ride started off quietly but Catherine's unfocused eyes caught Warrick's attention.

"Alright Cath?" He asked cautiously. Catherine gave him a sweet smile and nodded which didn't convince the man at all. "You don't look so good. Everything ok?"

"Try to raise a teenage girl on your own Rick," Catherine said with a smirk. "You will know that you are never alright. Something is always going to be bothering you."

"Well I don't plan to do that for a while," Warrick chuckled. "But I surely will come to you for advice when I want to stop myself from kicking a boy in between his legs for trying to hit on my baby girl."

"Can I come to you when I feel like doing that too?" Catherine grinned. "But I would come to ask you to actually kick his ass."

"Oh I would love to beat up a little boy for trying to hit on little Lindsey," Warrick said in an enthusiastic manner.

"There's a boy named Kyle in Lindsey's school. Find him and kick his head off, I don't care how many Kyle's you have to beat up just to get to the right one," Catherine said with a scowl. "And according to Lindsey, she's not 'little' anymore."

"Kyle, ok I'll remember," Warrick nodded with a smile. "And whatever that girl say, to me she's always going to be that little girl who told me that all she wanted to do when she grow up was to buy all the Barbie dolls in the world and have the biggest make-believe tea party on earth."

"Oh my god, I forgot that she used to say that," Catherine laughed at the thought of it. She had forgotten how cute Lindsey used to be like. It was hard for her to think that that sweet little naïve girl turn out be the bitter, hurtful teenager she is now. "I don't know why kids can't stay like that forever."

"It's the rule of nature, everyone has to grow up and reach maturity," Warrick said rationally. It was odd to listen to Warrick be all intellectual but for some reason, it eased Catherine's paranoia. "And think about it, if kids don't grow up the murders we investigate would become a lot more sad, creepier and depressing Cath," Warrick said, frowning as his mind clearly giving him a clear image how the world would be if children never grew up.

"Oh yeah, my god that would be creepy," Catherine agreed, biting a nail with thought.

While Catherine and Warrick headed to work with bizarre images stuck in their head, Sara was already walking into the break room with dire need for coffee. To her surprise, Greg was already lazing on the couch with a forensic journal covering half of his face.

"Greg?" Sara stopped a few feet away from the couch. At her voice, Greg tore his eyes away from the journal and sat up with a cheeky grin.

"Hey Sar," He said enthusiastically. "Damn, I never thought I could beat your time in getting to work. This feels awfully good and satisfying." He crossed his arms over his stomach and leaned back with a smug grin.

"Yeah yeah whatever," Sara waved her arms in front of her and headed to the coffee machine. "Why are you so early anyway? Amy kicked you out?" She added with a hint of mischief.

"No she had to home to L.A since her mom is sick," Greg scowled with a sad face. "This sucks," He slapped his own thigh making Sara jump at the surprise reaction. She grabbed her coffee and leaned on the table, giving the younger man a questioning look. "First birthday with a serious girlfriend and she's not going to be here to celebrate it with me."

"OH YEAH," Sara slapped her forehead slightly with the information. "It's your birthday in a few hours huh?" Greg nodded enthusiastically but scowled when he saw the sarcastic smile on Sara's lips. "Seriously? She's the only serious girlfriend you have had?" She asked giving him her best 'innocent' smile.

"Well she's the only serious girlfriend I had at the time of my birthday yes," Greg bit his lips insecurely. "But I don't mind it. My birthdays had never been dull. They were always fun."

"Beautiful women, wild sex, of course they were fun," Sara rolled her eyes with a smirk just when Nick walked into the room.

"COFFEE," He headed to Sara with is arms open as if like a zombie. Sara quickly got out of his way and sat down next to an amused Greg. "Hey Greggo, what are the plans for your birthday?" Nick asked finally getting his hands on his coffee.

"Was thinking we could head to a club tomorrow night before shift?" Greg scratched his chin in thought. "Or something like that. What do you think?"

"Sounds good to me," Nicky said sitting down next to Sara who was now being squeezed by the two men. She gave them both a confused look before she got up only to be pulled down by her arms onto the couch again. "You sit missy," Nick said putting his arm around her shoulders. "You're coming with us ok?"

"Oh come on do I have to?" Sara asked slouching her shoulders.

"YES," Nick and Greg chorused together making Sara roll her eyes.

"Come on Sar, it's my birthday," Greg pouted like a little boy. "You have got to come." Sara turned her head from Nick to Greg and back to Nick again. They were both giving her their best puppy look which looked absolutely hilarious to her.

"Fine, fine," Sara raised a hand in surrender. "But I won't stay for long, deal?"

"Better than nothing," Nick said patting Sara's shoulder.

"What on earth are you two doing here so early anyway?" Sara asked, slightly annoyed with the fact that they were intruding her alone time before work.

"I have been here for a while" Nick said comfortably, sipping his coffee. "I needed to catch up with my paperwork. I procrastinated it for a so long that I started to see it in my dreams s well."

Greg started to laugh hysterically at Nick's words while Sara suppressed her urge to laugh.

"Oh dude I feel for you," Greg said howling with laughter. "Instead of beautiful women attending to you, you get paperwork drowning you even in your dreams. That's harsh."

"Shut up man," Nick turned sideways as if to hit Greg but Sara stopped him.

"Ok don't start to fight like little boys bow," Sara said to her friends just when Grissom walked into the room. "Ok seriously people, why on earth are you all coming to work so early? Is today some kind of 'come to work early and annoy Sara' day?" Sara asked with a sigh.

Grissom gave her a questioning look before he looked around. "There's no one here Sara."

"You three are," Sara mumbled softly. "Normally I get to stay here alone until it's only like 15 minutes for shift to start."

"Aren't you a pocket full of sunshine," Greg pinched Sara's check making a nerve twitch on her forehead. She gave him a glare which made him shift slightly away from her.

"Well anyway, I came here to tell you that you all can go home," Grissom said sitting down with his daily crossword puzzle. He was a bit preoccupied by it to miss the confused expressions on the faces of the three people sitting in front of him.

"Excuse me?" Sara asked wondering what kind of joke it was since she didn't understand it all.

"Ecklie decided to give the graveyard shift 3 days off since we have the highest crime solve rate," Grissom said still not making eye contact with his team. "He made arrangements for some people from days and swings to cover the shifts for us."

"So, in short we didn't need to come to work tonight?" Nick said, frowning at the thought of missing sleep for nothing.

"You can hand over your cases to the replacements and go home," Grissom finally looked up to meet the frowning faces in front of him. He gave them a confused look. "What?"

"You couldn't have called us to let us know about this?" Greg said heavily frustrated by the information.

"I just found about it too," Grissom went back to his paper making the three CSIs even more frustrated. "So just hand over your cases and enjoy your days off."

"HEY WAIT," Greg stood up quickly as if he had an epiphany. "This means we can celebrate my birthday tonight right?" He turned enthusiastically to Sara and Nick who looked nothing but bored.

"I guess," Sara waved a hand lazily while Nick yawned.

"YES," Greg jumped slightly making Grissom give him a curious look. "Hey Grissom, wanna hit a club and have some fun? My treat."

"As much as I would like to, I have some things I have to attend to tonight," Grissom said getting up. "But you all have fun." He smiled at his team and headed out. "And Greg, you're going to be one year older. Try to act your age wont you?"

"What a way to wish someone on their birthday man," Greg scratched his head and mumbled under his breath hoping Grissom didn't hear him.

"Giving someone a few words of advice is better than just saying some mere words," Grissom called from the door. "But if you like to hear it so much, happy birthday Greg."

"See that wasn't too hard now was it?" Greg said cheekily. "And thanks Grissom. You sure you don't want to come with us?"

"Some other time for sure," Grissom said before he stepped out of the door and disappeared around a corner.

Greg turned to Sara and Nick who were still comfortably sitting on the couch enjoying their coffee. Both CSIs lifted their head to meet their eyes with the younger enthusiastic ones in front of them. Before either one could say anything, Warrick and Catherine walked into the room grabbing their attention.

"Hey guys, how's it going," Warrick greeted cheerfully while Catherine just sat down quietly. Following them the rookies walked into the room making the room quite crowded.

"Oh everyone here," Greg clapped his hands together. "Ecklie gave us 3 nights off starting tonight. So hand over your cases to the replacements and then we're heading off to celebrate my birthday."

The whole room went silent, with frustration, confusion and more questions.

"Wait what?" Catherine asked curiously, not understanding everything Greg had just said. "Why's Ecklie being so generous? And why on earth weren't we told about this before we came to work?"

"Ecklie decided to be nice since we have the highest crime solve rate," Sara said with a soft smile. Her eyes were fixed on Catherine. "And according to Grissom, he just found out about this himself."

"Oh," Catherine looked over at Sara and as soon as their eyes locked, she looked away. She was sure that a hint of red appeared on her cheeks. All she could do was hope that no one else realized it. She didn't want it to happen, but all she could think about when she saw Sara was kissing her. "Well I don't mind having some time off."She said softly.

"Me neither," Warrick stretched his well built body. "So Greggo where are we going?"

"Anywhere," Greg said enthusiastically. And then he turned to the rookies who were staring at the rest of the CSIs as if they were going to eat them. "You guys are coming too right? It would be good to get to know you guys a little better."

"Clubbing? Hell yeah," Noel said excitedly.

"Sure why not," Jerry nodded with a soft smile.

"Ok," Marlon said timidly.

"Well let's go hand over our cases then," Nick stood up dragging Sara on the way. The brunette slouched her body before sighing heavily.

"Yeah," She rolled her eyes and followed her team out of the room. "This is going to be a long night." She muttered under her breath. The only one who heard her words were the blonde who was following her closely.

_Yeah, a very long one,_ Catherine thought to herself while her dream occupied all of her thoughts. While a part of her didn't want it, there was another part in her that was actually enjoying it.

"How confusing," She mumbled to herself before following her team, specifically a tall brunette.

* * *

The club was loud and crowded. Two things Sara hated most in the world were loud noises that didn't make sense and people crowning around her. She had taken refuge in the corner of the booth all of them were sitting in. But at the moment the only people at the table beside her were Catherine and Marlon. The rest were on the dance floor enjoying themselves with several drinks already in them.

While Sara played with the glass in her hand, Catherine was drowning several tequila shots that were sitting in front of her. Marlon just kept staring at the blonde who smiled at him comfortingly. But Sara was giving Catherine a curious look, as if she was worried about her. She couldn't help but notice that Catherine was avoiding her, making sure that they didn't maintain eye contact for more than a few seconds. Sara couldn't help wonder whether she had done something to offend the blonde. But to her recollection, she had done nothing of such sort.

Just then, Noel came to the table half drunk and very much flushed. He was surely having fun.

"Hey aren't you guys going to dance?" He grabbed a shot glass and drowned it with one gulp. Everyone at the table shook their heads and his eyes fell on the blonde. "Come on Catherine, let's dance. It's fun."

"No thanks," Catherine shook her head without smiling. "I don't dance." She saw Sara snigger from the side at which she licked her lips.

"Oh come on, of course you do," Noel insisted. But the blonde just shook her head again. "Please? Just one dance."

"She said no," Sara said in her stern voice grabbing Noel's attention. His flirtatious smile changed to a soft scowl.

"Fine," He ran his hand through his hair and turned to Marlon. "Come on buddy, let's go have some fun."

"No no, I'm fine here," Marlon insisted but Noel grabbed him by the hand and dragged him to the dance floor leaving Catherine and Sara alone.

Sara turned to Catherine who was just sitting, lost in her thoughts. Deciding that the blonde was not going to start talking, Sara decided that she might as well start a conversation.

"Something bothering you Cath?" She asked softly taking a sip off her drink.

"Nope," Catherine managed a smile but she made sure that she didn't look at Sara. She didn't want to be stuck with that same rush of butterflies in her stomach anytime she saw Sara's lips. Whether it was the alcohol, the dream or something else, she was finding it hard to stop herself from thinking about Sara all night long.

"Ok," Sara said, not convinced at all with her words. Her gaze moved from Catherine to the dance floor. She didn't see any of her friends due to the big crowd. Instead, her eyes fell on a woman sitting at the bar. The girl was beautiful with black hair and attractive eyes which were so familiar. Just then the girl turned in her chair flashing the whole club an irresistible smile. Sara's eyes grew wide.

_She looks so much like her. _She thought to herself. With that, her mind filled with thoughts she didn't want to occupy her head, not at the moment. Sara closed her eyes and shook her head before grabbing a glass in front of her. She needed to get those imaged out of her head. Sara didn't even realize that she shot down about five tequila shot until a hand grabbed her wrist.

"What happened to you all of a sudden?" Catherine's soft voice reached her ears making Sara open her eyes. She turned around to see that Catherine was sitting a lot closer than she was before. And her eyes were filled with concern.

Sara just shook her head and gulped down another shot before Catherine grabbed both her hands.

"I think you've had enough Sar," Catherine said courteously. "Tell me, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," Sara shook her head again. "It's nothing." Catherine turned the brunette's head towards her, cupping the younger woman's face.

"Don't lie to me," Catherine shifted closer to the brunette. Sara gulped a lump in her throat.

_Ok, why on earth is my heart beating so fast? _Sara asked herself while her body eyes were locked with Catherine but they gazed down the blonde's face, stopping at her lips for a minute and down to her neck and back to her eyes. _Wow, she's beautiful. Her eyes, her lips…they are so…tempting. _

Involuntarily, Sara shook her head clearing the thoughts out of her head.

"Sara?" Catherine's voice brought Sara back from her haze. "Please tell me what's wrong? Are you ok?"

_Her breath feels good on my lips. _Sara's mind was on overdrive. _Why the hell am I being drawn to Catherine all of a sudden? _

"You're scaring me a little Sar," Catherine's grip on Sara's cheeks tightened.

Without thinking, Sara grabbed the blonde's hands and put them on her lips, their fingers entwined with each other's.

_Her hands feel just right in my hands. _Sara thought, licking her lips subconsciously. _And why haven't I noticed her intoxicating fragrance before?_

"Sweetie, will you please say something?" Catherine pulled herself even closer to Sara, her own heart beating fast with anticipation and fear as well. Her eyes were refusing to stop from taking quick glances at Sara's tempting lips that were practically inches from hers.

"You're beautiful Cath," Sara said in a mere whisper. Her voice was so low and husky. Catherine was sure that her heart skipped a beat somewhere when the brunette whispered those words.

"What?" Catherine had to make sure that she heard it right. It might be her mind playing tricks on you because of the alcohol.

"I said…" Sara put a hand on Catherine's cheek and squeezed slightly. "You. are. beautiful." She said stopping after every word.

Catherine took in a sharp intake of breath when Sara's thumb ran over her lips. And the next thing Catherine knew was that the brunette's wet lips were pressed on her dry ones, kissing her softly. Catherine felt as if she was floating back into her dream. It was exactly the same; soft, passionate and full of care. It was a moment of complete bliss. And all she could do about it was just kiss the brunette back with everything she had.

* * *

**Well there you go...lemme no what you think, whether you liked it or not...a few words would do ;)**

**thanks for reading**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

**Ok its been a while and i apologize for leaving you all hanging for so long. but i have quite good reasons some of them being a very bad writer's block, college, lack of sleep and life itself. hopefully i will update regularly now that the writer's block has been lifted. thank u for the lovely reviews, glad u guys like it. well read on...**

**for u baby...**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1....ENJOY and review pls...**

* * *

Sara opened her eyes groggily to immediately shut them due to the sunlight that hit directly on her eyes, blinding her temporarily. She lifted a hand to cover her eyelids to protect her eyes from the harsh bright light, numbly wondering why there was that much light in her room. Normally her room wasn't filled with bright rays of the sun so why today?

Then she heard a loud knock on the door which felt like someone was hitting on her head with a hammer. There was someone outside the door asking her something but she could barely register what the person was saying since it felt like her ears were stuffed with something. She opened her mouth to tell whoever was outside the door to leave her alone but her mouth was far too dry.

She opened her eyes again cautious than before. She focused her eyes straight on the ceiling of her bedroom. She frowned when she saw that it wasn't the design she was familiar to. This ceiling was covered in a light shade of violet, with a lighter shade of brush strokes over it. Her ceiling used to be plain white, and it was much more calming.

Why wasn't she in her room? More accurately, where was she? She turned her head slightly, ignoring the pain that rushed through her body. Her eyes caught the sight of a wardrobe, little study table, armchair and a bathroom that was not hers. The whole room was colored in violet with white patterns running over all the edges of the wall. And then her eyes caught a picture frame on the table. It was two blondes, one shorter than the other but both almost looked identical.

'_Oh...' _She thought as the realization struck.

It was Catherine's room. A soft smile curved on her lips when she was clear with that piece of the information. But then the thought confused her more. What the hell was she doing sleeping in Catherine's room? What the hell happened? Where the hell was Catherine? Her irritation increased when she realized that she had no recollection of ever entering Catherine's room. She raked through her mind, trying to past the almost excruciating headache to remember what had happened. But her mind came up with nothing but more headaches.

The last thing Sara could remember was being squashed to the corner seat of the bar, watching people drink and dance around like tomorrow, all the while avoiding the number of shots in front of her and wondering why Catherine was acting weird.

'_Oh yeah, Catherine was acting weird_,' She scratched her chin lazily.

But after that it was all blank. Now she had a bad hangover and she could not understand how she got it in the first place. Her whole body was heavy which irritated her. She tried to get out of the bed and find Catherine, hoping she would have the answers for her questions. But before she could move, something beside her made her whole body stiffen.

Somebody had moved next to her. Sara felt smooth skin touch her waist and a small hand wrapped over her stomach, right below her breasts. She looked down on her body to get even more confused. Through her confusion of how she got there, Sara hadn't realized before that she was completely naked. And now, the additional piece of information was that she was probably sleeping with an equally naked person with whom she probably had sex with. Her heart started to beat way faster than it was supposed to and with a scared look in her eyes, she slowly looked down and all of a sudden, all the air left her lungs.

All she could see was the back of a either a very beautiful woman or a very feminine man. And all of a sudden, the body moved and Sara felt firm breasts pressed against her, nipples so erect that she felt chills on her body. It was definitely a woman. The woman was partially on top of her, her head resting on the side of her breasts, her blonde hair splayed over her own face, hiding it from Sara's view. Her heart was racing even faster. Could it be?

Deciding to be bold, Sara ran her finger over the woman's face and pulled the hair behind her ears. This time, all the air in her lungs did escape her mouth in one swift moment. Then the second realization hit. It surprised her that it took her this long to actually realize it. Sara could not believe that the hair or the body had not given it away in the first place; the fact that the equally naked 'someone' in bed with her was none other than Catherine.

"Oh…my …nooo…" She quickly jumped away, rolling the blonde away from her. Her back hit the floor with a loud thud while she heard a groan from the bed.

"Who's being loud?" Catherine asked as groggily as Sara felt at the moment. Sara decided to stay on the floor, her hands covering her mouth hoping Catherine would go back to sleep. But to her discomfort, Catherine's head became visible from the bed when she peeped down at the floor. Her eyes were squinted, probably to cover them from the sunlight. But as soon as she saw Sara laying on the floor, with her eyes wide open, hands covering her mouth and nothing but the corner of the sheets covering her waist down, the blonde quickly sat up.

"Sara," Her eyes grew wide, with no hint of sleepiness or hangover reflecting in them. "What are you doing here? Where are your clothes?"

"You tell me," Sara's voice came muffled since she hadn't taken her hands off her mouth.

"How the hell am I supposed to know?" Catherine raised her arms and ran through her hair, confused, shocked and somewhat scared as well.

Neither woman spoke for a few minutes after that, since they were both trying to remember what had actually happened the previous night. But neither Sara nor Catherine seemed to have any idea how they both ended up in bed. All of a sudden, Catherine pulled on the sheet that was covering Sara's waist down exposing the brunette's slim body. Sara heard Catherine took in a deep breath with the sight of her and she felt herself blushing at the blonde's reaction. Deciding that she really needed to cover at least some of her body, she tried to look for some kind of clothing. From the corner of her eyes Sara saw her pants at the end of the bed and quickly pulled it towards her and put them on hastily. She was feeling a little self conscious since Catherine was staring at her while she did so.

"So we…urm…did we…I mean…urrr…you and i…urm we slept together?" Catherine scratched her head while she wrapped the sheet around her body and got out of bed.

Sara gulped down a lump in her throat. She wanted to say no. But the mark on Catherine's neck and how damp she still felt between her legs, she knew that she would be lying if she said no. So she just nodded and looked around the room, trying to find her other garments. She was feeling quite exposed in just her pants.

"Now what?" Catherine asked, forcing Sara to turn towards her. Catherine was still staring at her, namely her chest and was biting her lips. Sara couldn't help but want to tell her how sexy she looked at the moment but she resisted that temptation.

"What do you mean?" Sara asked, her voice sounding very croaky.

Catherine gave Sara an unbelieving look and shook her head. "I mean, what is going to happen between us now?"

Catherine saw Sara gulp down visibly. And she was refusing to move her arms from over her chest, which to Catherine looked a bit too inviting for her own good.

"I don't know," Sara shrugged with a blank look on her face.

"You don't know?" Catherine frowned heavily making Sara bite her lips nervously.

"Yeah I don't, I mean what am I supposed to say?" Sara finally took her arms away from her chest and threw them in the air in her defense.

"At least something," Catherine stepped closer to Sara who backed away. "I mean, I think when friends end up in bed together they need to talk afterwards Sara."

Sara shifted her weight from one left to another. "What are we supposed to talk about?"

"I don't know, I have never slept with a friend before," Catherine scratched her head. "But I guess we are supposed to talk how it's going to be between us now?"

"Right," Sara frowned heavily. She raked through her mind to find something to say to the blonde but at the moment her mind was refusing to process thoughts. She didn't know that she was scrunching her face with thought for almost a minute or more before Catherine spoke again.

"Do you have any idea how we ended up together last night? Or why?" Catherine asked timidly.

"No," Sara said avoiding the blonde's eyes. "I don't know how the hell this happen. I mean how did we end up in bed? This isn't cool." Sara kept on mumbling to herself.

"Come on Sara," Catherine said in a hopeless tone. "Is things going to be weird between us now?"

Sara sighed heavily. "I don't know how we ended up in bed Cath because to be frank I don't see either of us having a reason to sleep with each other," Sara shrugged not thinking what she was saying. Catherine wanted to take offense in the brunette's words but she decided to let it pass, just this once.

"I think alcohol played a big role there, though I don't remember drinking that much," Sara continued, running both her hands through her hair. Catherine sniggered when the image of Sara drowning the tequila shots came to her mind. But at the moment she didn't care. She just wanted to listen to the woman in front of her, who looked as if she had temporarily forgotten the fact that her upper body was completely exposed. "I love being your friend. I don't want this to ruin it. And I don't think just this can lead us to be something more than friends either."

"I don't want it either," Catherine spoke but Sara opened her mouth again, silently asking Catherine to let her finish.

"It's not that you aren't a beautiful woman, if the situation was different I would take your hand and ask you to be my girlfriend with no hesitance," Sara put her hands in the pockets of her pants. "But I'm not ready for something like that. And I don't think you are either."

Catherine nodded and broke eye contact with Sara, her mind filling up with questions. Had something happened to Sara that made the brunette so scared of relationships?

"So why don't we just let this pass by, and be just the same as we were yesterday? Because I really love having you as my friend. It's new to me, and I don't want to let go of it," Sara asked, hope twinkling in her eyes. Catherine was still looking down on the floor, shifting her weight from one leg to another making Sara a bit anxious. The brunette gave the blonde a few minutes before she took in a deep breath. "Which is why it would be great if you said something right about now?"

Catherine quickly looked up to meet the eyes of a very nervous Sara who looked as if she would burst out with anxiety any minute now.

"Sure," Catherine smiled. "Plus it's not like we remember anything to even worry about it. If we did there might have been a problem of wanting more. But we don't so I think it's good."

"Yeah," Sara scratched her head uneasily. "But I don't think it was that bad."

"Oh I can say it wasn't bad," Catherine stretched slightly. "I feel really good."

Sara nodded, biting her lips. She hadn't had any sort of sexual release in months and truth be told, she felt relieved. To be put blunt, she felt quite satisfied. A part of her actually wanted to remember what they did that night. But she decided to ignore that side of her. Catherine saw the brunette totally lost in her thoughts, her eyes unfocused and her tongue running over her lips every now and then. She looked quite beautiful. Catherine quickly brushed the thought away and cleared her throat innocently.

"So we're good?" Catherine asked making sure they were on the same page.

"Yes we are," Sara nodded finally letting her lips curve to a genuine smile. And then a chill ran up her spine and she shivered. "Do you by any chance know where my clothes are? I'm feeling kind of chilly now."

"I seriously have no idea honey, but let's find them shall we?" Catherine turned around and walked to the other side of the bed. She bent down and picked up Sara's shirt and bra and threw it at the brunette. She watched Sara get dressed while she sat down and roamed her eyes through the room to find the clothes she herself had worn that night. She turned her head to see Sara put the shirt over her head.

"Better?" Catherine asked at which Sara nodded. Her eyes caught a red patch visible beneath the collar of Sara's shirt. "Sorry about that." She ran her finger over her own collarbone.

"About what?" Sara asked trying to straighten her hair but failing miserably. She saw Catherine point at her collarbone. She hurried to the mirror which stood nearby and examined her neck. There, right below her collarbone, was a very visible and painful looking bite mark. She ran her hand over the mark and turned to Catherine. "Were you trying to eat me?" She smirked at the blonde who turned a bright shade of red.

"Sorry, I tend to give 'getting caught up in the moment' a new meaning sometimes," Catherine turned away from Sara.

"It's alright," Sara said with a soft chuckle turning back to check her reflection from the mirror.

Sara fixed herself up as best as she could while she was in front of the mirror and turned again to Catherine who was still facing away from her. Catherine's back was visible and since the blonde had pulled her hair onto her chest over her shoulders, her neck was clearly visible to Sara as well. A sudden urge surged through Sara making her want to grab the blonde from behind and kiss her neck. Sara quickly brushed the thought away reasoning that it was the after effects of the night they spent together.

Before Sara could say anything, there was a knock on the door again just like before. This time Sara was able to make out Lindsey's voice behind the door. All of a sudden she felt really awkward being in Catherine's room. What would the younger blonde think of her mother spending the night with her? A woman?

And then another thought hit her. How was it that the blonde didn't get freaked by the fact that she had just slept with a woman? To her knowledge, Catherine was a straight woman who only dated men. Then why hadn't the issue of Sara being a woman become a problem with her? And above all, Sara was getting a bit more frustrated for not realizing this critical point in their little encounter a bit earlier.

"Mom, you up?" Lindsey knocked again. The headache of both women inside the room seemed to increase with each knock which was probably why Catherine hurried to open the door. Catherine opened the door without thinking, completely forgetting that the only piece of clothing covering her body was the sheets wrapped around her.

"What is it?" She asked softly yet rudely.

"I just wanted to give you your clothes you left downstairs and on the staircase," Lindsey's voice came from behind the door. Sara was very glad that the girl decided not to come into the room. "The next time you bring someone home for your weird little sexual encounters, please keep it in your room so that I won't have to explain to my friends why my mother's clothes and undergarments are all over the house."

Now Sara felt even more awkward. She had no idea that the two Willows had that much heat going between them. Sure it was obvious that the mother-daughter had their issues, but somehow Sara never could picture Lindsey talking like that to Catherine. That was until now.

She saw Catherine take her clothes with her free hand and throw it into the room. Sara caught a glance of the blonde's face to see a mixture of anger, pain and embarrassment in her eyes.

"Thank you for the advice," Catherine said, this time with no softness in her voice. "How come I didn't know that your friends are going to be over today?" She asked in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Because you forgot? I told you that they were coming today to fetch me to go to the mall," Lindsey said in the same harsh voice. "We are waiting for Raven to show up and then we are leaving." Sara saw Catherine open her mouth to say something but Lindsey beat her to it. "I will be back by dinner. That's if you're going to be around." Lindsey's voice came from a bit far telling Sara that the girl was heading away from the room.

Sure enough, Catherine closed the door with a beaten look on her face. She turned to Sara who stood by the mirror with her hands in her pockets and a sympathetic look on her face.

"Sorry you had to hear that," Catherine tried to smile but failed.

"It's ok," Sara tried sound as sweet and comforting as she could. "Kids can be a handful at times especially teenagers. Nothing anyone does is good enough for them," Surprisingly, it actually made Catherine chuckle. "What?" Sara asked trying to figure out what was so funny in what she said.

"You talking about kids is sort of funny," Catherine shrugged. "It's not because I think that you can't take care of a child or anything. But you just don't seem like you have handled even one kid ever in your life."

"I haven't," Sara nodded with a soft smile. "I'm just saying something I hear a lot from all around."

"It's a good thing trust me," Catherine ran her hand over her forehead. "Teenagers can be so tiring. I swear Lindsey scares me at time. I just hope she doesn't do something stupid."

Sara sighed and stepped closer to Catherine. She was now standing about two feet away from the blonde. Catherine looked into Sara's concerned filled eyes and couldn't help but just stare at them.

"They are tiring now but they will grow up, we all do," Sara said shrugging slightly. "Linds is at the age where they try to explore every single thing they see. They are naïve and frankly stupid," Sara took another step closer to Catherine.

"But they'll grow up and when their mindset matures, they see what the world is all about. Then they become these wonderful people who are responsible and people who take care of you," Sara placed a hand on Catherine's cheek.

"I know that right now you feel like Linds is like she's going to abandon you any minute, but there's no doubt that she loves you. She's just going through a rebellious phase. She'll get over it, actually she'll get tired of it," Sara ran her thumb over Catherine's cheek bone making the blonde push her face into Sara's hand.

"Come to think of it, she's being rebellious because she loves you. She just wants your attention. So push those regrets and paranoia out of your mind," Sara slightly patted on Catherine's cheek. "She's your daughter. She's going to be just fine."

When she stopped talking Sara was standing inches from the blonde, the tip of their noses almost touching. Both of them felt their breath on each other's lips making their heart beat faster. Catherine's eyes were closed shut while Sara's was half closed, taking in the moment entirely. Before Sara could do anything, she felt Catherine's lips pressing against hers. But she didn't do anything. She just let the blonde press her lips against hers while she allowed her brain to process what was happening.

'_Catherine's kissing me. She's kissing me. Actually she's not kissing me, she's just feeling up my lips with hers,' _Sara mind started to go on overdrive while she tried to hold her composure.

'_What should I do? I should back off. No, that might hurt her. Maybe I should kiss her back. But then it might give her the wrong impression,' _Sara tried to reason out her thoughts while she ignored the rapid beat of her heart.

'_I mean friends just don't go around kissing each other anytime they are alone now right? Or do they? Maybe the rules have changed, who knows?' _The brunette opened her eyes to see that Catherine had not moved. Her eyes were still closed, her lips still pressed against hers and her hands still clutching on the sheet wrapped around her.

'_What's the harm in kissing her? I have already slept with her and she didn't have that much of a problem with it now did she?' _Someone inside of her spoke in a bit more confident tone. '_So I kiss her, and she takes the wrong impression. What if she does? Is that such a bad thing? She's a wonderful woman.'_

'_Sure she is but I am not ready for something like that, not yet,' _Sara stated to herself. She gathered all the courage in her to back off from Catherine when the blonde ran her lips over Sara's lips before softly sucking on the brunette's lower lips. Sara couldn't help but let herself give in to the emotions that filled in her.

'_Fuck it, it's just a kiss. It's not like we're going to end up in bed again,' _Sara said to herself before she moved her lips slightly to reciprocate to the kiss. But before she could make any move, there was a loud knock on the door which made Catherine to back away from the brunette hastily.

"We're leaving," Lindsey said a bit loudly, probably to ensure that Catherine heard her. "I'll see you tonight mom. Bye."

"Okay, be careful," Catherine called and turned back to Sara who was licking her own lips, avoiding her eyes. Catherine gulped down the lump in her throat.

'_Shit, what the hell have I done?'_ Every ounce of reasoning in her was telling her that she was doomed.

'_Did I actually think that just because we have had sex, it's ok to kiss her?'_ Catherine wanted to kick herself. '_That it was harmless?'_

'_No, that wasn't it,'_ Catherine bit her lip. _'It was her being all sweet and sensitive that made me do it. She draws it out of me.'_

'_Oh great, blame her,'_ She said to herself again. '_She didn't even kiss you back you idiot. Now fix it or else she's going to run away from you.'_

"I'm sorry Sara, I don't know what came over me," Catherine shook her head, returning back to reality from her thoughts.

"It's ok," Sara bit her lips and took in a deep breath. All of a sudden all she wanted was some time to escape from her own mind. "Well now Linds is gone so I probably should get going too." She suggested quickly.

"Yeah, I should take a shower too," Catherine nodded, shifting on her spot softly. "But I'm still sorry." She added making Sara finally looked into her eyes again.

"It's ok, happens," Sara nodded and headed to the door. But something in her made her divert her steps and head to Catherine. She wrapped an arm around the blonde's neck. "I'll see you later. Call me if you need anything." She said softly.

"Ok," Catherine mumbled onto Sara's shoulders.

And again, Sara surprised herself. Before she backed away from Catherine, she found herself taking in a deep breath, filling her senses with the scent of Catherine's hair. She didn't know why she did it, but all she knew was that she really badly wanted to do it.

"Bye," Sara quickly turned away and headed out of the room without waiting for Catherine's reply. She closed the door behind it and leaned on it, cursing her actions.

'_Why the hell did I smell her hair? But damn she smells good. God what the fuck is wrong with me? ' _She asked herself before smacking her forehead and hurrying down the stairs and out the door, to her car parked outside. While she drove off all she could think of was the blonde she left upstairs, alone and probably a little bit confused.

While upstairs, Catherine stood at the spot she stood few minutes ago lost in thoughts. '_Did she just smell my hair?' _She asked herself, biting her fingers. '_What the hell was that?'_

While each of them had their own concerns, one similar thought conquered both their mind.

'_It's not going to be easy to get her out of my mind now is it? Damn, what kind of hole have I fallen into?' _

Letting that thoughts wash over their senses, Sara drove back to her apartment while Catherine stepped into the shower. They both knew that what's meant to happen will happen; they would just have to deal with it making sure they don't ruin their very fragile and new relationship.

And to their dismay, as their hangover started to pass, bits and memories of the previous night started to come rushing back making the job of not thinking about each other even harder.

"Great, just great,"…

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**i know this chapter might be a bit disappointing but i promise it's going to get better soon...lemme know what you think coz it always helps...just a few words will do :)  
**

**thanks for reading**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

**I'm quite proud of myself for finishing this chapter so fast. I hope i did some justice to it. Oh just fyi, this chapter's quite sexual. Thanks for the reviews guys...means a lot...well enjoy the chapter**

**For you my baby, i miss u...**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1...ENJOY and review pls**

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Catherine poured herself the third cup of the day within the last hour and sat down on her couch. She turned on the television and ruffled through the channels until she stopped at the National Geographic Channel which was showing some show called 'Lost in Nevada Jungle'. She tried to engross herself in what was being shown on the television but her mind was being dragged by the events of the previous night. She took a sip off the coffee and closed her eyes as she threw her head back.

_It was Sara who pulled away from the kiss first. Catherine expected to have a frown or a confused look on the brunette's face but to her surprise, she was smiling and licking her lips enthusiastically. She couldn't believe how sexy that sight was. Sara leaned forward again, stopping inches from the blonde's face again. _

"_I like kissing you," The brunette said in the same husky voice, with a giggle escaping her lips at the same time. _

"_Sar…" Catherine opened her mouth, still mesmerized by the moment. But before she could say anything else Sara closed the gap between them, kissing her again. With no hesitance, Catherine reciprocated allowing access to Sara's eager tongue into her mouth. Sara's hands made their way to Catherine's waist, pushing them inside the blonde's shirt and caressing her skin. Catherine hissed onto Sara's lips when her hands moved up, cupping her breasts over her bra. _

"_Let's go home," Sara mumbled onto Catherine's lips all the while playing with the blonde's breast. She was not allowing Catherine to think rationally with her movements. Catherine nodded into their kiss making Sara get up, pulling Catherine along with her. "Your place?"_

"_Sure," Catherine quickly got out of the booth, with Sara following her with their hands entwined with each other. Neither of them bothered to inform their colleagues that they were leaving. All they could care about at the moment was to get to a place where they could be alone together. _

"_Cab?" Catherine asked. It was amusing how they were only able to talk using just one word. _

"_I'll drive," Sara said leading their way to her car. _

"_You're drunk," Catherine pointed out. _

"_I can function just fine even when I'm drunk," Sara said and turned her head to face the blonde. "Trust me."_

"_But…" Catherine wanted to argue. She really didn't want to break another law in just 2 days. But before she could say anything else, Sara's lips crashed onto hers making her stop from thinking yet again. "I guess there's no harm. My house isn't far anyway."_

"_Yeah," Sara hummed onto the blonde's lips before she turned around and pulled Catherine to her car. _

_Sure enough within almost 5 minutes, both of them were stumbling into Catherine's house. As soon as Catherine locked the door behind her, Sara pinned her to the door and started to kiss her while her hands roamed all over Catherine's body. Sara broke their kiss just enough to take off Catherine's shirt and throwing it over her shoulders. Catherine pushed the brunette to the living room while Sara unclasped the blonde's bra and let it fall to their feet. _

_Sara pushed the blonde onto the couch with her on top and kissed her as passionately and with need as before. Her hands started to roam over Catherine's exposed torso, running circles around her belly button and slithering her hands upwards. Catherine moaned loudly onto Sara's lips when Sara's hands cupped her breasts, her thumb running over her already hardened nipples. Sara took her time, torturing the blonde by teasing her nipples and kissing her passionately before she pulled away from Catherine's lips and sucked down the blonde's jaw line to her neck. How Sara knew where to suck Catherine couldn't understand. All she knew was that the brunette knew just what to do to make her moan loudly and mumble sweet nonsense into the night. Catherine wrapped her legs around Sara's waist and ran her hand through Sara's hair while the brunette sucked her way down to Catherine's nipples, leaving very visible marks on her neck. _

"_Do you want me to stop?" Sara lifted her head and asked before she ran her tongue over Catherine's nipple. _

"_God no," Catherine heaved her chest upwards trying to get Sara to do more than just tease her. _

_Sara smiled and wrapped her lips around the blonde's nipples sucking on it softly. Her own arousal increased when Catherine started to softly grind her core against her stomach. And Catherine's moans were not helping her much either. Sara let her free fingers play teasingly with Catherine's free nipple while her tongue lashed and flicked its twin. Catherine's moans became even louder when Sara increased the pressure on her nipple and started to softly nibble on it. She knew she was wet beyond words at the moment and she really needed Sara to stop teasing her. She grabbed a fistful of Sara's hair and softly lifted her head. _

"_Don't tease me," She said sternly making Sara grin. The brunette pulled her body up, kissing Catherine deeply. She quickly undid the buttons of Catherine's pants and pulled them down with the help of the blonde who threw it over the couch. _

_Sara once again sucked her way down from Catherine's neck to her nipples, twisting her tongue over the hard nub. Her hand slithered down Catherine's well toned stomach to between her legs, pressing her fingers on Catherine's core over her panties. _

"_Yes," Catherine hissed and pushed herself on Sara's hands. _

Just then the doorbell rang. Catherine opened her eyes with a jolt and sighed heavily. She saw that while one of her hands was in her hair, the other was lazily teasing her nipples over her shirt. She gulped down and sat up, shaking the thoughts away from her mind. The doorbell rang again, making her even more frustrated. She wasn't dressed for company, and to be frank she was quite a bit aroused. But whoever was at the door didn't go away. They kept ringing the doorbell until she swore loudly and headed to the door.

Catherine threw the door open to meet the charming face of Warrick who was grinning away mischievously. Part of her was angry that he was intruding her alone time but at the same time, his smile did make her smile as well.

"Hey sweetness," Warrick stepped in the house and headed to the living room without waiting for Catherine. The blonde closed the door and followed him to the living room where he had made himself comfortable in the couch. He was now surfing through the channels trying to find something appealing for him.

"Warrick, what are you doing here?" Catherine asked confused as to why Warrick was at her house in the afternoon.

"I'm here to pick you up," Warrick said with his smile. Catherine just gave him another confused look.

While Warrick explained to Catherine why and where they were going, Sara was trying to take a nap in her apartment. But she was failing miserably. Her couch had always been the perfect place for her to spend her afternoons napping but today it was working against her. Laying on the couch on her stomach, all she could think was how she had spent a wonderful time with Catherine on her couch.

"_Yes," Sara heard Catherine whisper into the night as the blonde pushed herself on Sara's hands. _

_Sara looked up to Catherine's head thrown back, her chest heaved up making sure that her nipples were in contact with Sara's mouth. The sight was beautiful. All Sara could was stare at the blonde filled with ecstasy as she moved her fingers, rubbing her over her panties. She couldn't register why she was doing this but Sara knew that she wanted this really badly at the moment. She pulled away from Catherine's nipples and licked her way down to Catherine's thighs, pulling down the blonde's panties out of the way. She sat up, taking in the view of the very beautiful woman trapped under her. Catherine gave her a questioning look to which she smiled. _

_Sara bent down and placed a quick kiss on Catherine's lips before she went back to the blonde's nipples, nibbling away on the very hardened nub. Sara's hand started to laze circles on Catherine's inner thigh right below where Catherine actually wanted her hand. Sara was very much enjoying her little teases on Catherine's body. Why wouldn't she? The reaction to it by Catherine was absolutely mind blowing. When Sara had satisfied her need to give all the attention she wanted to give to Catherine's nipples, she ran her tongue down Catherine's torso to between her legs, sending goose bumps all over Catherine's body. Sara kissed Catherine's inner thigh, running her tongue up and down the blonde's smooth skin. _

"_Sara please…" Catherine moaned loudly making Sara quite smug. She always liked to take someone to the edge of release and make them wait. And she noted that with Catherine, it was very sexy. _

_Sara finally feeling sympathetic towards the blonde ran her tongue down Catherine's length making the blonde moan out more loudly into the room. She ran her tongue back to Catherine's clit and flicked it with her tongue. Catherine pressed herself more onto Sara's face. But just then, they heard some noise from upstairs. Catherine quickly got up from the couch throwing Sara off balance. _

"_Lindsey's probably still awake," Catherine whispered and checked the clock. "Come let's go to my room." She grabbed Sara's hand and pulled the brunette along. Along the way, Catherine's pants caught her feet and she threw it away on the staircase before hurrying upstairs. _

_As soon as they got into the room, Catherine ripped Sara's clothes off her body and kissed her forcefully. Without giving her any notice, Sara pushed a finger into Catherine's very wet opening making the blonde pull away from the kiss and groan loudly. _

"_We should get to the bed," Sara mumbled onto Catherine's neck, pulling her finger out of Catherine slowly and pushing it deep inside her again. _

"_Uh….yeah," Catherine moaned and tried to move but Sara's movements stopped her. Sara quickly wrapped her free arm around Catherine's waist and slightly lifted the smaller woman, letting Catherine wrap her legs around her waist and her arms around Sara's neck. "You're strong," Catherine managed to say with amusement in between her moans. _

"_Gym helps," Sara said softly before she pushed Catherine onto the bed and going straight between Catherine's legs. She didn't have the will power to go slow anymore._

_Catherine's moans got louder and more persistent as Sara's tongue found her clit. Sara pulled her finger out of Catherine before she pushed it in with an additional finger, harder into the blonde. And then she didn't stop. She fucked Catherine fast while sucking on her clit. Catherine matched Sara's thrusts while her hand found one of her nipples and twisted then between her own fingers. It didn't take long for Catherine to tighten around Sara's fingers and orgasm with a loud groan. Sara continued her actions, riding Catherine through her orgasm making it last as long as it could. _

_When Catherine's breathing became normal, Sara pulled her body up and kissed Catherine deeply. But she made sure that her fingers stayed inside the blonde. She softly started to move her fingers in and out of Catherine again making Catherine grab on her shoulders and suck on her neck. Sara's hands maintained a steady rhythm as she thrust her fingers faster into the blonde making her grit her teeth in pleasure. Sara's movements became deeper which made the blonde bite painfully on her neck. Sara's lips took one of Catherine's erect nipple in between them while she teased the other nipple in between her fingers. Sara heard Catherine's breathing becoming shallow again, her moans becoming louder and her walls tightening around her fingers. She pressed her thumb over the blonde's clit as she rode her through the wave of orgasm that hit Catherine yet again. _

_Catherine tried to calm down when Sara pulled her fingers out of her. But the brunette kept on nibbling and pinching her nipples making it almost impossible for her. Clearly Sara wasn't done yet. She smiled when Sara trailed her tongue down between her legs again. She sat up and opened her legs slightly wider when Sara started licking her clit lightly. The brunette's hands slithered up Catherine's stomach, leaving a trace of her own cum on her body, stopping on her breasts. She ran her fingers around the erect buds, pinching them almost painfully. Sara's tongue ran circles around Catherine's clit, not touching it as she licked hungrily on the older woman's core. The tip of her tongue barely entered Catherine but it slipped out just as fast as it entered. Catherine felt her orgasm building up with the brunette's teasing and she held Sara's hand which was teasing her nipples and squeezed her own nipples over Sara's hand. Taking it as a cue, Sara wrapped her lips around Catherine's clit, flicking the bundle of nerves fast and teasingly making the blonde come in an instant. Catherine felt as if her body was charged with electric shocks as she bucked her hips onto Sara's mouth, letting the rush of her orgasm run through her body again._

_Catherine dropped onto the bed on her back, drained out of almost all her energy. Sara pulled her mouth away from Catherine's clit and kissed Catherine softly. She slipped her tongue into the blonde's open mouth and let her taste herself and clean her own cum off Sara's lip before the brunette moved her head down and sucked Catherine's nipple, licking all of the blonde's cum she had left on it. She kissed Catherine again and smiled when Catherine's arms and legs wrapped around her. _

"_Wow," Catherine sighed heavily onto Sara's lips making the brunette smile smugly. _

"_Good, you should feel like that now," Sara smiled and tried to get off Catherine but she held her firmly on top of her. _

"_Now let's see if I can make you feel like that huh?" She smiled and cupped Sara's face, pressing their lips together again. She flipped the brunette over and straddled her, letting her wet core touch Sara's stomach. _

"_Hmmmm…." Sara moaned while she was getting pinned to the bed. Catherine bit the brunette's lips before she went down, sucking on her neck softly. Catherine placed her warm mouth on Sara's awaiting nipples making the brunette hum loudly. Sara moaned loudly into the night when Catherine ran her tongue over her nipple. She cupped the brunette's free breasts in her hands, playfully running her thumb over her nipple. Catherine pulled her mouth away from Sara's nipple kissing the brunette again. She pinched Sara's nipples in between her fingers while her free hand slithered down in between her legs. She pushed Sara's legs apart and placed her fingers on her clit. _

"_Do you want me to stop?" Catherine repeated Sara's question. _

"_Oh god…no…don't…" Sara groaned loudly and Catherine started to rub her clit in between her fingers. The blonde let her fingers tease with her opening while she enjoyed sucking Sara's nipples and playing with her clit. _

Sara's head lifted up with a jolt as the doorbell rang loudly into the apartment. Her breathing was heavier and sweat was breaking from her forehead. She sat up to see that she had been grabbing her pillow quite tight, wrinkling it badly. She ran her fingers through her hair and took in a deep breath.

"I hate it when memories come back like that," Sara groaned before the doorbell rang again. "I'm coming," She shouted at the door.

After straightening her tank top and boxers, she opened the door to see Nick standing there with his usual smile.

"What are you doing here?" She asked slightly annoyed.

"We're going to San Francisco," Nick stepped into the apartment, closing the door behind him.

Sara stepped back and crossed her arms over her stomach giving the man a very confused look. "So why are you at MY apartment?"

"The 49ers are playing Rams day after tomorrow," Nick said in a 'you-didn't-know?' kind of tone. Sara raised an eyebrow again, silently asking why it was her problem. "49ers is Greg's favorite team. Me and Rick got tickets for the three of us for his birthday." Nick sat down on the couch making himself comfortable. "And since we all got time off, we thought we would take you and Catherine with us too. We already got extra tickets for you two as well. It would be fun."

"We have work day after tomorrow night Nick," Sara pointed out, leaning on a pillar nearby. She knew that a trip with the guys would be both fun and dangerous, although the thought of Catherine being around did make the idea a little more appealing. She tried to convince herself that the thought was only appealing because she wouldn't be the only woman stuck with a bunch of crazy football fans. But somehow, it wasn't as convincing as she would have hoped it would be.

"Fixed it already," Nick took the remote on the coffee table and turned on the television. "We made Grissom convince Ecklie to give us one more night off. So we don't have a problem now."

"How did you manage to convince Grissom to do that?" Sara found that piece of information a bit more interesting than anything else.

"I agreed to do his paperwork for a month," Nick's beaten voice surfaced at this. "Now come on, have some kind of sympathy on me and go pack." He played his second to last card.

"I really have to go?" Sara asked taking in a deep breath.

"Come on, it's a birthday treat for Greg Sar," Nick put on his puppy look. "Plus we all need a vacation, and this can be it. It would be good for you to get out of here for a while." He said in a genuinely sympathetic tone. That probably was his last card.

"Fine, where are we staying?" Sara decided to let it go since some time off might be what she needed to get some things off her mind; namely Lily and that night with Catherine as well. Plus she had friends back in San Francisco. It would be good to see them again after such a long time.

"Well that's the thing," Nick scratched his head awkwardly. "We managed to get reservations for us guys but we couldn't get a reservation for you and Catherine." Nick shifted in his seat when he saw Sara glare at him. "So we thought you could convince one of your friends there to let you and Catherine crash at their place?"

"Argh…" Sara rubbed her temple trying to rid of the headache that was coming. "Fine I'll make a call."

"Awesome," Nick put her feet on the coffee table. But then something caught his eye. "What's that?" Nick pointed at the bite mark visible from the collar of Sara's tank top. Sara quickly pulled up her tank top hiding it.

"I scratched myself a bit hard." She said quickly receiving a questioning look from Nick. Deciding that she needed a change of topic she spoke again. "When are we going anyway?"

"Well when you're ready," Nick said, still giving Sara a curious look. "And when everyone else gets here."

"WHAT?" Sara said loudly making Nick sit straight up again. "Why the hell is everyone coming here? Why aren't they going to the airport?"

"Because we're driving there," Nick raised an eyebrow making a nerve twitch on Sara's forehead. "We just thought it would be fun to have a road trip, that's all." Nick raised his hands in surrender.

"You guys are the most idiotic people I have ever seen," Sara slapped Nick on the back of his head and headed to her room with the intentions to get ready.

"But you still love us right?" Nick tried to check his luck. Sara turned around and gave a hearty laugh.

"We'll see if I love you after this trip ok?" Sara said stepping into her room and taking off her tank top giving Nick a clear view of her back. That was the first time he saw the tattoo on her lower back. He gaped at it until Sara turned around making him look away quickly. "You're walking on thin ice Nick." She threw the tank top at Nick and closed the door behind her with a laugh.

Sara took a long cold shower hoping to get the effects of her little flash back off her mind. She stepped out and looked around her room. It had been one month but she still expected to see Lily sleeping on her bed anytime she walk in to the bedroom or out of the bathroom. She sighed heavily and tried to brush the thought away from her mind, but failed miserably. Deciding to let the thought linger, she took her duffel bag and threw in some clothes into it along with her iPod and a few books knowing she would need them to rid boredom that might arise during the trip. She heard a knock on the door and Greg shouted at her to hurry up resulting in her throwing a book at the door making the younger man back away. She heard laughter from the other side of the door which told her that everyone was probably there already.

She quickly got dressed in her knee length khakis and a white t-shirt. Not bothering to straighten her hair, she threw her bag over her shoulder and stepped out of the room. Greg was sitting on the couch next to Nick fighting for the remote while Catherine sat lazily on the arm chair with Warrick standing behind her, leaning on the back rest of the chair.

As soon as their eyes met, both Catherine and Sara shared a shy smile and turned away from each other.

"Finally," Greg stood up and clapped his hands together. "Road trip babies." He turned from Catherine to Sara receiving a glare from each of them. Sara put the bag down and went into the kitchen to get some water.

"Oh Sar, did you call your friend?" Nick called loudly making Sara slap her forehead.

"I'm calling now," She grabbed her cell from her short pockets and dialed a number. She sipped her water while she waited for an answer. Just then, Catherine walked into the kitchen. She motioned to Sara that she needed some water as well. Sara took another sip from the bottle and handed it to Catherine who took it with a smile.

"SARA! YOU'RE ALIVE," A shrill voice from the other end of the ling making Sara put her phone away from her ear. Catherine gave her a hearty chuckle since even she heard the scream.

"Yes Mia I'm alive, stop screaming now," Sara said softly returning Catherine's smile. "I'm going to be in town for a few days and I need a favor."

"Anything for you my love," Mia said in her normal cheerful voice.

"I need a place for me and a friend to crash for a few days," Sara scratched her head at the word 'friend'. Catherine stood there listening to her conversation making it a bit more difficult for her than it already was.

"You can stay at my place because I probably will be the only one who could offer you a place anyway," Mia said in a voice as if she was lost in thought. "To my knowledge everyone else's place is occupied one way or the other."

"That would be ok," Sara nodded to the phone.

"But I only have one room, so I hope you don't mind sharing it with your friend," Mia pointed out making Sara gulp down loudly. She turned to Catherine who was still sipping her water.

"Uh hold on let me ask her," Sara told Mia who hummed in agreement. She turned to Catherine and scratched her head. "Would you mind sharing the room with me?" She saw Catherine's eye grow wide and then a smile curved on her lips.

"No why would I mind that," Catherine said as if there was nothing wrong. From outside she looked perfectly fine but in the inside, she was panicking like crazy. Even she didn't know why.

"Ok," Sara nodded and went back to her call. "Hey Mia, so I'll see you tonight then ok?"

"Sure, you remember my place right?" Mia asked in a playful tone.

"Of course I do," Sara chuckled at her friend's words. How could she forget the place she had passed out drunk so many times? "See you soon. Bye."

"Bye love," Mia hung the phone making Sara turn to Catherine. They stood like that for a while until they heard Greg scream something about getting late.

"Shall we? Or else Greg might go crazy," Sara said heading out of the kitchen. Catherine put down the water bottle and followed Sara's lead.

"Everything good?" Warrick asked when both women appeared in the living room again. Sara nodded and picked up her bag. "Ok, the guys are taking my car, why don't you girls take Sara's car?"

Sara exchanged a shrug with Catherine. "Sure," They both said together while the guys got up and headed for the door.

Catherine followed their lead with Sara leading the rear of the group. She locked the door behind her. She saw her neighbor Mrs. Katrakis peep her head from her door making Sara smile at her. The old woman quickly closed the door making Sara chuckle. She knew that there was a rumor going on in the building that Sara was a lonesome, crazy person who most probably was a serial killer. And the death of Lily didn't help clear her name either. But Sara always found it hilarious and never did try to clear her name anyway.

Sara heard Greg shout her name from downstairs making her hurry down the stairs and join the rest of the gang.

"ROAD TRIP BABY," Greg screamed on top of his lung as they headed to their respective cars. Sara saw him getting slapped on the back of his head by both Warrick and Nick before they got into the car.

Sara held the door for Catherine before she headed to the driver seat. She took a glance at the chain that hung from her rearview mirror and to the person sitting on the seat next to her. Her head filled with images of the times she had spent with both women and she couldn't help but feel a bit dizzy because of it.

_God why the hell did I have to sleep with Catherine? This is entirely your fault Sara, baaaaaad Sara. _She thought to herself as she turned on her car. _Urgh I hope this trip will be some sort of help. _

Sara sighed before she drove off behind Warrick's car. Her eye caught the chain once again and the sight of Catherine from the mirror as well.

_Why the hell do I have a bad feeling that these two will be the death of me?..._

_

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_**ok i know this chapter is kind of weird with all the flashbacks and all but i hope u still liked it...let me know what you think, even if its 'oh this sucks':)...i'll try to update soon but for now its sleep and stupid reports that are due in two days time for me :) cia for now**

**thanks for reading...**


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

**Ok its been long, but thats coz assignments and studies just caught up with me...but now that assignments are done and exams are close, this is my way of procrastinating studying...hope u enjoy...its not much, but hopefully i will update the next chapter soon...thanks for the reviews and for being patient :)  
**

**for my angel...love u**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1...REVIEW and ENJOY...**

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Catherine sighed for the umpteenth time in the car. Sara hadn't said a word since they drove off. They had been driving for almost an hour without uttering a single word. Catherine had taken few glances at the brunette who seemed to be lost in her own little world. The blonde noted that Sara's hands gripped harder on the steering wheel at times making her badly want to ask her what was wrong.

"Do you like football?" Sara finally asked the blonde in a soft, croaky voice.

"Used to hate it," Catherine sighed and looked out of the window going into a soft haze. "Alan was a football fanatic. So I began liking it since I used to watch it all the time with him. But now, I don't know how I feel about it."

"Can I give you a piece of advice?" Sara asked softly, still not taking her eyes off the road. Catherine hummed softly as her answer. "Don't let yourself like something because of someone else. You will end up regretting it in the end."

"That's the first and last time I let someone do that to me," Catherine signed and bit her lips.

From the corner of her eyes, Sara took a glance at the blonde sitting next to her. Her eyes were fixed on the road, her teeth digging into her lips and her hands clutching her knees which were bent towards her chest. She looked like a little girl who had lost her favorite toy. It was precious, but very much depressing at the same time as well.

"Can I ask you something?" Sara asked remembering something that had occurred to her sometime earlier.

"Sure," Catherine turned her head towards the brunette.

"Last night…urm…" Sara cleared her throat while Catherine bit her lips, this time with slight embarrassment. "That…urm….that wasn't the first time you have done that was it…I mean…urm…with a woman that is."

Catherine's lips curved into a smile that was invisible to Sara since she was making sure she didn't look at Catherine at the moment. It took Catherine a few seconds to find her voice.

"No it wasn't the first time," Catherine said softly but still with a smile. "I have been with women before during my day but I haven't been with one in quite a while now."

"Oh…" Sara nodded as she processed the information. "So you like guys better than girls huh?" Sara asked in a playful tone making Catherine chuckle.

"It's not that," Catherine ran her hand through her hair. "I never have the courage to go to a woman and just ask her out, if a woman comes to me and asks me out, that's another story." She went on explaining, her hands waving in the air which Sara found really funny. "Frankly I like women better than men. They are more…," Catherine paused trying to find the right word.

"Warm?" Sara chipped in making Catherine snap her fingers.

"YES, they are more warm and more caring then men," Catherine pointed her finger at Sara who kept her eyes on the road. "Plus women are better in bed than most men I have been with. Hell think you top both lists." As soon as the words slipped Catherine's lips, she clapped her hands on her mouth. "Shit." She mumbled into her hands.

Sara's eyes grew wide and her feet accidently pressed on the race pedal making the car jerk, throwing both women forward in their seat.

"Whoa," Catherine grabbed her seat and put down her legs to steady herself. "Trying to kill us both Sara?"

"Sorry," Sara brought the car back to its speed and took a deep breath. "You just caught me off guard there."

"Yeah I didn't mean to sound so blunt," Catherine scratched her arm and put her legs back up on the seat. "Sorry."

"Oh don't be, I'm flattered," Sara said with a smug smile. "I just never expected it."

"Ok," Catherine said softly, wrapping her arms around her legs.

"So you remember what happened that night huh?" Sara asked prolonging the conversation. From the corner of her eyes she saw Catherine slightly shift in her seat.

"Yeah it all started to come back after the hangover started to fade," Catherine rushed the words. She heard Sara clear her throat uncomfortably making her bite her lips. "You don't remember anything?"

"No urm, I do…some of it," Sara said as hastily as Catherine.

"Ok," Catherine repeated in the same soft voice. The silence that lingered around them earlier came back again. But this time there was nothing comforting about it, it was awkward and made both women want to jump out of the car just to get out of it.

They drove in silence for other 4 or so hours without saying a single word to each other. The only sound in the car was coming from the radio. Catherine had put her seat down and made herself comfortable on the seat. Sara was softly shifting in her seat since her ass was slowly becoming numb. Just then Sara's phone rang making Catherine sit up. Sara checked the caller ID to see that it was Nick.

"Could you answer?" Sara gave the phone to Catherine who nodded in agreement.

"Yes Nick?" Catherine asked in a slightly croaky voice. She kept humming in agreement to whatever the man was saying. "Ok, we'll follow your lead. Bye." Catherine hung up the phone and put the phone in her pocket and turned to Sara. "Apparently we need a break from all the driving and there's a stop nearby. So follow them?"

Sara just nodded and kept on driving until she saw a stop nearby. She pulled over behind the guys car. Catherine had already stepped out of the car before Sara turned off the car and stepped out herself. She stretched her body realizing just how she felt and how numb her legs and ass was. She leaned on her car and bent slightly to crack her back when Catherine stepped next to her and leaned on the car as well. They waited until the guys came over bringing an end to the silence between the two women.

"I cannot feel my ass," Nick complained moving his hips in a girly manner making Catherine fight back a chuckle.

"Forget about your ass man, I'm starving," Warrick jumped on the hood of Sara's car making the brunette frown a little.

"I agree with Warrick," Catherine patted on Warrick's back and turned her attention to the diner.

"Forget that, I gotta pee," Greg called while he hurried to the restrooms.

Deciding that it would be a good idea to get some food before they leave, the CSIs headed to the diner and took their seats. To Sara and Catherine's glee, they were sitting in front of each other. The two men next to them sensed their anxiety and kept quiet although they did exchange puzzled looks with each other. Soon enough, Greg joined them making the table a bit more lively.

"I recommend you guys not use the restroom here," Greg scrunched his face with disgust. "It's nasty. They got…"

"Greg we're supposed to eat, don't ruin everyone's appetite," Nick slapped on the younger man's bicep just when the waitress came over to collect their orders.

The table went into complete silence yet again. While Sara fidgeted with her own fingers, Catherine stared out the window softly tapping her fingers on the table. The three men gave both women a look and exchanged questionings look with each other.

"Ok let's cut to the chase, what on earth is going on between you girls?" Warrick asked staring at Sara who was sitting opposite to him.

"What?" Sara asked as innocently as she could, hiding any kind of anxiety that arouse with the question. She saw Catherine turned her head to Warrick as innocently as her.

"You two look like you ended up together in bed after a drunken night or something, so spill," Nick stated frankly making Catherine cough slightly. Sara bit her lips as she squeezed her hands in each other.

"What are you fighting about now?" Greg asked softly making sure he would not get in to any trouble with the two women.

Sara exchanged a questioning look with Catherine who had a very nervous look on her face. She took a deep breath and put on a plastic smile, turning to the boys.

"What makes you think we are fighting? Just because you boys never see us have our fun doesn't mean that we don't have a lot of fun," Sara lied through her teeth. She saw Catherine's face relax and a smile curve on her lips.

Warrick, Nick and Greg exchanged a confused look at each other and the next second, they burst into laughter. Sara frowned and punched nick's biceps while Catherine pushed Warrick away.

"You guys getting along would be like seeing one of the wonders of the world," Nick wiped his reddened face.

"Well I guess they don't get to hear the story of the night we spent together huh Sar?" Catherine asked smiling cheekily at the brunette who all of a sudden went pale.

_Did she just say that? _Sara's stomach twirled around and she stared at the blonde with utter surprise. Just then Catherine winked at her telling her that she was just pulling the guy's legs._ Right, what was I thinking? Of course she wouldn't want anyone to know about that. _Sara took a deep breath. _What the hell was I thinking. _

"Yeah too bad," Sara crossed her arms over her stomach and leaned back on the booth. "Would have been a good story but oh well."

The two women turned to their colleagues to see them staring back at the women with their eyes wide, jaws hanging open and each with a question mark stamped on their forehead. Surprisingly, Greg was the first to recover.

"You two what?" Greg leaned forward so that he was almost laying on the table.

"Yeah, u two spent a night together?" Warrick looked at Catherine while Nick shared the same look at Sara.

"As in sex?" Nick specified.

That made Catherine burst into laughter and Sara rest her head on the table as she laughed along with the blonde. All guys let out a chorus of 'oh come on' when they realized that the girls were just playing them.

"For a minute there I thought you two actually hooked up," Warrick sighed heavily with a dreamy look in his eyes.

"Stop picturing it," Catherine slapped on the back of his head making the table laugh heartily.

Soon enough, their food was brought to them and they eat happily, talking about anything and everything, contemplating from what Grissom would do during his holidays to talks about their high schools.

After finishing their food and putting gas in the cars, both parties set off on their journey again. In the girl's car, Catherine had taken the wheel while Sara made herself comfortable on the backseat. She was lying on the seat, bringing her knees to her chest so that she was hugging her whole body. While Catherine followed the boys car and listened to the music, her mind wandered to the one person who had occupied her mind the most the past few days; Alan.

He came to her life when she was feeling the loneliest in a long time and when she felt extremely vulnerable. But he wasn't like anyone else, he didn't try to take advantage of her vulnerability, nor was he just after her body. It was new for Catherine, it felt so right. In just 2 weeks time, he turned her life into a living paradise. He helped her deal with Lindsey, her mother, work and everything. He was a hopeless romantic, and Catherine found that extremely attractive on a guy. He made her dinner, took her out on trips, bought her things, in short treated her like a queen. All the time they spent together felt like heaven for Catherine.

It was 8 months into their relationship when Alan proposed to her. She didn't even think twice before saying yes to his proposal. She felt even happier knowing that he would be right by her side for the rest of her life, for her to hold his hand, for him to keep her close. But one day he just left. He spent the whole day with her; lunch, helping Lindsey with homework, fun times alone and when she woke up after her nap, he was gone. All that was left of him was the note which said he had to leave and that he couldn't do it anymore. What that meant, only him and God would know.

Lost in her thoughts, Catherine didn't realize that there were tears rolling down her cheek endlessly. Her grip on the steering wheel had tightened and soft whimpers were escaping her lips with no control of her own. Just then Catherine heard Sara groan in her sleep. She was brought to the reality from her terrible subconscious world of the moment. She quickly wiped her face and turned her head around to see the brunette's face scrunched up, still hugging herself tightly and slightly shaking. Thinking that it was because of the car being too cold, she turned the AC down.

After a long and tiring drive, during which Sara slept all the way, they arrived in San Francisco. It was nighttime and it only added to the tiredness Catherine felt. Catherine followed the boy's car to their hotel and parked the car, stepping out to talk to them before they head off to their destination.

"We're never driving again," Warrick cracked his back loudly making Catherine shiver. It always gave her the creeps when she hears people's bones crack.

"Greg, since you and Nick came up with this brilliant idea, you two can take the cars back," Catherine ran her hand through her hair. "I'm taking a plane back home."

"I second that," Warrick agreed with a snigger. Nick and Greg seemed a bit too tired to argue at the moment.

"We'll see about that later," Nick yawned. "Right now, I'm too damn tired to think. Just want a shower and sleep man."

"Yeah I agree," Greg scratched his neck impatiently. "How about we just get on with life tomorrow?"

"Sure, I'll expect your call tomorrow then gentlemen," Catherine said with a snigger, bowing slightly. "For now, I bid thee farewell."

The guys all nodded with similar smiles curved on their lips. Catherine watched the men disappear through the door into the hotel before she went back to the car. Just after she started the car, she remembered that she had no idea as to where she was supposed to go. She turned to face the woman who was still sleeping on the backseat. Catherine was confused as to why Sara was still shaking. Deciding to be bold, Catherine pulled herself slightly to the back and put her hand on Sara's forehead. She was burning up.

"Oh my god, Sara?" She quickly patted on Sara's cheek, still failing to wake the brunette. "Sara honey wake up. Come on Sara, wake up." She shook the brunette by her shoulder a bit harder.

All of a sudden Sara sat upwards throwing Catherine back into her chair. A tear rolled down the brunette's cheek without any control of hers whatsoever and sweat was breaking from her forehead badly. All Catherine could do was stare at the brunette as she tried to gather herself. She was breathing heavily and holding onto her knees for dear life. Catherine didn't dare speak, all she could do was listen to the rapid deep breaths coming from Sara.

"Sara?" Catherine asked weakly making Sara wipe her face quickly.

"Yeah, sorry," She turned to the blonde and gave a weak, fake smile. "Are we there yet?"

"Uh huh, the guys just checked in," Catherine bit her lips. "Are you ok?"

"I'm fine," Sara quickly got out of the car and leaned on the door. Catherine decided to stay inside giving the brunette the space. In a few seconds, Sara got into the front seat and took in a deep breath.

"You want me to drive or are you ok with just following my directions?" Sara asked buckling her seatbelt. Catherine just kept staring at the brunette in the most confused manner. Sara looked at Catherine and raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"You just woke up like someone was trying to kill you and all you have to say is what?" Catherine asked a bit rudely.

"I told you I'm fine," Sara said a bit harshly than she intended. "Just turn right here." Sara directed Catherine with her hand.

"Look Sar, if you wanna talk…" Catherine said moving her head as she turned the car around the corner.

"Catherine, .fine," Sara gritted her teeth and curled her fingers into a fist.

"Ok, I'll leave you alone," Catherine retorted back as rudely as Sara. "You can't offer a person some genuine help these days." She added under her breath, not caring if the brunette heard her or not.

Even if Sara heard Catherine, she ignored it. The rest of the journey was just Sara giving directions to where they were going. After 30 minutes of driving, they pulled over in front of an apartment building. Sara got out of the car as soon as it came to a halt and grabbed her bag from the back heading towards the building. Rolling her eyes at Sara's behavior, Catherine followed the brunette's suite slamming the car door while at it. The building looked quite fancy and Catherine couldn't help but wonder how Sara got to know someone who might live in a building as such. She stopped at her tracks when Sara stopped to buzz her friend.

"Yeah?" A soft, sleepy voice came from the speaker.

"It's me," Sara said in an agitated voice making Catherine roll her eyes yet again. Why? She didn't know.

Without any other word, the front door unlocked and Sara got in, holding the door for the blonde. Neither woman shared eye contact with each other as they headed to the elevator. Sara pressed 12 and leaned on the wall to her side while Catherine leaned on the back wall. The only sound they heard was the noise coming from the elevator. And for some reason it was annoying Catherine very much.

The elevator door opened and Sara and Catherine stepped out. Catherine was slightly taken back due to the lights that came crashing onto her face. She remembered the words of Parker, the overly happy boyfriend of Phoebe in Friends series who said "my God, what a fantastically well-lit hallway". This hallway surely fit that description. While Catherine stood in front of elevator trying to adjust to the bright lights, Sara was already heading towards the end of their destination. Realizing this, Catherine quickly gathered her bag and hurried behind her colleague.

Sara knocked on the door, ignoring the doorbell. Soon enough, the door opened and there stood a stunningly beautiful blonde. Her hair was almost down to her waist with wavy curls, tanned complexion, striking green eyes, curvy body which was minimally covered with a tank top and a very short pair of boxers. Even she looked as if she had just woken up, but as soon as she saw Sara her face lit up.

"Sara you remembered my hatred towards doorbell," She put her arms around Sara making her drop her bag to hug her back. "It's so good to see you, my god it's been a while huh?" She spoke in a thick British accent surprising Catherine a bit.

"You too Mia," Sara ran her hand through Mia's hair before breaking the hug. "You let your hair grow."

"People kept telling me it looks sexy so I couldn't bear to cut it," She winked in a flirty manner making Catherine wonder. She then turned to Catherine and held a hand. "Mia Palmer, I'm guessing you're Sara's friend."

"Catherine Willows, nice to meet you," Catherine gave the girl a smile as she shook her hand.

"Nice to meet you too," The young blonde smiled. "You must be exhausted. Maybe you should get some rest. I got to go in to work in about an hour anyway."

"You work at night?" Catherine asked forgetting that she herself works the graveyard shift.

"She's a cop," Sara picked up her bag and headed inside letting Mia show Catherine her way in.

"Sadly I work at night, I'm like batman without the fancy gadget or body tight get ups," Mia closed the door behind her and lead Catherine into the living room where now Sara was lounging in. Catherine gave a hearty chuckle at Mia's words before taking a look around. It was a very nice apartment. The living room itself was huge with goofy yet classy furniture decorating it beautifully.

"Your room is the last one from the left," Mia pointed at the small hallway at the far side of the apartment. "You can take a shower and get to bed, you must be tired." She said stretching her well built body.

"I'm game," Catherine stated and headed to the direction Mia pointed. As soon as the blonde disappeared out of their sight, Mia slapped Sara's legs off the armrest of the couch.

"How are you?" She sat down next to the brunette who sat up nodding at her friend's question. "Not much into using words these days are you?"

"Sorry," Sara said softly. "How've you been?"

"Can't complain," Mia crossed her legs and turned all her attention to her friend. "Now tell me seriously, how are you holding up?"

"I'm fine," Sara said shortly.

"Yeah fucking right," Mia rolled her eyes. "Who are you trying to kid Sara?"

"What do you want me to say?" Sara gave Mia an angry look.

"Have you talked to anyone about Lily after all that?" Mia said slightly hesitating to use the name.

"No," Again the brunette kept her words short.

"Bloody hell Sara," Mia said in an angry whisper. "Why are you doing that to yourself? You can't keep all those feelings bottled in you love."

"I think I'm doing a good job," Sara gave her friend a sarcastic smile.

"I'm not too convinced of that fact," Mia scowled.

"Good for me that I don't live to approve anyone," Sara laid back on the couch. But she was pulled up by the collar forcing her to sit up again.

"Don't give me that attitude," Mia said, putting her face close to Sara's so that their noses were touching "I know you, and I know what this must be doing to you. So please, don't push me away. I love you and that's why I'm telling you, you should not keep all that in you."

Sara looked into her friend's eye and gulped down. She knew Mia was right but she really didn't want to talk about anything.

"Remember the last time something like this happened?" Mia brushed the side of Sara's face. "And that was your mother, not someone you emotionally connected well even. But you were still crushed. And this is Lily. How can you tell me that you're just fine huh?"

"I can't," Sara said with a deep breath. "But I don't even know how to start to talk about it." She bit her lips.

"For now get some sleep, you look exhausted," Mia cupped Sara's face and placed a kiss on her forehead. "We'll talk in the morning when you get a good night's sleep and when I don't have work hovering up my arse." Sara chuckled at the word arse making Mia roll her eyes. "Still can't get used to it?"

"Nope," Sara smiled and got up from the couch. While the brunette bid good night to her friend, Catherine was leaning on the hallway wall, confused and breathing heavily.

_What the fuck is going on? Who the hell is Lily? What the fuck is eating Sara? How the hell can she keep her calm when something as big as Mia makes it seem is bothering her? How was she so calm when she dealt with my depression when she was that depressed herself? Who is this Lily? What happened to her? Something happened to Sara's mother? What else is she hiding? Who is Lily? Why is that part bothering me more than anything else? And why is Mia so close to Sara? I mean they look like ex-girlfriends. Are they? Why is such trivia bothering me? And who on earth is Lily? WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!_

Catherine ran her hand through her hair grabbing a fistful of her hair.

_I have been so selfish. She has been going through so much and I just kept pouring my problems on her. And she kept taking it. _

Just then, she heard Sara heading towards the hallway. She hurried into the room and into the bathroom, closing the door behind her. She heard Sara walk in and probably drop onto the bed, judging from the noise. After waiting a few minutes, Catherine peeped her head out of the bathroom door to see Sara on her stomach, hugging the pillow she was laying her head on.

Catherine quickly grabbed her clothes, changed into a bit more comfortable attire and laid on the bed. She stared at the ceiling for god knows how long, listening to the rapid breathing coming from the limp body laying next to her. She turned her head to see Sara's face half buried on the pillow.

"What mysteries are you carrying with you Sara?" She ran her hand over Sara's hair making the brunette stir. She quickly withdrew her hand and turned to the other side.

_I will make you talk to me Sara, if that's the last thing I do. _Catherine closed her eyes, drifting off to a disturbing sleep.

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**not much huh? but the next part will be a lot...put in a review, will motivate me to write fast...**

**thanks for reading**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

**Took a long time but i managed to brush away a huge writer's block and write this down...if it is not good i am so sorry (and sorry for any grammatical or spelling errors, i tried to catch 'em all)...**

**hope you guys enjoy this chapter...and thanks for the reviews, they were very inspirational and thank u for being patient with me...i'll try to update the next chapter soon...so there u go, chapter eight :)**

**baby...u said 'please' in a way i just couldnt ignore ;) so this is for u**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1...REVIEW and ENJOY pls...**

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Catherine walked out of the bathroom, still rubbing her eyes with weary. She looked over to the bed to see Sara sprawled on it like an eagle. The brunette did really know how to take up the whole bed. Giving the sleeping beauty a smile, Catherine checked her hair in the mirror and headed out of the room. Deciding that she won't have a problem finding coffee in the house, she stepped into the kitchen to find Mia sitting in a chair beside the table with her feet resting carelessly on the table, reading the paper and enjoying her coffee. When she sensed Catherine's presence in the room, the young woman quickly put her feet down and smiled sheepishly.

"Good morning," She said in a cheerful tone at which Catherine nodded.

"And to you too," The blonde said turning towards the coffee machine. "Aren't you home a bit early?"

"It was a slow day," Mia put down the paper and took her coffee cup. "And I thought I needed to catch up with my arse of a friend after decades of not hearing from her."

"Sounds like it's going to be a hard day for you since getting something out of Sara is as hard as rocket science," Catherine chuckled sitting down with her coffee.

"Who says rocket science is hard?" Mia joked.

"I think a lot of people will tell you that it is very hard," Catherine winked at the girl who nodded along. So, how long have you known Sara for anyway?" She asked deciding to know as much as she could about her colleague from her friend.

"Since college, she was a senior who saved me from getting my arse kicked by a bunch of bullies," Mia grinned cheekily. "Since then she always made sure I was well taken care of, even after college."

"You were bullied?" Catherine choked on her coffee taking a good look at the young woman sitting in front of her.

"Oh trust me, back then I was a total geek who got picked on by everyone," Mia chuckled as if it was a happy memory for her.

"Oh that's just hard to believe," Catherine said, her attention totally on the girl in front of her.

"So I have been told but trust me, it is true," Mia grinned and sighed at the same time. "My family was bloody conservative. I was supposed to be a boy but I ended up a girl. In my parent's books, a girl is supposed to stay home, cook dinner and take care of the husband. But I wanted to study, to have my own life even though I didn't have the first idea how to have one." Mia sighed heavily yet again.

"Tough years those were, high school was a mess," Mia continued while Catherine listened intently. "Though I topped in every class, I had absolutely no friends. Not even in college. The first real friend I had was Sara. My life started when I was 25, after I moved here with her."

"Wow, I don't think anyone would expect you to have such a background seeing who you are now," Catherine smiled hoping Mia could take it as a compliment.

"I clean up good girl," She winked making Catherine chuckle.

"Which part of England are you from anyway?" Catherine asked softly.

"Newcastle," Mia answered shortly.

"OH, I've always wanted to go there," Catherine said excitedly making Mia frown a little.

"Why?" She asked with a smirk.

"I find England fascinating," Catherine shrugged. "And I just like the sound of Newcastle."

"You just find our accent sexy don't you," Mia joked making Catherine laugh.

"Maybe a little bit of that too," She winked at the younger girl who raised her cup before taking a sip. "So was Sara like this when she was in college as well?" Catherine asked changing the subject back to what she wanted.

"What do you mean?" Mia asked, finally putting the paper down.

"You know, all sour faced, unsociable, so freaking stubborn, and a pain in the ass in short?" Catherine asked raising her eyebrow at Mia who laughed heartily.

"That sounds about right," Mia nodded. "I'm going to guess that you haven't really made the effort to get to know her."

"Why do you say that?" Catherine asked leaning forward in the chair.

"It's an observation. People who don't really know her have that impression of her," Mia explained. "If one takes the time to get to know Sidle, they won't have that impression. Sure she is still stubborn, a pain in your bloody arse but you'd much rather tell someone that she's a perfectly humble, generous and extremely caring human being."

"I have seen that side of her, a little bit," Catherine sighed. "But I don't think she really wants me to see it. The only times I have seen that Sara was when I felt so insanely vulnerable."

"I think its human nature. We all tend to put our guard down and bring forth our soft side when we see a broken person, especially a broken woman in front of us," Mia shrugged. "Get to know her why don't you? She's not as scary as you think she is." Mia grinned.

"I want to, I really do," Catherine smiled. "But I can't help it if she doesn't want to let me."

"Stubborn as she is, if you push the right buttons she'll let go," Mia winked and stood up putting the cup in the sink. "Wanna move to the couch? It's a bit more comfortable for the bum than these wooden devils."

"Yes please," Catherine stood up and followed Mia into the living room. Mia dropped onto the couch with a soft 'hmph' while Catherine sat on the single armchair next to it.

"Since I have told you pretty much what I am all about, why don't you tell me about yourself?" Mia flopped onto her back and crossed her knees over the other.

"Urm...where do I start..." Catherine scratched her cheeks adorably before she started to talk. It took a while for her to finish telling Mia everything, from her teenage years to what she had become to date since the young woman was very keen on interrupting her, especially when the blonde told her what she used to do for a living.

"Wow," Mia exclaimed when Catherine stopped talking. "Woman, you have had an interesting life."

"You can say that again," Catherine grinned.

"Don't kid me, you really used to strip?" Mia asked, pulling her knees close to her chest as she watched Catherine with fascination.

"One of the best honey, one of the best," Catherine winked before laughing at her own words.

"Oh man, I wish I had seen one of your shows," Mia joked along.

"You wouldn't have been able to take your eyes off me or forget me for that matter," Catherine smiled slyly. "So maybe it was a good thing that I gave it up before I broke your little heart."

"A pretty face like you, who would want to forget love," Mia flirted right back making Catherine grin. "And I'm sure your body's even more memorable."

"Awe honey, you would always want to come back for more if you ever had me," Catherine leaned forward in the chair, biting her lips slyly as she went. "I don't think you can handle me rejecting you even once."

"Ouch, I think your words just broke my little heart," Mia fell back with her hands over her chest, wailing dramatically making Catherine laugh. She sat back up, with a cheeky smile. "But really, I cannot imagine you being a stripper."

"Should I demonstrate?" Catherine raised her eyebrow.

"I don't think I can keep my hands off you if you do so love," Mia winked making Catherine grin.

"What's going on?" A muffled yet surprised voice came from the hallway making Catherine and Mia stop from flirting. At the hallway stood a confused Sara, looking from Mia to Catherine with nothing but questions in her eyes. Her hair was messed up and her eyes were a bit red.

"Hey, you're up early," Mia smiled at her friend who just kept staring at her all confused.

"Yeah," Sara said in her morning croaky voice. "What are you two doing?"

"We were just talking," Catherine smiled at her colleague.

"Sounded a bit more than talking to me," Sara scratched her hair while she yawned. She looked like a little kid who got woken up early on a Saturday.

"Awe love, did we wake you up?" Mia asked ignoring what Sara said.

"Yeah," Sara stretched her body before yawning again. "What time is it?"

"Fifteen past eleven," Mia answered checking her watch.

"Oh that's too early for vacation," Sara turned around. "Are you guys crazy being up so early? GO TO BED." Sara said loudly before the other two women heard the door close behind her.

"I see she isn't a morning person," Catherine grinned.

"Oh she's not," Mia smiled. "She does her best work during night." Mia added in a mischievous tone.

"I'm guessing that you're referring to more than her working the graveyard shift," Catherine grinned understanding the mischief in Mia's words. As an answer, Mia just winked and stretched her body. "What is her social life like anyway?" Catherine asked curiously.

"Sara? Oh wow what can I say about that? Urm…let's see…" Mia scratched her hair clumsily. "She used to go clubbing a lot, and she's a heavy drinker. At least she used to be," Mia bit her lips in thought. "She used to be a player. She could get whoever she wanted with very limited effort. I never knew how she did that," Mia frowned.

"Sara used to be a player?" Catherine almost choked on her coffee. "That doesn't sound right."

"Oh believe me, that girl can get any chick she wanted any day," Mia said in a very serious tone. "I was quite jealous of that."

"So she's a total lesbian huh?" Catherine asked wishing to confirm her doubts.

"Of course," Mia sniggered in a 'duh' tone.

"You said she _used _to be a player, she's not like that now?" Catherine asked pushing the conversation forward.

"Nah, she turned to serious relationships after she met Lily," Mia ran a hand through her hair and laid down on the couch, making herself comfortable. "I never thought I'll ever see Sara become a 'one-girl' kind of person. But I guess there comes one person in every one's life that changes them."

"I guess so," Catherine drank the last of her coffee in one gulp as she pushed the thought of Alan to the back of her head. "Urm…where's this Lily now?"

That changed the air in the room. She saw Mia sit up, frowning at her. Mia scanned Catherine's face to see if the blonde was joking to see that she had nothing but questions in her eyes. It made her frown even more and take a deep breath.

"You never met her?" Mia asked softly.

"No," Catherine said in the same soft voice. Mia just kept on staring at the blonde. "Did they break up or something?" Catherine asked again when all Mia did was stare at her disbelievingly. But that question made the shock on Mia's face even bigger.

"Lily…died…of cancer," Mia said pausing between the words. And then there was silence that was so cold that it could cut someone's throat off.

"Oh…." Catherine couldn't find the words. She never knew that Sara was going through something like that. She couldn't help but feel like a lousy friend and a lousy colleague who didn't even catch the situation in which Sara was in. "Urm…wow…urr…how long were they together for?" Catherine asked, clearing her throat which had gone very dry.

"Three and almost half years," Mia wiped her face with exhaustion and depression which suddenly rushed through every vein of hers.

"Oh my," Catherine leaned back on the chair and closed her eyes. "I never knew."

"She is a private person," Mia sighed heavily. "You know, she hasn't talked to anyone about this."

"Damn," Catherine exclaimed again. "Being that much private cannot be good for someone, can it?" Catherine lifted her head slightly at Mia who raised her shoulders a bit and sighed again.

"Well she doesn't really have friends in Vegas," Mia said without thinking. She saw Catherine gave her an offended look at which she smiled. "Sure you lot are there but you are more of colleagues than friends right? I mean come on, you didn't even know who Lily is."

"It's not our fault that she doesn't tell us," Catherine frowned and sat up, hunching her body forward.

"It's not, but if you know Sara you'll know that you pretty much have to drag stuff out of her by force," Mia tilted her head slightly. "It's a pain in the arse really."

"I wish she'd trust us, or at least me to share some of what she feels," Catherine sighed. "She has helped me a lot these few days, I just want to return the favor. But I can't do it unless she lets me now can I?" Catherine's words became a bit harsh. "I'm not asking for much. She just really has major trust issues huh?"

"Majorly major," Mia said with a chuckle. "But hey, I'm glad to see that there are people who care for her in Vegas too. It makes us, her friends, make a lot comfortable." Mia took Catherine's hands and squeezed it.

"I'm sorry, I just feel really bad knowing someone around me is in that much pain and I can't help," Catherine sighed. "Especially when that person, even if subconsciously, is helping me through a lot of things."

"Just talk to her. You shouldn't go straight into the problem. Beat around the bush a little before you move to the path of even asking her if something's wrong." Mia smiled. "You'll get her to talk that way."

"Yeah?" Catherine asked softly, concentrating on the warm hands covering hers.

"Trust me," Mia smiled. "Plus with you and me bugging her, she will give in eventually. And later there will be Aaron, Tracy, Lucille and even Travis."

"I'm guessing that's her gang here?" Catherine chuckled.

"Yeah, that's our little gang," Mia grinned and turned her head. "Here, I'll show you some pictures." She got up and headed towards the fireplace on which stood quite a lot of frames. She grabbed almost all the frames and dropped all of it on the coffee table.

"Wow," Catherine grabbed one picture in which two men were smiling at the camera, one dressed as a jester and the other dressed as which looked like a Greek God.

"That's Travis," Mia pointed at the Jester and then towards the Greek God. "And that's Aaron. And this is Lucille, Aaron's older sister," She took another picture in which a blonde stood next to a much younger Sara who was wearing beach attire and holding a surf board. "And this is Tracy." Mia handed the other picture in which another blonde, much taller and prettier girl was posing for the camera with Sara's hands wrapped around her waist from behind. "They dated for a while."

"I can see that," Catherine grinned and grabbed the other pictures. They spent a good amount of time going through Mia's picture frames and even an album in which there were certain pictures Sara would have never wanted Catherine to see.

"She was one joyful girl wasn't she?" Catherine put down the album and leaned back on the chair.

"Quite yes," Mia nodded and put the album and pictures back in place. "So you have a daughter?"

Catherine nodded and started talking about the love of her life, her daughter. In the process of talking about Lindsey, work, world peace, each other's hobbies, the sea, music and even food, they went through another cup of coffee and a packet of cookies and even an hour and half of their time. They didn't even realize how long they had been sitting and talking until a loud thud came from the room grabbing their attention.

"What the hell," Catherine quickly headed towards the room with Mia closely behind her. She opened the door to see Sara sitting on the floor with her arms wrapped around her knees and her head resting on them. "What happened to you?" Catherine asked stopping at the doorway.

Sara looked up, rubbing her eyes in the process. Catherine heard Mia chuckle from her side and saw that the younger woman was trying very hard not to laugh out loud.

"I rolled off the bed," Sara yawned and gave a glare at Mia. "Don't Mia."

"What can I say Sar, it's still funny when you fall off the bed," Mia laughed loudly, making Catherine also grin.

"Oh shut up," Sara stood up and stretched her body. "Since the bed wants me off it, I'm gonna take a shower now. Do we have coffee?"

Both women at the doorway nodded at which Sara nodded with a yawn and disappeared into the bathroom.

"Pocket full of sunshine isn't she?" Mia patted on Catherine's shoulder and turned around towards the living room again.

"That she is," Catherine nodded just when a phone started to ring from the room. She scouted the room to find Sara's cell phone on the floor and saw that it was Nick calling. "Hey Nicky, what's up?"

"Cath honey, how you doing?" Nick asked in an overly joyful manner.

"I'm good, are you drunk?" Catherine asked with a chuckle.

"No, just very much awake," Nick chuckled back. "Hey, we decided to go out and check out the city in the evening. You guys in?"

"Evening?" Catherine scratched her cheeks softly.

"Warrick said he's not going to wake up before 3," Nick sighed. "So what do you say? We can go for dinner afterward."

"Okay I'm in. So I'll ask Sara and let you know," Catherine nodded to herself.

"Alright, you ladies enjoy your day," Nick said in his most gentle tone. "See you later."

"Bye Nicky," Catherine grinned and hung up. Just then Sara poked her head out of the bathroom door with her hair dripping wet. "Need something?"

"Yeah can you grab the towel from my bag please?" Sara gave a soft, shy smile making Catherine's inside go awe.

"Sure," Catherine smiled.

The blonde gave the towel to Sara who thanked as shyly she asked for it. Catherine headed out to the living room where Mia was watching some show, laying comfortably on the couch. The two women went back to continuing their little chat about everything that existed on the face of the earth. They were talking about the Amazon warriors when Sara walked out of the bedroom and into the kitchen, clearly looking for coffee. Soon enough the brunette stepped into the living room and headed to the couch where Mia was laying comfortably.

"What are you guys talking about?" Sara asked brushing away Mia's legs so that she could sit at the end of couch.

"Amazon Warriors," Mia grinned at her friend while Catherine chuckled along. Sara scrunched her face as she took a sip off her coffee.

"Why?" She asked curiously.

"Oh come on, they must have been hot," Mia said in a 'matter-of-fact' tone. "Female warriors, sexy armor, get any images?"

"No," Sara said simply making Mia roll her eyes.

"You have lost the touch of realizing sexiness in people," Mia sounded like a little kid which made Catherine laugh. "Like this one right here. I mean how could you work with her without doing something about it?"

Mia pointed at Catherine who suddenly stopped laughing and a blush appeared on her cheeks. Along with Catherine, Sara went silent as well. She decided that she was going to ignore the statement and concentrate on her coffee.

"Oh wow," Mia grinned cheekily, looking from Catherine to Sara taking in the awkward silence forming between them.

"Don't," Sara said simply shutting Mia up completely.

"Ok fine," She lifted her hands up in surrender and turned to her show again.

"Urm Nick said they are going to see the city in the evening, you want to come?" Catherine asked softly breaking the awkwardness between the two CSIs.

"Yeah sure, that should be fun," Sara nodded avoiding eye contact with the blonde at all cost.

"You lived here for years, why do you need a tour?" Mia asked with a frown.

"Because I haven't lived here for the past few years you nitwit," Sara said with a grin making Mia slap her thigh using her feet. "You wanna come with us?"

"Nah, I'm gonna catch up with my sleep," Mia stretched and made herself more comfortable by putting her feet on Sara's lap. "Oh by the way, I have a surprise for you." She pointed at Sara who looked at her with interest.

"What is it?" Sara asked curiously.

"You gotta wait and see," Mia said focusing on her show. "Can't be too long now, so don't start to ask me too many ruddy questions."

"Ok Ms. Grumpy Gills," Sara rolled her eyes and went back to her coffee. "Oh how are the guys doing?"

"Quite good," Mia answered shortly making Sara frown.

"That's all you're going to say?" Sara slapped Mia's feet making the younger woman frown.

"Aye, ask them when you meet them," Mia stretched again showing the two women in the living room just how lazy she was feeling at the moment.

"Excuse…" Sara started to say but was interrupted by the door bell. "…me…?" Sara completed the sentence all confused since Mia jumped right off the couch and headed to answer the door. "Is it just me or is she being very annoying?" Sara asked Catherine who shrugged with a chuckle. The blonde decided to stay away from the two women and to just sit back and watch them interact.

Suddenly, there was a loud commotion from the doorway and what seemed to be like a herd of people rushed in through the door. Catherine stared at everyone who hugged Mia and headed to the living room to a very bewildered yet smiling Sara.

"HEY," The brunette stood up and hugged the first man who reached her, whom Catherine recognized as Travis. He was taller than he was in the picture; his dark black hair was long up to his shoulder blades with thick beard and piercing covering a lot of his face including his lips. He looked like a member of a heavy metal band which was very attracting to Catherine.

Right behind him was Tracy whose hair was longer than Catherine saw in the picture, and she looked even more petite and tanner than before. Catherine couldn't help but check out her body which was very minimally covered by the white tank top and cargo mini skirt. And she also noticed that Sara was quite taken back by the very attractive sight of her ex-girlfriend. Even Catherine had to admit, she was quite a catch.

When she saw that Sara was probably not going to let go of her ex-girlfriend for a while, she turned around to see the siblings, Aaron and Lucille standing with Mia, both of whom were staring intently at their friend. While Aaron was no different from the picture (tall, spiked brown hair, visible tattoos on almost every area of his body), Lucille was totally changed. Her hair was cut shirt like a boy, and it was dyed black and her complexion was a lot paler than Catherine saw in the picture. She looked, there was no other word for it but, grown up.

"You're new," Catherine was slightly shocked when a man's low voice came from her side. She turned to see Travis smiling down at her which made her stand up. "Hi, I'm Travis."

"Catherine, I work with Sara," Catherine smiled taking Travis's hand. While Tracy introduced herself to Catherine, Sara was being squashed between Lucille and Aaron who were refusing to let her go.

"Can't breath guys," Sara said dramatically making them both chuckle. The siblings let go of her friend and Lucille pulled Sara back into her arms for a hug which she probably wanted just for herself.

"I missed you," She said softly in a sad voice. Even Catherine caught the sadness in it.

"I missed you too Luce," Sara patted on her friend's shoulder before breaking the hug. "How have you been?"

"Before you get to asking Luce about her life story, there is someone else here who really missed you," Aaron said with a smile. To Catherine's surprise, his voice was quite feminine. Catherine tilted her body slightly to see who else was in the room.

Standing behind Aaron was an addition to the group whom Catherine hadn't seen in any of Mia's pictures. A little boy, who could not be older than 7 years old. He looked familiar; with brown hair, brown eyes and surely a bit too tall for his age. She saw Sara's expression completely change with the sight of the boy. The boy stepped forward and tilted his head, letting his shoulder length hair wave and his bangs tease his eyes as he did so.

"Hi," The boy said so sweetly it made Catherine's heart melt.

Sara grinned widely at the boy and pulled him into her arms. "Kyle," Sara said softly and held the boy close. It took a while for the brunette to let go of the boy and cup his face. "Look at you all grown up," Sara brushed her hand over Kyle's hair messing it up. "How have you been?"

Catherine looked around the room to see that everyone was giving Sara and Kyle a look which was a bit confusing to her. She moved from her spot to catch a better look at Kyle's face to see if she could see something she had missed before.

"I've been awesome," The boy said with a smile. And that smile threw Catherine off the edge. The boy had the exact set of teeth she had seen on someone else.

Catherine's eyes moved from Kyle to Sara and back to Kyle, both of whom were completely lost in reminiscing with each other. And then her eyes met Mia who was looking straight at her. The younger woman smiled and stepped towards Kyle and turned the boy towards her.

"Catherine, meet Kyle," The boy looked at the blonde and smiled, flashing that identical smile she had seen a million times. "Sara's son."

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**yeah i know, big news right? but i had a major idea for this story so hopefully u guys will be able to enjoy it even with minor detours :) drop in a review, let me know what you think...even if u dont like it**

**thanks for reading...**

**ciaos for now...time for coffee so that i can finish very boring papers...while i do that, why dont you drop in some inspirations in the form of reviews :) thanks again**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

**What do you do when you miss your girlfriend and you get extremely bored? You write...**

**Sorry for any typos...i hope i answered some of the unanswered questions, if not...just ask...and if anything doesnt make sense, please ask too :) ****so here you go...thanks for the reviews guys, and hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1...REVIEW and ENJOY pls...**

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There was silence in the room or what seemed like hours. Catherine could feel all eyes in the room stopping at her while her eyes were glued on Sara who was crouching behind Kyle and avoiding her gaze at all cost. The brunette stood up and hid her face in one hand while the other disappeared into the pocket of her shorts. She was mumbling something softly onto her hand and all Catherine could do was repeat a certain thought in her head over and over again.

_Sara has a son. _Nothing else was even coming closeto brushing that thought away. Her mouth was hanging open and her throat had gone very dry.

"Wha…urm I mean…sara's so…err…uhm…excuse me?" Catherine forced her eyes to move to Mia who was giving her a very concerned look.

"This is Sara's son," Mia repeated her words again.

"Ah," Catherine nodded and turned her head towards Sara again who finally had decided to look at Catherine. "You have a son," She stated to her colleague who sighed heavily.

"Yeah," Sara said softly.

"Right," Catherine bit her lips not knowing what else to say. Then she turned to the boy who was giving everyone a very confused look. "Hey Kyle, I'm Catherine." She waved slightly at the boy who shot his and Sara's signature smile at her.

"Hi," He waved back and pushed her hands into the pocket of his shorts, the same way Sara does. He raised his shoulders a bit and breathed out loudly. "So Mia, where's your play station I can play until Sar and Catherine there talks about whatever this is?" He turned his head to Mia who pointed at her room with a grin. "Thanks," He nodded and hurried to his escape from the grownups.

And silence filled the room again. There were slight movements coming from everyone except Sara and Catherine, both of whom stood staring at each other intently.

"So…you didn't tell her you had a kid?" Lucille patted on Sara's biceps, hoping to cut the tension in the air. "That's sweet." Sara gave her friend a glare which made the girl step back.

"Cath…" Sara turned to Catherine, running her hand over the back of her head.

"Does anyone else in the team know?" Catherine asked a bit sternly than she expected.

"No but…" Sara started to speak again but she was cut short by Catherine again.

"How could you not tell us? Tell ME?" Catherine took a step forward making everyone except Sara take a step away from the two CSIs.

"He's just my BIOLOGICAL son," Sara emphasized on the word at which Catherine squinted angrily. "He's really Lucille and George's son."

"You are not making ANY sense," Catherine waved her hand in the air.

"I got pregnant sometime ago, but I wasn't ready to have a kid back then," Sara explained emphasizing on her words using her hand which to the spectators (everyone except Catherine) was very amusing. "So Lucille and George took him."

"He's still your son Sara," Catherine pointed accusingly at the brunette. "We are supposed to be colleagues. And friends too. So don't you think I deserve to know at least THAT much about you?"

"We have never been on good terms Catherine," Sara pointed out which made the vein on Catherine's forehead even bigger.

"That is your fucking excuse?" Catherine stepped forward again. "I didn't let that fact become a factor when I spilled my heart to you about Alan did I? I did it because I fucking trust you. Because whether we got along or not, I still saw you as my friend." Catherine kept pointed her finger at Sara who was trying very hard not to waiver from her spot. "And this is not even that much of a personal thing, this is me knowing about your family, which I should say, I know NOTHING about."

"Look…" Sara interjected but Catherine shut her up with a glare.

"No you look Sara," Catherine spat roughly. "I know you're a fucking private person. We all are, to some extent. But that doesn't mean we don't share the important things, such as you having a son, from the people you work with. From your friends." The blonde's voice became softer.

"The fact that I have a biological son in another city doesn't change anything Catherine," Sara said wearily. "It's not that big of a deal. It's not like he's with me or anything."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Catherine's voice rose again. "If this is not a big deal, what shit on earth is a big deal for you Sara?"

"I don't know," Sara shrugged roughly. Catherine heard one of the 'spectators' tut in disagreement.

"Do you not trust me or something?" Catherine asked sternly.

"No, of course I do Catherine," Sara held her hand towards Catherine who just frowned.

"It doesn't seem like it Sara," Catherine frowned. There was a silence for a few seconds before the blonde continue. "Remember when I let Keppler do that reverse forensics thing and Nick spat at me that I should have trusted you guys because you all trust me with your lives?" Catherine asked with no intent of getting an answer from Sara. "Well guess what, it is a two way deal. We trust each other with our lives every day. And you can't open your mouth for a minute and tell us the fact that you have a son in San Francisco?"

"He is just my biological son, THAT IS ALL," Sara exasperated loudly.

"THAT STILL MEANS HE IS YOUR SON SARA, so stop with the 'biological' crap," Catherine said even louder than Sara which actually made the brunette take a step back. "And it is important for you to share that little piece of information with the people you work with. Even if YOU think it's not important, normal human being find it important. So deal with it."

"Don't you think you are over reacting Catherine? Sara said with a sigh. Catherine opened her mouth to say something but closed again with disbelief.

"Fuck you Sara," Catherine spat at the brunette and walked past Sara's friends to the front door.

"Cath, come on," Sara called from the living room which Catherine ignored. She slammed the front door behind her and headed to the elevator. She had no idea as to where she was going, she just knew that she wanted to get away from Sara.

While Catherine stepped into the elevator, Sara was trying to get out of Travis's grip so that she could bring Catherine back to the apartment.

"Let me go Trav," Sara said in between gritted teeth.

"You need to let her cool off," Travis said in his low voice and picked Sara up with very less effort and put her in the armchair. "So you sit." He pushed on Sara's shoulders to make her sitting on the chair.

"I got to go and bring her back man," Sara told her friend who was looking down at her sternly. "She's new in the city."

"So? she is a big girl, she will know how to get back if she got lost," Lucille sat on the coffee table right in front of Sara and put her hand on the brunette's thighs. "So meanwhile, we need to talk."

"About what?" Sara spat impatiently.

"What do you mean what?" Lucille said sternly which made Sara calm down a little. "How come no one at your work knows about Kyle?"

"Just because I gave birth to him doesn't mean he is my son, he is your son," Sara tried to explain to everyone her train of thought.

"You giving birth to him makes him your son you bloody idiot," Mia said in disbelief while Aaron sat down next to Lucille and Tracy leaned on Travis who was now standing behind the chair Sara was sitting in.

"You guys adopted him," Sara pointed at Lucille who rolled her eyes. "So technically I'm just an aunt to him now. Well sort of an aunt."

"Oh you're from a whole another planet aren't you sweetie?" Tracy ran her hand over Sara's hair making the brunette frown.

"Look honey, he still is your son. There's a reason why we told Kyle about you remember?" Lucille patted on Sara's thigh. "You shouldn't have kept it from your friends or was it colleagues?"

"Friends," Sara confirmed after a few seconds of thought. "They are all my close friends." She nodded biting her lower lip.

"Well you owe them an apology and a very good explanation too," Aaron pointed out. "It has to be better than this 'just my biological son' thing you got going on here." He waved his hand in front of Sara's face making the brunette sigh.

Everyone around Sara let her mind process whatever was going on in her head. But before Sara could say anything, Mia remembered something.

"Oh wait, how come Catherine doesn't know about Lily?" She asked accusingly making everyone in the room gasp slightly at Sara who scrunched her face.

"Urm…in my defense, Greg and Nick knows about her," Sara said quickly.

"Why not Catherine?" Travis asked curiously.

"I don't know, we fight more than we even talk," Sara wiped her face. "I guess I just didn't see a right time to sit down and talk to her about my social life."

"You found time with these two boys Greg and Nick, so why not her?" Aaron repeated Travis's question. "I mean other than you, she's the only other female in the group right?"

"Yeah she is," Sara nodded. "But I was closer to Greg and Nick even from the start. Me and Catherine started to even talk after that thing that happened with Nick," Her words made everyone nod in understanding. "So I don't know. I just didn't think she would care."

"I don't know her much but from what I have learned from her today, it was pretty obvious that she care a lot about the people close to her," Mia defended Catherine making everyone turn her attention to her. "She doesn't really hide that does she? And it was quite obvious to me from the start that she thinks a big deal about you."

"Look I know I should have told them about Kyle and about Lily to the rest of the team as well," Sara said quickly. "But it's just not my thing you know? It's weird to me."

"We know," Tracy said understandingly. "But when you work with a bunch of people, and trust each other with your lives, you are supposed to step out of your shell and talk a little." He sort of repeated Catherine's words.

"I get it," Sara said angrily since everyone was down to prove her wrong. "But it's not like it's a park ride to me. The only one I really talked to was Lily and then there's you guys, and you know how long it took for me to warm up to you all."

"A year," Travis stated.

"Two months," Tracy said a bit more proudly.

"Year and a half," Aaron said sounding a bit hurt.

"Half a year," Mia frowned seeing that she was being beaten by Tracy.

"Three weeks," Lucille stated proudly. Everyone except Sara gave her a mock loathing look at which she grinned. "I knew what buttons to push." She winked and caressed Sara's thigh softly.

"Going off topic guys," Sara stated with her face hidden in her hands.

"Oh right," Lucille turned back to Sara. "Look, go and talk to her. I'm sure she'll listen to you. It really does sound like she trusts you and she was probably very hurt that you don't trust her enough."

"Plus you have been working together for so long now right?" Mia pointed out. "So maybe it's time for you to warm up to your colleagues, or at least Catherine. She really does care about you Sar." Everyone turned towards her with questioning looks. "What?"

"Why is that you know so much about her?" Aaron asked with a sly grin.

"Because we have been talking the whole bloody morning?" Mia said in an innocent tone. "Plus she's hot, hot chicks gets my attention anytime, anywhere."

"Of course," Tracy rolled her eyes but smiled flirtatiously when Mia winked at her.

"So I should talk to her huh?" Sara asked, grabbing everyone's attention again. Her friends nodded making her scrunch her face in thought as to how she was going to start the conversation. "You know it's not just me who keeps secrets. I didn't know she was engaged until she told me just the other day."

"She's engaged?" Mia said in disbelief making everyone chuckle. "Oh shut up." She rolled her eyes.

"Well she was, but the guy walked out on her," Sara said simply making everyone frown.

"She's quite vulnerable right now huh?" Mia asked softly.

"Don't get any ideas," Sara said warningly making the English girl lift her hands in surrender. "Well I'll just talk to her then. She's a pretty cool friend. I don't really wanna lose her."

"Good girl," Lucille patted on Sara's thigh and got up. "You gotta be a bit open with your friends. Or else you will lose them."

"Learnt my lesson. I'll introduce Kyle to the team sometime during this trip. That's if he doesn't mind," Sara nodded and got up but was pushed back into the chair by Lucille.

"Oh come on, he already sees you as a mother," Lucille said humbly. "The way you will do anything for him, he'll do the same for you." The words made Sara smile. She really did have a son, there was no denying that. "And now, give me your phone."

"Why?" Sara was extremely confused.

"I want to call Catherine," Lucille said simply.

"Why?" Sara asked again.

"Because I know women. And I'm sure she doesn't want to see or talk to you right now," Lucille held her hand for her friend to give her the phone. "So I'm going to talk to her for you. Tell her about Kyle at least," She explained. "But you have to tell her about Lily and anything else you have not told her."

It took a while for Sara to agree to the terms Lucille put forward. After giving it some thought, she gave her phone to Lucille. While her friend called Catherine, Sara leaned back on the chair and closed her eyes, engulfing herself in her own thoughts.

_People should find it so hard to be around me with all the secrets and ignorance they get from me. _Sara thought.

_What was I thinking anyway? As much as I tell myself that I don't have a son, I never believed it myself. So why did I not tell the team about him? What was I scared of? I know for a fact that they will not think any less of me even if they knew. Stupid Sara. _She mentally slapped herself.

_And I didn't even bother to tell anyone about Lily. It feels like a sin right now. If Nick and Greg didn't meet her the same day I did, I'm sure I wouldn't have told them about her either. Wow I'm a horrible person aren't I? _Sara asked herself.

_Lily always said that I should learn to let more people in my life, learn to trust people, learn to talk to people. Why do I never listen? Oh don't open that door. _She chuckled.

_Oh man. Catherine must be really hurt. She did tell me a lot of private things about her. And we did sleep together too, even though we were both drunk. I didn't even think of sharing anything with her. She must hate me right now. _She sighed. _I really like being her friend, and having her as a friend. Losing her is going to suck. _

_I'll just try to change. I got a long time during this trip to talk to Catherine and the rest of the team too. So I can make it up to them now. It will be alright then right? _She took a deep breath. _Hopefully it will. Or else I'm screwed. _

"Okay she's at the Starbucks down the street," Lucille threw Sara's phone into her lap snapping her out of her own thoughts. "I'm going to go talk to her and bring her back, if she's willing to."

"Can you tell her I said I'm really sorry? And I wanna talk to her?" Sara said timidly. Lucille nodded and headed out of the living room. "So what's new?" Sara turned to her friends, all of whom who have made themselves comfortable in the living room while she was busy kicking herself in her own mind.

While Sara caught up with her friends, Lucille walked to the Starbucks to see Catherine sitting at one of the tables outside with what seemed like 3 cups of espressos in front of her. Lucille stepped next to the blonde who was slightly taken back by the invasion of her privacy.

"Hey Catherine, Lucille Stanley," She held her hand to Catherine who shook her hand with a forced smile. "Mind if I join you?"

"No, please," Catherine sat up straight in her chair while Lucille sat in the chair next to her. The other woman saw that all three cups in front of her were empty and she couldn't help notice that all three were double shot espressos.

"Were you really sleepy?" Lucille asked with a genuine smile at which Catherine smirked.

"I had a feeling that I was in a dream," Catherine pulled her hair back. "Hence I needed a wake up kick."

"Makes sense," Lucille nodded. She let a moment of silence filled the air around two of them before she spoke again. "Are you pissed at Sara?"

"Very," Catherine said shortly at which Lucille smiled.

"Understandable," Lucille said shortly. "I don't blame you for being mad. But that's her Catherine."

"I'm sick of people telling me that it is her nature to be like this," Catherine rolled her eyes. "It is my nature to be bitchy, so I'm going to do that now."

"Hey bitchy I can take," Lucille said proudly. "Look why don't I tell you about Kyle? Since he is my adopted son?"

"Sure," Catherine made herself comfortable in the chair.

"Well Sara was a fresh college graduate. And I hadn't seen her for a while because I was just married and that took up my time. We all one day I got a hysterical call from her," Lucille scowled. "When I got to her, all she could show me was the pregnancy test. She wouldn't stop crying and when she did, she wouldn't tell me when or how she got pregnant," She rolled her eyes. "I didn't push the conversation further because I saw that it was a hard time for her. At that time I just did what she wanted me to do, sit and share the silence with her."

Catherine kept listening intently.

"As days passed she was freaking out beyond existence," Lucille continued her story. "We kept telling her that we'd still be with her in any decision she made but she was still freaked. Frankly I thought she was going to get an abortion but I guess seeing the person she is and given her past, Sara couldn't think of getting rid of the baby."

"Ah," Catherine said softly.

"Coincidentally back then, George and I had been trying to conceive, even before we got married but it wasn't working for us. And all the doctors said that due to problems, neither of us could have a baby." Catherine tilted her head sympathetically at which Lucille smiled.

"When it sort of became obvious that George and I couldn't have our own baby, we decided to take Kyle since Sara was telling me how she was not ready and how she would be a bad parent, in short, she was going crazy. And with the hormones, it was a hundred times worse than how she is right now," Lucille shrugged. "So we talked to Sara around 8 months into her pregnancy, and she had no problem with it."

"Of course," Catherine smiled softly.

"Well she never wanted to give up the baby to foster care or put him up for adoption either anyway," Lucille sighed heavily. "I don't blame her."

"Yeah," Catherine nodded thinking of the so many child abuse cases she had seen during her work.

"Things worked out well in the end though Kyle still is Sara's son," Lucille pointed out. "I mean we haven't adopted him legally."

"Why not?" Catherine asked curiously.

"So many reasons actually," Lucille scrunched up her face in thought. "To start with, Sara was living with us after Kyle was born so we didn't really find a reason to do so, coz George thought we should let her bond with the boy a bit."

"And when Sara decided to move to Vegas it was sort of a hurried affair so we didn't even think of it at the time to take care of everything," Lucille explained.

"Would you like something else ma'am?" The waitress interjected Lucille's story making both women from.

"No thanks," Catherine smiled forcedly at the waitress who chirped her way back in. "Sorry about that."

"It's fine. Where was I?" Lucille scratched her cheek. "Oh yeah, hurried affair. Well George and I talked about the adoption when Kyle turned 2 but he kept saying that it wasn't right to take a kid from your friend. It never sat right with him, though he loved Kyle to bits."

"Understandable," Catherine mumbled softly.

"Yeah in the end he did win that argument. So I talked to Sara," Lucille scowled. "I told her that George and I will take care of everything and all she had to do was be his mother, just legally. It took a while for her to agree but I did manage to get her to corporate. And I was his assigned guardian for any school thing so that there will be no problem in that area."

"Well things worked out fine right?" Catherine grinned happily at which Lucille nodded.

"It did, until Kyle realized that in any form we fill, his mother's name was not mine," Lucille grinned cheekily. "Plus he knew Sara so he kept asking one question after the other. It was a hard talk but eventually we sat him down and told him everything. He took it a lot better than we expected. Not a surprise since he's a lot mature than his age. He decided to see it as a plus point that he had two mothers."

"Yeah he did seem a lot more mature for a boy of 7?" Catherine asked curiously.

"He'll be 8 next month but yes he is very mature for his age," Lucille grinned. "Did you know his IQ is 142?"

"Are you serious?" Catherine almost got off his chair.

"I like to boast the fact that my son's a genius," Lucille said proudly.

"That's so cool," Catherine exclaimed like a child.

"It is, thankfully he's not a social outcast," Lucille said even more proudly. "He's quite the unique little gem."

"You're lucky," Catherine nodded.

"I know, he's one of the very best decisions I have made in my life," Lucille sighed. "You have kids?"

"Yeah, one," Catherine smiled and started to tell Lucille about Lindsey. They sat talking about their children for quite a while until the waitress came again to ask if they needed anything. In the end, they ended up ordering two coffees for both of them so that they could enjoy the conversation better.

"She did take Eddie's death hard but she stood strong," Catherine shared with the blonde who listened to her intently. "But now I don't know what has happened to her."

"It's the teenage years," Lucille waved her hand in the air. "And she's a girl. They are extra rebellious than boys, which is scarier if you ask me."

"Oh it is, trust me," Catherine grinned.

"I keep scaring George that since Kyle is developing way faster than his age, he will have to have 'the talk' with him a lot sooner than other dads," Lucille chuckled heartily.

"Hey," Catherine sat up straight in the chair since something poked her mind. "Whose child is Kyle anyway? I mean who's the actual father?"

"Oh we don't know," Lucille shrugged. "All of us had tried to get her to tell us but no luck. Sar just keeps brushing the topic away and if we push it, she gets pissed and leaves the room. Though I think Lily knew. But we never got to hang out with her much so, till today we don't know."

"Damn," Catherine scratched her chin. "Gotta wonder how she ended up in that situation huh?"

"Yeah," Lucille nodded and finished her coffee. "But I'm glad she stepped up and did the right thing than going through something like abortion or giving the baby up to foster care. But I guess seeing her past, I sort of knew she would never do that."

"Why do you keep saying 'seeing her past'?" Catherine asked mimicking the air quotes.

"Well she had a rough childhood right? She was in foster care," Lucille said in a 'duh' tone. "You didn't know that?"

"She never told me," Catherine frowned. "I'm not surprised."

"Hey she's a lot to take when she's a bottle of secrets," Lucille stated calmly. "But she isn't that bad."

"I know, but she's completely oblivious to others feelings at times," Catherine sighed. "It really hurt today."

"Come home," Lucille stood up and stretched. "Give her a piece of your mind and she'll see it."

Catherine looked up at the taller woman smiling down at her, with her hand held forward for Catherine to take which itself made her smile. For some reason, the sun shining brightly from Lucille's back making her hair glow made her look really beautiful. Emptying her last espressos in one shot, Catherine got up and took Lucille's hand following the younger woman back to Mia's place.

While the two blondes lazed their way back to the apartment, Sara was enjoying PS3 with Kyle in Mia's room. Once in a while, one of her friends would come and try to get her to go out to the living room so that they could interrogate her about useless trivia. She was laying on Mia's bed on her stomach while Kyle was sitting on her back, jumping up and down while playing the game, in the process giving the brunette a massage as well.

"Why is this sister of fate so hard to kill?" Kyle groaned when he died for the umpteenth time in God of War.

"It's not that hard honey," Sara grinned as she watched the boy try again. "You just have to jump out of the way when she hits her staff and go hit the mirror when she is stunned."

"I know, but don't you think her clothing is a little distracting?" Kyle complained making Sara laugh. "Plus they made her too strong. Seeing that she is skinny and has no muscle whatsoever, she rationally cannot be that strong."

"Hey skinny women can be very strong too," Sara warned the boy who chuckled.

"Yeah right, I have proof otherwise," Kyle explained. "There's this girl in my class. She's very competitive so she doesn't like the fact that I beat her in every subject. So the other day she punched me in the face, though it felt more like a rub then a punch." He laughed proudly.

"A girl punched you?" Sara turned her head slightly, amused with the boy's stories.

"Yeah, her name's Jesse. And she's so skinny that I sometimes get scared that she might get blown away by the wind," Kyle scowled. "And she really doesn't like me. As if I care."

"That's my boy," Sara high-fived the boy who chuckled and actually managed to beat the boss finally.

"YES, TAKE THAT YOU HALF NAKED, WEIRD LOOKING PAIN IN MY LITTLE TUSHI!" He screamed with joy as they watched the cut scene.

"Excuse me?" Sara laughed at the boy's words so hard that her stomach hurt and she actually was scared that she couldn't breathe any longer.

"I got mom to agree that it's okay if I say 'my tushi' instead of 'my ass'," Kyle said proudly at which all Sara could do was laugh even harder.

Just then, the door opened and the two turned around to see Catherine and Lucille standing at the doorway. As soon as Sara saw Catherine, she quickly got up, throwing Kyle off balance and off the bed.

"Oh bloody hell," Kyle swore loudly making all women turn to him.

"Language," Catherine, Lucille and Sara said in union making the boy very scared as he sat back on the bed.

"Man that's scary," Kyle rolled his eyes and turned to his game.

All women in the room grinned and turned to each other again. Sara smiled at Lucille and turned to Catherine who was watching the boy squirm on the bed while playing the game. She grinned at the scene remembering Lindsey playing with her dolls when she was younger. With that she couldn't help but miss her little girl. Then she looked at Sara, and blues locked with brown. They stood there in silence for more than a minute until Lucille slapped both of them on their biceps.

"Stop being all romantic," She said cheekily making Catherine laugh and Sara blush. Sensing that her job was done, she jumped into bed next to her son and started to annoy the boy who was trying to concentrate.

Sara searched in Catherine's eyes to see if the blonde was still mad at her, but she couldn't figure out anything from those deep blues. When she heard Kyle scream something at the game, she decided that they weren't in the right place to talk at all. She quickly grabbed Catherine's hands and pulled the blonde out of the door.

"Let's talk?" She asked Catherine who nodded and followed the brunette to their room. Sara saw her friends at the end of the hallway, staring at them curiously. She gave them a smile and closed the door behind her and turned to face Catherine who sat down on the bed. "I'm sorry," Those were the first words that escaped her lips.

"For?" Catherine asked simply. Sara scratched the back of her head confusedly since she thought Catherine was involved with everything that happened during the day.

"For all that happened just now," Sara waved her hands in the air. "I should have told you about Kyle and Lily and so many other things. Don't think that I don't trust you Cath, coz I do, a lot. It's just hard for me to tell people about these kinds of things."

"Why?" Catherine again asked simply.

"I don't know. Since I was a kid I never had anyone to share anything that bugged me," Sara shrugged and leaned on the door. "I got pretty used to keeping all the problems to myself since then. Habits like that don't go away just like that you know?"

"Yeah I get that," Catherine nodded. "But Sara these aren't problems. These are general information of you. I don't understand why you couldn't tell me."

"Why didn't you tell me about Alan?" Sara asked, a bit accusingly.

"I don't know, I guess I thought I'll tell you all some other time," Catherine scratched her chin. "And somehow I didn't want to jinx it either."

"Just like that, I don't know how to explain why I didn't tell you about Lily," Sara said softly. "For me I guess it was because I knew from the start how it was going to end, and I didn't want people drowning me in their sympathy or something."

"But…" Catherine tried to interject but Sara cut her short.

"I know you are all my friends," Sara sighed. "But I cannot take people pitying me. It just makes things worse."

"Hey I get it Sar," Catherine raised her hands in surrender. "But you should know that as your friends, it kills us to see you go through something like that all alone."

"I get that too," Sara sighed. "Argh." She hid her face in her hands. Catherine got up from the bed and stepped towards the brunette, taking the cold hands into hers and squeezing them.

"Look you don't have to tell me everything now," Catherine said in a soft, genuine tone. "But I do want to know what is killing you inside. Yes I know something is," She added when she saw Sara roll her eyes. "You have been there for me and I want to be there for you. Here you have your friends but back at home who are there?" She paused.

"Just you guys," Sara answered after some thought. "That's sort of sad huh?"

"It's not," Catherine stepped even closer. "I have friends sure, but they are people whom I meet occasionally for drinks to gossip and trash other people. Not close ones like you and the boys. You guys are the only people I can trust and care deeply about."

"Really? YOU?" Sara asked mockingly making Catherine slapped her cheek softly. But the slap became a caress that made Sara push her face more into Catherine's hand.

"Promise me you'll tell me things when it bothers you?" Catherine asked softly. "And you'll tell me somethings about your past? Things you are comfortable telling me? I really do want to know you Sara, please?"

Sara bit her lips anxiously.

"You're a wonderful person," Catherine squeezed Sara's hands harder. "I want to be closer to you. I really want to be there for you when you need a friend, to hold you when you need it, to keep you company when you feel lonely, to make you laugh when things tend to make you cry and I don't know, to braid your hair when some days turn to be so darn boring too maybe."

Sara chuckled along with the blonde who sighed. "Promise?" Catherine asked again making Sara smile.

"Yeah, but you gotta make that promise right back, deal?" Sara smiled when Catherine nodded to her question. "This somehow feels very childish." Sara said frankly.

"Who cares, so we didn't get to meet when we were growing up to have this conversation back then," Catherine said with a smirk. "Doesn't mean we can't go through this now right?"

"Right," Sara nodded and pulled the blonde into a hug. "Thanks Cath."

"No problem," Catherine rubbed Sara's back and pushed her face harder onto Sara's shoulder. "Anytime you're ready to talk, I'm right here okay?"

Sara didn't answer Catherine and she felt scared as if she had said something wrong. While Catherine scraped through her mind to remember what she said that must have upset Sara, the brunette contemplating if what she was about to do was the best thing or not. Catherine almost pulled away from the hug before Sara spoke again.

"I think I am ready now," Sara broke their embrace and looked into Catherine's eyes. "To tell you somethings."

"Yeah?" Catherine smiled humbly.

"Yeah," Sara nodded and pulled her to the bed and sat down. "You won't treat me any differently when I tell you any of this right?"

"Of course not," Catherine assured the brunette.

"Okay," Sara nodded and took a deep breath, losing herself in thought. "Urm I don't think I can tell you about my childhood just yet."

"It's okay," Catherine smiled. "Just tell me what you think you can tell me."

"Okay," Sara nodded again. "Well, urm let's just say I didn't have a very healthy childhood. And since 18, I pretty much supported myself. And believe it or not, I used to be a bigger social outcast than I am now."

"Hard to believe but go on," Catherine chuckled at which Sara scowled.

"Anyway, I met those idiots back in the hall when I was in college," Sara pointed to the door. "I was much younger than all of them so for them I was like a little sister. Except for Mia who is like my little sister. They helped me take a step out of my shell, just a step."

"One step?" Catherine grinned, enjoying the closeness she was sharing with Sara at the moment.

"Hey it was me, one step for me was like a one giant leap for my whole life, or something like that," Sara frowned while Catherine chuckled. "Anyway I had a group of people looking after me for the first time in life," Sara pursed her lips. "You have no idea how weird it was for me to get used to that. But it was nice. I started to have fun with them, a lot of fun. Tracy was my first ever girlfriend actually. Oh I never told you that I'm gay did I?"

"I guessed," Catherine winked at which Sara chuckled.

"Okay, well I got pregnant with Kyle a few months after I graduated," Sara gulped hard, so hard that Catherine actually heard her. "I swear that was one of the hardest 8 months I had to endure. But it became a lot easy when Lucille decided to take him."

"Can I stop you here? And ask you something?" Catherine took a chance and decided to go for it. "Who's Kyle's dad?"

Sara froze on her spot, her eyes grew wide and she gripped the sheet a bit tight. Catherine scooted closer to Sara and took the brunette's hands and rubbed it softly.

"You can't tell me?" Catherine asked.

"No…urm it's just…err…" Sara stuttered.

"Look it's up to you," Catherine cupped the side of Sara's face. "If you don't want to tell me, you can continue with what you were saying."

Sara took a minute of gulping and fidgeting in her spot before she spoke again. "You can't tell anyone else okay?" Catherine nodded and muffled a painful groan when Sara squeezed her hands quite hard. "I urm…this guy…well…I got raped during a home invasion." Sara said so quickly that Catherine almost didn't catch what she said.

Catherine kept staring at the brunette who was looking down, avoiding eye contact with her at all cost. Catherine made sure that she didn't let go of Sara's hands while she processed the piece of information she had just gotten.

"Oh my…" Catherine mumbled softly. "What…I mean…you…um…you didn't tell anyone about it?"

"My friends knew there was a break in, but I told them that I wasn't home at the time. Only Lily knew about the other part," Sara said softly still not looking up. "I didn't want anyone to know coz I wasn't proud of it."

"Honey that wasn't your fault," Catherine scooted closer to the brunette. "Are you somehow blaming yourself?"

"Urm…I was kind of very drunk," Sara finally looked up, her eyes a bit red. "If I wasn't I could have fought him off."

"It still is not your fault," Catherine said in a very motherly tone. "You weren't drunk at some bar or something, you were in your house. It was entirely his fault. He didn't have to break into someone else's house and...do that. So don't blame yourself." Sara nodded. "You didn't report it?" Catherine asked softly when Sara didn't say anything to what she said.

"No, my memory was a bit hazy in the morning," Sara said looking down again. "I guessed that I would be a shaky witness in that state. So I decided to let it be, plus it was nothing new."

"Honey," Catherine put a finger under Sara's chin and lifted her head. "I'm so sorry."

"It wasn't something you did," Sara mumbled.

"I still am very sorry that you had to go through something like that alone," Catherine said softly. "You are a very strong girl."

"Girl?" Sara managed a chuckle in between sniffs. She looked up and met Catherine's eyes filled with concern. She had seen that look in another pair of eyes and somehow, she was drawn to it. She leaned closer to the blonde who held her hand and the finger under chin all that time.

"Yeah," Catherine whispered softly as Sara leaned closer to her. She could feel Sara's breath on her lips. Her lips parted automatically when Sara's hand ran up her thigh. When she felt Sara lean even closer, Catherine closed her eyes.

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Thanks for reading...drop in a review (or a question if you have any) on your way out :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

**Ok, it's been a long week...turns out telling your best friend everyday that her sister has died is very tiring...anyhows...hope this chapter is ok...i'll try to update really soon...loved the reviews guys, totally motivating...  
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**Thanks kaye...you are a big help in writing this chapter...thanks again**

**Disclaimer: See chapter 1...REVIEW and ENJOY pls...**

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Catherine could feel Sara's hand inch up her thigh. Her mind started to race when she felt Sara's breath grow warmer as she moved closer. Catherine's lips parted on their own accord, her own body leaned forward while her mind was refusing to think rationally. Just then the door opened and both women quickly backed away from each other.

"Hey look dudes, I don't mean to barge in and interrupt you two," Travis paused as he scanned both women who were sitting on the bed looking very awkward. "But I could use someone's help unloading the groceries." He asked with an idiotic grin.

Catherine looked at Sara who licked her lips slightly. The blonde blushed and jumped up from the bed.

"Uhm, I'll help you," Catherine said in a bit of a squeaky voice which made Travis laugh.

Catherine looked at Sara and quickly jumped up. She literally ran out of the door and down the hall quickly with her mind filled with questions she couldn't find the answer to.

_What was that? Was Sara going to kiss me? Me? Again? Why would she want to kiss me? And why was I leaning into it? Am I somehow attracted to her? I mean sure, Sara is quite attractive and we have technically already had sex…no, Catherine stop it. I cannot pursue anything with Sara. We are JUST friends. JUST friends. That's what we both want. _

While Catherine stepped into the living room to get snapped back to reality with Mia and Kyle laughing, Sara was still sitting on the bed with Travis giving her a proud look.

"Nice catch," Travis gave her a thumb up. But when she glared at the man angrily, he quickly walked out of the door, closing it behind him. Sara rolled her eyes and flopped on the bed with a loud sigh.

_What the hell is wrong with me? With us? Seriously Sara, Catherine is your colleague, your friend. You have got to control yourself. But those eyes, I thought I will never see them ever again. The same innocence, the same sincerity, the love, the truth and the care I was so used to. If I didn't know better I would have said that Lily was sitting right beside me, not Catherine. _

Sara rolled over onto her stomach and groaned loudly into the pillow.

_How could someone who has absolutely no relation to another person share so many common traits? Why is…_

Sara kept on groaning until her phone went off, interrupting her train of thought.

"What?" She asked without taking her face out of her pillow.

"Wow, you got out of the wrong side of the bed huh?" Nick's voice came from the other line making Sara roll onto her back again.

"What is it Nick?" Sara asked still irritably.

"Okkkay," Nick chuckled. "So when are we heading out to see the town?"

"Oh right, that's today huh?" Sara sat up and rubbed her eyes. "Urm…why don't you come by Mia's apartment in like 45 minutes? I'll text you the address."

"Alright, we'll meet you guys there then," Nick said cheerfully before hanging up.

Texting Nick the address, Sara walked down the hallway taking a glimpse of Catherine in the kitchen who was ignoring the sniggers coming from Travis who was with her. Taking a deep breath she headed to the living room where Mia, Lucille and Kyle were hanging.

"You look like you've seen a ghost," Lucille pointed out to Sara who scowled and dropped into the seat next to the blonde. Just then, Catherine walked into the room with Travis following her closely from behind with the same stupid grin on his face. Sara rolled her eyes at the man who lifted Kyle and sat down on his spot making the little boy frown.

"That's not fair," He said to Travis who grinned.

"Hey Cath, the guys are gonna be here in 45 minutes to go see the town," Sara said in an awkward tone while Catherine nodded along. "I'm gonna go take a shower. You can take one after I'm done?" Sara stood up and headed to the room quickly when Catherine nodded as an answer.

"Or you could take one with her," Travis nudged Catherine's bicep when he heard Sara closed the bedroom door.

"Excuse me?" Mia asked curiously.

"Yeah, what?" Lucille asked intrigued.

"Nothing, he's being an ass," Catherine rolled her eyes as she turned all her attention to the television.

"She looks damn scary when she does that huh?" Kyle asked Mia who nodded with laughter.

"Nothing? Really?" Travis asked Catherine who scowled. "I walked in on them about to kiss," Travis said to Mia and Lucille like young girl dishing a new piece of gossip for the first time. Lucille and Mia stared at Catherine with half disbelief and half mischievous smiles which made the blonde very uncomfortable.

"We were not about to kiss," Catherine said sternly at Travis who just laughed. "And you might want to watch what you say, we have a kid in the room."

"I'm a big boy Miss Catherine," Kyle said maturely making Catherine raise her eyebrow. "I can handle talking about Sara kissing another woman."

"True but you're not of the age to hear all that honey," Lucille pointed out to Kyle who frowned.

"Yeah, she does have a point dude," Travis nodded along.

"I'm old enough," Kyle stated powerfully. "I'm not a fucking baby."

"Language," Sara's voice came from the hallway making everyone turn their heads to her. She stood at the hallway, her hair wet and sticking to her face which according to Catherine looked very nice.

"Oh please," Kyle rolled his eyes at his birth mother.

"Seriously Kyle, watch your language," Lucille said even more sternly.

"Yo mommies, I am old enough to hear about Sara's love life," Kyle said in a matter-of-fact tone which Catherine had heard Sara used many times. "And I am not a baby anymore. I study and hang out with people who are way older than me. So if I wanna curse, I'm gonna fucking damn curse." Kyle ended a bit proudly. But when he saw Travis looking scared and Lucille, Sara and Catherine giving him the death glare, his smile faded a bit.

"Whoa whoa, first of all I don't have a love life anyone needs to know about," Sara said looking around the room making sure everyone got the idea. "And Kyle buddy, you are not old enough." She sat down next to Travis who was still avoiding the whole conversation.

"I'm seriously getting sick of being treated like a kid when it comes to stuff like this. When it comes to studies, I'm old enough to learn about laws of thermodynamics, but when it's social life, nooooo Kyle is too young," Kyle sighed angrily. "Plus Mia says I can swear so why don't the rest of you think it's okay?"

All eyes in the room turned to the English woman sitting on the couch with an innocent look and avoiding everyone else's eyes.

"Really now?" Lucille asked Mia who grinned nervously.

"Mia?" Sara said in a tell-me-about-it tone.

"Well yeah come on guys, we were all swearing at that age, I know I was," Mia said quickly. "I'm pretty sure you all were too. Hell all bloody kids these days swear."

"That doesn't matter," To everyone's surprise Sara spoke before Lucille could. "He is MY son and he doesn't need to be harming his intelligence with swear words as such a young age." She became all rational making everyone but Catherine roll their eyes. To Sara's annoyance, Catherine was smiling.

_She called him his son._ Catherine thought with a cheeky smile. _She is not just her BIOLOGICAL son. He is her son. She really does care._

But at the moment, Sara was a bit more focused on the task at hand than as to why Catherine was smiling.

"Come on…" Kyle opened his mouth but Catherine interjected the boy.

"If I may butt in, Sara does have a point," Catherine said in a motherly tone. "You are very young. Plus why would you want people to turn their heads away at your language when you can impress them very well with your intellect?"

"Yeah…" Kyle rolled his eyes knowing he wasn't going to win the argument.

"Oh come on, that's a bunch of bloody rubbish," Mia spat in the defense of the boy who decided to sit back and watch the adults rebuttal. "He is a smart boy guys. And if he wants to swear he should be able to pick his wordings and swear whenever he feels necessary. He shouldn't be limited to speak bloody proper all the damn time."

The room fell into a silence while everyone thought about what Mia had just said. Deciding to stay away from the conversation, Catherine excused herself to go take a shower before the guys got there.

"I guess we can't be that much hypocrites," Sara ran her fingers through her wet hair. "But Kyle, you got to use it sparingly. Don't drop the F-bomb and shit whenever you feel like it." She ended in a motherly tone.

"Yeah, like the way she just did," Mia grinned at the boy who laughed cheekily and proudly.

"What?" Sara asked confused as to what her friend was talking about.

"You just said shit," Travis said in between laughs.

"You are not in the conversation dude," Sara threw a pillow at the man. "Why don't you go bug Aaron? Where are the rest of you anyway?" She asked realizing that some of her group was missing.

"They went to get some coffee," Lucille said getting up. "I'm supposed to join them now so I'm going to get going now." She placed a kiss on Kyle's face as the boy hugged her. "Behave okay mister?"

"Of course mom, you know it," Kyle winked at his mother who laughed.

"Come on Trav, let's go," Lucille pulled the man out of the couch and dragged him out while he complained about outside being bad.

"So I can swear right? I got the official permission?" Kyle asked hopefully.

"Yeah, you can curse, just keep it in moderation around your mommies and you'll be good," Mia said cheekily.

"YES!" Kyle exclaimed as he jumped off the couch and ran to Mia's room.

"Hey buddy, where are you going?" Sara called getting up.

"Going to whoop some biotchy asses in God of War, duh?" Kyle shouted before closing the door behind him.

"I'm going to get back at you for allowing him to do that," Sara pointed an evil finger at the English woman who laughed heartily. Sara rolled her eyes and headed down the hallway and entered Mia's room to see Kyle concentrating on his game. "Sweetie you wanna go out with me and Catherine? And some other friends of mine?"

"Friends as in like Trav and them?" Kyle asked without taking his eyes off the screen.

"No, friends from work," Sara said leaning against the doorframe and digging her hands into her short's pocket.

"Urm…why?" Kyle asked scrunching up his face in thought, whether because of the game or because of Sara, no one could know.

"Well because the last time I spent any time with you was last year for just one day," Sara said in a playful tone as she slyly made her way to the bed. She waited for the right time and started to tickle the young boy. "You maybe be 'all grown up' but you are still small enough for me to do this. So what do you say?" Sara said while she made sure the boy couldn't get out of her grip.

"Okay, okay. Stop tickling me," Kyle shouted but Sara refused to stop. "UNCLE! UNCLE AARON! HELP!" Kyle cried through his laughter.

"You are calling someone who's not here honey, remember?" Sara laughed.

"STOP…PLEASE!" Kyle shouted loudly. "CAN'T…BREATHE…" He said dramatically making Sara give in. "You're mean." He said to Sara who laughed while he caught his breath.

"So you'll come?" Sara asked raising her eyebrows and lifting her hand in a tickling motion.

"I'll come, I'll come," Kyle said and turned to his game again when Sara stood up and headed out of the room.

"Hey go get ready now then," Sara said from the doorway making Kyle frown. "The guy's will be here any minute so get your tushi moving now mister."

"Fine," Kyle pulled his tongue out at Sara before saving the game and heading to the bathroom in the room.

Sara closed the door to Mia's room and headed to her room in order to change to something more comfortable. She put on her beach shorts and took off the t-shirt while searching for her tank top. Catherine walked out of the bathroom just when Sara pulled the white tank top out of her bag. The brunette's eyes stopped at Catherine who was blushing furiously since all that was covering her body was the towel wrapped around her.

"Urm…the guys will be here soon," Sara said gulping down a lump in her throat. Her eyes wandered from Catherine's head to toe while the blonde did the same to her.

"Okay," Catherine grabbed her clothes that were laid out on the bed and hurried back into the shower.

"Damn…" Sara sighed and put on her tank top. Ignoring the images that were getting more vivid in her mind with every minute, she grabbed her button up white shirt and headed out of the room.

"You alright there love?" Mia asked from the couch when she saw Sara appear from the hallway.

"Yeah," Sara smiled with a lot of effort and sat down on the couch. "We'll be out of your hair soon when the guys get here."

"Awesome," Mia stretched with a yawn. "I think I'm going to catch a nap while you all are out."

"Sweet dreams then," Sara placed a kiss on her friend's forehead and headed into the kitchen to get some water.

"Yeah I'll try not to fall out of the bed," Mia called from the living room with a soft laugh.

"SHUT UP," Sara called as her ears grew hot.

When Sara stepped back into the living room, Kyle was sitting on the coffee table going through a car magazine.

"Ready?" Sara asked Kyle who nodded. Just then, Catherine walked into the living room wearing a sun dress, her hair let down and sunglasses pushed up into her hair. "A sundress? Really?" Sara asked with her mouth slightly hanging open and smiling cheekily at the same time.

"Yeah why not?" Catherine asked with a sarcastic frown. "I won't get to wear it to work ever, so why not wear it on vacation?"

"Sure, I guess that makes sense," Sara nodded, looking the blonde from head to toe.

"What?" Catherine asked seeing as to how unsubtly Sara as checking her out. "Does it look bad?" She twirled around showing Sara her back at the same time.

"No no, I didn't say that," Sara said quickly. "It looks…good, really good. Great actually." Sara emphasized making Catherine blush slightly.

"Subtle Sar," Kyle nudged the brunette making the two women even more uncomfortable. They were saved by the bell when Sara's phone rang.

"Hey Sar, we're here," Nick's loud and cheerful voice made Sara feel much more at ease.

"Ok, park the car and wait for us," Sara grabbed her keys from the hook and motioned Catherine and Kyle to head out of the front door. "We're just coming down."

"Why are we parking the car?" Nick asked curiously.

"Because we don't need a car, we are walking," Sara waved bye to Mia who sent her a flying kiss before she closed and locked the door behind her.

"Walking? But its hot Sar," Nick whined like a little boy.

"Oh for the love of God, you sound just like Greg," Sara rolled her eyes. "It's not hotter here then it is in Vegas, so quit whining. We're just coming down."

"Fine," Nick said with a sigh and hung up. She turned around to see Kyle and Catherine standing in front of the elevator waiting for her.

"Shall we?" Sara pressed the button and motioned to Catherine and Kyle who stepped in before her.

"So what are we doing today?" Kyle asked leaning on the elevator wall.

"Nothing much," Sara shrugged. "Just see the town, hit the beach and stuff like that. Is there something you want to do specifically?" She asked the boy who scrunched his face in thought.

"I don't know, let me think," He said with a smile. The elevator door opened while Kyle kept thinking and the boy followed the two women to the sidewalk. There leaning on their car stood Warrick, Greg and Nick looking extremely like tourists.

"Hey girls," Warrick called cheerfully when he saw them reach where they were standing. "How's it going?"

"Great great," Sara grinned and messed with Greg's hair making the younger man get away from her arm's length. Nick put an arm around Catherine and complimented her dress while Kyle watched.

"So you guys ready?" Sara asked clapping her hands together.

"Oh yeah, ready to hit the town and score with some hot babes," Greg piped up making everyone chuckle.

"You won't be getting anything," Warrick joked.

"Oh that's what you think," Greg scowled. "I'll be getting myself a hot honey before I go back."

"Isn't that supposed to be my line?" Warrick asked making Nick laugh out loud.

"No one can have ownership over a line or phrase," Kyle interjected making his presence known. All men stared at the kid they hadn't noticed a second ago while Catherine and Sara watched the guy's reaction to the little genius. "But people can be known for saying something." He finished his sentence making Nick, Warrick and Greg exchange very confused looks.

"Who's this little guy?" Nick stepped forward and looked from Catherine to Sara, hoping to get an answer from either woman.

"That's Kyle," Sara said and cleared her throat. "My son."

Then there was a silence. Kyle looked at Catherine who raised an eyebrow. The boy shrugged and grinned to Sara who bit her lip anxiously. While they kept wondering how the guys would react, the three male CSIs kept staring at Kyle, noticing the familiarity between the boy and their friend. It took a minute or so before either of them spoke. And when they spoke, they spoke together.

"Son?" They chorused.

"Yeah, I'm her son. She gave me to her best friend and her husband when I was born because she wasn't ready to have a kid yet," Kyle stepped forward before Sara could say anything. Both Catherine and Sara stared at the boy who had taken matters to his own hands. "It's great for me. I don't feel bad or neglected at all because I have two mothers and a father loving and taking care of me. Any questions?" He finished and looked at all men who stood with their mouth's hanging open a bit.

"Ok I'll believe that he's your son," Warrick turned to Sara who grinned.

"Yeah, this is so cool," Nick said excitedly. "It's like we have a little nephew all of a sudden."

"Why do I have a feeling this boy is going to grow up to be a second Sara?" Greg asked Catherine who smiled. "That is scary."

"Why's that?" Kyle asked not getting the point.

"You have a lot to learn my man," Warrick put an arm around the boy who looked up to the tower of a man standing next to him. "For now, why don't we hit the town?"

"Sounds good," Catherine nodded and put an arm around Nick's waist who had his arm around the blonde's shoulder. Sara lead the way down the road and by a park where Greg, Warrick and Nick decided to play a game of Tag. Kyle, Catherine and Sara sat at a bench nearby watching the overgrown babies run around in the park.

"Are they injured? In the head?" Kyle asked as he couldn't understand why a bunch of grownups were acting like little kids.

"No honey, that's just how they are," Catherine laughed when Warrick lifted Greg over his shoulders and threw him on the ground. "Ow that has got to hurt."

"Guess not," Sara laughed when Greg stood right back and ran after Warrick.

"So where are we headed today anyway?" Catherine asked Sara.

"Well there's a small coffee shop I used to go a lot, so I thought we'd stop there first," Sara shrugged and turned to Catherine who was staring at her all that time. "Then maybe hang out at the beach or something?"

"Sounds like a good way to ease into the city," Catherine smiled letting her hair wave in the air and staring at Sara without even blinking.

"Yeah," Sara stared at the woman appreciating just how beautiful Catherine was. She couldn't believe that she had not noticed the beauty that had been around her all this time.

Kyle who was sitting in between the two women took a glance from Catherine to Sara and back to Catherine to see that both of them were lost in each other's eyes.

"Urm…are you guys dating or something?" Kyle asked not knowing what else to say.

"No," Catherine and Sara said together as they snapped out of their thoughts. Kyle hummed in disbelief while Catherine and Sara tried to find something other than each other's eyes to stare at.

"Sooo…" Kyle broke the awkward silence again. "Are we going to Joe's?" Kyle asked.

"Yeah, we should get going," Sara stood up and went to get the guys so that they could go. It took a while for the brunette to get the guys to cooperate. But soon enough, they rounded the corner and entered a small coffee shop. It was a homey place. It smelled of coffee sure, but it was not overly tacky with a memorabilia of a certain themes. It was just homey and looked very welcoming to tourists. They grabbed a table and sat down.

"I'll go get us some drinks, what do you want?" Catherine asked the men who all chipped in their preferences. "Okay, I'll be right back. You guys chat."

"I'll help you," Sara stood up while Catherine headed into the café. "What?" She asked when the three men gave her an unbelieving look.

"You're helping Catherine?" Did you hit your head?" Greg asked seriously.

"No, I'm just being nice," Sara asked raising an eyebrow. "There is no way she can carry 6 drinks by herself."

"Well you two being nice to each other is like water and oil mixing," Warrick butted in making Sara roll her eyes.

"Ha-ha, very funny," She said sarcastically.

"Seriously, you sure you didn't hit your head?" Greg asked, even more serious than before.

"She didn't hit her head," Kyle said loudly. "But Mia said she fell out of the bed again."

"Again?" Warrick howled with laughter while the rest of the group was too busy trying to catch their breath from laughter. Sara rolled her eyes and glared at Kyle who smiled innocently. She was just about to open her mouth to say something when she felt someone touch her back.

"Now now, why are you making the girl feel bad?" Catherine asked the guys rhetorically. "You want to help me get the drinks?" She asked Sara who nodded and followed the blonde in. After they got the drinks, they sat down and talked. It was mostly about the guys getting to know about Kyle and to get inside information on how Sara used to be like before she went to Vegas. After about an hour of sitting and talking about almost all random subjects, Kyle started to get anxious.

"Can we go somewhere else now? Plllleeeeeeeaaaaaassssseeee?" Kyle whined sounding very much like a kid for a change.

"Okay, okay we'll go to the beach," Sara laughed along with the others. "It's just around the corner anyway."

The paid their bill and headed down the road. They had to walk down the sidewalk two by to so that others could still get around them. Sara and Catherine lead the way with Greg and Kyle right behind them talking about video games and Warrick and Nick bringing out the rear, talking about football. Since she was wearing a dress, Catherine was swinging her arms back and forth as she walked. As they rounded the corner to the beach, Catherine's hand landed in Sara's and the brunette automatically held it as they walked.

"Oooooo, Sara and Catherine sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G," Kyle sang, again sounding very out of character. But to Sara, it looked nice since she barely see the boy acting like a child. When Sara saw the guys draw attention to Kyle pointing at her and Catherine's entwined hands, she quickly pulled her hand away and shoved her hand into her pocket. Catherine on the other hand wrapped her arms around her waist and acted as if nothing has happened. Before the guys could comment on it, Sara hurried her steps so that they would reach the beach which would prove as a good distraction.

"Well there's the beach," She said quickly and nervously. "You can tan, play volleyball, talk, walk around, walk in the water, sleep, drop dead, whatever you want." Sara ended confidently and with a smile.

"Drop dead?" Kyle asked in a hurt tone.

"Oh that's not at you buddy," Sara ran her hands over Kyle's hair, messing up his well kept style. "So what do you want to do?"

"Can I hang out with Greg?" Kyle asked with a hopeful smile. Sara looked at Greg who was giving her almost the same look as Kyle. She looked at her deadly and nodded hesitantly.

"Wow, it's like the blind leading the blind huh?" Warrick asked laughing. "Who's watching who?" The rest of the group laughed while Greg scowled and lead Kyle to the sea.

"Well I'm going to swim," Warrick said pulling his shirt over his head revealing his well kept body.

"I think I'll second that," Nick said following Warrick's suit. "Race you to the water?" He asked with a cheerful grin as he threw his shirt on the sand.

"I could beat you to the water," Warrick grinned confidently.

"20 bucks?" Nick bet excitedly.

"You're on," Warrick clapped his hands. "Go," he shouted and took off.

"Not fair," Nick shouted as he followed right behind him.

"Men," Catherine shook her head with a smile.

"You said it," Sara laughed and turned to the blonde. "So what do you want to do?"

"Well I wanted to do that," Catherine pointed to someone who was wakeboarding along the shore. "But since I'm wearing a dress, maybe some other day."

"Smart," Sara nodded. "How about we take a short walk? It's a beautiful beach really."

"Sure I'd like that," Catherine nodded and followed Sara's lead alongside the shore. She watched Sara's eyes twinkle as the brunette took in the sight of the ocean. "You really like it here huh?"

"Yeah," Sara turned to Catherine letting their eyes meet for a while before turning back to the ocean. "The beach used to be my haven. Anytime something shitty happened, I could come here and the ocean always managed to wash part of all that away from me."

"That makes sense," Catherine took in a deep breath.

"Plus the beach is always a nice place to have sex in," Sara chuckled making Catherine stop at her tracks. She turned to face a shocked looking blonde. "What?" She asked innocently.

"You have had sex on the beach?" Catherine asked with her hands on her hips.

"Yeah, you haven't?" Sara asked in shock.

"No," Catherine said with a frown. "How's it like?"

"It's…something," Sara licked her lips as she let the memories flood her mind. She was brought back to reality when Catherine snapped her fingers in front of her face.

"Come back," Catherine grinned. "I'll say that must be one hell of a memory to have you blush by just thinking about it."

"I'm not blushing," Sara wiped her cheeks. "It's the sun."

"Uh huh," Catherine smiled coyly.

"Oh shut up," Sara turned around and started to walk with Catherine following right behind her. "So how's Lindsey?" She changed the subject completely.

"Being Lindsey," Catherine sighed. "She's happy that she's staying with my sister. Other than that, I have no idea."

"She's still being distant?" Sara asked cautiously.

"Yeah, but I have decided to give her the distance she so badly wants," Catherine said as if holding in puke. "I'm going to hope that she gets over this teenage rebellious phase."

"She will, we all do," Sara shrugged. "I'd love to see how Lucille handles Kyle when he reaches the age."

"You will have to deal with it too you know," Catherine pointed out to Sara who stopped at her tracks.

"Oh crap," Sara said as the realization hit.

"Don't worry honey, you'll be great," Catherine rubbed Sara's back comfortingly.

Sara smiled thankfully at the blonde and kept walking. They walked in silence for a while before Sara stopped and stretched her body.

"Wanna sit here for a while?" Sara asked hopefully.

"Thank you," Catherine sighed heavily. "My feet are sort of killing me."

"Cool," Sara sat down and stared at the ocean in front of her, taking in the beauty of it. Catherine however laid on her stomach and closed her eyes. Sara smiled and went back to staring at the ocean. She always liked the way the ocean breeze felt on her face, the taste of salt in the air and even the sound of waves crashing on the beach. It was so peaceful that she could keep staring it all day without getting bored. She sat there for a while before laying on her back and closed her eyes just like Catherine.

Almost an hour passed with the two women laying on the beach. Catherine had actually fallen asleep while Sara day dreamed. While they were lost in their own worlds, Kyle and Greg sneaked up behind them. Kyle looked at Greg as they tip-toed behind the two women. Kyle indicated, 1-2-3 on his fingers before leaping on Sara and tickling the brunette while Greg leaped on Catherine and did the same. Kyle was only able to tickle Sara for a few seconds before he was flipped over onto his back and Sara tickled him. While Sara enjoyed the encounter, Catherine wasn't too enthused with Greg.

"GREG," Catherine screamed on top of her voice, loud enough for the whole beach to hear. "Get…off…of…me…NOW!" She said loud and irritably. Greg quickly scurried to his feet and stepped away from the blonde while Kyle laughed at the man.

"I think you got the easy one," Greg pouted and crossed his arms over his stomach.

"Not really, Sara would have easily killed you," Kyle said as he got up and brushed the sand off of him. "Catherine would have done that." He pointed at the blonde who was glaring at Greg very angrily.

"You're too smart for your own good," Greg kept pouting and avoiding Catherine's evil stares.

"We all know that," Kyle exclaimed as Sara stood up and pulled Catherine up along with her. Catherine tried to brush the sand off her dress as Nick and Warrick ran up to them.

"What's going on?" Nick asked a little out of breath.

"I was proving a theory of mine," Kyle grinned while Greg looked at him confusedly. "When a little boy tickles a woman, it's cute but when a grown man does it, it's not as cute." He said proudly.

"You knew she was going to be pissed?" Greg looked at the boy slightly shocked.

"You didn't?" Warrick asked Greg in disbelief.

"Well I thought she would find it funny," Greg shrugged making Catherine glare at him once again.

"Of course she was going to be pissed," Kyle said in a matter-of-fact tone and flashing his gap tooth grin, same as Sara. "And I was hoping that she would kick your ass."

"I'm still thinking about it," Catherine said, finally getting all the sand off of her.

"Well before Cath makes up her mind, what say we go get something to eat?" Nick asked since it was almost sun down by then. Everyone nodded in agreement and headed to the road, with Greg receiving a very painful slap on the back of his head by Catherine.

They headed down the road to the restaurant, which according to Sara was nearby, with the two women bringing up the rear of the group this time. Sara saw that while Catherine had managed to get off the sand off her front, there was a patch of white on her back.

"You got some sand on you still," Sara stopped Catherine at her tracks and brushed her hand over the blonde's back getting the sand off her. For some reason, she kept rubbing Catherine's back, teasing the blonde's neck line in the process even after the sand was all gone.

"Mmmm…" Catherine hummed softly since she liked the fact that someone was playing with her back. But when Catherine hummed softly, Sara realized what she was doing and stepped back.

"All gone," She gulped down loudly and smiled at Catherine who turned around.

"Thanks," Catherine smiled softly hiding the fact that she really liked the contact. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, just hungry," Sara lied through her teeth and hurried behind the guys. After taking a moment, Catherine followed her as well.

"So what's your mom's name?" Catherine heard Greg ask Kyle who started to tell everything about his family.

That was when she decided that Sara's work family needed to meet her actually family as well.

"Hey Sar, can I borrow your phone?" Catherine asked the brunette who looked at her confusedly. "My battery's low and I need to call my sister to check up on Lindsey."

"Ok sure," Sara nodded and handed over the phone. Catherine excused herself and walked outside and called Mia from Sara's phone.

"Yes my love," Mia's cheerful voice answered the phone.

"Mia? It's Cath," She started the conversation.

While Catherine invited Mia and the gang to the restaurant, Sara was watching the blonde talking on the phone from inside the restaurant.

"You are staring at Catherine, seriously is the world coming to an end?" Greg asked curiously.

"I'm just wondering why she's taking so long," Sara said under her breath and taking her eyes off Catherine.

"Really?" Nick asked as curiously as Greg. "Coz it really seem like you two got something going on."

"There is nothing going on between me and her except friendship," Sara sighed heavily. "So would you drop it?"

Nick and Greg raised their hands in surrender making Sara smiled with relief.

"So Sara, are you going to ask Catherine out or something?" Kyle asked simply, throwing Sara off guard.

"WHAT? No, of course not," Sara choked on her water. "She's just my friend buddy, nothing else."

"Okay," Kyle said not convinced at her mother's words. Just then Catherine walked in and sat down next to Sara, giving the brunette back her phone.

"Linds doing good?" Warrick asked.

"What? Oh yeah she's fine," Catherine said shortly.

They ordered their food and were contemplating on how Grissom might be spending the holiday when Sara saw a group of familiar faces walk into the restaurant.

"HEY," Sara called the guys who waved back. "What are you guys doing here?"

"Cath invited us," Mia pointed to the blonde who smiled. Sara raised an eyebrow at Catherine who just tilted her head with a smile.

"I thought it would be fun to have them meet the guys," She said genuinely at which Sara smiled. She had always wanted to introduce both her families to each other and somehow Catherine had found a way for her to do just that.

"Ok well guys, that's Travis, Tracy, Mia and that's Aaron and that would be Lucille, Kyle's mom," Sara pointed at them respectively. "And you lot, this is Greg, Nick and Warrick."

After the two groups had shaken each other's hands and exchanged their 'hellos' and Lucille had kissed Kyle on his forehead, they all settled down at the table. The waitress came and took the orders for the newcomers and gave them a chance to talk.

"So you guys work with Sara?" Tracy asked Greg in particular making Sara grin.

"Yeah we do," Greg answered in the same flirtatious tone as Tracy's.

"Ah," Lucille said in a disappointed tone.

"What?" Nick asked Lucille at her lack of response.

"Well she's no fun when she works," Lucille said simply while the waitress put their food in front of them. "So you guys only see the boring side of her."

"There's a fun side to her?" Greg asked curiously.

"Exactly my point," Lucille laughed while she helped Kyle cut her food.

"Can we please NOT talk about me?" Sara said irritably.

"Okay, okay," Lucille raised a hand in surrender.

The rest of the group started to eat while Catherine stared at her plate and sat without eating.

"Are you okay?" Sara asked putting an arm around Catherine's waist.

"Yeah," Catherine nodded. "There's too much tomato in this and I don't like tomatoes at all."

"Well why don't you scrape them onto my plate?" Sara suggested. "I love tomatoes."

"Yeah?" Catherine asked Sara who nodded in agreement.

While Catherine and Sara exchanged tomatoes, they didn't realize that the rest of the table was staring at them with extreme excitement. When the women were done and looked around the table to see all eyes at them, they frowned.

"What?" They asked in union.

"You two make a very cute couple," Tracy said with a huge grin making everyone nod in agreement. Sara hid her face in her hands while Catherine blushed and choked on her coke.

"Excuse me?" Catherine asked in between coughs.

"Can we please drop this?" Sara said in a worn out tone. "Seriously, there's nothing going on between the both of us."

"Yeah there isn't," Catherine said sternly making everyone at the table laugh.

"And just for your information, this is still talking about me," Sara stared down her friends with just a look.

"Scary," Greg sang as he watched the brunette's glare.

With nothing else to talk about, they ate in silence at first. But with Kyle talking about the most random and interest things ever, the conversations pretty much turned to Kyle and all about him. After finishing their meals, they sat and talked about work, Sara and even football. They enjoyed each other's company until nearly 10 o'clock. At that time, Kyle was slowly falling asleep on Lucille so she and Aaron decided to take him home. And since they had planned to go meet a friend of Warrick's in the morning, the CSIs left too. That left Mia, Catherine and Sara alone.

"So what are you two up to tonight?" Mia asked as she helped herself to the last of her coffee. "Hitting a club or something?"

"I'm beat," Catherine stretched her body letting Mia get a clear glimpse of her well toned body. Sara saw Mia raise an intrigued eyebrow at her. Sara stared her down making Catherine a bit curious. "What?"

"Nothing," Sara and Mia said in union.

"Okay I got to head off to work," Mia stood up and grabbed her jacket. "You two try to behave now." Mia winked and left the two women alone.

"So, what now?" Sara asked after a few seconds of silence.

"How about we head home too?" Catherine yawned.

"Sure sounds good," Sara slid out of the booth and waited for Catherine to do the same. Just as she slid out of the booth, Catherine tripped on the leg of the table and fell into Sara's arms. "Whoa whoa, careful there."

"Oh, sorry," Catherine held Sara's shoulders and looked up at the brunette smiling down at her. After staring into the deep browns for a few seconds, she quickly backed away from Sara. But to her surprise, Sara kept staring at her.

"Are you done staring at me now?" Catherine asked cheekily making Sara look away really fast.

"Yeah, yeah, let's go home," Sara turned around quickly and headed out of the restaurant.

The two walked home in silence, enjoying the cool air and beautiful full moon shining in the sky. And both women were enjoying each other's company even when neither of them were saying anything at all. It seemed like a very comfortable and comforting silence for both of them. Even with both their minds filled with problems, Catherine of Alan and Sara of Lily, they felt at ease.

When they got into the apartment, both of them headed straight to their room. While Catherine jumped into the shower, Sara stripped off her clothes and laid out across the bed. She could hear Catherine sing in the shower which made her smile. It reminded her of all the time she laid in bed listening to Lily sing in the shower. Her thoughts once again got conquered by her ex girlfriend and how much Catherine reminded her of Lily. She was lost in those thoughts when she was interrupted by Catherine standing at the end of the bed in a tank top and panties. Sara took a sharp intake of breath at the sight making Catherine tilt her head coyly.

"Mind if I join you?" Catherine asked the brunette in a flirtatious tone.

Sara nodded and moved over giving Catherine some room. The blonde jumped into bed and hugged the nearby pillow and rolled onto her side facing Sara who was laying on her back.

"I had fun today Sar, thanks," Catherine said snuggling into her spot.

"I'm glad you did, I had a lot of fun too," Sara smiled and turned her head to Catherine, pushing a hair off of Catherine's hair. "Can I ask you something?" She asked Catherine who nodded. "Why did you invite Mia and them?"

"Well you seem to be living this double life, one here and one in Vegas," Catherine said with a snigger making Sara laugh. "So I thought I'll just bring you a step closer to make both lives one."

"That's a nice way to put it," Sara smiled and licked her lips. "Thanks, I have been meaning to get you guys together for a while now."

"You're welcome honey." Catherine smiled while Sara kept playing with her hair. With that the blonde closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"Good night Cath," Sara said softly before taking her hands off Catherine's hair. But Catherine took the brunette's hand and kept it in place.

"Keep doing that, it feels good," Catherine said through a yawn.

"Okay," Sara continued playing with Catherine's hair until she fell asleep. _Today was good, really good. _Sara thought as she herself dozed off slowly into a deep sleep.

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**thanks for reading...****drop in a review pls so i know how i'm doing...thanks again**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

**It's a bit shorter than other chapters...some might not accept what happens in the chapter but i still hope you like it...**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1...REVIEW and ENJOY pls...**

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Sara sat in the bed, leaning on the headboard and stretching her legs comfortably. Next to her, Catherine was sleeping soundly, using Sara's legs as a snuggly pillow. The brunette had been up since 3 am, unable to fall back asleep. She had given up the hope to get any extra sleep and had taken a book from Mia's collection to pass her time until at least Mia comes home. She was however getting distracted from the book by the blonde next to her kissing and rubbing her thighs in her sleep.

Sara had almost reached half of the book when she felt Catherine stir in her sleep. The blonde's grip on her thigh became so hard that her nails dug into her skin. Catherine's face was scrunched with fear when Sara felt wetness on her skin. Realizing what was going on, Sara quickly put the book down and ran her hand over Catherine's head.

"Cath?" Sara said softly, her lips almost touching the blonde's cheek. "Catherine. Wake up." She shook Catherine slightly trying to snap the blonde out of whatever she was experiencing. But Catherine kept holding Sara's thighs for her dear life and crying softly in her sleep.

"CATH," Sara shook Catherine more vigorously, finally making the blonde snap out of her sleep. She sat up quickly and looked around and finally focused her eyes on a very concerned Sara. "What's wrong?" Sara asked in a worried tone.

"Okay, okay," Catherine quickly turned her back to Sara and wiped her face. "I'm okay."

"You're obviously not okay," Sara slipped closer to Catherine sitting right behind the blonde. "Come on, talk to me."

"No it's fine," Catherine said stubbornly.

"You know I'm not going to let it go until you tell me," Sara got closer to Catherine and put her chin on Catherine's shoulder. "Please tell me?"

Catherine turned her head slightly showing the brunette her puffy red eyes and smiled in between her sniffs. "You're a pain in the ass when you become all over protective you know that?" Catherine smiled making Sara grin cheekily.

Sara forced Catherine to face her and took the blonde's very cold hands in hers.

"Bad dream?" Sara asked taking a wild guess.

"Yeah I actually haven't been able to have a good night's sleep after Alan left," Catherine said very slowly. "It becomes worse with every night you know?"

"Maybe you just need to talk about it so that it's not stuck in your subconscious all the time," Sara suggested quietly knowing just how hard it was to do that.

"They all leave or cheat or die," Catherine said without any delay as if the weight on her was slowly killing her. "And I'm always left to pick myself all by myself. No one is ever there to help me walk on my feet after being beaten down to my knees."

Sara tightened her grip on Catherine's hands silently telling her that she was there for her friend. She squinted her eyes to see that Catherine was avoiding her gaze completely.

"People expect me to be strong, to smile when it hurts so much that I cry to sleep most nights," Catherine took a deep breath with extreme difficulty. "How do people just walk away and expect the other person to be as calm and casual as them? And they leave without giving any kind of explanation whatsoever. Where do people find the courage to just turn their backs to the people who are ready to do almost anything for them?"

Sara shrugged which told Catherine that she should continue talking.

"I don't know what I did wrong with Alan," Catherine shook her head in thought and bit her lip. "We had a good thing going. Actually, a great thing. We barely fought, we had fun even if we didn't try, he and Lindsey were getting along swimmingly, and our sex life was good. So I don't understand what I did wrong, what else could have I done for him that would have stopped him from walking away from me?"

"Hey are you blaming yourself for this?" Sara asked quickly.

"What else could it be?" Catherine asked, finally looking up at the brunette. "I must have somehow not given him something he wanted or needed."

"Hey hey, that's not true," Sara said looking straight into Catherine's eyes. "Just because he couldn't see you as something so beautiful and irreplaceable that doesn't mean it was your fault."

Catherine shook her head as a fit of cries hit her again.

"You have to understand that this is not your fault Cath," Sara insisted. "You are a wonderful person and I can bet that Alan or anyone else can never find someone half as good as you. He left because of his own problems, not because you did or didn't do anything."

"If I am that good, why did he just leave?" Catherine asked the question Sara didn't have answer to.

"Because he's an idiot," Sara said simply. "Look Cath just because he got cold feet or whatever, that doesn't mean there will not come someone who wouldn't see you for the wonder you are."

"No…" Catherine shook her head vigorously.

"Trust me, you think that you won't be happy or that you can't live without him," Sara pulled Catherine closer to her. "But you will learn to walk again and I promise you that you won't have to get up by yourself this time. I will help you stand up and walk, and walk beside you as long as you want."

Catherine looked up at Sara again, losing herself in the concerned deep browns in front of her. Automatically, she slid into Sara's arms and buried her face in the brunette's chest. Sara wrapped her arms around Catherine's body and placed a kiss on the top f her head.

"You just have to let me help you," Sara said softly. "I promise I won't let go of your hand until you are ready to give that hand to someone who will never let go of it okay?"

Catherine didn't say anything but she just kept sobbing softly onto Sara's chest. And the brunette let her do that. She didn't say anything else, she just listened to the muffled cries of her friend. It was breaking her heart softly to see how much she was hurting. And it was angering her that someone had hurt Catherine that much too. Subconsciously she was planning this Alan character's murder which scarily enough didn't scare her. They sat on the bed for good five minutes with Sara holding Catherine in complete silence except for the silent sobs escaping Catherine's lips.

"Why do you have to let go of it?" Catherine asked softly. So softly that Sara almost didn't hear her.

"Urm…what?" Sara asked not understanding what Catherine was talking about.

"Do you have to let go of my hand?" Catherine lifted her head and looked straight into Sara's eyes.

"Wha…what do you mean?" Sara asked quickly. "I mean I'll not let go of it if you don't want me to. I'll always be your friend, you know that."

"No," Catherine shook her head and wiped her face. "Why do I have to let go of your hand to find someone exactly like you?"

Sara's eyes grew wide a bit, understanding what Catherine was talking about. She tried to speak but no words came out.

"Why can't I just walk with you without looking for someone else?" Catherine asked again when Sara didn't speak. "You are the most considerate, caring, sweetest and loving person I have had the fortune to know. So can I just be with you?" She asked softly.

All Sara could do was stare at Catherine.

"I know that we just got into this friendship gig a few days ago," Catherine tried to explain herself. "But I have never had someone who understood me or made me feel better the way you do. You make me feel worthy and I don't get it that often."

Still all Sara did was stare, with her mouth hanging open.

"We both are in the same place, we need to move on yet we are stuck. Why can't we move on together with each other?" Catherine shrugged as she tried to make the situation understandable for both Sara and herself. "You can't say that we aren't attracted to each other, because we are. And you say we can be there for each other. Why can't be there for each other more than friends? Will that be so weird?"

"No," Sara shook her head not knowing to what she was saying 'no' to. Before she could say anything else she felt Catherine lean closer to her face.

"No," Sara slightly pushed Catherine backwards and jumped out of bed throwing the blonde off balance.

"Why not?" Catherine asked getting off the bed as well but she stayed away from the younger woman who looked extremely uncomfortable.

"Because….no," Sara shook her head again.

"Tell me why," Catherine pushed the brunette further to the edge. Sara was starting get annoyed and angry with the blonde's actions. She felt her ears grow hot and her heart beat fast.

"Because we aren't the best match right now," Sara shrugged.

"How are we not?" Catherine asked simply. "We both are attracted to each other, why else are we ending up situations where we cannot look away from each other?"

"That's different," Sara scrunched her face. "This is not a good idea Cath. You don't want to be with me."

"That is up for me to decide isn't it?" Catherine said raising her shoulders a bit. "And I'm saying I want to be with you, that I want to try to work it out with you. So why can't we be more than friends?"

"Because it's not right," Sara said a bit loudly. "Neither of us are ready."

"Well maybe if we try it out, we will learn to be ready," Catherine speculated. "We have become great friends in these few days, what makes you think it cannot become something else?"

"Just because we are good friends doesn't mean anything else will happen," Sara said in disbelief. "I am very close to Lucille and even Mia but that doesn't mean I would date them."

"Am I the same to you as Lucille and Mia?" Catherine asked cheekily making Sara even more angry.

"No, but seriously Cath, this is crazy," Sara said very loudly. "This is going too fast."

"How is it crazy?" Catherine asked sternly seeing that Sara was getting quite angry. "Why are you so scared?"

"I'm not scared, this is just crazy," Sara defended herself. "Anyone would agree to that."

"Fine I'll admit, it is fast but that doesn't mean it will end up bad," Catherine argued as firmly as Sara. "So why don't you tell me what is scaring you that much?"

"BECAUSE I AM MESSED UP," Sara practically shouted at the blonde who stepped back in shock. "Yeah, I'm messed up. You don't want to be with me."

"Why are you saying you are messed up?" Catherine asked softly.

"Look at me, how am I not?" Sara asked in a mocking tone. "God knows how messed up I was before I met Lily. And I fell in love with her despite the fact that she was dying, knowing that I couldn't be with her for more than even 3 years. And even I can't even imagine how messed up her death left me."

Catherine sat down on the bed listening to the brunette who wasn't looking at her. In fact it didn't even look as if she was talking to Catherine, it looked as if Sara was talking to herself more than anything else.

"Everyone says move on, that that would be what she wanted," Sara laughed sarcastically as tears started to roll down her cheeks. "You guys don't know what I feel every waking moment. You don't know that the first thing I see when I close my eyes to sleep is her. My dreams have been concurred by nightmares of her dying, over and over again and I can't do anything to stop it."

"You don't know how it feels to see the person you love the most die, even after you have seen it happen in real life," Sara said loudly looking straight at Catherine. "I die inside every time stand over her lifeless body in my sleep. I cannot get over it."

"It's just a drea…" Catherine tried to say but Sara interjected.

"It's not just a dream! I have gone through it, seen it, felt it. I have held her lifeless body in my arms! Sure, NOW it has become just a dream, but that doesn't mean that it feels any less real," Sara spat harshly. "I feel the pain, I feel the loss as real as I felt the day she took her last breath in my arms. You don't get it Cath, I'm fucked up. You don't want to get involved with me."

"That's…" Catherine tried to talk to again be interrupted by Sara.

"It's up for you to decide, I get it," Sara sighed clapping her hands on her face. "What you don't get is that I am still hung up over my dead girlfriend. I cannot get involved with you or anyone else. That's just going to end up me hurting you."

"You don't know that," Catherine said sternly.

"Yes, yes I do," Sara nodded as she talked. "You all are expecting me to move on with someone else when half of me is buried 6 feet under the ground. Even if I got involved with you, I will not be able to give you all of me."

"Who says I can do that either?" Catherine asked softly. "It takes time Sara."

"I KNOW. But come to me in 4 or more years and I will still not be able to replace Lily," Sara sobbed heavily. "And I am not assuming this, I know it. You don't get it Cath, no one gets what she was to me. No one gets what her death left me with. Even you don't."

"Every day I wake up to see that I am in bed alone," Sara spoke loudly as she sobbed. "It hits me every day and every minute that I can't see her, touch her, kiss her, talk to her and even joke around with her anymore. It kills me to live without her. I don't even know how to live without her. I have forgotten to smile, to be around people, to fucking live and be happy."

"Let me help you remember," Catherine said softly.

"I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DO IT," Sara said loudly and dropped to her knees and covered her face as she cried heavily into her hand.

Catherine's heart skipped several beats as she heard Sara cry out loud. She had never seen someone so broken down. It was as if the tears were coming from somewhere much deeper than just from her eyes. And her sobs were surely escaping straight from her heart. Catherine didn't know what to do. She just sat on the bed staring silently at the kneeling woman in front of her, wanting to do everything she could for her yet not knowing what she could do. So she let her instincts take over and knelt down in front of the brunette. She wrapped her arms around Sara and hugged her tightly while the brunette kept weeping on her chest.

"It's okay," Catherine said softly.

Sara put one arm around Catherine's waist and tried to stop crying but failed miserably. It just made her sob harder.

"I miss her so much," Sara whimpered softly. "I lost her and I can't get her back. There's nothing I could do to stop her, to keep her, to save her. I don't know what to do anymore." She cried.

"It'll be okay," Catherine mumbled even she herself couldn't understand how it would be so. It took Sara a few minutes to regain her breathing so that she could talk. How did Catherine know? Because Sara took several deep breaths that only ended up getting caught in her throat.

"I don't know…" Sara stopped at mid sentence.

"Look sweetie, I know it's killing you," Catherine cupped Sara's reddened face. "And this is probably me being selfish but I want to help you live, be happy and be there for you. And I want you to be there for me, more than as a friend."

Sara looked straight into Catherine eyes because she couldn't speak. Her body was not letting her.

"We are both hurting, and I know you are hurting way way more than me," Catherine kept going. "I can't even imagine what you are feeling. But I want to be the one you come to cry to, to hug when needed, to talk whenever you want to. And I don't want to be classified as your friends."

"Cath…" Sara said softly.

"I get you, you get me. Neither of us judge each other," Catherine asked explaining herself again. "Let's just give it a shot? This is not a rebound thing, well maybe a little. But seriously I really think we stand a chance."

"Cath…" Sara tried to talk again but Catherine cut her short again.

"I want to take care of you, I want you to take care of me," Catherine kept going. "I want to move on. I don't want to feel this way, I don't want you to feel that way either. I think we'll be quite together and…"

Before Catherine could say anything else two of Sara's fingers were in her mouth, making it impossible for her to talk.

"You talk too much," Sara smiled in between sniffs. And automatically Catherine started to suck on the brunette's fingers. "And you do that very well." Sara raised an impressed eyebrow.

"Yeah," Catherine smiled when Sara took her fingers back.

"Look Cath, this is going so fast and so damn crazy," Sara sighed. "And I really really can't promise you anything."

"You don't have to," Catherine said. "I can't either but that doesn't make me not want to work out something with you."

"Sure we probably would be good together," Sara sighed heavily. "And yeah I am sort of attracted to you after that night and maybe before. And also because you remind me so much of Lily. I don't know if that's a good thing."

"Well you are attracted to me, that's a start right?" Catherine asked quickly. "Urm…are you attracted to me because I look like her?" She asked uncomfortably.

"No, you look nothing like her," Sara frowned slightly. "You have those qualities I loved so much about her. It's familiar, it feels safe."

"Well there you go," Catherine said in a way as if she had an epiphany. Sara slightly leaned back at the blonde's actions. "You are attracted to my personality, not my looks. And in case you are not sure, that is a good thing."

"Huh," Sara said softly.

"It is," Catherine closed in on the brunette. "It's like I'm attracted to you because you are the one person who has been able to make me feel better even when I'm drowning in a sea full of sharks."

"Okkkkkay," Sara raised an eyebrow.

"So come on, let's just go with these little attractions first," Catherine said softly. "We are attracted to each other because we both feel safe with each other and so many more. Who says those attractions won't grow?"

"No one," Sara shrugged with her mind clouded by so many thoughts and wiping her face. "But I'm not over her yet. Not even close."

"I'm not over him either," Catherine stated.

"Then how do we expect us to do this while being hung up on them?" Sara asked not sure of what Catherine's plans were.

"I know you can never forget her completely and I probably won't forget Al. But we will help each other," Catherine said simply. "I want to move on and I know a part of you wants the same. And I want to move on with someone I already trust, someone I like and I know who won't hurt me and someone I can be with no matter what. And that is you honey. I know, we have gotten close just a few days ago but seriously, does it feel like just a few days?"

Sara put on her thinking face for a second before speaking. "Actually, no. Feels like it has been a long time."

"Then?" Catherine asked after a few moments of silence. "Do you want to feel like this for the rest of your life or do you want to find a way to live again?"

"I do, but I'm just scared," Sara sighed looking down on the floor.

"So am I," Catherine said softly. "But I think this might work."

"I do too, sort of," Sara answered taking a deep breath. "IF I can move on with someone, it probably is with you." Those words brought a smile on Catherine's face.

"Yeah?" Catherine asked cautiously.

"Yeah," Sara nodded trying to smile. "Let's give this a shot huh?"

"Yeah," Catherine nodded too.

"But if it doesn't work…" Sara started to talk but Catherine cut her off.

"Then we'll deal with it when the time comes," Catherine shrugged. "Who says we have to face that day anyway?"

"Urm, no one?" Sara took a wild guess.

"Exactly," Catherine took Sara's hand and squeezed it. That actually made Sara smile, this time genuinely. They sat in silence for a while looking at each other before Sara spoke again.

"By the way, thanks," Sara said softly.

"For what?" Catherine asked not sure of what Sara was talking about.

"I haven't talked to anyone about all that was in me," Sara shrugged. "You made me talk, even if it was just a bit of it."

"Well I think I just pissed you off enough to talk," Catherine scratched her head involuntarily.

"Either way, thank you," Sara ran a finger through Catherine's hair.

"Anytime," Catherine grinned before she was pulled into Sara's arm for a warm hug. Catherine smiled and tightened her grip around the younger woman. And outside their bedroom door, wiping off a tear, Mia smiled.

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**thanks for reading...let me know what you think, good or bad i'm all ears, or eyes...whichever...ciaos**


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

**Finally finished this chapter and when i read it, i felt that nothing much happens in it...so i guess this is just a chapter where the two girls gets a bit more closer to each other...hope you guys like it...and a big thank you for the review, really really appreciate it**

**for blushy...u wanted it so u got it :P**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1...REVIEW and ENJOY...  
**

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Sara squirmed in her position a little as she tried to make sure blood flowed in her leg while she held Catherine in her arms. She thought that Catherine had fallen asleep while sitting on the floor but then she felt the blonde's hands run over her lower back underneath her t-shirt assuring her that she was very much awake.

"Urm you want to get back on the bed?" Sara asked awkwardly. Catherine looked up to meet Sara's eyes and smiled with a nod.

Both women got to their feet and while Sara stretched her body and legs, Catherine had already jumped into bed and made herself comfortable. Before Sara could join the blonde, there was a loud knock on the door which made the brunette jump back away from the bed.

"HEY BREAKFAST'S READY," Mia's overly cheerful voice came from the other side of the door. "WAKE UP LAZY ARSES."

"What time is it?" Sara asked Catherine who grabbed her phone and showed Sara that it was 9 am which made her head in disbelief that that much time has passed. "We'll be out in a minute." She called to the door before looking at Catherine again. "I'll take a shower and you can jump in afterwards?"

"Or…" Catherine sat up and raised an eyebrow at Sara.

"Or?" Sara asked after a few seconds of thought.

"Oh just come with me," Catherine grabbed Sara's hand and pulled her towards the bathroom. But the brunette stopped them in mid.

"No no, I'm sorry Cath," Sara squeezed Catherine's hand. "But I can't have sex with you just yet." She said awkwardly. But instead of letting for of Sara's hand, Catherine laughed.

"Who said we're going to have sex?" She asked in between laughs.

"Then what are we going into the bathroom together for?" Sara asked curiously.

"To take a shower," Catherine said simply with a smile.

"No sex?" Sara asked scratching her head in thought.

"Honey, have you never showered with someone without having sex with them?" Catherine asked stepping into the brunette's private space.

"Urm no?" Sara said with a mischievous smile.

"That is good to know," Catherine smiled as mischievously as Sara. "But I don't think we should jump into sex just yet. So why don't we just take the time to get to know each other?"

"And we do that by taking a shower?" Sara asked with a smile.

"It's a good start right?" Catherine winked and pulled Sara into the bathroom.

Sure enough at the end of the shower, Sara did believe that it was a good start. She stepped out of the bathroom with Catherine following her close by. She was feeling really cold, probably because they had spent almost 30 minutes in the shower. As Catherine said, they didn't have sex but it was quite distracting to have a naked woman around her in the shower. Though it was quite fascinating for Sara to actually realize that she can actually share a shower with a beautiful woman without having an agenda.

"You're turning blue," Catherine stepped in front of Sara.

"Yeah," Sara nodded and pulled Catherine into her arms. "And it's your fault so you're going to help me get warm."

"No problem" Catherine tightened her grip on the brunette and kissed her chest.

They didn't realize that they were standing in front of the bathroom with just towels covering their body and their hair dripping wet. And they didn't even think of backing away from each other when the bedroom door opened. They just turned their heads a bit with matching frowns to face a very cheeky looking Mia.

"Well hello," Mia tilted her head and leaned on the door frame with her coy grin.

"What?" Sara asked irritably.

"I thought you said there's nothing going on between you two," Mia said with the same cheeky grin.

"Well things change," Catherine shrugged as she tried not to smile.

"Sure, sure whatever you say. Anyway, breakfast's getting cold," Mia said in a more serious note. "I thought you both went back to sleep but I guess I was wrong."

"Yeah you were," Catherine nodded onto Sara's chest tugging slightly on Sara's towel.

"Hey you're going to make this fall," Sara repositioned her towel with a pout.

"So?" Catherine bit her lip flirtatiously.

"Awe that's just adorable," Mia said sarcastically and clapped her hands together. "But seriously, breakfast. I'm starving."

"We'll be out in a minute," Catherine grinned and turned to her bag, digging into find something to wear. Mia took a look at Catherine and back Sara who was staring at the blonde with a look she had missed seeing on Sara. With a smile, she closed the door and headed to the kitchen.

"Are you just going to stand there?" Catherine dropped her towel and started to get dressed. She paused to chuckle when she saw that Sara's eyes immediately dropped to her breasts. "I'm up here honey."

Sara quickly looked up and gave her an innocent look. "What? You seriously cannot blame me for that."

"I'm not blaming you, but you should get dressed before Mia comes and make you have breakfast in your towel," Catherine patted on Sara's cheek before going back to getting dressed.

The two women headed to the kitchen where Mia was staring at a plate of pancakes with pure love. Catherine chuckled and poured coffee for Sara and herself while Sara sat down and stared at Mia with a cheeky grin.

"What?" Mia asked irritably without taking her eyes off the pancakes.

"You look ridiculous," Sara said.

"I'm hungry," Mia said still staring at the pancakes.

"Then eat," Catherine hit Mia on the head making the woman frown. She sat down next to Mia and handed Sara the coffee. "What are we doing today?" She asked grabbing a pancake right after Mia grabbed two at once.

"Urm…wanna hang out with Lucille?" Sara asked taking a bite off her food.

"Sounds good," Catherine nodded. "Tomorrow's going to be hell anyway." She rolled her eyes.

"Why?" Mia said in a muffled voice.

"Oh we came here coz the guys dragged us to watch some football game," Sara started to explain.

"Oh the 9ers and Rams?" Mi asked excitedly.

"Damn I forgot that you liked football," Sara rolled her eyes.

For the rest of the breakfast and practically rest of the morning Sara and Catherine had to endure Mia talking about football and how amazing it was. After a very long breakfast, they were now sitting in the living room watching some football game on television. Catherine had slowly dozed off while Sara was trying extremely hard to concentrate on the game.

"I'm bored," Sara whined and tightened her grip around the sleeping blonde.

"Fine, what do you want to watch?" Mia turned off the television and glared at Sara.

"Let's go to Lucy's?" Sara yawned.

"Alright, let me change and we'll head out," Mia headed to her room leaving Sara alone with Catherine. Knowing that they had to leave soon she decided to wake up Catherine.

"Cath?" She softly patted on Catherine's cheek making her squint her eyes open. "We have to leave soon."

"Okay," Catherine smiled and snuggled more into Sara and closed her eyes again.

"No no, wake up," Sara shook Catherine making the blonde frown.

"Fine fine, I'm up," Catherine opened her eyes and leaned close to Sara. "Happy?" She asked before pushing her lips on Sara's.

"Mmmm," Sara nodded as an answer before kissing Catherine back. The next second Sara felt herself being pushed on top of Catherine who laid down on the couch making herself comfortable. While Sara's hands played with Catherine's hair, the blonde was sending goosebumps over her skin by playing with the exposed skin on her back.

"Okay, whenever you guys decide to resurface, we can head off," Mia's voice came from the hallway as a very annoying distraction.

Catherine and Sara both turned their heads to glare at the younger woman who was putting on her jacket, giving them a cheeky grin.

"Oh quick question, can I spread the word around that you're hitting that?" Mia asked Sara who frowned.

"As long as you don't make it sound demeaning, you can," Sara said softly before getting up from the couch and pulling the blonde up.

"Ah man you take all the fun out of everything," Mia pouted before heading to the door.

"That's true, you do," Catherine grinned before grabbing her bag and followed Mia out. Sara scowled and locked the door behind her. Since Mia was adamant about being lazy, they rode to Lucille's house which wasn't actually far.

After a few minutes of driving, they pulled over in front of Lucille's house. While Catherine followed Sara into the house, Mia was distracted by a beautiful girl who was passing by the house. Sara knocked loudly on the door and waited for her friend to open the door.

"Do all your friends hate doorbells?" Catherine asked with a smile.

"Pretty much," Sara grinned. "Even I hate it."

"Why?" Catherine asked.

"I hate the noise it makes," Sara scowled. "Gives me a bad headache."

"Awe," Catherine took Sara's hand. But before she could say anything else, Lucille opened the door.

"Hey, what are you guys doing here?" She asked with a soft smile. It looked as if she had just woken up.

"Visiting?" Sara said dumbly.

"Got to love your use of words honey," Lucille chuckled. "Come on in."

Her house was homey even though it resembled Sara's apartment in a lot of ways. The living room looked pretty clean, so clean that Catherine wouldn't have thought that a 7 year old boy lived there. The first thing that caught Catherine's eyes was the big comfy looking couch facing the television rack, probably because she was still feeling very sleepy.

"Where's Mia?" Lucille asked closing the door behind her.

"Saw some girl outside," Sara pointed before practically jumping into the couch.

"Ah, no wonder," Lucille grinned. "Make yourselves comfortable while I go change. You guys visit too early in the morning."

"It's almost noon Lucy," Sara rolled her eyes as she cuddled the cushion on the couch.

"Hey I was up by 6 to get Kyle ready for school," Lucille pointed a dangerous finger at the brunette who laughed. "So you can shut up."

"Fine fine," Sara said still laughing at her friend who hurried upstairs to her room. She turned to Catherine who was busy staring at the pictures that hung on the walls. There was a beautiful picture of Lucille, Kyle and of a man who looked an awful lot like Grissom. He had the same blue eyes and his hair was slowly turning to the salt-pepper hair that Grissom sported now. In fact, the man looked strangely familiar, as if she had seen him before. She stared closely at the picture and the smile finally snapped something in her. And then she remembered where she had seen that face before.

"That's George," Catherine jumped when Sara said since the brunette was standing inches behind her.

"He's…." Catherine started but she was interrupted by a loud, happy 'hey' that came from the stairs. The greeting made Sara almost jog to where the voice came from. At the bottom of the staircase stood George grinning from ear to ear, with his arms wide open and in a pair of pajama pants. Sara jumped into the man's arms who lifted her from the ground as he hugged her back and swayed on the spot. Catherine leaned on the wall and stared at the two people in front of her. How she had not seen Sara this alive before, she would never know.

"Cath, this is Lucille's husband," Sara pulled the man to the blonde who quickly straightened up. "And George, this is Catherine Willows."

"Oh, I've heard a lot about you," George said making Catherine puzzled. "George Grissom, nice to meet you."

"Grissom's half brother right?" Catherine asked with no sense of surprise in her voice making Sara frown but George smile.

"It's nice to see that my brother acknowledges me outside the family," George said in a joking tone. Catherine smiled while Sara continued to frown with a puzzled look on her face.

"Yeah he told me about you when I once asked him to say something revealing back to me," Catherine explained and turned to Sara who maintained her frown. "It was some time ago, when we first dealt with Lady Heather? Remember?"

"I didn't work on that case," Sara finally relaxed her face. "But I remember Nick talking about her for two days straight."

"Well, that's when Gil told me about you and I saw your picture at his house once too," She turned back to George. "But you sound so normal. It's hard to believe that the bugs-obsessed entomologist who has no social life whatsoever, actually has a normal brother." Catherine grinned.

"Ah well we have seen weirder things in this world haven't we?" George winked at the blonde. "But he does have a social life, trust me. I have seen it."

"Really now?" Catherine asked seriously to which George nodded. "That's interesting."

"Man, I thought you didn't know," Sara crossed her arms and sighed. "I was hoping that you would be shocked for at least an hour."

"Awe well maybe you can surprise me some other way then," Catherine put on her flirty tone which made Sara smile. However George looked at them suspiciously.

"Something going on between you two?" He asked bluntly making the two women look down at the floor. "Oh yes, there is DEFINITELY something going on between you two." He pointed from Sara to Catherine. "Does Gil know?"

"NO," Catherine and Sara said loudly making the man step back.

"Okay, I'm guessing he's not supposed to know yet," He grinned. "Then I'll leave you girls alone while I go join my beautiful wife in the shower."

"Didn't need to know the last part," Sara scowled.

"Oh really?" George stepped closer to Sara bringing a horrific look on Sara's face. "You didn't need to know that I'd touch every inch of her wet, slithery body and kiss her, pick her up and suck those delicious…"

"NANANANANANAAA NANANA CAN'T HEAR YOU. NO NO NO," Sara put her fingers in her ear and said loudly. "GO AWAY." Catherine laughed heartily at the brunette's reaction along with George.

"I'll see you in a bit Cath," George waved at Catherine at patted on Sara's biceps before jogging up the stairs.

"I hate it when he does that," Sara frowned and buried her hands in her pockets.

"Awe, come here," Catherine stepped inches from the brunette, threw her arms around Sara's neck and kissed her. Smiling, Sara reciprocated and put her hands on Catherine's waist pushing their bodies together.

"Alright where's my girl?" Mia's voice came from the front door. Sara and Catherine broke apart from their kiss but Catherine made Sara stay in her arms. "Oh you two snogging again?" She asked cheekily.

"Yeah, you got a problem with that?" Sara raised an eyebrow at her friend.

"On the contrary, I think it's very hot when two girls make out," Mia shrugged. "Where are those two anyway? Shagging?"

"Oh my god I have forgotten about your god damn annoying vocabulary," Sara rolled her eyes and put her forehead on Catherine's shoulders. With a chuckle, Catherine patted on her head and leaned back on the wall for support.

"They probably are actually," Catherine nodded at Mia who winked.

"Alright, I need some snack," Mia clapped her hands together and headed to the kitchen.

"You JUST had breakfast," Sara's annoying voice came muffled since her mouth was pushed against Catherine's shoulders.

"What can you say love, I have a big appetite," Mia winked at Catherine again before she disappeared into the kitchen.

"You want to lay down? Or are you comfortable with standing like that?" Catherine rubbed Sara's back softly.

"Couch is pretty comfy," Sara lifted her head. "And you're coming with me."

"Oh I know I am," Catherine grinned.

Sara jumped into the couch again and made herself comfortable before making some room for Catherine. The blonde laid on the couch next to her and closed her eyes as the couch really was extremely comfortable.

"Don't fall asleep again," Sara patted on Catherine's cheek.

"Keep me awake then," Catherine rolled onto her side and face Sara who raised an eyebrow.

"I think I can do that," Sara smiled before pulling Catherine closer to her. "But we will get caught again."

"So? Do you mind it?" Catherine ran a finger down the side of Sara's neck making the brunette close her eyes halfway.

"Not really," Sara opened her eyes with great difficulty. "You are my girlfriend now right?"

"Yeah, I thought we were clear on that," Catherine lifted her head slightly.

"Good," Sara said shortly before pressing her lips against Catherine's slightly open ones.

Sara felt Catherine smile onto her lips as she let her fingers rake through Sara's hair. Sure Sara had kissed Catherine before but not like this; this time she was more into it than Catherine was. And she knew that when she was into a kiss, her hands would roam. And sure enough, her hands went from the blonde's hair down her neck to her waist, snaking under Catherine's shirt. She felt Catherine take in a sharp breath before the blonde pushed harder on her lips. Sara's hands slithered to Catherine's back and pushed their bodies even closer and she could feel the goosebumps appearing on Catherine's skin with her every touch. Sara opened her mouth more to let Catherine's eager tongue tease hers while her hand ran up the blonde's back and to the front, stopping her hand right below her breasts.

Just then Sara thought she heard someone walking down the stairs making her snap her head towards the noise. But no one was there.

"What happened?" Catherine asked slightly out of breath.

"I thought I heard someone," Sara looked at the flushed woman in front of her.

"No one's there. Come here," Catherine put her hand on Sara's cheek and pressed their lips together again.

And Sara forgot the world again. Her hands rubbed Catherine's smooth, warm skin while kissing the blonde deeply. She pulled away from Catherine's lips and kissed her cheek before moving down to her neck right below her ear sucking on the blonde's flesh softly. Her hands moved up and squeezed Catherine's breast softly.

"Ahh…" A non-subtle moan escaped Catherine's lips since Sara kept teasing her nipples over her bra.

A smile crept on Sara's lips as she kept sucking Catherine's neck. She felt the blonde's grip on her hair tighten and her legs wrap around her waist.

"Ahem," A loud distraction came from behind the couch making both women freeze. Sara kept her lips pressed against Catherine's neck while all Catherine could do was close her eyes shut and cover her face with one free hand.

"Shit," Sara whispered onto Catherine's neck just loud enough for the blonde to hear.

"Urm…" Catherine stuttered but then decided to shut up and not say anything.

"Well why don't you two teenagers stop blushing and sit up," George's cheeky voice came first.

Sara finally lifted her head and looked at Catherine who showed her eyes between her fingers. Sara took a breath and finally sat up and smiled at her friends who were all standing with matching cheeky grins.

"Hello," Sara said softly.

"Uh huh," Lucille nodded, crossing her arms. "Not getting up is it Cath?" She asked the blonde who quickly got off the couch and stood up, rubbing the spot on her neck that Sara had reddened.

"Hi," She smiled with a very visible blush on both her cheeks.

"Not that we mind you two getting it on but mind not doing it on the couch?" George said jokingly. "We just bought it and we were hoping to be the first ones to christen it."

"Do we really need all that information?" Mia asked throwing a cheeto into her mouth.

"That wasn't all the information, all the information would be…" George started but to Sara's glee, Lucille stopped him.

"Maybe some other time sweetheart," Lucille patted on her husband's stomach and stepped forward. "Oe lazy ass, get off the couch."

"Why? I'm just sitting here," Sara asked.

"Yeah but I want to sit, my back's hurting," Lucille brushed away Sara's leg and dropped on the couch.

"I think you were a bit too hard on her," Mia nudged George.

"Oh shut up," Lucille glared at just when Mia's cell phone rang. She excused herself and disappeared into the kitchen while Lucille turned to Sara who was relaxing on the couch with complete ease. "And how might you be doing today?"

"I'm fine?" Sara said uncomfortably.

"How can you not be fine after making out with a chic like that huh?" Lucille pointed at Catherine who was still standing in front of the couch with her hand on her neck.

"You do know that I can hear you right?" Catherine mumbled before sitting down on the coffee table near her.

"It's a compliment sweetie," Lucille smiled innocently.

"Baby I'm starving," George whined and put his arms around his wife from behind.

"I have an idea, Sar's here so why don't you and her make lunch today?" Lucille cupped George's face.

"Oh no no, I'm not cooking," Sara crossed her arms and legs frowning.

"Why not?" Catherine butted in making the brunette sigh. "I'd love to try out something you make."

"Come on Sar, you can't say no to that," Lucille nudged her friend cheekily.

"Fine," Sara rolled her eyes and jumped over the couch, dragging George to the kitchen. "Come on big guy, you're helping me."

"I love it that I have you to make her do stuff like that again," Lucille patted on Catherine's thigh. The blonde grinned and straightened her hair a little.

"Hey make it just for the four of you," Mia called heading to the front door. "They need me back at work so I'll catch you couples later."

"Later love," Lucille called before Mia closed the door behind her.

While Catherine and Lucille talked about kids and their partners, Sara and George were getting busy in the kitchen. They weren't sure what they were going to make so they decided to just go with the flow.

"You do know what you are doing right?" George asked as he washed the vegetables.

"Just do as I say," Sara said with her head deep inside the fridge. "Trust me, I'll not give you guys food poisoning."

"Better not," George laughed. "But we better make something with some kind of meat or else Kyle is going to starve. The boy can't handle too much veggies in his diet."

"God I can't believe my son eats meat," Sara rolled her eyes and went back to what she was doing. While they cooked, Sara and George talked about Kyle and of course Grissom. The most fascinating fact Sara found in the conversation was when George slipped that Grissom had a 'lady friend'.

"Come on tell me," Sara pleaded for the umpteenth time.

"He'll kill me if I tell you," George tasted the sauce and licking his lips. "Damn that tastes good."

"Thank you," Sara said proudly. "But come on, who is it? Please? I swear I won't tell anyone, except Cath I mean."

"Hey are you seriously going out with her?" George asked seriously.

"Yeah," Sara answered shortly.

"You're ready for something like that?" He asked leaning back on the counter.

"No, and neither is she really," Sara sighed heavily. "Maybe that's why even I think that this might be a good idea."

"If you say so," George nodded. "As long as you're not going to end up hurt I'm good."

"Thanks," Sara smiled and turned back to finishing making her salad. "I'm done here. We should make them make the table."

"Agreed," George grinned and turned off the gas before both of them headed out to the living room. Catherine and Lucille were still talking merrily. Sara grinned at the excited look on Catherine's face and knew that she was having a lot of fun talking to Lucille. It was good that her girlfriend got along with her friends that well. If not, that might be a problem even she would find hard to fix.

"Ladies, lunch is ready," George called enthusiastically. "And since we made it, we think you should make the table."

"Forget that for a minute," Lucille waved a hand in the air. "Can you believe Cath used to be a stripper before a CSI?"

"Really now," George hurried to the couch while Sara got back into the kitchen to get a bottle of water. "Why on earth did you become a CSI then? Stripper sounds like more fun than anything else."

"It was," Catherine threw her hair in the air. "But that was just killing me softly so I decided that it was time for a career change."

"Oh man, I bet you were damn good at what you used to do," George took a good look at Catherine from head to toe.

"Well maybe she can show us?" Lucille turned to Catherine who laughed.

"Oh I don't think that would be a good idea," Catherine waved a hand in the air. "I haven't done that in a long time."

"Well why don't you do it and see for yourself if you still got it?" George pushed the topic.

"Are you guys serious?" Catherine asked with a chuckle. Sure she loved to dance but to dance like that again, that also in front of her girlfriend's friends didn't seem like something she had even thought of doing. And just then, she realized how weird yet exciting it was to call Sara her girlfriend.

"Yeah why not," Lucille leaned back on the couch when George sat next to her. She leaned on her husband and gave Catherine a hopeful look.

"Come on girl, entertain us just this once," George said playing with Lucille's spiked hair. "You can use Sara as your 'pole' if you want to."

"Use me as what now?" Sara's shocked voice came from the kitchen doorway grabbing everyone's attention. She looked confused even as she drank from the water bottle. Catherine was liking the fact that Sara's face was flushed and sweat was breaking from her forehead. She did look very appealing.

"Catherine's going to give us a demonstration," Lucille smiled innocently.

"Of?" Sara stepped closer to the couch.

"How she used to dance," George said simply. Sara choked on her water making Lucille snigger. It took a few seconds for Sara to stop coughing and take in a relaxing deep breath.

"How the hell does that involve me?" Sara asked in a slightly terrified manner. Of course she wanted to see Catherine dance but to be used in the dance meant Catherine would be focusing all her attention on her. And that meant that she would be a lot more aroused than she was at the moment and that in the end would create trouble in the arrangement she had with Catherine.

"She needs someone to dance for right?" George winked at Catherine who kept rubbing her neck and avoided Sara's eye contact.

"Right," Sara gulped loudly and turned to Catherine. "And you're seriously doing this Cath?"

"Urm I don't know," Catherine finally looked at Sara and smiled. "If you want to, sure I'll do it. I don't mind."

Sara stood and looked at Catherine for a while. The blonde kept looking straight into her eyes making it unable for her to think. She had always wanted to see Catherine dance ever since she had learnt the fact that Catherine used to be a strip dancer. But she didn't expect to find it out in front of her best friend and her husband. But she guessed that it was a better time than any other time.

"Just let her do it Sara," Lucille said in a pleading tone. "It's not like we get to have fun like this after we all 'grew up' right? Let's just be our stupid teen selves again. Just for today."

"Please?" George pleaded like a little boy.

Sara looked at Catherine who smiled sympathetically and tilted her head.

"Fine," Sara sighed and wiped her face tiredly.

"Awesome," George clapped his hands together and turned to Catherine along with Lucille. The blonde stood up and started to shift on her spot. She looked at Sara who kept staring at her.

"You should sit down," Catherine pointed at the spot she was sitting a few seconds ago. Without saying anything, Sara sat down and sighed heavily. Catherine leaned closer to Sara's face. "Don't worry, I'll keep it short." She said before placing a kiss on Sara's cheek.

"Thanks," Sara smiled appreciatively and turned to Lucille and George who were staring at her. "Look at her, not me."

"Can you put on some music?" Catherine scratched her head at George who took his iPod from the nearby rack and started to browse through it. After a few seconds, he screamed 'aha' and put the iPod on the dock.

"Ready?" He said in a mischievous tone which made Catherine a bit nervous. Still she nodded and took in a deep breath and closed her eyes. She knew that she still had it in her, but she also knew that she was very much out of touch.

George pushed 'play' and the song Black Velvet by Alannah Myles started to play. Catherine chuckled and raised an eyebrow at George who just raised his shoulders in his defense.

Catherine turned to Sara who slightly leaned back because of the look Catherine was giving her. Catherine raised her eyebrows mischievously at Sara and started to sway her body to the music. Sara held her breath and leaned back, putting all her weight on her hands.

_Mississippi in the middle of a dry spell _

The blonde kept licking her lips, closing her eyes sensually as she ran her hand over the hem of her t-shirt slightly before letting it go, teasing Sara involuntarily. She got closer to Sara, putting a hand on the brunette's shoulder and gliding her body almost inches from Sara's body.

_Jimmy Rogers on the Victrola up high _

Sara's mouth was hanging open at the moment and she tried very hard to keep her hands intact. Catherine moved gracefully while her hand ran down Sara's shoulder to her chest. She pushed the brunette further back before running her finger over Sara's chest and up her slender neck.

_Mama's dancin' with baby on her shoulder _

Catherine took her hand back and ran it over her own body and into her hair, moving her waists in a way which made Sara really hold her breath. The blonde kept one hand in her hair and kept moving at the same time moving closer against Sara.

_The sun is settin' like molasses in the sky_

The dancing queen in front of her turned her back to Sara but she turned her head so that the brunette could see her face. Sara frowned slightly but when the blonde bent down and ran her hands up her own legs, all the complains in Sara's mind disappeared along with any other rational thought in her mind.

_The boy could sing, knew how to move, everything _

Sara licked her lips when Catherine turned around, her eyes half closed and the hands running lazily against her alongside the movements of her body. Sara was finding it very hard to concentrate and when Catherine put a leg in between her legs and pressed her knee against the brunette's chest, she felt her heart start to beat so fast that she was scared it might stop.

_Always wanting more, he'd leave you longing for_

Catherine moved her face inches from Sara's and blew on her lips making Sara gulp. Catherine's hand ran up Sara's arm and to her shoulder while her fingers teased the exposed flesh on her neck. Just like that Catherine turned around again making Sara let out a soft groan.

_Black velvet and that little boy's smile _

Catherine smiled as she heard Sara's disappointment. She pressed the back of her knees against Sara's knees and bended slightly, swaying her hips along with the increasing tone of the music. Sara couldn't move her eyes away from the beautiful woman in front of her swaying so seductively to the music. It was as if Catherine's body was made just for that. Slowly Sara saw the blonde, with her back still turned to her, squat down and up, gliding her body as she went.

_Black velvet with that slow southern style _

Sara wasn't even paying attention to the other people in the room as Catherine swayed around on the spot. She finally turned to face Sara, bending forward and putting a finger in her mouth at the same time. She licked her finger so seductively that Sara's fingers formed a fist on the table trying to keep them in place. Catherine took the finger and put it on Sara's lips, extremely slowly running them down her chin, her neck and down her chest back into Catherine's mouth.

_A new religion that'll bring ya to your knees _

Catherine's hands moved around her own body before she reached the hem of her shirt lifting it up slightly to reveal her well toned torso before her hands slithered up her sides and into her hair again. Her hips kept making the same movement which made Sara slowly go crazy. And to Sara's surprise, Catherine put an arm around her and pressed her body against hers. Catherine's stomach was grinding against her mouth and this time, Sara couldn't take it.

_Black velvet if you please_

Sara put one hand Catherine's exposed waist and ran her tongue across Catherine's stomach making the blonde throw her head back with a soft moan. Sara stopped at Catherine's side and sucked on her flesh before running her tongue up lifting Catherine's shirt even more. The two women had temporarily forgotten that there were two other people in the room. Catherine kept one arm wrapped around Sara's neck while her other hand disappeared into the brunette's hair. Her knee was well placed on the table in between Sara's legs and she slowly pushed her knee making Sara softly bite her on her sides.

"Catherine?" A familiar voice came from the front door. "What on earth are you two doing?"

Sara and Catherine snapped their head towards the voice. And there stood, to very much their surprise a very shocked Gilbert Grissom.

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**ok so there were a few surprises, lets hope i can make all this go smoothly...drop in a review and tell me what you guys though...one word would do ;)**

**and the song as mentioned is Black Velvet by Alannah Myles...nice song :)  
**

**thanks for reading...**


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

**Well next chapter, sorry for any spelling, grammar or factual errors, im a bit sloppy coz of some meds...hope you all like it...and thanks for the reviews, was a big help...  
**

**for you babe...**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1...ENJOY and REVIEW pls**

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The room was filled with silence apart from the heavy breathing coming from almost all occupants. Catherine quickly jumped away from Sara while the brunette stood up and gulped down loud enough for the whole room to hear. She turned to Lucille and George who were giving a worried look at Grissom. While all that, all Grissom did was stand at his spot staring at Catherine who was staring back at him cautiously.

"Gil, I thought you were coming by tonight," George stood up and said in a shaky voice. He knew his brother and the times he had seen that look on Grissom's face, it hadn't gone that good.

"Not important," Grissom waved a hand at his brother who stopped at his tracks. "You two, what are you doing?"

"It was nothing Gil," Lucille stood up giving a scared look at her brother-in-law. He didn't look shocked anymore, he looked angry.

"Looked like something to me," He turned to Lucille, softening his tone slightly. He wasn't able to think very rationally at the moment but even in the most depressing times in his lives, he could never talk to Lucille in a hurtful manner.

"I was just showing them what I used to do for a living Gil, that's all," Catherine said in the most firm voice she could come up with for the moment.

"That involves Sara doing what she was doing?" He turned to the brunette whose eye widened.

"Not really," Sara crossed her arms and looked down on the floor.

Grissom stared at Sara with anger in his eyes. Catherine couldn't understand why he was so angry. Sure he was their boss but what they did during their personal time was none of his business and that he said it himself. Catherine's confident rose as she slowly realized that she had nothing to hide, be embarrassed about or explain about.

"It does when she's my girlfriend," Catherine said in a more firm voice than before. Grissom's head snapped towards the blonde who stepped forward with her hands on her hips. "And it has nothing to do with you whatsoever. So stop freaking out and just calm down."

"I am not freaking out," Grissom stepped forward to Catherine who stood her ground. "And you're dating her? Why would you be dating her? That's insane"

"What do you mean by that? I'm dating her because she is a caring, loving and supportive woman whom I'm attracted to," Catherine retorted. "That doesn't seem insane to me. On the contrary, it seems like one of the sanest thing I have done during this last few days."

"Sane? You cannot be involved with your subordinate Catherine," Grissom pointed out formally.

"If it doesn't come between our professional life, I don't see a reason why I can't," Catherine spat now her anger rising. To her Grissom was being unreasonable even though in the back of her mind she did note that the man had a point. But she was a bit too stubborn to admit that. "And I don't mix those two and you know it." She pointed a finger at Grissom making George cautious. He knew how much his brother hated when people did that.

"You don't mix your professional and personal life? And Adam Novak was a hoax was he?" Grissom spat in his defense.

Sara looked at Catherine in a worried manner knowing that Grissom had hit a nerve. Catherine's fingers formed a fist and her face was reddening, and it was not from her dancing or anything. It was pure anger. She had seen it directed at her several times and she knew it was never a good sign.

"That was one time Grissom, one fucking time," Catherine swore a bit loudly. "All the years I have worked with you and you cannot forget that one stupid mistake? Do you have to rub it in all the time?"

"I'm not rubbing it in Catherine," Grissom took in a deep breath trying to calm down seeing that Catherine had lost her temper. "I'm just saying that it is not a healthy idea to date your subordinate."

"You don't know that Gris," Sara spoke before Catherine could. "We aren't kids."

"It is against the lab's policy," Grissom played his last card. "You cannot pursue this."

"Oh yeah because we always follow the lab's policies," Catherine rolled her eyes, crossing her arms. "What's the real problem Grissom?"

"I don't want this to break up our team," Grissom said frankly. "I don't want what happens between you two to affect both of you from working together."

"Are you saying Catherine and I cannot work out being in a relationship?" Sara interrupted with a frown. "Oh ye of little faith." She shook her head.

"Why the hell do you think we will end up breaking up when we JUST started going out?" Catherine asked spitefully.

"It's an assumption," Grissom stood his ground. "Nothing in this world lasts forever. Show me a couple that has walked past everything and is still happy and we will end this conversation right here."

"Look to your left," Sara snapped.

Grissom sighed and turned to face his brother and his wife, standing by the side listening quietly to the argument. He smiled at George who had a blank expression. Sure they had gone through hell and back with each other and he was definitely sure that they were happy with each other and will always be.

"I'm not saying that we are never going to break up. I don't know the future and neither do you," Sara said seriously. "So maybe you can just have a little faith in us. I know it must be very hard for you to have faith in something you are not sure of. But it's like religion. You can't touch it or feel it, you just believe it." She narrowed her eyes at Grissom.

Grissom raised an eyebrow at Sara who didn't even crack a smile but the blonde standing next to her did. He was slightly shocked by the look Catherine was giving Sara.

"It doesn't mean that if you can't accept this I'm going to break up with her, no. If I'm to let go of her it is going to be because of something more solid than because some man was unable to understand the fact that two people need each other and wants to be with each other, despite the fact that some lab's policy is against them," Sara continued staring at Grissom who stared back. "I don't think I will break up with her anyway. So either you can accept it or look the other way. It's your choice. I could care less about what you think."

"Plus even if anything does happen, we both are pretty good in hiding what we feel," Catherine pointed out.

None of them knew how long they stood in the room in complete silence. Finally Grissom wiped his face and sighed.

"Fine, I'll look the other way for now," Grissom said making Sara finally relax her face. "Just don't get caught by Ecklie or one of his bloodhounds."

"We can do that," Catherine nodded. "Thanks Gil." She stepped forward and hugged her friend who again sighed before embracing her back.

"What are you doing here anyway?" Sara asked not moving from her spot.

"I'm visiting my brother, got a problem with it?" Grissom let go of Catherine and stepped towards Sara who shrugged. "And I don't get a hug from you anymore? I thought you were the one who said outside the lab we were friends."

"It's your own damn fault so don't blame me," Sara finally smiled and hugged the man.

"Okay, now that all the tensions gone how about we have some lunch?" George clapped his hands together. "I believe a certain two were supposed to be making the table right Sar?" He winked at the brunette who grinned at Catherine.

"And I believe a certain someone should stop trying to be cheeky if he wants his wife to have sex with him tonight," Lucille punched her husband's bicep before heading to the kitchen with a laughing Catherine following her.

"What are you doing here in San Francisco?" Grissom said to Sara before sitting down in the chair nearby.

"The guys dragged us here to see some football game," Sara explained making Grissom's eyes widen.

"Guys…that means….you mean the rest of the team is here too?" He asked in a horrified tone.

"By the rest if you mean Nick, Greg and Warrick yes," Sara nodded and narrowed her eyes at Grissom. "Why are you so scared? They'll be delighted to see you."

"Damn you're busted Gil," George chuckled at his brother who stared him down.

"Busted? Of what?" Sara asked getting more curious with every passing word.

Just then the front door opened and a cautious face peeped into the living room. And a mischievous grin appeared on Sara's lips scaring Grissom. But the green eyes at the door twinkled at the sight of Sara.

"Well hello Lady Heather," Sara crossed her arms and pursed her lips trying not to make her mischievousness anymore obvious.

"Hello Sara," Heather closed the front door and entered the living room. "It took me a bit longer to find a place to park." She said to Grissom who nodded softly. "You must be George." She then turned to George who stood up and held a hand for his brother's 'lady friend' to take.

"And you must be Heather, nice to finally meet you," George said kindly. "I've heard a lot about you."

"Good things I hope," Heather said in her usual low voice shaking George's hand.

"You bet," He smiled and turned to Sara who was still sporting a stupid grin. "What the hell is wrong with you?" He asked the brunette.

"Oh nothing," She turned to Grissom who avoided eye contact and rested his chin on his hand. "It's been a while Lady Heather." She too held her hand which Heather took with her usual enchanting smile.

"Please, call me Heather," She said with a shrug. "I don't like being addressed as 'Lady Heather' during social visits."

"Noted," Sara nodded. Just then Lucille and Catherine appeared from the kitchen with the necessities for Lunch. Both women turned to the living room and seeing Heather standing there, left the plates on the dining table and headed to the living room.

"Hi, Heather I presume?" Lucille asked with a smile.

"Yes, you must be Lucille," She shook her hand with Lucille and turned to Catherine who was sporting a very puzzled look. "Nice to see you again Catherine." She held her hand to Catherine who took a few seconds before reciprocating.

"Yeah, been a while huh?" She said in a confused tone. "What brings you here?"

"I made Grissom bring me here to meet George," She said in a slightly sly tone.

"Oh," She looked at Grissom who was now covering his face with his one hand and the cheeky grin on Sara's face. "OH!" She said a bit loudly getting the point of it all. "Wow Gil, you could have told us that you were dating Lady Heather." She added cheekily.

"Call me Heather," Heather said quickly before turning to Grissom. "You never told them that you were seeing me?" She asked softly.

"I didn't find it important to share it with them," Grissom said without thinking. When Heather raised an eyebrow at him, he realized that what he had just said didn't sound anyway close to what he actually wanted to say. "I mean…" He started.

"Oh bad move Gil," George shook his head along with the rest of the room.

"Shut up," Grissom said at his brother before standing up and turning to Heather. "What I meant to say was, they don't need to know who I'm dating. It's not their business is it?"

"Another bad move," George grinned this time.

"Oh really," Catherine said putting on a mocking angry look.

"I thought we were friends Gris," Sara added in sticking Grissom in between a rock and a hard place.

"That is not what I mean," Grissom turned to his friends. "Oh just drop it. You all know what I mean."

"Well you are saying one of us here is not important to you," Heather decided to pitch into the fun.

"Okay too many women in the room," Grissom raised his hands in surrender. "I'm sorry I didn't inform anyone that I'm dating Heather Kessler, happy?"

"Very," Catherine grinned and went back to making the table with Lucille. She counted the number of plates and looked at the food. "You think there's enough for all of us?" She asked Lucille who nodded.

"Don't worry, George doesn't eat too much and neither does Sara," She informed Catherine who frowned.

"Why am I not surprised," She sighed and placed the plates in place.

Soon they all sat down to have lunch. The whole lunch was about everyone interrogating Grissom and Heather about their relationship. Grissom decided not to answer any of their questions however Heather answered a lot of their queries. But even she avoided answering some questions like when George asked how his brother was like in the sack. Heather just smiled at them while Grissom threw a piece of cucumber at his brother.

After lunch, George headed to the backyard to smoke and Sara followed him after assuring Lucille that she was not going to smoke. The rest of the group sat in the living room resting their very well fed bodies.

"I think I ate too much," Lucille stretched her body in the couch with a yawn.

"We all did," Heather smiled. "It was really good."

"Sara made it and George but it was mainly Sara since George can't cook on his own to save his life," Lucille joked while Catherine smiled.

"Well Sara's husband will be happy," Heather said making Grissom and Lucille chuckle and Catherine choke on her water. "What?" She asked curiously.

"Sara's a lesbian," Lucille pointed out. "And she's dating Catherine hence the slight irony."

"Really?" She looked at Catherine who shrugged with a nod. "Well Sara I kind of thought that, but I never got that vibe from you." She said to Catherine.

"She swings both ways," Grissom said while cleaning his glasses.

"Nice way to put it genius," Catherine scowled at the man who didn't pay any notice to her expression.

"You two will make a very attractive couple though," Heather smiled genuinely at Catherine who put down her drink and grinned. "My best wishes."

"Thank you," She smiled smugly at which Grissom laughed. "Oh shut up." She threw a glare at him making him shut up at once.

Sara and George walked in while the other three thought of something to talk about yet found nothing in the depths of their minds. Sara sat down next to Catherine on the couch while George sat on the armrest of the couch and kissed the top of her head.

"You smoked," Lucille glared at Sara who frowned.

"No I didn't," Sara said defensively. "I told you I won't didn't I?"

"You still smoked," Lucille said firmly.

"Fine," Sara said before kissing Catherine taking the blonde off guard. Sara parted from the kiss and looked at Catherine who still looked surprised. "Did I smoke?" Catherine shook her head and Sara turned to Lucille with a look of triumph. "Told you."

"Sure," Lucille grinned and yawned again. "God I'm so sleepy."

"Why don't you take a nap?" George suggested but Lucille shook her head.

"Kyle will be home soon," She stretched.

"I'm not going anywhere," He kissed his wife's forehead. "You should get some rest. You didn't sleep last night either."

"How the hell did you know I was awake?" Lucille looked at her husband in surprise.

"I've been married for you long enough to sense when you're awake sweetheart," He said with a smile. "Don't worry, I'll make sure Kyle eats and take a bath. And Sara's here to make him do his homework so it's ok."

"Yeah?" She confirmed at which her husband nodded. "Okay then, I'll see you guys later if you're going to be here." She got up and kissed her husband. "I love you."

"Love you too," George smiled and watched his wife until she disappeared upstairs. When he turned to his audience he saw that all of them had an 'awe' look on their faces. "What?"

"You're a very sweet husband," Heather stated the obvious in her emotionless tone.

"Thank you, I try," He winked and put his hands behind the back of his head. "So what's in store for you guys today?" He asked Grissom and Heather.

"Dinner plans," Grissom answered shortly.

"And you guys?" He turned to Catherine and Sara both of whom looked at each other and shrugged.

"No idea yet," Catherine said with a chuckle.

"I can take you to dinner tonight," Sara suggested grabbing everyone's attention involuntarily. "How about it?" She asked with a smile.

"Sure, I'd love that," Catherine nodded and snuggled into Sara catching the brunette off guard. But Sara relaxed and put an arm around her, pulling Catherine closer. When she faced the room she realized that everyone was staring at them.

"What?" She asked curiously.

"You two are a very attractive couple," Grissom sounded surprised. "I never saw it before."

"Thanks Gil," Catherine grinned at her friend's surprise. She saw the clock on the wall and wondered when she would see the boy genius again. "When's Kyle getting home?" She asked curiously.

"He should be home soon since he doesn't have swimming practice today," George scratched his well kept beard. "He's supposed to catch a ride with our neighbor."

"He swims?" Sara asked curiously. "How come I don't know about that?"

"He just joined the team," George explained. "Apparently he wants to go pro though I doubt he'll ever choose swimming over studies. I told him it's up to him."

"He shouldn't bypass studies," Grissom put in making George frown.

"Who says he will?" George asked leaning forward and facing his brother angrily. "He's smart kid, he knows what's good for him and what's not."

"That doesn't mean that you should let a growing child make decisions for himself," Grissom pointed out frankly.

"He's just a kid at the moment. Just because he shows some seriousness in a sport isn't something to worry about," George said seriously. "So maybe this discussion can wait until he at least graduates high school don't you think?"

"Parents need to think about their children's future beforehand," Grissom spat angrily as if there was something hidden behind his words. "Or else they will end up ruining their lives on their own."

"Why are you getting so pissed about this anyway? I have no doubt in mind that he will finish college and with honors too," George pointed a finger at his brother. "Whatever he wants to do after that is his choice, because it's his life. I trust him to do the right thing. He is a smart boy."

"Just because he's smart doesn't mean you have to become sloppy," Grissom said sternly. "You should learn to be more of a responsible father George."

George looked as if he had been slapped hard on the face. Catherine felt Sara squirm behind her before she spoke.

"He's a great father Gris," Sara snapped in an irritated tone. "Kyle couldn't have had a better dad then George so don't stay stuff like that."

George smiled at her appreciatively while Grissom leaned back and gave in. If Kyle's mother says so, he knew what he had to say would make no difference whatsoever. Since the air around them turned a bit tense, George decided to turn on the television without talking. After surfing a lot of channels, George stopped and leaned back with a smile. Everyone around him turned to him with their eyebrows raised but he just shrugged and turned up the volume. Because in his mind, there was nothing better to lift anyone's mood than watching a little bit of Tom and Jerry.

Sure enough the next hour passed with laughter and jokes as they watched the cartoons without talking. Even Heather laughed and none of them but Grissom has ever seen her do that. They were still enjoying the show when Kyle walked in.

"Why are you all watching a cartoon?" Kyle asked putting down his bag.

"We were bored," George stood up and put an arm around his son's shoulder. "How was school?"

"It was alright," Kyle yawned. "The physic test was easier than I thought."

"Good," George patted on his son's head. "Now go take a bath and come have lunch okay?"

"Where's mom?" Kyle asked scanning the people in the room and waving hello to Grissom, Catherine and Sara.

"She's taking a nap," Sara stood up stretching her body as she went.

"Okay. Hey Uncle Grissom," Kyle turned to the man and looked at the woman sitting next to her. "Hello, I'm Kyle." He waved at Heather.

"Heather Kessler, nice to meet you," Heather introduced herself in the most formal manner making the boy slightly shocked.

"Your girlfriend uncle?" Kyle asked in a coy tone.

"Yes," Grissom answered shortly yet with a smile. Kyle opened his mouth to say something but Sara cut him short.

"You can talk to everyone later," Sara stepped forward and put her hands on the boy's shoulder pushing him towards the stairs. "For now, you're going to take a bath."

"Fine, fine, I'm going," Kyle hunched his back and ran up the stairs.

"Why is such a little boy doing physics?" Heather asked George.

"He's a bit advanced than other kids," George said simply. "So he's in a special school. He chose physics since he's drawn to Theoretical Physics somehow." He turned to Sara who grinned.

"Why am I not surprised," Catherine said under her breath making Sara scowl at her. "I'll heat up the food for Kyle." She stood up and headed to the kitchen with Sara following her closely.

"Need any help?" Sara asked while Catherine busied herself.

"No I'm good," She smiled and straightened up turning the microwave on. "Why did you follow me here?" She asked with a grin.

"I don't know," Sara shrugged and leaned on the table. "Can't I follow you here?" She asked raising an eyebrow.

"No of course you can," Catherine stepped in between Sara's legs and put her arms around Sara's neck. She looked straight into Sara's eyes and chuckled. "You're a bit turned on aren't you?" She asked frankly making Sara squirm.

"What? No, why do you say that?" Sara shrugged uncomfortably while her hands held Catherine's waist.

"Your pupils are dilated," Catherine whispered onto Sara's lips. "And you're trying to find a way to get alone with me. So I just assumed you were turned on a bit."

"Well maybe I am," Sara gulped down a lump in her throat. "You dance really well." She said as her defense.

"Too bad we can't have sex yet," Catherine patted her finger on Sara's lips and stepped back from the brunette who looked like a little girl who was deprived of candy she was promised she would get. Catherine chuckled and took the food out of the microwave and got out of the kitchen.

"Argh," Sara groaned and ran her fingers through her hair before sitting on the kitchen table. "I'm going to kill Lucille and George, this is all their fault." She mumbled to herself and sat on the table. She swung her legs back and forth, thinking about where she stood at the moment in her life.

So she can't yet have sex with Catherine. But why? Is it because she didn't want to go so fast with Catherine? But she was drawn to that woman physically and emotionally like a moth to a flame. She couldn't understand it; maybe it was because she craved someone else's warmth badly or because she actually wanted to move on. But she knew that the last part wasn't as true. She could never totally move on from Lily yet she had been left with no choice. And somehow she felt as if it was betraying the relationship she had with her by moving on with Catherine. It was confusing and her attraction towards Catherine wasn't helping the situation at all.

But maybe it wasn't wrong to move on and leave the past behind. She loved Lily still, and she probably always will. She respected her above anyone else. But that doesn't mean she can't move forward. And if it was with Catherine, the better. Because the blonde understood her, cared for her and is one of the greatest women Sara had known. So why not? Maybe it was something else. Maybe it was because she knew in her mind that Catherine was not ready.

The blonde was obviously still hung up on Alan. And that had happened just a few days ago, so she can't expect Catherine to just forget about everything and take her hand. Catherine had already offered what she could for the moment, she had given Sara a chance to be in her life and that also on her own. Maybe that's all Catherine can offer at the moment and that might be just what Sara needed for now too. If her arousal peaked there were always ways to get rid of it on her own. So maybe until Catherine could offer more, she'll just back away. For now, they'll just share their hurt, sadness and happiness whenever they need. The physical consummation can come later. It wasn't as important anyway, what makes a relationship was not sex, it's more than that.

"Sar? Why are you sitting alone in the dark?" Kyle's voice came from the doorway snapping Sara out of her thoughts.

"Hey buddy," Sara jumped off the table with a smile. "I was just thinking. Aren't you hungry?"

"I came to get some juice," Kyle pointed at the refrigerator. He washed a glass and poured himself what looked like cranberry juice and took a sip from it. "Will you be here for a while? I need some help with my Math."

"Sure, no problem," Sara put an arm around her son and walked out of the kitchen. "Just call me when you're done eating okay?"

Kyle nodded and sat down at the table where Catherine sat in the chair next to him. She smiled at Sara who smiled back and went back to the living room. George was still watching the cartoon while Heather and Grissom were engrossed in their own conversation. When Sara sat down, Heather and Grissom stood up.

"We're going to go for now," Grissom said with a sigh. "I'm supposed to meet a colleague of mine and then we have to make those reservations."

"Alright," George nodded. "I'll see you tomorrow for lunch then. We still need to talk about that thing."

"I'll call you," Grissom nodded and turned to the front door. "I'll see you all later." He waved and opened the door for Heather.

"It was nice to see you all again," Heather smiled, specifically at Sara who nodded. "I'll see you later hopefully." With that, she exited the door with Grissom following her closely. When the door closed, George sighed.

"You okay there big guy?" Sara asked curiously.

"Sometimes he's too critical of everything I do," George whined angrily. "He says he doesn't want to be like dad but he is just like him when it comes to me."

"That's just because he loves you George," Sara stated the obvious fact. "He's over protective of you, like any brother is."

"Hey I got to where I am all by myself," George said irritably. "Neither he nor dad was around. Just because he found me after 22 years doesn't mean he has the right to be my father. I love the man but sometimes he just has no clue whatsoever."

"That's your brother alright," Sara chuckled. "And maybe he's just trying to make up for the time he missed out in your life."

"He needs to learn a better way to do that," George frowned and turned off the television. "I'm running out of patience with him now."

"We all feel like that sometimes with him," Sara crossed her legs and leaned back on the couch. "But he has a good heart. We just have to remember that."

"Or he just needs to learn a better way to deal with human beings," George repeated stubbornly.

"And what are the chances of that happening?" Sara laughed. "It'll go away honey. Maybe Heather can put some sense into him."

"If anyone can, it's probably that chick," George nodded. "She's hot huh?"

"Yeah, she is very hot," Sara agreed. Just then Catherine and Kyle joined them making Sara avoid the conversation completely. " Homework?" She asked Kyle who frowned. "Okay maybe a bit later then." She chuckled.

"Can I play some video games before studying?" He asked his father who nodded in agreement. "Thanks." He hurried in front of the television and sat down only a foot away from the set.

"Whoa, sit a bit far from the tv buddy," Sara called forcing Kyle to move a bit farther. "Good boy."

"You make me sound like a little boy," Kyle whined.

"You are one," Sara pointed out the obvious.

"Hey hey, you are supposed to do your homework before games big guy," Lucille's voice startled everyone in the room. She was walking to the couch, wearing what looked like a shirt of George. It was too big for her but it looked very nice on her, according to Catherine that was.

"But dad said I can play," Kyle got to his knees and put down the joystick.

"Of course he did," Lucille pushed on the back of George's head and turned to Kyle again. "If you want to catch that movie today, you will have to do your work first honey. So you choose."

"Fine," Kyle put the playstation back in the rack with a pout and turned to Sara. "Want to help me?"

"Sure, let's go," Sara stood up and followed the boy to his study room.

Sara enjoyed herself brushing up on subjects she had missed after college. She had always loved Physics and Math, maybe because she was a natural at it. And the things Kyle was focusing on were the same things she was drawn to as a growing child. She couldn't help notice that the boy was very much like her. Even growing up with Lucille and George, he had the same ideas and inhibitions as her. She was relieved and proud that her son was growing up to be a fine young man.

"I think I understand Scale Invariants," Kyle said tiredly as he flipped through the pages. They had already finished his Math homework and were now going through his project for Physics. "But Conformal Invariants is still a blur."

"Why are you studying this?" Sara asked confused. "It's not in your syllabus."

"I know, but if I integrate this in my project I'll be drowning in marks," Kyle said proudly. "So maybe you can help me?"

"Of course. Well if you understand Scale Invariants then the rest is quite easy," Sara pointed out tying her hair into a pony tail. "See all the scale invariant theories are all conformally invariant too."

"How so?" Kyle asked going through his notes.

"Well conformal group has subgroups," Sara pointed at an equation on the book. "It has isometrics of Poincare Group along with the scaling transformations…" She was cut short when Lucille walked into the room.

"You guys almost done?" She asked her son.

"Pretty much," Kyle nodded. "I've finished all the homework. We're just working on the project now."

"Well we have to leave soon if you want to catch the movie," Lucille explained. "The project is due at the end of the month?"

"Yeah I can do it later," Kyle closed the books and arranged them neatly on the table. "I'll go get ready now then?"

"Okay," Lucille smiled at her son before he hurried to his room. "He needs a break." She said to Sara who stood up and cracked her back.

"Yeah, I didn't know he was doing all this now," Sara pointed at the books.

"Oh I wanted to ask you," Lucille leaned on the doorframe. "You're going to be here for his birthday right?"

"That's not until December," Sara pointed out to Lucille who grinned.

"Yes I know, I'm just making sure," Lucille said calmly.

"Yeah of course I'll be here," Sara nodded and checked her watch. "Oh shit I have to make reservations for dinner or else I'm screwed."

"First date?" Lucille asked cheekily at which Sara scowled.

While Sara called the restaurant, Lucille walked into the living room and forced her husband to go and get ready for the movie. It was a lot of work since the man was hooked to the television and was refusing to hear her talk. But in the end, a woman always gets her way and George sulked his way into the room.

"Okay got reservations," Sara announced as she sat down on the couch and sighed.

"Good for you," Lucille patted on her friend's shoulder and headed to the stairs. "I'm going to go get ready too."

"Hey I think we're going to head off," Sara called making Lucille stop at her tracks. "We have to get home now if we want to make the reservations."

"It takes you that long for you to get ready these days?" Lucille smirked at Sara who rolled her eyes.

"No, but we have to walk because I'm pretty sure Mia took the car," Sara explained. "And I don't take long but Cath does." She added with a smirk.

"Oh shut up," Catherine pouted and crossed her arms.

"Okay, so we'll see you later then?" Lucille asked.

"You bet," Sara stood up along with Catherine. "Give a kiss for Kyle from me. Tell him I'll help him with the project tomorrow."

"Alright," Lucille smiled. "Have fun tonight."

"Thanks, you too," Catherine answered and followed Sara out the front door. The sun was slowly going down and the air was cool. The sky was beautiful that it took a minute for Catherine to tear her eyes off it.

"Ready to go?" Sara asked softly.

"Yeah," Catherine nodded and took Sara's hand. Sara squeezed the blonde's hand and walked down the steps and to the street.

Sara took the long route back to the apartment. It was a beautiful evening and she wanted to spend as much time outside as she could with Catherine. It felt good holding her hand and walking down the quiet streets. The cold breeze was calming and the light sunlight felt good against her skin. She realized how much she had missed San Francisco as they walked their way to the apartment. Soon enough they entered Mia's apartment.

"What time is the reservation?" Catherine asked sitting down on the couch.

"Eight," Sara answered and checked the clock. It was going to be six so they had enough time to get ready and make the reservations still. "How long do you need to get ready?" She asked with a grin.

"I don't take that much time honey," Catherine pouted. "Just 30 minutes."

"That's not much?" Sara grinned and sat down next to Catherine. The blonde nodded making Sara laugh. "Okay, you can jump in the shower when I'm done then."

"Sure," Catherine laid down, putting her head in Sara's lap. "We have a few minutes until then right?"

"Yeah we do," Sara said playing with Catherine's smooth hair.

"I need to call Nancy to check up on Linds," Catherine said grabbing her phone. She dialed and waited for an answer with her eyes closed since it felt really good with Sara playing with her hair.

"Hello?"

"Nancy, it's me," Catherine said with a sigh. "How's things?"

"Good, good," Nancy answered calmly. "Linds is not here right now. She and Jeremy went to a party nearby."

"A party?" Catherine asked sternly.

"Stop worrying. The parents are present at the party, I checked," Nancy said still in her calm voice.

"When are they supposed to be home?" Catherine asked.

"I told them to be back by midnight," Nancy answered.

"That's a bit late don't you think?" Catherine's paranoia hit her.

"They'll be fine Cath," Nancy sighed. "They have to come home to me, so they'll be careful as to what they do in the party."

"Just call me when she gets home?" Catherine ignored her sister's reasoning.

"Okay," Nancy agreed. "How's your trip?"

"It's very good," Catherine said smiling at Sara. "I have to go now. So just get Lindsey to call me when she gets home okay?"

"Sure," Catherine almost heard her sister nod through the phone. "Enjoy your trip."

"Thanks," Catherine hung up the phone and closed her eyes again.

"You okay there?" Sara asked with a hint of worry in her voice.

"Is it wrong that I can't trust my own daughter now?" Catherine asked with her eyes still closed.

"No, when she's at that age I guess it is okay to lose a little bit of trust," Sara scrunched her face in thought. "But not trusting her at all might be a problem."

"I know there's a line she won't cross," Catherine said firmly. "But day by day, it's becoming very hard to believe that she actually sees that line."

"She's a teenager Cath," Sara ran a finger over Catherine's cheek. "They see the line, they just don't think it's that important. But that said she is YOUR daughter. I'm sure she has the sense to see what's right and what's wrong."

"I hope she does," Catherine opened her eyes to meet the deep browns filled with concern.

"Just have a little bit of trust on her," Sara smiled. "She just might surprise you, in a good way."

Catherine just nodded and smiled back. She snuggled into Sara who kept playing with her hair and rubbed her back over her t-shirt. She felt the strong urge to sleep but remembering that they had dinner plans, she fought the urge. She didn't know for how long she laid like that. But too soon for her liking, Sara shook her softly making her open her eyes.

"I'm going to take a shower," Sara said softly. "I'll call you when I'm done?"

"Okay," Catherine sat up and wiped her face.

"Don't fall asleep again," Sara called before walking into the room. She didn't hear Catherine's response before she closed the door behind her.

Sara laid her clothes on the bed and jumped into the shower. The cold water hit her body sending chills all over her body. She ran her hands over her hair letting it soak and pressed her forehead against the tiles. She remembered the shower she shared with Catherine. The image of the blonde's naked body, wet and glowing with the water, her hands running over her own body with her eyes closed made it extremely hard for Sara to not touch her. Sara sighed and ran her hand down her own body, running her hand over her hardened nipples. Her mind formed the images of Catherine dancing, while her hands made its way down her stomach between her legs. She realized that had been wet all along, turned on beyond anything. Sara's mind replayed Catherine bending down seductively making her own hands move on its own accord. The water softly sliding down her body mixed with her own wetness. Her fingers met her clit emitting a soft sigh from her lips. In her mind was one thing and one thing only; a naked, wet Catherine dancing in front of her. Her fingers moved the way she liked it as she let the image in her head play over and over again, making it more vivid with every passing second. Her grip on the shower knob tightened when her fingers entered her softly. She threw her head back letting her wet hair stick to her back. Sara felt as if Catherine's hands were on her neck, her lips were on hers, making the movements of her fingers increase the pace. Her knees started to weaken, her body became rigid and she tightened around her own fingers. She held the shower knob for dear life and pressed her forehead harder on the tiles.

"Fuck…" A soft whisper escaped her lips blowing the water on her lips. She took a few seconds to calm down before slipping her fingers out of her. She finally opened her eyes and took in a deep breath. When she could form thoughts in her head again, she realized that she was wasting a lot of water and probably time too. She quickly finished the shower and stepped out, wrapping a towel around her.

"Cath," Sara opened the door and called a bit loudly. "Bathroom's free."

"Okay," Catherine appeared at the end of the hallway looking very sleepy. "You look flushed." She commented on the blush visible on the brunette's cheeks.

"Oh…yeah…happens after showers," Sara said quickly before turning away from Catherine.

"Sure it does," Catherine's answer was filled with mischief. "I'll try to keep my shower quick." She said onto Sara's back, breathing on her skin.

"Great," Sara closed her eyes at the contact. When she heard the bathroom door close, she turned around and dropped the towel and started to get ready. She put on her black jeans and olive green t-shirt and checked her reflection from the mirror. She didn't look too bad. She quickly fixed her face and hair when she heard the water stop running from the bathroom.

"That was quick," She mumbled to herself, grabbed her jacket and stepped out of the room.

Sara made herself comfortable in the couch and decided to watch the television until Catherine was ready. It took Catherine another 15 minutes to get ready. The blonde was wearing a simple, spaghetti strapped dark periwinkle blue dress. It stopped below her knees and looked stunning on the blonde.

"Shall we?" Catherine smiled beautifully at the brunette who turned off the television and stood up. Sara couldn't stop staring at the blonde. "Whenever you're done staring at me that is." Catherine added cheekily.

"I'm sorry, but you look stunningly beautiful," Sara smiled stupidly.

"Thank you," Catherine blushed.

"Come on, we'll take Mia's car," Sara grabbed the keys from the hook nearby and headed to the door. Catherine followed the brunette out and closed the door.

They walked into Aliotos restaurant and sat at a table near the window. The view was beautiful during the night. The sea was glittering, the boats were softly waving and the sky was beautiful. Catherine was lost at the sight when the waiter brought them their menus and asked them if they wanted something to drink. She let Sara order the drinks while she went through the menu.

"You are vegetarian," Catherine pointed out when the waiter left the table. "Why did you come to a place which specializes in seafood?"

"You once told me you loved it," Sara said without looking up from the menu. "This is the best place to get seafood in San Francisco."

"That was years ago," Catherine said with amusement.

"Guess I have a good memory," Sara smiled at the menu. "You should see what you want to eat before he comes back." Sara looked up and pointed at the waiter.

"I can't believe you brought me here just because I'd like the food," Catherine said while going through the menu.

"Well next time we'll go to a place I like," Sara smirked. "So we'll be even."

"Deal," Catherine laughed.

The waiter brought their drinks and took their order, leaving them alone again. To Sara's amusement, Catherine talks a lot during dates. More than talking, it was questions. Catherine was a very curious person, probably what makes her a very good CSI. They talked about each other mostly, getting to know themselves. It turned out to be a great night, an interesting first date. To Sara's surprise, she couldn't remember enjoying a first date as much as she had enjoyed with Catherine. She couldn't understand whether it was the blonde's interesting questions (such as, what is the weirdest thing you have done during sex or how long did your best orgasm last), or whether it was the fact that she was finally feeling like she belonged somewhere after a long time. All she knew was she was enjoying it very much and she couldn't ask for more.

Catherine as well was having the time of her life. She liked how Sara put on her charm during a date, it was new and exciting. She was getting to know things about Sara she would have never expected from the brunette. All she knew was that she was getting more attracted to Sara with every word that escaped from the brunette's lips. Soon they finished eating, Sara waited until the waiter brought back her credit card playing with Catherine's fingers that were entwined with hers.

"Did you like the food?" Sara asked without taking her eyes off their hands.

"Yes I did, it was great," Catherine smiled but Sara missed it. "I had a great time."

"Good," Sara looked up and matched the smile on Catherine's lips. "I'm glad."

Just then, the waiter brought back the card and both women walked out of the restaurant, hand in hand.

"Do you want to take a walk before we go home?" Sara asked as the ocean breeze wash over her body. Catherine nodded and Sara lead them down the steps and to the platform of the wharf. Catherine took her hand from Sara's and put her arm in Sara's arm, letting the brunette put her hand in her pockets.

"It's a nice view," Catherine said as they stopped and she leaned on the wooden rail.

"Yeah," Sara smiled at the ocean. "Here you must be cold." Sara took off her jacket and put it around Catherine's shoulders.

"Thank you," Catherine turned to Sara and stepped closer to her. "You are a wonderful person Sara." She said in a soft whisper.

"Glad you think so," Sara smiled with her hands in tact in her pockets.

"Mmmmm…" Catherine hummed before putting her hands on Sara's waist and kissing her. Sara kept her hands in her pockets while Catherine's hands raked under Sara's shirt and up her body. Her hands were cold and Sara shifted on her spot and her mouth opened slightly making it easier for Catherine to deepen the kiss.

"We should go," Sara mumbled onto Catherine's lips when they parted for air.

"Yeah," Catherine whispered in that same soft tone. She put her arm into Sara's and they headed to the car.

Sara tried to keep her mind from thinking while she drove but Catherine was making it a bit hard. The blonde took Sara's free hand and squeezed it, playing with her fingers as she did so. Catherine kissed the back of Sara's hand before putting her thumb in her mouth, sucking on it softly.

"You are going to make me crash this car," Sara took in a sharp breath.

"Really?" Catherine asked keeping Sara's finger between her teeth, running her tongue down the length.

"Yeah," Sara turned to Catherine when she stopped at the light. She smiled when Catherine took her finger out of her mouth, but to her surprise the blonde didn't give her hand back. Catherine's dress was lifted up to her thigh by the way she was sitting and she put Sara's hand on the exposed skin of her thigh. "That doesn't help." Sara grinned.

"I'm not doing anything," Catherine said coyly letting go of Sara's hands. The light turned green and Sara took off, taking her hand off Catherine's legs.

Both women walked into the apartment after a few minutes of driving. It didn't look as if Mia was still home. Catherine headed straight to the bedroom making Sara follow her automatically. The brunette closed the door behind her and locked it before turning around to see Catherine sitting on the bed looking straight at her.

"You're not going to change?" Sara asked taking off her jacket.

"No," Catherine shook her head with a beautiful smile. "Come." She asked Sara softly.

Sara sat down next to Catherine who took her hand and kissed it again. She put Sara's hand on her waist and pulled Sara close to her by pulling her by the collar of her shirt. Their lips met for a few but Catherine pulled away, kissed Sara's chin and down to her neck. But Sara backed away.

"Don't do that," Sara stood up and wiped her face.

"What? Why not?" Catherine asked in a surprised tone.

"You said we can't have sex yet," Sara recalled the afternoon. "So why are you doing that?"

"I said that because I didn't think you were ready yet," Catherine stood up and crossed her arms.

"You just ended it with him," Sara said softly. "I don't want you to rush anything with me because you think you have to or something."

"I don't think we are rushing into anything," Catherine replied firmly. "We have a long way to go from here, we both know that. I just don't think without any physical interaction, one can move forward in a relationship. Or maybe that's just me."

"It's not just you," Sara said quickly. "I just didn't want you to think that you have to do it. It's not as important to me as other things in a relationship."

"I know, but it plays a part too," Catherine said stepping closer. "And we are physically attracted to each other, big time. You can't deny that. So why not just let that part be taken care of? We are together, so we are already emotionally committed."

"I get it," Sara nodded. "I didn't want you to feel rushed into something you don't want to do."

"And here I was thinking you didn't want to do it," Catherine smiled.

"No I do. I'm so so attracted to you," Sara answered softly. When Catherine didn't reply, she shifted on her spot and bit her lips. "So now what?"

"Now you stop talking and kiss me," Catherine stepped inches from Sara and whispered.

Sara smiled and cupped Catherine's face, kissing the blonde deeply. Her hands ran down the blonde's neck and held her waist. She slithered her hand to Catherine's back and pulled the zipper of Catherine's dress down, pushing the straps down and let the dress fall on the ground. Catherine pulled Sara's t-shirt over her head and threw it on the ground taking in a good look. Sara kissed Catherine and bent down slightly, taking Catherine into her arms. She carried the blonde without parting their lips and laid her on the bed. She took in the view and admired just how beautiful Catherine was. Her curves, the smooth glowing skin, the seductive look in her eyes, the parted lips and the beautiful hair spread on the pillow was mesmerizing.

Sara laid next to Catherine, her body slightly on top of the blonde and kissed her. She pulled away from the kiss, kissed Catherine's jaw line and moved to her ear.

"You are so beautiful," She whispered onto Catherine's ear and ran her tongue down to her neck.

"Mmmmmmmmm…." Catherine moaned softly and tightened her grip on Sara's shoulders. She smiled when Sara's mouth made its way down to her chest. Sara tore off Catherine's bra from her body and threw it away, along with any rational thought forming in her mind. But she knew one thing; it has been a great night and she knew it would keep getting better with every move of Sara. It has been a wonderful start to something she knew that was going to be extremely beautiful.

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**well thats for this chapter...i can continue from here or start from the next day...you tell me what you think :) **

**thanks for reading...**


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

**Ok this one is a bit shorter than the other chapters, but i didnt want to put everything into one chapter so i decided to go with a shorter one first...hope you guys like it...and thanks for the extremely lovely reviews...i started off where i left off coz you all wanted it :)**

**To my wonderful distraction ;)**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1...ENJOY**

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Mia walked into the house feeling tired after the day she had had. It had been long and she felt depressed. She walked to her room and took a glance at Sara's bedroom door. Deciding that her friend could help her feel better, she stepped to the door and lifted her hand to knock. But then she heard a noise that told her to slowly walk away from the door and stay as far away as she could from the room for about 30 or 45 minutes. Feeling glad that her friend was feeling better, she grabbed a bottle of scotch from the cabinet and dropped on the couch.

The whole atmosphere of the living room seemed to have adapted to the depression Mia brought into it. However, inside Sara and Catherine's room, it was a whole another story. The atmosphere was hot, filled with passion and lust and it was intoxicating.

Soft moans escaped Catherine's lips as the brunette sticking to her body roamed her hands all over her half naked body. Catherine entwined her hands around Sara's neck and pulled the younger woman on top of her, pressing their bodies together. Sara cupped the blonde's face and pressed her lips hard on hers before she let her tongue run over her lips and sucking on them. With a moan, the blonde granted access to the brunette's hungry tongue. Sara opened her eyes and pulled her lips away from Catherine's making the blonde frown slightly.

"Now now sweety, let's not pout," Sara mumbled onto Catherine's lips as she raked her hand over the blonde's body holding her warm sides. "I promise I'm not done with just that," She could see the smile on Catherine's face and the excitement in her increased rapidly.

Catherine held Sara's waist tightly as Sara ran her tongue down her neck, sucking on the perfect spots which were making her moan out loud. She was impressed by how well Sara's knows what to do to make someone's mind stop working. She wrapped her legs around Sara, pressing their bodies closer. Sara looked up and licked her way up to the blonde's lips, claiming them in her name again. She sucked on the blonde's delicious lips forcefully, pushing her tongue in her mouth exploring the warmth of it. While she kissed the blonde passionately, her hands raked down the blonde's neck and chest. Her thumb ran over Catherine's already aroused nipple just for a mere second. But just like that, she removed her hands away from the blonde's breasts.

"Awe…" Catherine mumbled onto Sara's lips who sniggered at the adorable expression on her partners' face.

"Shhh…." Sara ran her tongue over Catherine's lips softly. With a sly look on her face, she kissed Catherine's chin and sucked it loudly. She made her way down the blonde's neck, sucking on several spots on the blonde's neck leaving soft marks on her neck.

She kept sucking on the Catherine's neck as her thumbs ran lazy circles around the blonde's hardened nipples. But she was very careful not to touch them since she knew that it was exactly what Catherine wanted. All of a sudden, Catherine's hand got hold of Sara's and put the brunette's hands over her breasts, right where she wanted her to be.

"Uh uh," Sara held Catherine's wrist and put her hands over the blonde's head. "If you take your hand off from there OR if you touch me, I'm going to stop."

Catherine gave Sara an unbelievable look at which Sara grinned. The brunette kissed softly on the blonde's already pouted lips. Her fingers ran down Catherine's sides, sending chill up her body.

"Tease," Catherine mumbled in between gritted teeth making Sara chuckle. The brunette's hands lazed up Catherine's stomach, running her fingers over Catherine's very sensitive belly button, grabbing one of her aroused nipples. Sara pinched Catherine's nipples in between her fingers making the blonde heave her chest upwards with a loud moan.

"I didn't know teases did things like that," Sara whispered into Catherine's ears, biting her earlobe hard emitting another moan from Catherine. "Or that." Sara smirked.

Sara's tongue licked its way down Catherine's neck until it was on her breasts. She ran her tongue over Catherine's nipples, barely touching it forcing the blonde to heave her breasts upwards again. Sara pushed the blonde onto the bed and wrapped her tongue around Catherine's nipples, sucking on them hardly. A loud and pleasure filled moan escaped Catherine's lips. The blonde bit her lips not to moan out loud again as Sara sucked on her nipple until it was hard to the core. Catherine held her hands together over her head as she threw her head back in pleasure while Sara's mouth sucked on one of her nipples and her fingers played with her other one.

Sara looked up to see Catherine's head thrown back and eyes shut with pleasure. With a smug grin, her tongue left Catherine's nipples and replaced it on her lips while her fingers were still playing teasingly with her nipples. She devoured on the blonde's lips showing her how much she had craved for her taste.

Catherine groaned into Sara's mouth as she tightened the grip of her legs around Sara's waist. As she tried to stay sane and rationale about the world, Sara, in mere seconds pulled down her panties leaving her completely naked under the younger gaze. Catherine felt her cheeks burn up as the brunette lifted her body, taking a long look at the blonde's naked body. She felt her arousal increase when Sara licked her lips and bent down, taking one of her nipples into her warm mouth. The long slender fingers of Sara ran down Catherine's cheeks, down her neck, along the sides of her breasts and on to her flat stomach. She ran a circled around Catherine's belly button, emitting a giggle from the blonde's lips. Sara looked up to see Catherine biting her lips, which was curled into a wide smile.

The brunette couldn't help but grin onto the older woman's lips before her tongue pulled away from the erected bud and kissed it way down to the source of the beautiful giggle. She ran her tongue over her belly button, almost touching the blonde's skin. Her tongue curled into the blonde's belly button making the blonde hiss out loud. With a smug grin, Sara ran her tongue down the blonde's stomach and in between her legs. Her nose met the aroma of Catherine and she could feel the heat in between her own legs grow immensely. She lifted her head up slightly to see how wet the blonde was. A grin curved on her lips as she looked up to meet the lust filled eyes of her lover.

"Quite excited are you?" Sara placed a quick kiss on Catherine's folds, forcing the blonde to shut her eyes, grabbing her own hair. Sara blew softly onto Catherine's core.

"Don't play with me," Catherine said in between gritted teeth again. "Not anymore, please baby."

Without any other teasing, Sara spread the blonde's legs a bit more before kissing the quite wet mound that awaited her. Sara felt Catherine's finger rake through her hair which made her snap her head back.

"Hey, I told you that you can't touch me," Sara said putting Catherine's hand back over her head.

"Oh come on," Catherine protested, pouting at the brunette who shook her head.

"Nuh uh, I will stop if you touch me," Sara ran her finger up and down Catherine's clit making the blonde moan out loud without taking her eyes off the deep browns in front of her. "You don't want me to stop now do you?" She quirked her head to the sides making Catherine bite her lip.

"Fine," Catherine sighed heavily.

"Good girl," Sara kissed Catherine again before placing her head back in place in between the blonde's legs.

Sara ran her tongue over Catherine's erect clit before she started to suck on it forcefully. She sucked greedily on the blonde's clit until Sara could see that the blonde was quite close to her orgasm. She clearly had teased Catherine a bit too much. With a grin, Sara ran her tongue down Catherine's clit and pushed her tongue into Catherine's very wet opening making the blonde push herself on her face. With a smile, Sara removed her tongue from Catherine's opening and placed it on her clit again, biting it softly. She saw Catherine grab the sheets tightly as she groaned very loudly. The brunette ran her thumb over Catherine's nipples as she sucked playfully on her clit, flicking and biting it as she went along. When she knew that Catherine couldn't hold in her orgasm any longer, she pushed her tongue back into her opening, fucking her with her tongue. One of her thumbs replaced her tongue on Catherine's clit, massaging it as the blonde heaved her waist upwards, pressing the brunette's face onto her as hard as she could.

With a loud grunt of pleasure, Catherine tightened her legs around Sara's head as she came over the woman who was fucking her throughout her orgasm. When Sara felt the blonde ease down, she licked her clean and lifted her head up to meet the blonde's eyes. But her eyes were closed shut and one of her hands was grabbing the sheet tightly while the other was grabbing her hair. Sara licked her lips, tasting Catherine happily as she waited for her lover to open her eyes. When the blonde finally opened her eyes, Sara grinned at her and kissed her. She let Catherine taste herself from her mouth before she let the blonde catch her breath again.

"Hi," Sara said softly onto the blonde's lips making Catherine smile.

"Hey to you too," Catherine's voice came croaky. "Oh God…" She moaned out loud when two of Sara's slender fingers entered her without any notice.

"I didn't say I was done yet," Sara mumbled mischievously, licking the blonde's cheek. Her fingers moved in and out of Catherine very slowly.

"Yeah…you didn't," Catherine grabbed Sara's shoulders, digging her nails into the brunette's skin. She raked her hand down to Sara's bra, unclasping it and letting it fall on the bed. "Take this off first." Catherine tugged on Sara's jeans.

The brunette gave her a questioning look before sitting up, unbuttoning her jeans with her free hand and keeping her fingers intact inside Catherine. But she knew she needed two hands to do what Catherine wanted her to do. She lazily slipped her fingers out of the blonde and got off the bed. Catherine lifted her upper body slightly, biting her lips as she watched the brunette slipped out of her jeans and let it fall to her feet.

"Nuh uh," Catherine stopped the brunette from getting back into bed. "I don't want any clothes on you." She pointed at Sara who raised an eyebrow and smiled.

Catherine sat at the edge of the bed and pulled Sara towards her. She kissed the younger woman's stomach while she slowly pulled Sara's panties down. Catherine kissed her way down while Sara ran her fingers through the blonde's hair, humming softly at her actions.

"Lay back down," Sara said softly making Catherine grin. When Catherine kept sucking on her stomach, Sara pushed the blonde back on to the bed. The blonde scooted up and laid down, her head resting on one of the pillows as Sara crawled in and joined her, laying carefully on top of her. Sara kissed Catherine hard straddling one of Catherine's thighs.

"I believe I was in the middle of something when you interrupted me?" Sara slurred her words slightly. Sara kissed Catherine's neck before sucking on her flesh making Catherine moan again. She trailed her fingers down Catherine's sides and between her legs, teasing the blonde's clit.

"I thought you were done teasing me," Catherine sighed heavily loving the movements of Sara's fingers.

"I am," Sara mumbled onto Catherine's neck and pushed two of her fingers inside the blonde again. "See?" She moved her fingers in and out as slowly as the first time, making Catherine heave her hips up to match her movements.

"Yeah," Catherine moaned loudly. She raked her hands down Sara's sides and pushed one hand between the brunette's legs. Her finger lazed over Sara's clit, feeling the wetness between the brunette's legs.

"Mmmmmmmmmmm," Sara hummed as the movement of her fingers fastened in pace. "Ahhhh shit," A loud moan escaped Sara's lips when Catherine pushed a finger inside her sneakily. Sara stopped the movements of her fingers enjoying the soft movements of Catherine's hand.

"Did I distract you?" Catherine hummed onto Sara's neck as she added another finger into Sara's wet opening.

"Mmmmmmmm," Sara repeated but she managed to move her fingers this time. Her fingers pushed deeper into Catherine, increasing her pace pushing Catherine harder onto the bed. Her hips moved along with her hand, fucking herself on Catherine's fingers.

Sara added another finger into Catherine groan who threw her head back hard on the pillow. Catherine felt her mind stop working, her heart beating fast as Sara's fingers twisted inside of her, rubbing against her walls and pushing deep inside her. The brunette curled her fingers up as she fucked Catherine, making the older woman's loud moans escape into the room. Sara's hips moved faster increasing her pace along with her fingers. She bent down and sucked on Catherine's neck, biting on her flesh as she enjoyed the feeling of Catherine's fingers inside her.

Sara felt Catherine tighten around her fingers but it didn't make her stop. She pushed her thumb on the blonde's clit and fastened the pace of her fingers, ramming hard into the blonde. Her hips moved fast along with her hand, throwing her to the edge of her orgasm. Sara closed her eyes feeling every bit of Catherine's finger inside of her, pushing in and out, touching just the right places. While Sara was lost in her own pleasure, Catherine gripped the sheets with her free hand and bucked her hips against Sara's hand since she couldn't hold her orgasm in any longer. She let out a soft scream and threw her head back hard on the pillow. She couldn't remember the last time she was fucked like that, hard and thorough just the way she liked it. Sara rode her through the orgasm hard until she finally relaxed under the younger woman's touch. But to Catherine's surprise, the brunette didn't stop. Sara's mouth was still on her neck, her thumb lazily moving on Catherine's clit, her hips moving beautifully yet hard against Catherine's hands and her fingers fucking Catherine as hard as she was before.

"Oh God…" Catherine moaned out loudly as her orgasm hit her again unexpectedly. Just then, she felt Sara tighten around her fingers and she knew the younger woman couldn't hold it in any longer than she could. Taking a chance, Catherine pushed her thumb on Sara's clit as hard as she could.

"Fuck…Cath…" Sara moaned onto Catherine's neck before biting hard on her flesh. Both of them knew that would leave a mark that wouldn't leave for a few days but neither of them cared. They were both lost in their own pleasure, riding each other through the orgasms that hit both their bodies.

Both women moved in sync, their bodies bucked against each other, moans escaped their lips, fingers got soaked by each other and the pleasure lasted longer than either of them had expected. Catherine finally went limp under Sara who stopped the movement of her fingers and her hips. She laid on top of Catherine, breathing heavily and recovering from her orgasm. When she finally lifted her head, she saw that Catherine had her eyes closed, biting her lips and breathing as heavily as she was. She slipped her fingers out of Catherine and ran them up the blonde's body and pressed them against her lips. Catherine finally opened her eyes and smiled at Sara before slyly licking the brunette's fingers.

"Damn," Catherine sighed heavily when Sara lifted herself from Catherine's fingers and laid down beside her.

"Yeah," Sara took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She felt Catherine snuggled into her so she wrapped her arm around the blonde and held her close. "Did I make you sleepy?" She asked softly.

"I will be in a few minutes," Catherine sniggered and kissed the side of Sara's breast.

"I think I will be too," Sara stifled a yawn with a smile. "But I need some water first." She sat up throwing the blonde off balance. "Want some?"

"Yeah I think that would do good," Catherine said getting out of bed.

"Where are you going?" Sara asked taking her t-shirt from the ground and putting on her panties.

"To the bathroom," Catherine pointed and walked into the room giving Sara a beautiful view of her back. She turned around before closing the door to see Sara staring at her making her chuckle. "Are you done staring?"

"Huh?" Sara looked up to meet Catherine's mischievous eyes and smiled shyly. "Yeah…for now." She added with a wink.

Sara put on her t-shirt when Catherine closed the door with a chuckle. After straightening her messed up hair, she stepped out of the room and to the kitchen. But she stopped at her tracks when she saw Mia sitting in the living room couch, her legs crouched to her chest and her chin resting on her knees. She looked lost in her own thoughts and didn't even look as if she noticed Sara.

"Mia?" Sara asked softly, stepping next to her friend and crouching down to meet her eye. "Are you okay?"

Mia snapped out of her thoughts and shook her head. She smiled at Sara very difficultly and nodded.

"Did something happen?" Sara asked again, putting a hand on Mia's knees.

"What's wrong with the world?" Mia asked softly catching Sara off guard. That was a question no one had the answer to. And it was too deep to concern Mia, which meant that something was very wrong.

"Tell me what happened," Sara sat down next to Mia who looked straight ahead without turning to face Sara.

"We caught a pedophile today," Mia sighed. Those words itself made Sara feel uneasy. "A woman. She was kidnapping girls who were around the age of 8 and abusing them." Mia continued while Sara tried to remain calm and not let her emotions come to surface. "We thought she kidnapped just one girl since she was the only girl reported missing in the area. But when we raided her house, there were like 15 little girls trapped in the basement. No food, barely clothed, sick, dehydrated and two of them barely alive." Mia covered her face between her legs. "Turns out, this woman had been taking girls from different states and bringing them here before anyone noticed they were missing."

"That's sick," Sara hissed angrily making Mia lift her head up again.

"They were little girls Sar," Mia sighed, her voice got croaky. "The oldest one in them was 9 years old. They have a whole life to live and now they have their childhood taken away from them."

"Yeah…" Sara agreed, her own past creeping up to her. She tried to push it back to the dingy corner of her head but she was failing.

"Trading of women, drugs, murder, rape, discrimination, hate, that's what this world has come to," Mia said seriously. "This world needs to be wiped clean so that it can start over with a clean slate."

Mia grabbed the almost empty bottle from the floor and took a swig. "I hate this bloody job sometimes," Mia continued. "When the little girl grabbed onto me, I didn't know what to say to make her fears go away," She choked slightly. "All I could say was 'it's going to be alright', when I knew I was lying. For her, it will never be alright anymore. She will live with that fear, those memories haunting her for the rest of her life."

"Yeah…" Sara repeated, unable to say anything else. She tried to brush away thoughts she didn't want to have in her head as she closed her eyes but it kept repeating in her head over and over again.

"Kids, they are always so vulnerable," Mia sighed heavily. "And people take advantage of that."

"They do," Sara nodded and squeezed Mia hands. Taking in a deep breath, she tried to relax. "But Mia, you saved those children's life today. You saved them from being trapped in a nightmare for the rest of their life."

"It doesn't help knowing what they went through all that time I couldn't help them," Mia turned to Sara. Her eyes were read. She was drunk yes, but it was more than that. She looked worn out.

"I know, but sometimes that's all we can do," Sara ran her hand over Mia's hair. "And they will always be grateful for what you did. For finding them, for rescuing them. Just be glad that you opened a door to a room filled with children who were still alive, than to a room filled with bodies."

"I know," Mia closed her eyes tightly as if trying not to think about it.

"You did a great thing today," Sara kissed Mia on the cheek. "And you need to rest now so that you can keep doing great things tomorrow."

"It doesn't feel like I did anything for them," Mia leaned into Sara's chest and rested her head.

"It's okay sweetie," Sara patted on Mia's arm. "You did a lot for them. Trust me, they are grateful for you."

"I don't know," Mia mumbled.

"Come on, let's take you to bed," Sara stood up, pulling Mia along with her. But the younger woman stumbled and went to fall down on the couch before Sara caught her. "Whoa, okay you're too drunk for that." She picked her friend up into her arms and turned around to see Catherine at the end of the hallway. "Could you open her bedroom door for me?" Sara asked the blonde who quickly did as she was told.

Sara put Mia on her bed under her covers, placed a kiss on her forehead and turned off the lights. She took one look at her friend who snuggled into the pillow nearby before closing the door and turning to Catherine.

"She had a rough day," Sara sighed heavily at which Catherine nodded.

"Will she be okay?" Catherine asked when Sara put an arm around her shoulders and lead her to their room.

"Yeah, she just needs some rest," Sara wiped her face with her free hand. "I think we all do." She added as she felt the anger and hurt from her childhood still residing in her.

"Are YOU okay?" Catherine asked slightly worried when she saw the look on Sara's face.

"Yeah, don't worry I'll be okay," Sara smiled. "Let's get some sleep yeah?"

"Okay," Catherine answered softly, not assured of Sara's words. But deciding not to push her, Catherine laid down and snuggled into Sara who wrapped her arms around her. Soon enough, Catherine dozed off leaving Sara alone in her thoughts, wide awake.

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Sara felt tired and completely worn out. Clearly the two cups of coffee she had in the morning was having no effect on her body whatsoever. She kept yawning continuously as she followed the guys into the stadium while Catherine lazed her way in with a scared look on her face. She wanted to grab Sara's hand badly but both of them had decided that the rest of the team doesn't need to know about their relationship just yet.

"Did you check up on Mia?" Catherine asked softly to which Sara nodded. "Is she okay?"

"Yeah, other than a hangover she's fine," Sara smiled and yawned again.

"Tired?" Catherine asked, biting her lower lip sneakily.

"Your fault," Sara blamed with a grin making Catherine put on a smug look.

They found their seats and Catherine frowned when she realized just how loud it was going to be in a few minutes. She looked to her left to see Sara squinting her eyes because of the sunlight. The brunette looked as if she'd rather be in any other place than there. Greg looked like a little kid, jumping up and down in his seat. Catherine had forgotten how joyful the man could be since he had become quite serious in the process of becoming a CSI. Warrick and Nick looked the exact same as when they sit in the break room watching football on television, they never change. And Catherine found that comforting.

"Hey there beautiful," Catherine was brought back to earth from her thoughts by the rude and sudden interruption by the man who sat down next to her. She felt Sara turnaround from her other side making her feel a bit secure.

"Hi," Catherine said softly and turned her attention back to the field.

"Who are you supporting today?" The man asked in a flirty tone. "I'm sure that team is bound to win with your support on their side."

"No one actually," Catherine leaned closer to Sara. The blonde didn't catch the disgusted and angry looks Sara was giving the man, but he seemed to be ignorant to anyone else around him.

"Too bad," He winked at Catherine making the blonde shift in her seat uncomfortably. "You got something on your face there." Without any notice, he reached out to touch Catherine's face making the blonde stand up.

"Back off man," Sara stood up and pushed Catherine behind her. Seeing this, Warrick, Nick and Greg stood up and face the man angrily.

"Hey I was just appreciating her beauty people," The man stood up with a sleeky grin making Sara even angrier.

"I said, back off," Sara stepped forward making Catherine scared. She took Sara's hand and pulled her back a little, telling her silently not to do anything rash.

"What is she? Your sister?" The man laughed in a manner making the brunette extremely angry.

"No, my wife actually," Sara retorted angrily. She knew the guys were looking at her, and she felt Catherine's grip loosen from her own hand knowing she had shocked her as well. But she didn't care at the moment. "So I'll say it one more time, back off."

"Alright, alright, sorry," The guy raised his hands in surrender and sat back down with a look of shock and amusement filled in his eyes.

Sara turned around to face her team, avoiding Catherine's gaze. She turned to Warrick and smiled. "You mind sitting there?"

"No," Warrick sat down on the seat Catherine as sitting on a few minutes ago.

"Your wife?" Greg asked softly with a cheeky grin.

"Easiest way to make a guy back off a woman," Sara stated simply making the three men nod in agreement. The two men sat down next to Warrick allowing Sara to let Catherine sit between her and Greg. She turned to the blonde who still looked as if she was in shock. "I'm sorry, it just came to mind."

"No, it's okay," Catherine quickly turned to Sara with a smile. "It felt nice."

"Okay then," Sara smiled warmly and squeezed Catherine's hand before letting it go. "Maybe one day…" She mumbled softly so that only she heard it.

Soon enough, the game started and everyone's attention was diverted from what had happened earlier. To Catherine's surprise, Sara actually did know football. And not only did she know football, she knew how to handle herself in a football game. Surely this wasn't Sara's first game. When the game heated up, she heated up as much as the guys sitting next to her. Catherine felt out of place but she enjoyed laughing and screaming along with the rest of her friends. It felt really good, an outlet to all the feelings that were built up inside her.

At the end of the game, everyone was hyped up, mainly Greg since his team won. He was still jumping up and down along with Warrick and Nick who were still on adrenaline high as well. Sara however had calmed down right after she stepped out of the stadium. Though her face was still flushed and she had a huge grin on her face. She looked beautiful with her hair slightly messed up, sweat breaking from her forehead and her face all reddened. All Catherine wanted to do was to jump on her and kiss her senseless, but she fought the urge.

"Oh man this was the best birthday ever," Greg said enthusiastically.

"You do know that it's not your birthday today?" Sara said with a cheeky grin making the youngest CSI scowl.

"I know that Negative Nelly," Greg said making Sara pull her tongue out at him. "Cath, you liked it?"

"A bunch of guys in tights, smacking each other on their asses? Sure, what's not to like," Catherine joked making Sara haul with laughter while the guys went into a chorus of 'oh that's just wrong'. "Sorry guys, I'm not much of a football person."

"We know," Warrick put an arm around Catherine's shoulder. "You are more of the girls fighting in jello kinda person."

"What?" Greg asked while Nick laughed and Sara tried not to laugh. "You like that Cath? Damn, you are one kinky creature aren't you?"

"Oh you have no idea Greggo," Catherine winked at Greg who grinned like a little boy. Catherine glanced at Sara who met her eye for a few seconds and looked away, with a mischievous grin playing on both their lips.

"On that note, let's go get a drink," Greg suggested while the other guys agreed. "Girls, you want to join us?"

"Sure why not," Sara shrugged and headed to their cars. But before they reached the cars, her phone rang. "Sara here."

"Sar, come to Saint Francis now," Aaron's worried voice wiped the smile off Sara's face.

"What? Why? What happened?" Sara asked stopping dead at her tracks. Catherine and the guys stopped, giving her curious looks.

"Lucille, George and Kyle were in a car accident," Aaron's voice shook. He sounded as if he was close to tears. "Just please get here?"

"I'll be right there," Sara hung up and jogged to her car without explaining or waiting for her friends. "I need to get to the hospital. I'll see you guys later."

"Wait, what happened Sara?" Catherine asked grabbing the brunette's arm before she could get into the car.

"Car accident, I really need to get to the hospital," Sara didn't say anything else but got into her car. "Are you coming?" She asked Catherine who looked shocked and confused.

"Yeah, of course," Catherine hurried to the passenger seat.

Sara looked out of the window and saw the guys standing with the same confused look Catherine had. "I'll call you guys okay?"

"Yeah, let us know if everything's okay yeah?" Nick asked at which Sara nodded with a forced smile. "And you take care."

"I will," Sara said before driving off.

Catherine had seen some major fast driving in her life but this was not at all ordinary. Sara was breaking almost all the rules of the street and she didn't even seem to give one damn about it. The brunette hadn't said one word about what had happened and Catherine didn't think that it was the time to ask. Talking while driving that fast would probably get them to the hospital faster, however not in the best conditions. It didn't take long for them to reach the hospital. Sara parked outside, grabbed Catherine's hand and hurried into the building.

It looked as if Sara knew the place really well. She didn't ask anyone for directions but lead both of them straight to where Aaron, Travis, Tracy and Mia were waiting.

"How are they?" Sara asked as soon as she saw them. She was out of breath and anyone could feel the anxiety filled in her voice. Sara's friends looked at each other, everyone opened their mouths and closed, unable to speak.

"Kyle's fine, his arm is fractured and he's got a concussion. But the doctors said there was no major trauma," Travis spoke seeing that no one else was able to. "George is in the ICU, he's somewhat stable but still unconscious. And Lucy…" Travis's voice caught on his throat and he couldn't go on. He turned around facing the wall making Sara frown angrily.

"What? What happened to her?" Sara asked Travis, grabbing the man's arm and turning him around to face her. She had never seen fear in Travis's eyes before that. And the thought itself made her heart beat faster than ever before.

"She's still in surgery," Mia spoke, her voice completely cracked. Sara turned to Mia who avoided eye contact. Sara heard her gulp down a lump in her throat. "She's bleeding internally...brain and lungs...badly...doctors are working really hard..." Mia said softly, unable to clearly explain what was going on. But Sara understood what she meant.

"And?" Sara pressed Mia to speak making the English woman frown.

"They don't think she can make it," Mia finally said silencing Sara.

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**Hopefully i'll post the next chapter really soon...lemme know what you think, good or bad, whichever :)**

**Thanks a lot for reading**


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

**It was really hard to write this chapter but i THINK i finally got it. It was getting extremely long so i cut it short for now. Hopefully i'll update the next part sooner than this one. Thanks for being patient with me and im extremely thankful for your reviews. Hope you like it.  
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**For a very special someone's grams...i meant to post this sooner, but this one's for her...**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1...REVIEW and ENJOY pls..**.

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Sara felt a huge weight pushing down on her shoulders. Her heart was beating fast, a lump grew in her throat which she was unable to gulp down. All the chatter around the hospital, the deep breathing and even her own thoughts went deaf to her ears. All she heard was a deep, strong silence. She felt as if she was losing the only family she had left; Lucille who was like a sister to her ever since she was in college, George the brother she never got to know and Kyle, her own son. Her body visibly shook, scaring everyone around her, especially Catherine. But the blonde didn't know what to say, even she was scared.

"What on earth happened?" A voice snapped Sara out from her deep trance of silence. She looked up to see Grissom standing by her side, scared and confused.

"Car accident," Aaron said, as shortly as he said to Sara. "Kyle's in recovery with a concussion and fractured arm, George's in the ICU. Unconscious. And Luce is in surgery."

"George and Lucille, what did the doctors say?" Grissom asked slightly relieved that Kyle was alright. But the fact that his brother and sister-in-law might not recover did not make the scare go away.

"George has massive hemorrhage in his brain," Travis took over when it didn't look as if Aaron could continue. "He might be in a coma, the doctor aren't sure yet. And Lucy is bleeding internally. Doctors don't think she'll make it."

"What?" Grissom looked as if a load of brick had been dropped on his head. "No no, that can't be. They will be able to do something. Yeah, they will be able to." Grissom talked mostly to himself.

Catherine had never seen the man at loss of words or that scared. Sara still hadn't uttered one word but neither did anyone else. Catherine felt out of place and scared but she didn't dare move an inch from where she was standing.

"Excuse me, are you the family of Mr. Grissom?" A timid looking nurse approached the huddled group giving everyone an anxious look. She was slightly taken back when every single person around her nodded to her question. "Well he's awake and the doctor would love to speak to…urm…the family. So if you will please follow me?" The nurse said and turned around. Everyone but Sara, Aaron and Catherine hurried after the nurse. Mia turned around looking at Sara.

"You're not coming?" She asked in a croaky voice.

"I'll wait here in case Lucille's doctor comes out," Sara said in a hopeful voice which broke Catherine's heart. The hope was there yet it was very much clouded by the sadness in her voice.

Mia just nodded and caught up with the rest of the group headed to the ICU. Sara turned towards the Operation Room giving it a hopeful look. It was as if she expected Lucille to come out of there with that cheeky grin on her face and give her a hug. Catherine stepped closer to Sara and took the brunette's hand cautiously. Without taking her eyes off the door, Sara squeezed Catherine's hand. Catherine saw Aaron sit down in one the chairs, moving his legs anxiously as he probably kept telling himself over and over again that his sister was going to be okay. Catherine turned towards Aaron just a bit when the Operation Room doors opened and a weary looking doctor in green scrubs walked out towards them.

"Family of Mrs. Grissom I presume?" The doctor said with a deep intake of air as if he had wanted to do that for a long time now. He looked straight at Sara who stepped forward while Aaron did the same, leaving Catherine one step behind.

"Is she alright?" Aaron asked when Sara didn't say anything.

"I'm sorry, but she didn't make it," The doctor said after what seemed like an eternity of silence. "We did the best we could. I'm really sorry."

"What? No that can't be," Aaron mumbled, more to himself.

"The bleeding was too much and we couldn't stop it in time," The doctor tried to explain, specifically to Sara who hadn't taken her eyes off him. "I'm really sorry for your loss."

The atmosphere filled up with heavy silence. The thing that broke the silence was Aaron dropping to his knees and covering his face. Catherine's heart shattered into several pieces with the intense, heart filled cry that escaped Aaron's lips. The doctor gave the broken man a sad look and turned his eyes to Catherine who knelt down next to Aaron and pulled him into her arms. Sara didn't seem to hear or see any of it. She just kept staring at the doors in front of her.

All of a sudden, Sara rushed inside the Operating Room with the doctor closely behind her, telling her that she couldn't go in there. But she didn't care nor did she stop. She pushed several doors and finally stepped into the room that smelled so much like iron that it made her nauseous. There were some nurses in the room cleaning the place up.

"Ma'am you can't be in here," The nurse stepped forward but something made her step back. Sara turned around to see the doctor looking at her through the two way mirror and give her a nod. The nurses walked out of the room leaving Sara alone in the room. The brunette turned towards the operating table with her heart beating fast. The lump in her throat didn't seem to go away and her insides felt chilled. She stepped closer to the table, the smell of blood increasing with every step she took.

She reached the edged of the table and all she could do was stare at the white sheet covering her friend. Her hands shook as she reached for the sheet, taking her hand back a few times. Finally, she took a deep breath and grabbed the sheet. Pulling it slowly down she exposed the whitened face of Lucille as her own breath refused to escape her lungs. Her hand let go of the sheet and all she could do was stare at her friend's face. Her knees felt weak so she grabbed the metal stool which stood nearby and dropped on it. Sara took Lucille's lifeless hand from underneath the sheet and held it for her dear life. Lucille's body wasn't cold yet but the coldness of the room had made her body freezing cold.

"Hey," Sara looked straight at Lucille's face when she spoke. "Wow you look weird. Remember the times we spent in college making fun of those pale kids and kept saying they must suffering from Reinfield's?" Sara actually paused hoping her friend would answer. "You so look like one of them right now. You'll hate it if you could see yourself." She said softly when her hope of Lucille responding drowned.

"Everyone's waiting for you outside," Sara sighed heavily. "So why don't you get off your lazy ass and come out now?" She squeezed Lucille's hand.

Sara didn't see that the doctor outside the room was now joined by Heather who came into get Sara after hearing the news of Lucille. The dominatrix herself was surprised at the broken down look on Sara's face. She had never expected the CSI to look like that ever in her life; maybe because of all the stories she had heard from Grissom about how strong Sara really was. But at the moment, all Heather saw in Sara's face was emptiness.

"If you're going to keep up this act, George is going to be pissed man," Sara said with a sarcastic chuckle grabbing Heather's attention. "Remember, you told him that you'll allow him to die first so that he wouldn't have to go through the loss of you?"

Heather's heart broke. George was not even stable yet and he had lost half of himself. How they were going to break the news to him, she didn't know. But she knew that it would be hard on everyone, especially Grissom.

"I'm not buying this act, so get up Luce," Sara said a bit loudly shaking Lucille's hand. Both the doctor and Heather headed to the door knowing that Sara was losing the only control she had on herself.

"You can't leave yet. You can't miss out on Kyle's life. You can't just leave George here all alone. You can't leave ME alone." Sara stood up and leaned on the table. She ran her hand over Lucille's hair. "Come on, get up. Just tell me it's a joke please. I'll forgive you I swear."

Heather opened the door without Sara even realizing that someone else had entered the room. But she stopped at the doorway with the doctor a feet or so behind her.

"You said you'll never leave me alone in this wrecked world," Sara grabbed Lucille's shoulders.

"You said that even if Lily's gone, you'll always be here. What happened to that promise? What happened to the promise of never giving up on life? Of always being here for Kyle? Your family?" Sara shook Lucille by the shoulder.

"GET UP!" Sara couldn't hold in the tears she was keeping in her. Her sobs echoed in the room. "Please…"

Sara pulled the lifeless body of Lucille into her arms and hugged her hard, never wanting to let go. She let her tears escape, her sobs increase and her heart bled. She had lost one of the most precious things she had found in life. She never wanted to let go of Lucille, the one person who had always been with her through everything and anything. The person who had never judged her, who had made her feel better even in the most darkest times of her lives and who had given her son everything she probably never could.

"You can't leave," Sara sobbed loudly onto Lucille's shoulders.

At the doorway, Heather stood frozen on her tracks. She had heard people cry, heard people beg yet she had never heard or seen anything like what was in front of her yet. Every bit of emotion that escaped Sara came straight from her heart and it reached her and probably the doctor so painfully that it hurt. Taking in a deep breath, she moved closer to Sara and put a hand on the younger woman's shoulder. But Sara didn't move. She held Lucille and kept crying for her friend to come back to her.

"Sara," Heather said softly trying to make Sara turn around but she failed. "You have to put her down now." She said as caringly as she could.

"No," Sara tightened her grip on Lucille's body. "Go away."

"Please Sara," Heather put in all the strength in her to make Sara turn around. "You have to let her go."

"I don't want to," Sara said angrily at Heather. She held Lucille close while she talked to the woman in front of her. "And she wouldn't want me to either." She rationalized. Her eyes were bloodshot and her eyes filled with tears.

"She would want you to be with your son right now," Heather pointed out. She knew she had to play the Kyle card to bring Sara back to reality from denial.

Sara didn't say anything but buried herself on Lucille's cold neck. Her cries got muffled yet the echoes of her silent cries made the atmosphere so heavy.

"You need to let her go," Heather repeated. She tightened her grip on Sara's shoulders trying to make her point.

Sara didn't say anything but Heather took it as a good sign. She let Sara take her time letting go of Lucille which took longer than she had anticipated. But she didn't mind. She watched Sara hug her friend goodbye and lay her back on the table. Sara bent down and kissed Lucille on the forehead and cupped her cheek.

"You're the greatest best friend one could ever ask for," Sara said sniffing as she spoke. "You don't know how much I appreciate all you have done for me. I'm going to miss you so much. But I promise I'll take care of Kyle and George for you."

Heather took in a deep breath trying not to show anyone her emotions but the color of her face and tears in her eyes were betraying her.

"I love you, will never forget you or anything you have done for me," Sara smiled and placed a peck on Lucille's lips. "Say hi to Lily for me."

With that she gave one look at her friend and turned to Heather. "Kyle's awake?"

"I don't know," Heather answered simply, trying to keep her voice straight.

Sara nodded and headed to the door, offering a simple sorry to the doctor who just nodded. Heather followed her out of the room and into the lobby where everyone stood. Sara leaned on the wall near the door and leaned on it, banging the back of her head on the wall hard enough for everyone to take notice. But she didn't seem to care. Her eyes were closed and her arms were hugging her own body.

Outside the room, Grissom was sitting in one of the chairs, his body hunched forward and his face covered with his hands. Heather sat down next to him and put an arm around him, pulling him into her. The older man just stayed that way without moving, not caring about anything anyone says. Tracy was softly sobbing into Travis's chest while Travis himself was trying to keep himself calm. Mia was however missing from the scene. Aaron was now sitting on the floor leaning on the opposite wall, his face buried in Catherine's chest who was holding him close. Catherine however was holding it together. How she was doing it, even she herself didn't know. But she knew that she needed to be strong for everyone around her at the moment, especially Sara. Her eyes were focused on the brunette who still had her eyes closed. Catherine wanted to get up and give Sara a hug but Aaron had a death grip on her. She couldn't move an inch.

"Kyle's awake," The nurse broke the silence around the group. It seemed as if no one heard her but everyone did. They just didn't know how to respond.

"Can I see him?" Sara asked with her arms still crossed over her stomach and her eyes closed tight.

"Yes, he's asking for his mother," The nurse informed making Aaron and Tracy sob harder, Travis close his eyes and Grissom to groan as if he was in utmost pain.

"I'll be right there," Sara finally opened her eyes and wiped her face. She looked at Catherine and sighed. "You think you're going to be okay here?"

"Yeah I'll handle it here, don't worry," Catherine nodded with a warm smile. "Are you going to be okay?" She asked frankly.

"Let's hope so huh?" Sara sighed again heading to the recovery room to see his son. Her answer didn't help Catherine at all but the blonde knew that it was the best Sara could offer her at the moment.

Filled with questions of her own in her mind, Sara headed to the recovery room. The nurse lead her to Kyle's bed where the little boy was sitting looking grim and angry. He was softly shifting on his spot as if he couldn't wait to leave.

"Hey," He said excitedly, happy to finally see a familiar face.

"Hey sweetie," Sara sat down and brushed his hair carelessly. "How are you feeling?"

"I feel fine," Kyle said with a smile. But before he could say anything else, Sara talked again.

"Can you tell me what happened Kyle?" Sara asked. Maybe it was the CSI in her or because she just really needed to know how they were all dragged into a nightmare. "Please?" She added when she saw the frown on Kyle's face.

"Okay. Well we were going to the mall. Mom was driving, she took her seatbelt off because her chest was hurting," Kyle stared at the wall behind Sara as he spoke. "Dad was trying to convince mom about going to the hospital and he turned around to ask my opinion, the next thing I know is the car was flying and mom screamed."

Kyle looked at Sara who was frowning.

"She was trying to wake up dad, I couldn't move because there was something on my arm," Kyle explained. "Something stabbed mom during the crash but she took it out herself so that she could help dad. But he was still not waking up. I couldn't see anything. And then I didn't hear anything from mom after a while. I passed out after a while of calling for them. I woke up here."

"Okay," Sara said after a minute of processing the information.

"Is dad okay?" Kyle asked, scared of the answer he might get. "He didn't…" He trailed off.

"He's awake now," Sara said softly. She realized that with Lucille, she hadn't taken the time to ask anyone about George. "He's in the ICU."

"He will be okay?" Kyle asked in a worried voice.

"Don't worry sweetie," Sara ran her hand over Kyle's hair. "He's strong. He won't give up while he has you."

"Okay," Kyle nodded and gulped down. "When's mom coming to see me?" Kyle asked. He hadn't even considered the fact that something had happened to Lucille.

"Sweetie…" Sara started but trailed off.

"Did something happen to her?" Kyle asked, his little heart skipping several beats.

"She didn't make it out of surgery," Sara closed up on her son and cupped his face. "I'm so sorry." She tried not to choke up but failed.

"No…" Kyle said softly. He looked down on the bed trying to process the information. "No, that can't be. She was fine, she was better than dad was after the accident. I saw her, I heard her. You must have got it wrong."

"Kyle, I just saw her," Sara took Kyle's hand to feel that he was really cold and shaking at the same time.

"If you just saw her, then she's fine," Kyle tried to make heads and tails of the situation. "She couldn't have… died." It took a lot for him to finish the sentence.

"I just saw her body," Sara said clearly. "She's gone honey."

"You're lying," Kyle looked angry now, even with tears appearing in his eyes. "Mom would never leave me. Stop lying to me." He said harshly. He sounded a lot like Sara while she was trying to get Heather to leave her alone just a few minutes ago.

"Ky…" Sara stuttered but Kyle laid down and turned away from her.

"Go away," He said in the same harsh tone making Sara choke up. The brunette gave a final look at the little boy and got up from the bed.

Sara stopped at her tracks several times on her way but she didn't dare go back to Kyle. She slowly walked her way back to where everyone was and dropped on the floor next to Catherine and Aaron. Grissom and Heather was nowhere to be seen but Sara didn't seem to care. Sara didn't even realize Catherine put her arm around her shoulders and pulled her into her arms. She didn't even notice placing her head on Catherine's shoulder because Sara's mind was stuck in a night 8 or so years ago.

_The wind blew carelessly with the night, coolly caressing Sara's face. She was sitting on the porch softly rubbing her stomach. She was fighting back the nausea hitting her every few minutes cursing under her breath. _

"_Hey how you feeling?" Lucille surprised her from behind. She had her guitar in one hand and notes on the other hand. _

"_Okay I guess," Sara said with a smile. "What you up to?"_

"_I need you to help me out," Lucille handed the guitar to Sara making her sit up. "Play these chords for me, I want to see if this tune works well." _

"_Can't you do it on your own?" Sara whined looking through the papers. "I haven't played in ages."_

"_You played night before last," Lucille raised a cocky eyebrow making Sara giggle like a little girl. "Just don't whine and play."_

"_Okay let me get into this first," Sara started to strum the guitar lazily before trying out Lucille's chords. Her friend watched her get into the rhythm for a while before she cut in. _

"_I think you got it," Lucille frowned making Sara roll her eyes. _

_Sara started to play while Lucille bobbed her head to the tune before starting to sing._

_That smile that fills my grace, _

_The warmth from one embrace,_

_Tingles from the kiss of lust,_

_That one true love I yearn_

_To take his hand and smile, _

_Before it ends all I want is to dance with love today_

_The world might not be grateful tomorrow,_

_Your heart beats today but you're not sure,_

_Just breath and smile, fill up your heart today,_

_What you have today might not be there tomorrow,_

_So open your eyes and dance with me today,_

_No I never wanna let go of what I have right now,_

_Blood that's thicker than it all,_

_Friends closer than my own heart,_

_And my love that's holds all my walls,_

_Want nothing but to dance with my loves today,_

_Just when Lucille was singing the chorus again, George stepped out to the porch and smiled at his newlywed bride. Sara saw the pure love in his eyes making her insides fill with warm as well. Lucille smiled as she sang and turned, wrapping her arms around her husband and swaying to the soft tune. George closed the gap between his wife and him, swaying along with his life to the song. To Sara, he looked mesmerized and extremely content for having Lucille in his arms. He didn't take his eyes off the woman for one second. He just kept staring at her, listening to every word that escaped Lucille's lips. George kissed Lucille avidly when she ended the chorus and Sara kept playing her solo. _

_Even Sara felt the love revolving around her friends as they danced around. Anytime she saw them together, she felt nothing but happy and relieved. She kept playing the chords listening to Lucille. Her voice itself was beautiful and the words were perfect for the time being. When Sara ended the solo, Lucille sang again._

_If I take my last breath today,_

_Promise me my love you won't shed a tear,_

_Those gems are too precious than me,_

_If I had all you next to me,_

_The last breath was none of but peace,_

_This world of uncertainty,_

_Forget it my love and dance with me today,_

_Just come and dance with me today,_

_The world might not be grateful tomorrow,_

_Your heart beats today but you're not sure,_

_Just breath and smile, fill up your heart today,_

_What you have today might not be there tomorrow,_

_So open your eyes and dance with me today,_

_The darkness may overshadows the path,_

_The promises might becomes false and life futile,_

_But life changes its beauty with every breath,_

_That one person comes to you, beautiful than the rest,_

_Grab that hand darling and don't let go,_

_Coz you are never sure of life at all…_

_So let go of yourself and dance with love today._

_George kissed his wife when she stopped singing and took a deep breath. He cupped her face with all the care he had in him. _

"_That was kinda depressing," Sara put the guitar down. _

"_It's not," Lucille tightened George's arms around her waist. "It makes a lot of sense."_

"_It's confusing. What's the song about anyway?" Sara raised an eyebrow. "Dying?"_

_George sat down in the chair next to Sara's and pulled Lucille into his lap making her sit and wrap an arm around his shoulder. _

"_No, it's about appreciating what we have in the moment," Lucille said simply. "Because we don't know whether we will be alive to have it all tomorrow."_

"_How's that not depressing?" Sara asked with a cheeky smile. _

"_You have it today," Lucille shrugged and turned to George, playing with his hair as she spoke. "So we enjoy it all when we have it." _

"_You could have brought it all into the song without making it depressing," Sara pointed out the obvious. _

"_Stop being such a whiner," Lucille chuckled. "It's not the final draft anyway, I just wanted to share it with you guys." _

"_It's not bad," George said playing with Lucille's fingers. "But you know, you are not allowed to talk about dying on me babe."_

"_Baby I made a promise," Lucille smiled. "Even if I'm forced by God himself, I won't break that promise." She kissed George. _

"_Ok very sweet and all but seriously, make it a little less about you dying okay?" Sara said sweetly making the couple pull away from the kiss. _

"_Me dying is such a bad thing?" Lucille joked receiving a slap on her back by George. _

_Before Sara could say anything, she felt uneasiness in her stomach. Sara jumped with her hand on her stomach. "WHOA!" She exclaimed when the little life in her kicked for the first time. _

"_What?" Lucille hurried to her, George close by. "Are you okay?"_

"_I don't think even the baby likes the idea of you dying," Sara grinned and put Lucille's hand on her stomach. "See?"_

"_Oh wow," Lucille's eyes twinkled with excitement. "This is the first time right?" She ran her hand over Sara's stomach following the soft kicks. _

"_Yeah. Wow he's violent," Sara chuckled when George followed Lucille's suit and put his hand on her stomach. _

"_Agrees that his mommy should never go away," George smiled at Lucille who pulled out her tongue. _

"_You guys win," Lucille sighed. "I'm never leaving you guys, promise." She said placing a kiss on Sara's stomach. _

"_Good," Sara and George chorused together and just then Sara felt dizzy making her close her eyes and laid back in the chair._

"_Sar, you okay?" Lucille's voice came from a long distance. "Sar?"_

"Sara," The voice kept calling her making Sara frown. She opened her eyes to see Catherine kneeling in front of her looking scared and worried. "Sar? Are you okay?"

Sara quickly sat up and wiped her face realizing that she had been crying all along. She nodded and tried to give an assuring smile, but failed miserably. Catherine cupped Sara's face and squeezed her cheek giving her a sympathetic look.

"Is Kyle okay?" Catherine asked Sara who sighed heavily.

"He's in denial," Sara sniffed and wiped her face clean again. "He thinks I'm lying. He wanted me to leave him alone."

"Oh I'm so sorry," Catherine said softly. "Kids can be a bit hard at times like this. I'll go talk to him."

"I don't think he'll want that," Sara pointed out.

"I dealt with Lindsey when Eddie died," Catherine stood up. "I'll handle it, don't worry."

"Okay," Sara said softly, not convinced that Catherine could make a difference. She watched the blonde walk out of sight hoping that everything would be alright. Sara turned around to see Mia heading in from outside. The younger woman looked worn out and she had her hands buried deep in her pockets.

"Hey," Mia nodded and sat down on the floor next to Sara who nodded with a smile. "What's going on?"

"Catherine's talking to Kyle, he thinks we're lying," Sara sighed as she summarized everything. "I think Gil went to see George."

"Damn this is so freaking unreal," Mia said in between gritted teeth. "I still don't know whether to think this is real or a very bad nightmare."

"I think it's a little bit of both," Sara ran her hand through her hair. "Though it does seem more of a nightmare than anything else."

"I don't know how I'll ever get used to not having her around anymore," Mia's voice cracked.

"No one will," Sara put an arm around Mia and pulled her into her arms.

"What's going to happen to Kyle?" Mia asked putting her head on Sara's shoulders. "George cannot do it right now. He is in no shape even physically."

"I don't know," Sara said losing her mind for a minute.

While Sara ran scenarios over her head over and over again, Catherine was having a hard time trying to get a mini-Sara to corporate into talking to her.

"Come on Kiddo, turn around," Catherine said for the third time to the little boy who refused to roll over to face her. "Please?"

"No," Kyle said stubbornly.

"I know how you must be feeling," Catherine put an arm on Kyle's shoulder. "But getting angry is not the answer here."

"Sara lied," Kyle turned his head. His face was red and there was a cut on his lips that he kept chewing on.

"She didn't honey," Catherine ran her hand over Kyle's head. "And I know you know that."

"Mommy can't go," Kyle turned around. That was the first time Catherine had heard Kyle call Lucille 'mommy' and the first time he had looked that much like a little boy.

"Honey sometimes people are left with no choice," Catherine laid down next to the boy, pulling him into her arms. Kyle buried his face on Catherine's shoulders breathing heavily. Catherine didn't know whether to feel proud or confused that Kyle was warmer towards her than with Sara.

"She promised," Kyle said stubbornly looking up at Catherine. "I don't believe it. Unless I see her, I won't…"

"Come on then," Catherine got out of the bed pulling softly on the little boy's arm. "We'll go and see your mom."

"…now?" Kyle asked sitting up. He looked hesitant, as if he didn't want his belief to be broken.

"Honey, you need to accept this and if this is how it's going to happen, then be it," Catherine picked up the boy who looked as if she was crazy for doing so. "You are lighter than you look." Catherine expected Kyle to squirm and drop to his feet but to her surprise, the boy just wrapped his arms around her neck and pressed his chin on her shoulders.

"Yeah I'm a huge surprise," Kyle's voice was muffled.

"You sure you want to do this?" Catherine asked softly before she moved. She felt Kyle nod onto her shoulders making her take in a deep breath. She wasn't sure if it was the right thing to do, but a part of her told her that Kyle needed to see in order to believe.

Catherine informed the nurse that she would bring Kyle back soon and headed out of the recovery. When she stepped into the hallway Sara and Mia looked up at her with identical confused looks. Catherine however ignored them for the moment when her eyes caught Lucille's doctor at the reception talking to the nurse. She hurried to the man, explained him the situation getting his permission to walk into the Operating Room. Kyle was silent during the whole conversation and his body language didn't change either. While Catherine talked to the doctor, his eyes were focused on Sara and Mia sitting on the floor looking right at him. He quickly turned his face, resting his cheek on Catherine's shoulders. He didn't like people staring at him.

When Catherine turned around and headed to the OR, Kyle's grip around her neck tightened and she felt his breath increase rapidly.

"Don't worry, I'm right here," Catherine patted on the boy's head and pushed the OR door open, ignoring the shocked looks on Sara and Mia's faces. Sara almost stood up to stop Catherine but Mia stopped her.

The room was still freezing. Kyle felt his hair stand up which made him blame the hospital gown he was forced to wear. He couldn't loosen the grip around Catherine's neck as if holding onto her was the only way to hold onto something he didn't want to let go of. He closed his eyes when he felt Catherine open another door.

"Kyle," Catherine said softly, silently asking him to look up but he refused to lift his head.

Catherine slowly put him down but he still kept his arms wrapped around Catherine and his face pushed against her stomach.

"Come on," Catherine turned the boy around whose eyes focused on nothing but the covered body on the operating table. "I'm right here okay?" Catherine kept her hands on Kyle's shoulders as she slowly pushed him forward forcing him to walk. Even Catherine's heart was beating faster than usual. She really didn't know how to react to seeing Lucille.

Kyle took a deep breath and stepped against the metal table. He didn't have the will power to pull the sheet off. Sensing this, Catherine slowly pulled on the sheet revealing Lucille's face. Even Catherine's breath got stuck in her throat. Her eyes went to Kyle's face. His little face was as pale as Lucille's and his eyes were squinted as if trying to make sure what he was seeing was real.

"Mom?" Kyle asked softly shaking Lucille a bit. Catherine wanted to stop the little boy but she didn't have the heart to do so. Kyle stopped shaking Lucille's lifeless body when he realized that there was no way she was getting up. "She's really gone?" Kyle turned around to face Catherine, showing her his tear filled eyes and quivering lips.

"I'm so sorry honey," Catherine knelt down next to him and pulled him into a hug. Kyle held her close yet he didn't weep. He stared at his mother's lifeless face and let the tears rolled down his face without uttering a single sound.

"I'll miss her," Kyle said in his usual soft voice.

"I know," Catherine tried to keep her emotions in for the boy.

"Bye mom," Kyle smiled at his mother and let go of Catherine, turning towards the door. "Come on let's go. Mom wouldn't want us to cry over her too much."

Kyle took Catherine's hand and helped her stand up. This time, Catherine was lead out by Kyle. He was the stronger person between the duo at the moment and Catherine felt proud and sad. She didn't know whether he was still in denial or doing what he thought his mother would have expected from him. But she knew that suppressing all the feelings in him would not be good, especially for such a little boy. Yet for the moment, she let him do what he wanted.

Both of them walked out of the OR outside where Sara and Mia were leaning on the opposite wall. Sara took a step forward to her son who looked right at her. Without saying any word, Kyle stepped next to Sara and looked at the floor.

"I'm sorry," Kyle said softly with his hands at his back.

"Sweetie its ok," Sara knelt down and pulled her son into her arms. "I'm so sorry." Sara's voice cracked.

"Mom wouldn't want you to cry," Kyle said bravely.

"Well she isn't here to stop me is it?" Sara looked at her son and bit her lips trying to keep her cries in her.

Kyle nodded and hugged Sara tightly. And he couldn't hold it in him. Sara made sure she didn't cry when she heard Kyle weep on her shoulders. The nurses who passed them by, the doctors nearby, Mia, Catherine and even the visitors couldn't help but feel their hearts break as the little boy wept with the loss of his mother.

"Mommy," Kyle bit Sara's shoulder softly as he tried to control himself. Sara just held her son tight, rubbing his back and playing with his hair. She looked up at Catherine who was covering her mouth with tears rolling down her cheeks. Sara tilted her head feeling the most terrible she had in a long time. She took her hand off Kyle's back and held it out for Catherine to take. The blonde knelt down and took Sara's hand and kissed the back of it before squeezing it.

None of them knew for how long they sat like that or for how long Kyle cried. But soon, Kyle dropped to his knees, worn out from everything he was feeling. He pressed the side of his head against Sara's chest, hugging himself and sniffing loudly.

"You need to lay down okay?" Sara wiped the side of Kyle's face that was visible to her. "The nurses will need to check up on you."

"I don't want to be alone," Kyle snuggled into Sara.

"Trust me, I won't go anywhere," Sara kissed Kyle's forehead. "I just need to take care of some things at this end."

"I'll stay with you," Catherine took Kyle's hand at which the boy smiled. He nodded and pulled himself up to drop into Catherine's arms. The blonde held him tight as they stood up along with Sara who helped them both.

Before Catherine could take Kyle back to his bed, Grissom came to them grabbing their attention.

"Sar, George wants to talk to you," He said in a voice that was very unusual to Grissom's.

"Why?" Sara said crossing her arms over her stomach.

"He wouldn't tell me," Grissom sighed just when Heather walked next to him. Sara nodded and kissed Kyle, told him she'd be right back and headed to the ICU. Catherine took Kyle by the shoulder and softly turned him around to head to his bed.

"Cath, can I talk to you?" Grissom stopped her at her tracks. Catherine glared at him and turned to Kyle who turned to Mia.

"It's okay, I'll take him," Mia sighed and smiled at Kyle. "I'll wait with him until you get there."

Catherine nodded and watched both of them disappear around the corner. She looked at Grissom and then at Heather, both of whom looked extremely worn out. Maybe Grissom more than Heather.

"What is it?" Catherine asked stepping a bit closer to the couple.

"I'm going to be here for a while. I told Ecklie that you will be heading the graveyard shift until I can get back," Grissom informed Catherine whose jaws dropped. "He needs you and the rest of the team back by tomorrow's shift. So you guys might have to leave by tonight."

"What? No, no way," Catherine put her hands on her waist. "I can't leave Sara here."

"I know I'm asking you to do something extremely difficult," Grissom said wearily. "But Ecklie cannot arrange anyone else from Days or Swings. And just three people is not going to be enough for the shift, we already have massive backlog."

"I don't care," Catherine stood her ground. "Nick can handle supervision. He has seniority."

"That will leave just three people in the team Catherine," Grissom pointed out. But Catherine retorted back with the same stubborn head shake. "Look I can't leave my brother here right now, and Sara has her friends here. She will be fine."

"I know she will be fine," Catherine snapped. "Doesn't stop me from wanting to stay here."

"Catherine…" Grissom tried to make Catherine see the situation correctly but for once, he was failing at something.

While Grissom talked to Catherine, Sara walked into the ICU room where George was. He was connected to so many machines that Sara didn't even want to count. His head was covered with bandages and his face was covered by the oxygen mask. She saw him move his head to see who was in the room when she entered.

"Hey you," Sara said with utter discomfort. She didn't know how to communicate with a man who had just been told that he had lost everything in his life. "How are you feeling?" As stupid as that question sounded, she needed to ask him that.

"As if I'm in the deepest level of hell," George pulled his oxygen mask down and said with extreme difficulty. He had to stop in the mid of words while he spoke. "I feel like there's something heavy on my chest." He explained slowly.

"I hear you collapsed a lung," Sara sat down on the bed near him making him smile with a nod. "You'll be okay, no worries."

"Doesn't matter now does it?" George said after putting on the mask for a few seconds.

"George…" Sara tilted her head with sympathy.

"She broke her promise to us remember? She promised never to leave us. I'm never going to let her forget that when I see her," George said with a sarcastic chuckle. Sara nodded at which George closed his eyes. "You should take Kyle with you."

"What?" Sara said a bit loudly than she expected. "No George you both need each other."

"I'm in no shape to look after him right now," George spoke as slowly and with as difficulty as he did before. "I don't trust him with anyone but you. Luce would have wanted that." He added softly. With that he started coughing painfully.

"Don't talk now," Sara rubbed George's thigh. "We can discuss this later."

"No," George said in between coughs. "Take Kyle with you. He needs a mother."

"He needs you too," Sara pointed out.

"I am going to be stuck here for a long time Sar," George said with a sad smile. "Even out, they don't think I can use my legs anymore." Sara took in a sharp intake of breath. She didn't know that fact. "Take him with you. He can have a life with his actual mother. It will be good for both of you."

"I can't uproot him from here," Sara shook her head.

"Please…" George played his last card. "Do it for Lucille."

Sara looked at George pleadingly to stop talking. But he looked quite determined in what he was trying to get Sara to do. Sure Sara wanted to have Kyle in her life more but she didn't want it like this. And she was not in a living situation where she could have a kid around. Financially she could afford it but she didn't know what Kyle would think of it either. It was not an easy decision and she was torn. But the look on George's face was hard to ignore. He looked lost and as if he didn't have anything to live for. Maybe Kyle will be better with her for the time being.

"What about you?" Sara asked after taking a long time to think. "I can't take away his father from him."

"I'll come visit," George smiled with a revealing sigh when he saw that Sara was considering it. "Or you guys could come here sometime."

"We'll have to talk to Kyle first," Sara sighed giving up to George. "If he is okay with it, I'll take him."

"Thank you," George took Sara's hand and tried to squeeze it but he had no strength.

"I'm really sorry about all this George," Sara said after letting a few seconds of silence fill the room. "I wish this was a nightmare from which we all can wake up from."

"You and me both," George closed his eyes again. "I don't know what to do anymore. I can't imagine living without her Sar."

Sara sat in silence holding George's hand while he poured his heart out.

"You plan a life with someone, share every moment with each other and then that person is taken away from you just like that," George talked in difficulty. A tear rolled down the side of his face. "It's not fair that she was taken and I'm left to live here. He could have just taken me. She makes the world a better place by just existing."

Sara still didn't know what to say. She had no idea how to make someone so broken feel even a little bit alive.

"I love every inch of her, everything about her," George started taking short difficult breaths. "Her smile, her hair, that little scar underneath her breast that she hated, her anger, her laugh and even her not so good cooking. How am I supposed to live without her? HOW!" He screamed loudly at the ceiling as if asking a higher power for answers. "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU EXPECT ME TO DO NOW? TELL ME!" The words came out slowly and with a lot of work, yet with so much anger and hurt that it pierced through Sara.

Before George could say anything else he started coughing. His chest heaved up since he was unable to breath. All the machines started beeping making Sara jump up and cup George's face.

"Hey, hey George come on," Sara shook him with desperation.

Just then a lot of nurses and probably a few doctors walked into the room and rushed Sara out of the ICU. The door closed behind them while she stood outside, grabbing her hair and biting her lips trying not to scream with anger. She didn't know how long she stood like that outside the door but she stood until a nurse walked out of the door looking extremely worried.

"What happened to him?" Sara cornered the girl against the wall. "Is he okay?"

"He's stable for now," The nurse said in a shaky voice. "He's going to be put in a sleep for now."

"For how long?" Sara asked remembering Lucille's service, that she was yet to arrange. She couldn't believe that the thought only came to her mind just now.

"Until he's stable enough," The nurse said before hurrying back to her station.

Sara took a peek into the room where the doctor was checking George's vital and some of the nurses were walking out. George's face was half covered by the oxygen mask yet he looked as if he was in peace for the moment. She took one longing look at the man, hoping to open his eyes and give her his famous wink before turning around to go back to her son.

Sara's mind was filled with questions, disturbing thoughts along with the thought of arranging her best friend's funeral as she walked down the hallways back in front of the OR. She heard a slight commotion as she neared the spot she left in silence. She looked up to see a very angry Catherine waving her arms at a disappointed looking Grissom.

"…I'm leaving her alone here Grissom," Catherine's words became clear as Sara stepped next to the two arguing CSIs.

"Catherine, you need to listen to me," Grissom rubbed his temples.

"No, you listen to me Grissom," Catherine started but Sara decided to butt in.

"What's going on?" Sara asked grabbing both their attention. She saw Heather leaning on the wall looking helpless.

"He wants me to go to Vegas because Ecklie can't find a supervisor for the graveyard shift," Catherine summarized the problem to Sara. "I am not leaving you alone here."

"It's okay Cath," Sara said to Catherine who raised an eyebrow angrily. "I don't mind. You should go."

"You're kidding me right?" Catherine said in a disbelieving tone.

"No, you can't stay here for that long anyway," Sara said warmly trying to get Catherine to see sense in the situation. "Don't get me wrong, I want you here I do, more than a lot of things. But you have Lindsey to take care of. You have a job you should be loyal to."

"And I have you to take care of and be loyal to as well," Catherine pointed out stubbornly.

"I know," Sara managed a smile at the care she felt from Catherine. "But I have all these people here right now. And I have Kyle too. I'm sure they can't make up for you but I will be pretty worked up these days."

"That's why I want to be here with you," Catherine said wearily. Even she was getting tired of the argument. "Please."

"I won't be long," Sara pointed out. "But for now I don't think we have a choice." Sara stepped forward and took Catherine's hand. "And it's not like you can't be with me even if we are in different places. I'll talk to you all the time and you can take care of me whenever and however you want."

"But…" Catherine felt her losing the battle.

"You Cath are the most responsible woman I know, and you know that without Gil the team is going to need you," Sara ran her hand over Catherine's cheek. "When I take care of everything on this side, I'll be with you in the same place again. I promise."

"I don't want to leave you alone at this time," Catherine said softly taking Sara's free hand.

"You won't be," Sara smiled. "I will know that you're always with me, whether you are next to me or not."

"You're not going to let go of this are you?" Catherine took a deep breath.

"What do you think?" Sara said placing a peck on Catherine's lips.

"I don't like that," Catherine frowned. "But I'll take it for now."

"Thank you," Sara said appreciatively. "Now since you seem to click with Kyle really well, do you want to come with me to ask him if he wants to move to Vegas?"

"What do you mean?" Catherine asked along with Grissom who asked the same question.

Sara filled them in about what George asked from her. According to both Grissom and Catherine, what George proposed was the right thing to do. They spent a few minutes talking about how Kyle's schooling can be changed and how Sara could arrange her living situation to accommodate her son.

"Urm excuse me, Ms…" Someone said from Sara's back grabbing her attention. She turned around to see Lucille's doctor standing behind her with a chart in his hand.

"Sidle, Sara Sidle," Sara said calmly. "What is it doctor?"

"I just wanted to inform you that Mrs. Grissom's autopsy will be done tonight," The doctor explained. "So the body will be ready for transfer by morning."

"Okay, thanks," Sara gulped down. She didn't like the idea of an autopsy on Lucille but she knew that under the circumstances, there was no way around it.

The doctor nodded and left them alone again. Sara then remembered about George and informed Grissom making him hurry to the ICU again with Heather following him closely. She saw Catherine lean on the wall and wipe her face wearily.

"This has been one hell of an emotional rollercoaster huh?" Sara said leaning on the wall next to Catherine.

"You can say that again," Catherine nodded and put her hands in her pants pocket. "I still can't believe this."

"I don't know what to feel right now," Sara sighed making Catherine look to her. "I am so sad that she's gone but right now with Kyle and George and even her service, I'm so emotionally worn out. I don't even know how to grieve over my own best friend."

"Don't you feel sad that you are never going to be able to talk to her again?" Catherine asked slightly shocking Sara. "She is never going to come back. You will never be able to hear her laugh or feel her hug you or touch you. She's left you forever Sar."

"Why are you saying all that?" Sara frowned gulping down a lump in her throat. "Stop saying that."

"I'm just telling you the truth," Catherine shrugged. "You are never going to get Lucille back again. If you feel sad or want to talk to her, you are just going to have to talk to a wall and imagine her being there. But she will never come in front of you and make you feel better the way she used to. It will never be the same."

"Stop," Sara squinted her eyes at her girlfriend. Her insides felt as if they were getting tied into a tight knot. "Really Cath, stop." She felt her sadness reach the peak.

"Your son lost his mother today, he is probably never going to feel the same way again," Catherine said a bit seriously. "He is so little and he has to go through something so devastating. Your own son has to go through the loss of a parent. Did you ever want your child to feel that?"

"No," Sara covered her face. The anger in her surfaced, the sadness refused to stay in and a soft yet powerful scream escaped her lips. "God, this can't be happening." Sara hunched over, covering her face and let the tears fall. She felt Catherine wrap her arms around her shoulders and pull her into a close embrace.

"I'm sorry," Catherine kissed Sara's ears softly. "But you need to let it out."

Sara's knees felt week and before she knew it, she dropped to her knees along with Catherine herself who was still holding onto her. She laid herself on Catherine's chest and cried. And she couldn't stop. She felt Catherine's grip on her shoulders holding her tight and her other hand caressing her hair.

"I'm here for you," Catherine said, her lips pressed against Sara's forehead. "I'll always be here for you."

And all Catherine could do for Sara at the moment was to hold her close and listen to the powerful cries that escaped from her girlfriend.

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**Thanks for reading...lemme know what you think...good or bad, im pretty sure i can handle it :)**


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

**This one's a bit shorter than the others but hopefully you guys will like it. Sorry for the late update but exams kept me busy. Since it's holidays, hopefully updates will be a bit more frequent. Thanks for the really awesome reviews, they were very motivating...thanks again.**

**To my muse, yes that's you snowwhite ;)**

**Disclaimer: See chapter 1...REVIEW and ENJOY pls...**

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Sara stepped out of the bathroom not surprised with the fact that the very long shower she just took didn't help clear her mind at all. She felt as if the whole world was on her shoulders and the headache she was having wasn't helping the situation at all. She threw the towel on the chair nearby and laid down on the bed grabbing the pillow next to her. She closed her eyes tightly and took in a deep breath realizing just how much her life was going to change now. Her mind wandered to the conversation she and Catherine had with Kyle back at the hospital that changed the path her life was on.

_Kyle was laying on his bed with his eyes closed and hugging himself when the two women walked in. His eyes darted open when he realized that he had visitors and sat up when he saw Sara and Catherine. He wiped his face which was reddened and his eyes were puffy. Sara sat down on one side of the bed while Catherine sat on the other making Kyle very curious. _

"_What is it?" He asked knowing something was going to happen. _

"_How are you feeling?" Sara asked ignoring Kyle's question._

"_Like someone just told me that my mom is dead," Kyle said frankly making Sara flinch and Catherine scrunch her face. This boy was really going to grow up to be a second Sara. "What's going on?"_

"_Okay, well I have something to ask you," Sara took a deep breath and took one of Kyle's hands. "You know your dad is in the ICU right?" Kyle nodded looking straight at Sara. "Well he thinks, since he is going to be sick for a while, that you should come and live with me in Vegas."_

_Kyle squinted his eyes in thought and looked down at his hand that was entwined with Sara's. He scratched the back of his head with his free hand before looking up to face Sara again. _

"_For how long?" He asked softly. _

"_Urm, he wants you to move to Vegas with me," Sara said trying to clear her point to the boy. "All together." She added with a gulp. _

"_Why?" He asked slightly hurt. "He doesn't want me anymore?"_

"_No, no sweetie that's not it," Sara tightened her grip on Kyle's hand. "He just doesn't think that he will be able to take care of you the way he used to all alone. And the doctors don't think that he will be able to walk anymore. So he just doesn't want your life to be hard by being around him without mom."_

"_He won't be able to walk anymore?" Kyle's eyes grew wide with shock. Sara nodded biting her lips nervously. "But then who will take care of him if I leave? If I'm here at least I can look after him."_

"_He wouldn't want that honey," Catherine said rubbing his back. "He would want you to focus on your studies and have a normal childhood. If not he will blame himself for the rest of his life."_

"_It won't ruin anything," Kyle pushed stubbornly. "He's my dad, I want to look after him."_

"_I know you do but right now maybe it will be best to do as he wants," Catherine pointed out. Sara saw Kyle drop his head knowing he really didn't have a choice. "You have the rest of your life to take care of him. But right now, you know that your studies are important."_

"_Plus Trav and the guys will take care of your dad as good as any," Sara chipped in making the point stronger. "And you can visit him anytime you want."_

"_He wouldn't let me do anything else would he?" Kyle finally looked up, but not at Sara but Catherine. Catherine shook her head with a sympathetic smile. "What about my school?" He asked turning to Sara. _

"_I'll talk to your school and settle the transfer process," Sara said quickly. She noted to herself that she had a lot more to do than she expected. _

"_I'll be living with you?" Kyle asked. _

"_Yeah, for now at my apartment," Sara sighed. "But I'll find a better place when we get back to Vegas."_

_Kyle started to bite his nails while staring straight at the wall in front of him. Sara and Catherine knew that his mind was working on overtime trying to find a way to get out of it. But they also knew that the boy loved George enough to do anything the man asked from him. Finally, Kyle took a deep breath and wiped his face. _

"_Okay," Kyle nodded. "But we leave after the service. And after dad gets released from the hospital."_

"_I promise about the service part," Sara patted on the boy's hand. "And I will try to work out the other part."_

"_Thanks," Kyle nodded just when the nurse came over. _

"_He can go home now," The nurse said a bit cheerfully. "Can one of you come with me to take care of the papers please?" She asked before turning around to head back to the station. _

"_I'll be right back," Sara placed a kiss on top of Kyle's head before following the nurse. _

"_Don't worry, it will all work out okay," Sara heard Catherine say to Kyle. A smile appeared on her lips when she realized she had a wonderful woman by her side to help her through a really hard time. _

Just then, there was a soft knock and the bedroom door open with a squeak. Sara sat up to see Mia standing at the door looking like complete hell. She really was having a hard time dealing with all of it. Maybe because in her whole life, this was the first time she had lost someone so important to death, to never return.

"Want to get pizza?" She asked softly. "I figured we have to eat something to make sure we get everything done."

"Sure," Sara nodded and sat up, grabbing her t-shirt from the bed. "Where's Cath?" She asked quickly putting the piece of clothing over her head.

"She's with Kyle," Mia grabbed the back of her neck twisting it in pain. "He's finally falling asleep."

"Okay, you order the pizza," Sara stretched her body stifling a yawn. Mia nodded and stepped out leaving Sara in the dark room.

Sara took another deep breath realizing that she really wasn't in the mood to eat. But she also knew that her body felt weak and if she needed to be at least near to the top of her game, she needed some strength. Sara closed the door behind her and stepped into the hallway. As she passed Mia's room she stopped to see Catherine sitting on the bed leaning on the headboard, her legs stretched out with Kyle snuggled into her side. Catherine had a book in her hand and she was squinting while she read the book out loud to the boy holding her close. Sara's eyes went to the boy's face which was half buried in Catherine's side. He was trying very hard to keep his eyes open but he was having a very hard time doing so. Catherine's free hand was running through Kyle's hair which was clearly making the boy slowly fall asleep. Sara could understand why he felt calm. Catherine's voice felt soothing even to her and the way the woman was holding the boy close, Sara knew Kyle felt secure. The brunette smiled slightly when she saw that Kyle had his thumb in his mouth, with his index finger over his nose. She had forgotten that Kyle tend to do that when he's nervous and thinks in bed. He was sucking on his thumb softly, listening intently to Catherine and finally falling asleep. He really was tired.

Catherine turned to Sara and smiled seeing the brunette watching them. Sara raised her eyebrow saying 'hi' at which she nodded and went back to reading the book. She saw Sara get out of the room and back into the living room. Without her glasses, it was really hard to read the book especially due to the small font but that was the book Kyle chose and she didn't want to argue. She could understand how the boy was Sara's son. Normal 7 year old kids read books like the Hardy Boys or the Famous Five but Kyle is into Sherlock Holmes. It was amusing and Catherine liked it. She looked down at the boy who finally had his eyes closed while sucking his thumb, drifting off to sleep. But Catherine didn't move or stop reading because she knew that it would take a while until the boy was fully asleep. She stayed in bed for about another 15 minutes before she decided that Kyle was finally asleep. She put the book on the nightstand, placed a kiss on the boy's forehead, put a pillow for him to hug after she got off the bed and walked out of the room into the living room.

Sara was sitting in the couch with Mia, both staring into blank space. Catherine sat down next to Sara giving her a soft smile and leaned back on the couch. They were the only people in the house besides Kyle. Travis was at the hospital with Grissom. Heather went back to the hotel to get some sleep and Tracy went to her girlfriend's place to probably feel at least something. Sara put an arm around Catherine and pulled the blonde into her arms. Catherine leaned her head on Sara's shoulders while Mia laid back on the couch and covered her face with her palms.

"When are we holding the service?" Mia asked in a very soft voice. It was new to everyone to see Mia talk that softly since normally she was quite loud.

"Soon but we need George there so it has to be when he's stable," Sara said after giving it some thought. "I'll talk to the doctor tomorrow and we'll set a date."

"I have some friends at the best funeral home around here," Mia kept talking. "And I'll settle the flower arrangements with Maria too. She called me today and said she will help us out."

"She's still in business huh?" Sara bit her lip remembering an old friend and a motherly figure she had lost contact with since she left San Francisco. "That's good. I'll take care of everything else."

"Okay," Mia nodded without showing either woman her face. "We're using her song right?" She asked after a few seconds of silence.

"Yeah, I have the original recording of that song," Sara nodded pushing her chin on top of Catherine's head. "But it's in Vegas so maybe you can send it to me when you get there?" She asked Catherine who nodded onto her shoulder. "When are the guy's coming to pick you up?"

"They didn't say a time," Catherine scrunched her face. She really didn't like the idea of leaving Sara and Kyle alone. "They'll call when they get here."

"Okay," Sara said with a sigh just when the doorbell rang.

Mia jumped off the couch grabbing the money on the table. While she paid for the pizza, Sara kept holding Catherine for her dear life. She was realizing with every passing minute that she really didn't want Catherine to leave. She had thought that since it was the right thing to do, she could deal with it. But right now she could see that Catherine was the thing keeping her in one piece and to what she saw, Catherine was also the thing keeping Kyle sane. Maybe the boy saw Lucille in Catherine or she just has a way with kids, but the boy was more connected to Catherine than to Sara at the moment. And Sara didn't blame him. Catherine was like that. She knew just what to say, just what to do to make someone feel safe and above all, she was a great mother. The boy's attachment to Catherine made Sara felt better than sad. Sure she wanted to be closer to Kyle herself, but at the moment her mind was all over the place. And she doubted whether right now was the best moment to have a whole mother-son bonding moment. Then she realized that she had a whole lifetime to have so many moments like that with her son. And to her surprise, she wasn't scared of it; but she was looking forward to it and she was excited about it.

Mia put the pizza down on the table and sat down in the chair nearby grabbing a slice. Sara looked at the woman who took a bite and scrunched her face in what looked like disgust.

"It's bad?" Sara asked grabbing a slice for Catherine and for herself.

"No, I just don't feel like eating," Mia gulped down the mouthful and sighed. "But I don't have a choice do I?"

"I guess not," Sara said softly before taking a bite herself. Then she realized what Mia meant. She really wasn't in the mood to eat either and from the looks of it, neither was Catherine.

The three women ate in silence and not to their surprise, all they could eat was about one and half slices each. The pizza box sat on the table with three women sitting around it in complete silence, all lost in their own thoughts. It was obvious that all their thoughts were filled with those of Lucille and the situation they were in. If it was a good thing or not, they couldn't figure it out. But none of them cared. The silence was broken when Catherine's cell phone rang. All six eyes turned to the phone on the table. None of them seemed to have the strength to move but the noise was annoying all of them. Cursing softly under her breath, Catherine grabbed the phone and answered in an annoyed voice.

"Catherine," The blonde said shortly. "Okay, apartment 5, 7th floor. Come up." With that, she shut the phone and groaned. "I don't want to go." She finally said turning to Sara.

"I don't want you to go either," Sara admitted making Catherine's face lighten up a bit. "But you know you have to go."

"I don't have to," Catherine started but Sara shook her head making the blonde not push the conversation forward. "I'll go and finish packing." She placed a peck on Sara's lips and headed to the room.

The doorbell rang making Mia groan angrily. Sara apologized to her friend who laid on the couch as soon as she got up. The brunette hurried to the door and opened the door to her team, all of whom looked confused and slightly scared.

"Hey guys, come on in," Sara said opening the door for them. Three of them walked in and stayed at the doorway while Sara closed the door and headed into the living room. "Urm…you can come and sit down you know." She said softly when she saw the three men frozen at the doorway.

Slowly, all of them sat down in the free couch after taking a glance at Mia's back that was visible since the woman was laying snuggled into the couch facing away from them. Sara sat down on the coffee table and looked at the three men who looked really uncomfortable and in complete silence.

"Cath will be right out," She informed the guys who nodded.

"Urm…how are you doing?" Nick finally asked after exchanging worried glances with the two other men.

"I've been better," Sara clapped her hands together and hunched forward in her seat.

"We're really sorry about Lucille Sar," Greg said softly making Sara smile a bit.

"It's okay, thanks Greg," Sara nodded.

"Are you sure you're going to be okay here?" Nick asked quickly. "You know we can work something out and stay and help you out."

"I'll be alright Nicky," Sara tried to sound assuring. She didn't know if she was doing a good job. "I have these guys here. And I know if I need anything I can always call you guys."

"You better not forget that," Nick said sternly, being his elder brotherly self. Sara nodded with a thankful smile.

"How's Grissom holding up?" Warrick asked curiously.

"He's not okay but he's dealing with it," Sara said scrunching his face. "A lot better than expected actually." She added trying to make them less concerned.

Catherine walked into the living room with her bag just at that moment. The three men stood up, Warrick checking his watch.

"We should get going or else we're going to miss the flight," He said with a sigh.

"Okay," Catherine said in a sad tone.

The three men headed to the door, Nick grabbing Catherine's bags. Sara walked up to Catherine and took the blonde's hand and smiled. Not letting go of Sara's hand, Catherine stepped to the doorway with the rest of the team who opened the door to leave.

"I'll miss you," Catherine said looking into Sara's eyes.

"And I'll miss you a lot too," Sara squeezed Catherine's hands. "Call me when you get there?"

"I will," Catherine nodded. "And you call me if you need anything, at any time. Promise?"

"Yeah," Sara smiled. And forgetting the fact that the rest of the team was watching them, Sara pulled Catherine into her arms and kissed her. Catherine cupped Sara's face and deepened the kiss losing herself in the moment. Sara's arms wrapped around Catherine's waist and pulled her closer, closing the gap between them. It felt right to have Catherine in her arms; so right that she didn't want to let go. But soon enough, oxygen became a necessity and their lips parted. Catherine ran her hand down Sara's cheek and placed another peck before she stepped back.

"Take care of yourself and Kyle okay?" She said to Sara who nodded. "Call me please?"

"I will," Sara smiled and gave Catherine a hug before letting the blonde turn.

When both women's eyes met their team, they realized what had just happened. Greg had a subtle cheeky grin while Warrick and Nick had their jaws dropped down to the ground. Sara scratched her head uneasily and exchanged a worried look with Catherine who wore the same confused look as Sara.

"What was that about?" Warrick asked in a shocked voice.

"I had to kiss my girlfriend goodbye before I left," Catherine shrugged. "That's allowed right?"

"Girlfriend?" Nick and Greg said together making Sara smile a bit. It felt good to smile about something and it felt better to smile about Catherine.

"You guys are dating?" Warrick asked still in the same shocked voice. "No wait, you guys are into women?"

"Sounds about right," Catherine nodded and checked her watch. "We really should get going or we'll be late." She turned to Sara and gave her one big kiss. "Give a kiss to Kyle from me okay?" Sara nodded and watched Catherine walk out of the door, give her a slight wave and close the door behind her.

Sara turned to the living room to see Mia sleeping on the couch, hugging herself probably feeling really cold. She quickly went to her bedroom, grabbed the blanket and a pillow, brought it to the living room, put the pillow under her head and covered her with a blanket. She ran a hand over Mia's forehead before turning around to head to her room. But at Mia's room's doorway stood the mini version of her who made her stop at her tracks.

"What's wrong sweetie?" Sara knelt in front of Kyle who rubbed his eyes.

"Did Catherine leave already?" He asked in a sleepy voice.

"She just left," Sara said softly. "What woke you up?"

"I heard voices outside," Kyle said looking into Sara's eyes. "And I didn't want to be alone in the room."

"Come on, I'll stay with you," Sara stood up and put an arm around her son.

"You won't leave when I sleep?" Kyle asked getting into bed.

"I won't. Promise," Sara placed a kiss on Kyle's forehead and let him snuggle into her. Kyle closed his eyes and put his thumb back into his mouth while Sara held her son close and closed her own eyes. She doubted if she could get any sleep and even if she got any, she probably wouldn't feel any rested. But she decided to give it a shot anyway.

While Sara drifted off into a troubled sleep, Catherine boarded the plan to head back to Vegas. The guys were kind enough to leave her alone without asking her much question about her and Sara but that might be because of her worn out appearance. Nick was driving the car back home so he had said goodbye at the airport and Warrick and Greg let her stay lost in her thoughts in the plane. Her thoughts were filled with that of Sara; the warmth she felt when she was around the brunette, the security she gets around her, the intense emotions Sara carries in her. She felt bad leaving Sara when she didn't want to. She wanted to be there next to her, trying to make her feel better, holding her in her arms and being with her every single minute. Catherine was surprised at how deep her feelings were becoming towards Sara and in such a short time. She didn't know whether it was the rebound thing talking or whether it's the circumstances they were in at the moment. But she couldn't think of anyone but Sara at the moment. And to her, it was a bit too fast and it was slightly scaring her. Thankfully, the flight wasn't that long and soon, she was taking a cab home. She called her sister on the way telling her that she'll pick up Lindsey from school the next day after shift.

The cab ride home was too long according to Catherine. She felt exhausted and as if she had no energy in her whatsoever. Deciding that she really needed some sleep or at least some rest, she walked into her house, put her coat on the hanger, left her bag near it and went into the kitchen to get some water. She grabbed the bottle and headed to the living room to crash on the couch. But to her glee, there was a surprise waiting for her.

"Hey baby," The voice overwhelmed every sense of her. The water bottle in her hand dropped to the floor when her knees felt as if they would give away at any minute.

"Alan," Catherine's voice became croaky as if her voice was stuck in her throat. She opened her mouth to talk, to scream at him to get out but no words came out. Her body betrayed her.

Alan stood in front of her, giving her a sheepish smile. He looked the same, though with an unshaven beard and messy clothes. He still had that same charming look, the twinkle in his eyes and the permanent crooked smile on his lips. Catherine's body was frozen that she couldn't move away when he stepped inches from her.

"How have you been?" He asked cautiously.

Catherine couldn't believe the audacity in him for asking her that. He put his hand on her arm which made her flinch. And she regained control of her body again. She stepped away from him. She glared at him angrily when he tried to step closer. She held a hand telling him to stay away.

"What the hell are you doing here?" She spat angrily. "How did you get in here?"

"I still have my key. And I just want to explain what happened," Alan said stopping at his tracks. He wanted to talk to Catherine, not make her angry or scared.

"I don't want to hear it," Catherine lied. At the moment all she wanted was to get him out of her sigh. "I want you to leave. Now!"

"Listen to me Bear," Alan said stepping forward and reaching out to touch Catherine but the blonde slapped his hand away.

"Do not call me that," She pointed a finger at Alan. "And I said, get out of my house. NOW!"

"Okay, okay calm down," Alan stepped back towards the front door. "We'll talk when you are ready."

"Get out," Catherine repeated herself. The man gave her a hurt look which she ignored. He had no reason to give her such a look when he had made her go through hell. So she just glared at him with no sympathy whatsoever.

"I missed you Bear," He gave her one longing look before walking out of the door. He left the door open making Catherine even more annoyed.

She stepped to the door and looked out to see him turn his head with a smile. Feeling even angrier than before, she slammed the door on his face and banged on the door at the same time.

"ARGH!" She screamed loudly into the evening and went into the living room dropping on the couch. She closed her eyes and her mind filled with images of Sara making her snap her eyes open. She had promised Sara that she would call her when she got there. But something was telling her that Sara would be trying to get some rest which meant she shouldn't disturb her. Deciding to be smart, she sent a short text telling Sara that she got home safely and threw the phone on the armchair nearby.

Catherine grabbed the cushion and hugged it to dear life, closing her eyes again. She cursed her luck for what was happening. She was slowly moving on from Alan with a person as wonderful as Sara. And now, just when her feelings towards Sara start to grow, Alan comes back out of nowhere. She groaned into the pillow, biting on it trying to keep her anger in. All she could ask was question after question; why couldn't things ever be easier for her? Why does she always end up in dilemmas like this? Why can't for once in her life, fate be kind to her? No answer came to her. But she knew that she would have to deal with this before she ends up hurting anyone, especially Sara.

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**Thanks for reading...lemme know what you thought, won't take too long :) **


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

**Sorry for taking so long in updating, lots of stuff kept me from doing so, along with a pain of a writer's block. But now that it's gone, here you go. I made it long hoping that would make up for the very late update. Thanks for the lovely reviews, it was awesome to see it all. So thank you. **

**This chapter is for two people; one, my muse as usual whom i really miss and really hope you'll feel better. Two, a very wonderful friend Joy; for making me see a whole another perspective of life and giving me a lot of hope, so here's to hoping you'll feel better soon.  
**

**Disclaimer: See chapter 1...ENJOY :)**

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Sara tried to roll in her sleep but something stopped her from doing so. She squinted her eyes open to see Kyle stuck to her side holding her close. Her hands involuntarily ran over Kyle's head stroking his hair. He scrunched his face and buried his nose more into her side. Sara chuckled and turned her head to the other side grabbing her phone. She saw that it was 7 in the morning making her groan knowing that she had to get out of bed to get a lot of things done. She stretched her back loudly in the bed before slowly pushing Kyle onto his side of the bed and sitting up. She felt all her muscles tense up making her feel just how sore she was. She hadn't gotten much sleep since half of the night, she was twitching between sleep and being awake.

While Sara sat and gathered the will power to get up, Kyle opened his eyes with extreme difficulty. His eyes stung and his vision was blurry. He rubbed his eyes and wiped his face before sitting up. He looked to his side to see Sara's sitting with her back to him. He felt an overwhelming rush of emotions in him realizing that he hadn't lost all of it just yet. He had lost one mother but he had another, not the same but he still had one. The thought of Lucille made his breath stuck in his throat. His head started to hurt again and felt dizzy. He saw that it was still not that light outside so deciding that he could get some more sleep, even if it's filled with nightmares, he laid down on before Sara realized he was up and closed his eyes.

After sitting on the bed for about 5 minutes, Sara headed into the bathroom. She didn't know how long she stood under the cold water. Maybe she was wishing that the water would wash away the stress and the weight of the world off of her shoulder. But when her body started to shake due to the cold, she realized that it wasn't going to work. She wrapped the towel around her body and stepped into the room to see Kyle sleeping peacefully, his mouth slightly open and hugging the pillow to death. With a chuckle, she stepped out of the room to her room grabbing a fresh pair of clothes. Her eyes darted to the bed, memories of Catherine hitting her with a rush. Just then she remembered seeing a text in the middle of the night while she was half asleep. Throwing the t-shirt over her head quickly, she hurried into Mia's bedroom grabbing her cell phone and out so that she wouldn't wake up Kyle.

'_I just got home. Going to try and get some sleep before work. Call me if you need me? xo Cath,' _ Sara smiled as she read through the text.

Sara walked into the living room staring at her phone and lifted her head when she heard a soft snore coming from the room. Mia was on the couch, laying on her stomach with one leg and one hand dangling off the couch. Sara smiled and grabbed the laptop that sat on the coffee table and went into the kitchen. She needed to settle Kyle's transfer to Vegas and that meant a lot of research. She made a cup of coffee for her and sat down, browsing through to find a place that was up to her standards. It was going to be a long morning.

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It was almost noon. The coffee cup sat empty next to the laptop, the room lit up with natural light and Sara with her head resting on the table, softly snoozing into the day.

_The evening was warm, warmer than usual. The smell of strawberries was overwhelming but it wasn't new. She must have just taken a shower. Sara squinted one eye open from her spot on the couch to see Lily walk into the living room in her white t-shirt and pajama pants. Sara sat up, crouched her legs towards her making space for the smaller woman to sit down. Her eyes didn't leave Lily, as if studying her every movement. _

"_Why are you staring at me?" Lily asked with a smile. _

"_You look like you have no worry in the world," Sara hugged her knees, resting her chin on them. "Why?"_

"_Should I have a lot of worries?" Lily shrugged putting the blanket over her legs. _

"_I don't know," Sara scrunched her face. "Aren't you scared?"_

"_Of the cancer?" Lily laughed heartily making Sara roll her eyes. _

"_Yeah, I mean even I am," Sara admitted timidly which made Lily tilt her head in both awe and sympathy. She slouched forward and took one of Sara's hands into hers. _

"_Why are you scared?" Lily asked softly, probably feeling bad for making Sara go through that much emotions. _

"_I'm scared that you are going to…you know…you would..I mean…" Sara stuttered, pouting her lips the way she always does when she's trying to think of something clever. _

"_Die?" Lily stated what Sara couldn't say. She felt Sara slightly flinch and give her a stern look. "You can glare at me all you want, but that's what would happen."_

_Sara sighed heavily and covered her face between her legs for a while. It was true yet she didn't want it rubbed on her face. She liked living in denial; that everything was going to be alright. And the fact that it was Lily who was saying that to her didn't make it any easier. _

"_Hey look at me," Lily's voice made Sara lift her head up again, placing her chin back on her knees. "I am scared, I admit. But mostly of not of dying." _

_Sara raised an eyebrow, very interested in what her girlfriend was trying to tell her. _

"_I'm scared of leaving you behind," Lily shrugged sweetly which made Sara's inside's melt. It wasn't the words, but her eyes. The sincerity, the truth and the clarity in the beautiful eyes made Sara feel like her heart was going to come out of her throat. _

"_Before I met you, I never cared that I'm not going to live that long," Lily took in a deep breath. "Ever since I was diagnosed, I made my peace with it. But I promised myself that I wouldn't let it stop me from having any fun I could have."_

_Sara smiled remembering the first time she had met Lily. No one would have guessed that the woman was terminally ill. Sure, she would sit down after roaming around for a while but as soon as her breath caught up, she got up again. _

"_I also told myself that I wouldn't fall in love again because that would mean breaking someone's heart," Lily gulped not looking at Sara. "But argh I met you. I don't even know how you made me fall head over heels for you. And for the first time in my life, I'm scared to die."_

"_It used to take so much effort for me to smile but when I have you around, I don't even have to try," Lily smiled. "When I'm with you, the pain eases, world seems like a great place to be in. And I even have the strength to hope that, okay maybe I might get better. But I see myself in the mirror everyday and I know I'm not. And all I can think of is, how can I be doing this to you, it's wrong."_

"_Hey…are you blaming yourself for anything I might go through?" Sara put a finger underneath Lily's chin making her look into her eyes. "Don't do that."_

"_It's just… all a bit blur now. I used to be so sure that I am alright with all this, that this was my fate," Lily continued breaking eye contact with Sara again. "I try to not think about it. But I can truly imagine a future with you. Our own house, the million dogs running around, waking up and falling asleep in your arms, making love and even kids; as much as they scare me, AND you." _

_Sara laughed at Lily's words. "As long as they aren't a million like the dogs, I think we'll do fine." She stated teasingly. _

"_You know what I mean. I want to have that life with you. And sometimes I can't let go of the gut wrenching pain I feel when I realize I can't," Lily sighed finally looking into Sara's eyes. "I feel so bad that I'm doing this to you. That I'm leading you on of a future we probably can't have. I'm not ready to leave you baby. For once in my pathetic life, I don't want to end my life yet."_

"_Hey okay, I should have never asked whether you were scared," Sara leaned forward pulling Lily into her arms. "Just forget about it okay? And you never know, we just might get to live that life. Hopefully, you will get better."_

"_You? Being an optimist?" Lily looked up at Sara's face. "The world must be ending."_

"_Shut up," Sara chuckled before kissing her love. _

Sara felt slight patting on her back. She brushed it away and snuggled into her own arms. But the next pat was harder and a soft 'Sara' came from a timid voice which made her lift her head up. Kyle stood behind her in his pajamas with his hair messed up and his eyes puffy. Sara wasn't sure if his eyes were red from just waking up or because of crying. She gave a soft smile at the boy as she put an arm around him and pulled him to her.

"Morning sunshine," Sara said in a manner that was very unlike her which shocked her a little. "Did you get some sleep?"

"A little," Kyle nodded rubbing his eyes while leaning on Sara's sides. "What's going on here?" Kyle pointed at the mess in front of Sara.

"I was just going through some of the possibilities for your transfer and had to make some calls," Sara wiped her face and stifled a yawn. "Why don't you go get freshened up? I'll make you some breakfast."

"Okay," Kyle nodded before leaving the brunette alone in the kitchen again.

Sara sighed as she tried to get her dream out of her mind while cleaning up the table to make breakfast. Just as she put everything away, Mia walked into the room mumbling something about her whole body being numb. Sara sent her friend to freshen up same as Kyle and rummaged through the cupboards to find something edible for breakfast. After going through every one of it, she decided on cereal and toast since it seemed like Mia really needed to do grocery shopping.

When Kyle and Mia both came back into the kitchen, the three of them sat down for breakfast. But rather than eating anything, the three of them kept playing with their food. They sat in silence for almost 10 minutes without saying one word to each other before Mia finally broke the silence.

"I'm going to see Maria after this, you want to come with me?" Mia asked Sara who gulped down a mouthful of cereal with extreme difficulty.

"I have to go see Kyle's principal to settle the transfer," Sara shrugged. "And before that Kyle needs to decide where he wants to go too." She turned to Kyle who kept nodding at his food. "And go to the hospital after that." She finished with a deep breath, feeling the exhaustion hit her already.

"Okay," Mia nodded and pushed her bowl away. "I'll see Jerry at the funeral home too. Can you call me after talking to George?"

"Okay," Sara nodded, eyeing Kyle's reactions from the corner of her eyes. It was a bit scary how well the boy was hiding his emotions. He reminded a lot of herself, which to most extent was not a good thing.

Mia placed a quick kiss on Kyle's head and left the apartment. Soon enough Sara stopped eating, Kyle following her suit.

"Can I see my options?" Kyle asked scratching the back of his neck.

"I left the sites open for you to see," Sara pointed at the laptop sitting on the counter.

Kyle nodded and grabbed the laptop, heading into the living room. Sara cleaned up the plates and grabbed her phone with the intent to call Catherine. But she checked the time and thinking Catherine would have just got in from work and would be sleeping, she decided to text the blonde. She sent the message and just put her phone in her shorts pocket when it rang making her groan. She really didn't feel like talking to anyone. But when she saw that it was Catherine, her insides warmed up.

"Hey," Sara answered shortly.

"Hi there," Catherine sounded tired and maybe worried as well. "How's it going?"

"Could be better," Sara leaned on the kitchen door frame watching Kyle staring at the laptop intently. "You?"

"I'd rather be there," Catherine said frankly. "Ecklie is being a pain in the ass with Grissom gone. It's as if he owns us."

"Sounds like him," Sara said not knowing what to say.

"How's Kyle?" Catherine asked when Sara didn't say anything for a few seconds.

"He's surprisingly like me," Sara said in a slightly scared voice. "He doesn't show that he's hurting. He just keeps it in him."

"You should try to talk to him," Catherine suggested.

"I don't know," Sara scratched her head involuntarily. "Will that be a good idea?"

"It's not an easy thing to lose a parent, especially when you're that young," Catherine said. Sara nodded knowing exactly how it felt. "Even if he doesn't say it, he really needs to talk about it to someone. And I don't see anyone better than you for it."

"I guess," Sara said nervously looking straight at the boy in front of her.

"You'll be fine, don't worry," Catherine said as if sensing Sara's anxiety. "If you need anything, I'm always here." That made Sara smile.

"Okay, thanks," Sara nodded to herself. "Shouldn't you be getting some sleep?" She asked checking the time again.

"Yeah yeah," Catherine said. Sara could see the blonde rolling her eyes which made her grin. "I'll call you when I wake up okay?"

"Alright, enjoy your sleep," Sara said softly.

"If you need anything, please call?" Catherine asked pleadingly.

"Will do," Sara nodded again. "G'night."

"Thanks," Catherine said with a yawn. "Bye."

"Bye," Sara said before hanging up. "I miss you." She said at the phone before taking in a deep breath.

Shaking her head at herself, she put her phone in her pocket and headed into the living room, sitting down. She sat down next to Kyle who was going through the school websites, not with much interest but at least he was trying. They sat talking about the pros and cons of each school for a while until Kyle finally made the decision. Since she had a lot of work to do, Sara dropped Kyle at Tracy's place while she went to his school. It took a lot less effort than she thought to take care of most formalities, though she did have to spend a long time explaining her relationship with Kyle.

Sara walked out of the building, the file in her hands and the other hand buried deep in her pants pocket. The sun was blaring into the afternoon like nobody's business which was giving her a headache. As soon as she got to her car, she threw the file on the passenger seat and leaned on the door. She remembered the last time she was at Kyle's school. It was the last time she visited San Francisco, she and Lucille came to pick up Kyle from school. While they waited, they ended up rating the attractiveness of the female teachers that walked past them. Sara smiled involuntarily when she remembered how scared Lucille was when one of the teachers came over, seeing that they were staring at her, and started to flirt with Lucille. If she wasn't married, Sara knew her friend would have had no problem with it but ever since George, she never even thought of something like that. Both of them were Sara's role models. The perfect couple, perfect parents and the perfect friends; anyone who saw them would know they belong together and without the other, they didn't look complete anymore.

Sara lifted her head upwards trying to keep a tear in her eyes, biting her lips. She shook her head and got into the car to head to the hospital to either see if George was awake or to talk to his doctor to see when he would be released. She drove so slowly that it made even her wonder whether the car was moving. But it felt as if she didn't have the energy to put even the slightest effort into anything. But with the noise of horns from the back of her, she increased her speed and soon enough, she was at the hospital. She walked to the ICU, outside which Grissom sat looking like death himself.

"Hey," Sara put a hand on the older man's shoulder making him jump slightly.

"Hey," Grissom gave her a fake smile and wiped his face. "What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to see when George will be stable enough," Sara shrugged as she remained standing.

"For the service?" Grissom asked at which Sara nodded. "He has been awake for about an hour now. He keeps insisting that he's much better."

"Would it be alright for me to ask him?" Sara asked at which Grissom shrugged.

"I don't think you have a choice. She was his wife," Grissom sighed and leaned back again. Sara gave him a sympathetic look.

"Are you alright?" Sara asked knowing the answer.

"Nothing better than feeling helpless when the only people you want to protect are dragged through a bed of nails," Grissom said in a matter-of-fact tone.

"I'm sorry," Sara sighed and ran her fingers through her hair and turned to the door. "Can I go in?" She asked Grissom who nodded.

Taking in a deep breath and running how she would ask George about the funeral, Sara slowly walked into the room. The nurse checked whether George was awake before she let Sara into his room. He was still connected to so many machines, probably more than the last time she saw him. He was staring at the door when she entered, as if expecting someone to walk through the door and make things better for him.

"Hey," He said in a croaky voice and pulled down the oxygen mask. "What are you doing here?" He was still stopping after almost every word.

"First, how are you feeling?" Sara leaned on his bed.

"Physically, bit better," George tried to take in a deep breath but sighed. "Mentally, worse."

"I'm sorry," Sara said softly at which George shook his head. Both of them let the silence wrap around themselves, only the sounds of the machines coming from the room. After hesitating for a while, Sara opened her mouth again. "Urm…I just wanted to ask when you think we should have the service."

"Tomorrow, evening," George said before Sara even stopped talking. It was as if he knew what she was there for.

"That's so fast," Sara said to George at which he smiled, even though it didn't reach his eyes.

"She wouldn't want us to drag it out," George said slowly. "I already talked to the doctors so you won't have to worry."

"Did you know I was coming or something?" Sara asked not knowing how the man knew everything beforehand.

"No, but I know you very well," George said with a warm look. "So I was sort of expecting you."

"Scary," Sara said softly which made George grin which in return made Sara smile. "So then I guess I'll take care of everything."

"Thanks," George nodded. "How's Kyle?"

"Trying very hard to be strong," Sara said with a sigh.

"Talk to him," George stated making Sara frown.

"Why does everyone keep saying that?" Sara slouched slightly.

"Because he inherited a lot from you and you're the only one who truly gets how and what he thinks about," George said with the same warm look in his eyes. "He needs someone right now."

"I know," Sara said helplessly. "I just don't know whether I can be of any help."

"Sometimes one just needs another person to listen to them, that's all," George said putting the oxygen mask back on since he clearly couldn't breathe.

"Okay, no need to talk anymore," Sara patted on George's arm. "I'll come and see you later okay?" Sara bent down and kissed his forehead. George nodded and closed his eyes.

After one last look, Sara turned around and walked out into the hallway.

"What did he say?" Grissom asked making her jump a little.

"Tomorrow evening," Sara sighed taking her phone out of her pocket. "I need to tell Mia."

"That's so fast," Grissom repeated Sara's words at which Sara shrugged. "I guess it's his call."

"I need to go and take care of everything. I'll see you later okay?" Sara put an arm around Grissom giving him a quick hug.

Grissom nodded and sat back down while Sara hurried outside to call Mia. Sara waited until the phone rang continuously without an answer which made her wonder if Mia was alright. Just then, with the soft click she answered.

"Hello?" A muffled, sleepy voice answered making Sara frown.

"Mia?" Sara asked cautiously.

"No, Catherine," The voice said in the same sleepy voice.

"Cath?" Sara checked the number she dialed to confirm. _Shit, I must have had her in my mind when I dialed. Damn it, I can't believe I woke her up. _

"Sara?" Catherine's voice came a bit clearly this time. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, I was going to call Mia but I dialed you by mistake. So sorry," Sara explained slapping her own forehead.

"It's okay," Catherine said, clearly a yawn following that.

"Go back to sleep," Sara said with a sigh. "I'll talk to you when you wake up?"

"Yeah," Catherine said. "Are you sure everything's okay?"

"Yeah," Sara nodded to herself. "I guess I just missed you more than I thought."

"How sweet," Catherine said after a few seconds. "I wish I could be there with you."

"It's okay," Sara shook her head not realizing that Catherine couldn't see her. "The service is tomorrow and I'm thinking we'll go back the next day. So it's not so long."

"Yeah it's not," Catherine said. Sara could have sworn she sensed relief in Catherine's voice but she could have imagined it as well.

"Okay, I have to call Mia now," Sara said in an awkward manner.

"Alright, call me if you need me," Catherine said. "Take care okay?"

"Sure," Sara nodded again. "Bye Cath."

"Bye," Catherine said before the line went dead.

While Sara called Mia to take care of a lot of things she had to do in a little time frame, Catherine laid on her bed staring at the ceiling. She wasn't sleeping when Sara called; she was just laying in bed trying to get some sleep. But anytime she closed her eyes, the thought of Alan being back in her life ruined it for her. She rolled onto her side, hugging her pillow tightly.

She was confused. Sure she still loved the man, it wasn't easy to just stop loving someone who had taken away your heart the way Alan took hers. Though she could never ever trust him again, no matter how much she loved him. She wanted to hate him but that wasn't easy either. Hating someone you love never comes easy. She closed her eyes yet again and thankfully this time Sara's face came to her mind. She was with Sara now; someone who cares a lot for her and whom she cares a great deal for as well. She had seen the things Sara had gone through in life, yet the woman is so close to being perfect. Sure, she had that temper of hers that she keeps at the tip of her nose but now that Catherine knew some of the brunette's past, she couldn't blame her.

Catherine sighed heavily and rolled onto her back again. She could never hurt Sara. No, she WOULDN'T hurt Sara, knowingly at least. Alan walked out of her life and now he can't just walk right back in. Not when she had someone who is probably much better and much suited for her. Her mind was on overdrive and Catherine hated when that happened. Why did Alan have to come back? Couldn't he have just walked away without looking back? Why do men have to be so indecisive?

Catherine sat up and threw her pillow onto the bed. She knew she wasn't going to get any sleep this way. Deciding to get some help from her sleeping pills, she got out of her bedroom to downstairs to get them. Just when she was going through the drawer to find them, she heard a noise from the kitchen. She spun around quickly. Ever since Alan showed up at her place, she had become extremely paranoid. And she didn't think anyone could blame her. She slowly walked to the kitchen, stopping a few feet away from the door.

"Alan?" She asked cautiously. But to her surprise, Lindsey poked her head out of the kitchen doorway with a frown playing on her teenage face.

"Alan? Why the hell would he be here?" She asked curiously.

"Linds, thank God it's just you," Catherine sighed with relief. "Aren't you supposed to be at Aunt Nancy's?

"She just dropped me off," Lindsey shrugged and looked at Catherine curiously again. "Mom, are you okay? Are you seeing things?"

"No, I just need some sleep," Catherine turned around without further explanation leaving Lindsey with a dumbfounded look.

"Mom, if you need to talk, you know I am here right?" Lindsey called, surprising Catherine. She turned around to see her daughter leaning on the kitchen door.

"Thanks honey, but I just need some sleep for now," Catherine gave her a thankful smile and grabbed her pills.

"Okay, I guess I'll take a nap too," Lindsey stretched her body and followed her mother upstairs. Catherine just walked into the room when she heard Lindsey's door close.

With a sigh of both relief and pure anger, Catherine closed her bedroom door and leaned on it. Shaking her head at her own stupidity, she took her pills and laid back in bed. She closed her eyes and tried to think of nothing but the good things she had in life, from Lindsey to Sara, to friends and even work. And thankfully, before the evil that was Alan popped into her head, she drifted off to sleep.

After several hours, Catherine woke up with her head feeling as heavy as a rock. She groaned into her pillow before getting out of the bed and into the shower. Since she didn't have that much time before work, she hurried in the shower, got dressed and went downstairs. Her mother was lounging on the couch while Lindsey was softly falling asleep probably getting bored of what her mother was watching.

"Sweetie, have you had dinner?" Catherine asked Lindsey, grabbing her bag in a hurry.

"Yeah, we ordered pizza," Lindsey said softly snuggling more into the armchair.

"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow then honey," Catherine bent down and gave a kiss to her daughter and a quick hug to her mother. "Thanks mom."

"Sure sure," Her mother waved a hand since all her attention was to the television.

Catherine hurried to her car but before she got in, she grabbed her phone to call Sara. It took a while for the brunette to answer which made Catherine wonder if she had woken her up.

"Hey, you're going to be late," That was the first thing Sara said which made Catherine grin.

"I overslept thanks to the sleeping pills. I'm on my way now so I'll be fine thank you very much," Catherine said coyly. "And how are you doing my dear?"

"I'm tired as hell," Sara groaned. "But everything's taken care of so I'm glad. How are you?"

"Still half asleep," Catherine rubbed her eyes softly. "How's Kyle holding up? Talked to him yet?"

"No I haven't. I didn't get the time today," Sara said guiltily. "He just came home from Tracy. Matter of fact, I just came home too."

"You should get some rest then," Catherine stated. "You have a big day tomorrow."

"You make it sound like I'm an 8 year old," Sara mumbled softly.

"You know I'm right," Catherine said raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, I'm going to get some food and hit the bed," Sara said chewing on something. "I'll talk to you tomorrow?"

"Call me when you're up," Catherine said. "Good night dear, sweet dreams."

"Enjoy work," Sara said with a soft snigger making Catherine roll her eyes, yet with a smile. "Bye Cath."

"Bye," Catherine said before hanging up her phone and getting into her car.

Sure enough, Catherine walked into the Lab with 10 minutes to spare. Just as she reached the front desk, Judy's high pitched voice reached her ears.

"Ms. Willows?" She called making her turn around with a slight nod. "There's someone here to see you." She pointed at the visitor's bench.

Catherine turned around to see the person she least wanted to see, leaning on the wall with two cups of coffee in his hand and the innocent smile playing on his lips.

"Hi," Alan lifted the coffee cups at her making her glare at him angrily. If looks could kill, he would have died right at that moment.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Catherine said in between gritted teeth, making sure to keep her voice lowered.

"I brought you coffee," He said in his cheerful tone which made Catherine even angrier.

"I don't need your coffee," Catherine grabbed him by the arm spilling some of the coffee. "Get out of here, now."

"Don't you think that shirt is a bit revealing Cath?" Alan said raising his eyebrow while he was being dragged towards the Lab's door.

"It is not your damn business even if I walk around naked," Catherine spat letting go of the man's arm. "So get the fuck out of here."

"Be nice Cath, I'm just here to give you coffee," Alan handed the cup to her at which Catherine glared at with pure loathing. "Come on, let's just talk."

"I told you, I do not want to talk to you Alan," Catherine said again, more angrily and loudly than before.

"Don't raise your voice," Alan put the coffee cup on the chair nearby. "I just came here to talk to you. Why is it so fucking difficult?" He grabbed her right bicep tightly, slightly hurting her.

"Let go of me," Catherine tried to brush away his hand but his grip was too tight on her.

"Just listen to me," Alan said between gritted teeth.

"Hey hey, man let go of her," Nick's loud voice came from behind Alan and the man was thrown off of Catherine to the other side of the hallway.

"I'm a friend," Alan pointed at Catherine who rubbed her biceps.

"Doesn't look like she appreciates your friendship buddy," Nick stepped forward making Alan back against the wall. True, Alan was well built but he was no match to Nick.

"I'll talk to you later Cath," Alan said before heading to the front door.

"I do not want to talk to you," Catherine called and turned to the hallway to see a small crowd gathered around to watch the show. "Don't you all have work to do? Go on, get to work." She spat at the crowd all of whom slowly went back to their business. Catherine turned to Nick who was giving her a look asking several question just by his look.

"Who the hell was that?" He pointed at the door making Catherine sigh.

"I appreciate your help Nick," Catherine lifted a hand at her colleague. "But this is my business and I'd appreciate it if you stay out of it."

With that she left the man with a confused look.

"Okkkay," Nick raised his hands in surrender. "What the hell was up with that man?" He said to himself before heading to the break room, hoping that a cup of coffee might make the shift turn into something better than it had already been.

Catherine slammed her office door feeling lousier than she had in a while. She fell into her chair and slammed her head on the table repeatedly. After a while of trying to take in deep breaths, she grabbed the assignment slips and walked out of her office, hoping that Sara was having a better night than her. Unfortunately, Sara was laying on her bed with Kyle next to her, staring at the ceiling unable to sleep. She was stuck within her own mind which was on over drive. It was as if neither of the women was destined to have a good night that night.

* * *

The morning was incredibly gloomy. The sky was cloudy and the air was chilly. Sara had spent the whole night on the couch, wide awake thinking about nothing but saying goodbye to her friend. It was 9 in the morning now and Sara was the only one awake. Deciding that she'd at least act as if she got some sleep, she decided to take a shower. After a about half an hour of standing under the cold water, she walked out of the bathroom, with her hair still damn to see Kyle sitting on the bed with his eyes wide open.

"Hey are you okay?" Sara sat down, putting the towel on her thigh.

"I couldn't sleep," Kyle laid back down, but this time with his head on Sara's lap. He wrapped his arms around Sara's waist tightly as if scared to let go. She felt his cast brush against her back.

"Neither could I," Sara patted on the boy's head. "Do you want to talk about it?" She asked hesitantly.

"No," Kyle shook his head and sat up again. "But can I ask you something?" Sara nodded at the boy looking intently into his eyes. "Who is giving the eulogy?"

"I think everyone expects me to do it," Sara shrugged. "Why?"

"Can I do it?" Kyle asked softly at which Sara's eyes widened. "Please?"

"Sure, but do you think you will be okay doing it?" Sara asked running her hand over Kyle's head.

"Yeah, I want to do it," Kyle nodded and got out of bed. "It's at 4 right?" Sara nodded .

Just then Sara remembered something. "SHIT! I forgot about the song," She slapped her forehead loudly.

"I don't think it's a problem," Kyle said stopping at the bathroom door. "Dad did say she wouldn't have wanted us to make it so big right?"

"I guess," Sara grabbed her hair, feeling very angry at herself. "I just wanted it to fit her well."

"It already does. It's simple and elegant, fits her just perfectly," Kyle said before disappearing into the bathroom.

Sara shook her head and dropped onto her back covering her face in her hands. Just then, her phone on the nightstand rang loudly. She quickly grabbed it, just to stop the loud noise from playing.

"Sara," She said formally.

"Hey, it's me," Catherine said softly. She sounded as if she had a lot in her mind. "How are you doing?"

"Frankly, I have no idea," Sara rubbed her temple with her free hand. "Are you alright? You sound as if something's bothering you."

"No, just a busy day," Catherine said quickly which told Sara that there was more to it than just a busy day. But if Catherine wasn't telling her, she must have a good reason. "I really miss you." The blonde said in a hopeless tone.

"I miss you too," Sara said truthfully. "Are you sure nothing's wrong Cath?"

"I'm just very tired," Catherine took in a deep breath.

"Well, why don't you tell me about the day then," Sara laid down making herself comfortable on the bed. "It might make us both a little less stressed. You can bitch about whoever and whatever you want."

"Are you sure you know what you're asking for?" Catherine said in a teasing tone.

"Bring it baby," Sara said and hummed before Catherine started talking.

From the other side of the line, Catherine started talking, purposely leaving the part about Alan behind. Sara listened to everything Catherine said, laying in her bed, hugging her towel with her eyes closed and replying to what her girlfriend was saying as well. She lifted her head up when she heard the bathroom door open. She saw Kyle walk out of the bathroom, give her an intrigued look before heading out of the bedroom and closing the door behind him.

Sara didn't know how long she laid in bed talking to Catherine. For the first time in the few days both of them were laughing and enjoying sometime together. After a while, Sara checked the call time on her phone to be shocked.

"Wow, it's going to be an hour Cath," Sara said with a chuckle.

"I have been rambling off for an hour?" Catherine said in a shocked voice.

"I think we both have," Sara said softly.

"Well thank you, for letting me talk on and on," Catherine said in a sheepish manner.

"It's okay, helped me too," Sara sighed heavily sitting up on the bed and stretching her body. "But I probably should go make the last minute arrangements."

"Okay, call me afterward please?" Catherine said with a sigh.

"You know I will," Sara stifled a yawn. "Try to get some sleep without popping pills why don't you?"

"Hey I tried," Catherine said defensively with a chuckle. "Not my fault that my body is betraying me."

"Okay okay, no need to bite my head off sweetheart," Sara grinned. "I'll talk to you when you wake up from a good night or day's sleep."

"Thanks," Catherine yawned. "Just for your information, I'd much rather crawl into your arms and sleep."

"I'd rather have that too," Sara sighed heavily. "Just one more day right?"

"Yeah, I can deal with that," Catherine grinned happily. "Bye Sar."

"Bye bye," Sara stated softly and hung up when the line went dead.

Sara quickly straightened herself up and walked out of the room into the living room to see Kyle staring at the television blankly while Mia laid on the recliner with her eyes closed. She couldn't tell if the woman was sleeping or just laying there but she did not look good at all. Kyle was softly scratching the cast which was accessorizing his left arm. Sara was a bit taken back realizing that she had almost forgotten that the boy had broken his arm. Maybe it was because he had not shown anything regarding that. He really was her clone.

"What time do we have to get ready?" Kyle asked not taking his eyes off of the television.

"We'll leave around 2:30," Sara sat down turning towards the television to see that Kyle was staring at a hockey match. She frowned knowing that Kyle hated that. But it must be keeping his mind distracted because surely enough, it was working on her.

They sat staring at the television, a football game came on after the hockey match. Mia sat up and joined them, three of them just staring at the television in complete silence. Around 1 in the afternoon, Travis, Tracy and Aaron came over, looking as gloomy as the occupants of the apartment. They had their clothes with them for the service.

Since they didn't have much until the service, they decided that they needed to eat at least something. Kyle and Sara refused but with the begging from the rest of the group, they sat at the dining table looking like two grumpy two year olds forced to eat crappy good. After food, they headed to their respective rooms to get ready. Kyle stayed in the living room until Sara got ready so that she could help him put on the monkey suit (as he calls it) for the service. He never did understand why his mom bought that ridiculous suit for him. But he did remember what she told him when he asked.

"_Everyone needs to have a good suit sweetie, you never know when you might have to wear it," _He remembered her trying to make him understand at the tailor.

"_When you pay someone your last respects, you need to show them respect and honor their memory. And as much as you look hot in a jeans and t-shirt, a suit gives and earns respect," _She ended with a wink.

Kyle shook his head and chuckled at her mother's words ringing through his head. She always knew how to make him do things he least wanted to do. Maybe because she was so close to Sara, she knew exactly what to say to make Sara do anything she never wanted to do. And as much as he or Sara denied it, he was a lot like his biological mother. Just then, Sara walked out of her room wearing a simple black dress that stopped at her mid calves and a matching jacket thrown over her arm. Kyle smiled at her at which Sara nodded.

"Your suit's on the bed. I don't think your cast will fit into your shirt's arm so do you mind if I cut it off?" Sara raised an eyebrow at which Kyle stood up and stretched.

"Be my guest," Kyle said before Sara threw her jacket on the chair nearby and lead him into the bedroom. While he grabbed the pants and headed into the bathroom, he saw Sara sit down with a pair of scissors looking quite conniving.

When Kyle walked out of the bathroom, Sara was going through a book on the nightstand. His shirt lay on the bed with one sleeve missing. He grinned and grabbed the shirt putting it onto his good hand. He looked at Sara for help but the brunette was a bit caught up in the book.

"Urm…help?" Kyle said awkwardly trying to get hold of the other sleeve but failing miserably.

"Oh sorry," Sara turned around and quickly helped him put on the shirt, even tuck it in.

"Ah I hate tucking in my shirt," Kyle groaned while Sara laughed and adjusted the shirt.

"Well you look very handsome," Sara patted on his cheek. "Enough to break any girl's heart."

"Eh, I don't really care about girls," Kyle shrugged and grabbed the jacket which Sara helped him put on. "Do I have to put on a tie?"

"Yes you do," Sara said grabbing the tie and tying the knot. "And what do you mean you don't care about girls?"

"Don't get the wrong idea, I'm not gay," Kyle chuckled while Sara put the tie around his neck and adjusted it. "I just don't have the energy to care about them. They are a bit too high maintenance."

"You got that right," Sara grinned and patted on his jacket checking him out. "You look perfect. Very handsome." She added in an surprised tone.

"Are you surprised?" Kyle scratched his cast over his jacket raising an eyebrow, the same way Sara does when she feels even a bit mischievous.

"A little," Sara smiled. "Since you're my son and all."

"You're very beautiful too," Kyle shrugged. "I must have gotten more than just your brains."

"I see you got the tongue to make girls giggle too," Sara raised an eyebrow. "Dangerous combination."

"I know right?" Kyle grinned, for the first time his smile reaching his eyes.

Just then Mia poked her head into the room, for the first time in her life, wearing a dress. "Ready?" She asked throwing her hair back. She really did look stunning in the black dress.

"Are you wearing a dress?" Kyle and Sara both said at the same time, in the same tone which shocked both of them.

"Yeah," Mia ran her hand on the back of her neck. "Luce got it for me for my last birthday," A soft 'oh' escaped from Kyle and Sara at which Mia quivered her eyebrows. "Sadly enough, when she gave it to me I laughed and when she tried to convince me that it'll look very good on me, I said if it fits when the day comes, I'll wear it for her funeral," She shrugged when Kyle and Sara exchanged sad looks. "Irony's a bloody bitch sometimes."

"Yeah it is," Sara nodded and put an arm around her friend, the other around her son leading them both out of the bedroom. "She'll be glad you at least wore it."

"Yeah, why else do you think I'm wearing a suit," Kyle stated with a shrug.

With matching smiles, three of them headed out of the apartment with Travis, Tracy and Aaron following them closely.

It was ironic but the day was sort of perfect for a funeral. The sky was still cloudy yet the sun was softly shining through the clouds. The wind was making the trees sway softly and the leaves dance on the ground. Since the service was outside (which was Kyle's idea), the place looked more beautiful than depressing. The white orchids were decorating the place beautifully and the little white tent almost looked perfect.

Sara felt a bit suffocated as soon as she stepped into the graveyard. Involuntarily, her grip on Kyle's hand tightened and to her surprise, so did his. The 6 of them headed to the tent as slowly as they could to see a lot of familiar faces already waiting for them. Heather was already there, looking more like Lady Heather than herself, which Sara found quite comforting. Maybe it was because she's used to seeing Heather as a dominatrix than anything else. She gave each of them a hug when they stepped into the tent, a bigger one to Kyle. After that, to Kyle's dismay, everyone started to hover on him which he really didn't want. But no one could save him since they were being surrounded by people as well. But they all did give them their space when Lucille's coffin came. It wasn't an open casket, because George said that Lucille wouldn't have wanted that.

It took a while for people to settle down. They kept looking at each other, wondering what they were waiting for. Soon enough, the ambulance pulled over and Grissom jumped out of the back in his suit with a nurse following him. Travis hurried over to help them and soon George appeared on a wheelchair along with his doctor. He was still accessorized with the IV and so much more but at least he was sitting up. He didn't look any better but he still managed to smile at Travis when he gave the man a hug.

The nurse and doctor stayed with the ambulance while Travis brought George over and stopped the chair next to Kyle who gave his father a hurt look. Grissom sat down next to Heather who took his hand. He looked more worn out than the last time Sara saw him.

"How are you holding up kiddo?" George asked Kyle who put his head on his father's shoulder.

"I don't know," Kyle said softly. "You?"

"A bit fucked up," George said. Sara smiled. That was the first time George has ever used that kind of language in front of Kyle. To someone who swears a million times on an hourly basis, he really did control his language around his son.

Just then, the Minister grabbed everyone's attention. Sara stared blankly at the balding man in front of them, talking about God knows what. She kept staring at his lips but she couldn't hear what he was saying. All she kept thinking was that the man must be a smoker due the blackening lips and the almost yellow teeth. And she kept asking herself whether Ministers were allowed to smoke. Then her attention was grabbed by his shaking hands that were holding the bible. _He must be ill. _She thought.

And then just like that, her attention was taken away from the Minister by the coffin that sat behind him. It was only then it hit her that it was her best friend in there. Her throat closed up making it impossible for her to breathe right. Her hands started to shake and she felt cold, colder than she was before. She could feel her heart beat so fast that it almost scared her. She felt as if someone had hit her chest and taken her soul out.

"Hey, are you okay?" Sara turned her head to the voice that snapped her out of her own mind. Kyle was giving her a scared look and so was George. Sara nodded and tried to gulp down. "You look like someone drained all the color out of you." Kyle said at which Sara shook her head.

"Everyone looks like that right now," Sara defended herself at which Kyle nodded, not assured by her words.

It took a while for the Minister to stop talking. He called forth a family member to say a few words and George along with everyone else turned to Sara. But Sara turned to Kyle who straightened his jacket with one hand and stood up making everyone take a sharp intake of breath. Sara saw George give her a shocked look.

"He asked," Sara mouthed.

George frowned and followed his son's movement to the front of the crowd. Kyle wiped the hair that had fallen onto his face and gave his mother's coffin a longing look. After that he turned to the crowd and took in a deep breath.

"Evening," Kyle started formally gulping down loud enough for everyone to hear.

"If anyone doesn't already know, I'm Kyle. Lucille's son," He said pointed behind at the coffin. Those words itself made a lot smile since everywhere there knew perfectly well who he was.

"I don't have any written speech. I did think of writing one but then I thought no one can put down what my mother was in a piece of paper. There aren't enough nice words to describe how great she was," Kyle said shrugging and putting his free hand in his pocket. Sara made a fist trying to stop her hands from shaking but she knew it wasn't working.

"I have always heard that a child's worst nightmare is losing a parent. I never could relate to it until today. I didn't even want to believe it at first," His eyes focused on Sara who was trying very hard not to shake. "Not only because she's my mother but also because she was a wonderful human being. I always felt like the world would be off balance without her in it." He shrugged again.

"She used to scare me a bit," Kyle grinned. "She always knew what to say and what to do to turn a terrible situation into a better one. I kind of wish that she was here right now to make things better. She was the best mother one could ask for. And I don't think I would be lying if I say she was the best wife, best friend and best sister even." He turned to the front row, all of whom nodded automatically. All except Sara and George, both of whom looked as if they were frozen.

"I don't know if these would be their favorites but I remember the best advices my mom gave to some of her friends, and dad and Uncle Aaron of course. If I cross any line of privacy, somebody stop me okay? I might be telling some embarrassing stories here," Kyle said to everyone who even with depression written all over their faces, looked intrigued.

"There was this one time, when Mia was dating Liam," He turned to a man who was sitting a bit further behind. He saw the man raise an intrigued eyebrow. He also saw Mia's eyes grow wide with anxiety. "If I remember correctly, she was having second thoughts about something. She was talking a lot, not giving mom a chance to say one word. And in the middle, mom stopped her and asked her one thing; whether she trusted him. And when she said yes, mom smiled. I remember that smile till today. It was so calming and so assuring. She said that if she can trust him then she had nothing to worry about. That trust conquers anything and everything in this world. That people say love can overcome anything but a love without trust is like a sword made of paper, worthless and it only hurts the person wielding it." He finished giving Mia a shrug. She was trying very hard to keep it all together.

"Then there was when Uncle Aaron was having troubles with his boss," Kyle sighed. "He was ready to quit. But mom gave him a hug and said, I didn't raise a brother who was weak. She said that a person who quits when it starts to rain is someone useless, but someone who walks through the rain and still gets the job done is mightier than a Knight of the Round Table. A person someone could depend on and sometimes that's all someone needs to see to make them treat you better. " His words made light sobs escape Aaron's already trembling lips.

"Sometimes she really does have weird analogies, though she does gives the best advices even using weird ones," Kyle chuckled, but it was slightly sarcastic. "Though, the best advice, I think I have heard mom give was to dad and to Sara."

"She said to Sara that even though she had lost one star in her life, if she looks up the sky she will still find a lot of bright stars, shining just for her, being there for her anytime and anywhere she needs," Kyle stared at Sara who was biting her lips painfully. She was visibly shaking. "That losing one person she loves does not mean that you have to drag your life down the sewer because that person itself would not want her to do that. And that when one feels the most distressed, their true friends will one way or the other will know to bring a smile to their faces, without fail. So trust in your friends, we are always here for you."

"And dad, I think the best thing she ever said was that even though you and her had gone through hell and back in life, as long as you have faith in her, she will always be your strength," He said, finally his voice cracking slightly. "Even if, God forbids, anything happen to her, all he needs to do is think of the good times rather than the bad and she was sure that you would feel better." He spoke to his dad who smiled appreciatively.

"And the best advice my mom ever gave me was, if you're going to drink, call me. Never drink and drive," Kyle said with an honest laugh. "And now I think I'm dragging this too long. So I'll just say that we all are going to miss you mom. More than you ever imagined. And you'll always be in our hearts and in our lives. I'll always remember you, in good times and bad. You will always be my favorite person in this world and I love you very very much. I hope you have a cracking time up there with the angels."

His last words, Kyle said looking up at the sky. With that he gave his 'audience' one last look and slowly walked down and sat down. With a trembling hand, George took his son's hand and squeezed it, smiling at his son.

"Your mom would have loved that," He said with difficulty.

"Yeah? Good, that's what I was going for," Kyle said before putting his head back on his father's shoulder.

Throughout the rest of the ceremony, everyone just followed the Minister like zombies as if they had no minds of their own. After the burial, everyone started leaving after giving their condolences to George, Kyle and the rest of Lucille's 'family'.

Finally, it was their time to leave. No one wanted to leave; it would mean that they will finally have to say goodbye to Lucille. The one person who meant a lot in each of their lives. They all stood around the grave in silent, not knowing what to do.

"We should go," Grissom finally said.

As if it was a cue, Aaron broke into tears again after holding it together for a while. Tracy hugged Mia for her dear life crying loudly onto the woman's shoulder who finally broke down, her eyes not leaving Lucille's grave even once. Travis put his arm around Aaron and let his tears roll down while Grissom held Heather, quickly wiping off any tear that rolled down his cheek. The only people who weren't crying were Kyle, Sara and George. Kyle was squatting next to his father's chair who had an arm around his son, staring at his wife's grave. And Sara just stood there. All she could think was; she was gone. Really gone. And that she would never come back, same as Lily. And she felt numb, nothing more, nothing less. Just numb.

* * *

**Thanks for reading...lemme no what you thought :) **


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

**Okay, i think i can keep up with this pace of updating, plus a week of holiday helps. Thanks for the reviews, meant a lot. Hope you all like this chapter.**

**To nic :)**

**Disclaimer: Same as chapter 1...ENJOY **

* * *

The sound of glass breaking and laughter filled the living room. Kyle shook his head with a smile, sipping his coke quietly. He watched Mia try to step over the broken beer bottle all the while trying not to fall. He turned to Sara who was sitting on the recliner he was sitting in, enjoying her beer with a coy smile playing on her lips. Her face was red and sweat was breaking from her forehead.

"Is she going to be alright?" Kyle asked Sara who took a sip from the bottle.

"Don't worry, she's been more drunk than this," Sara leaned forward putting an arm around Kyle who leaned on her.

They both turned to the scene in front of them. Travis was sitting on the couch with his guitar in his lap enjoying his scotch while Tracy laughed at Mia with her drink in her hand. Aaron was passed out on the other recliner nearby while Grissom and Heather sat on the smaller couch, Heather enjoying the same drink as Tracy and Grissom sipping his Scotch. The man's face was as red as Sara's and he was very quiet. It was nothing new; when Grissom got drunk, he didn't talk at all.

"Ow bloody hell," Mia skipped to the couch and dropped in between Tracy and Travis, checking her foot. "I think I got it in my bloody foot. Oh wait no, false alarm." She said wiping her foot happily.

"Okay, who's cleaning that?" Tracy pointed at the mess.

"You made me drop it so you clean it," Mia grabbed another beer from the table.

Sara laughed at the two women who started to quarrel. They had all gone to the hospital after the ceremony with George. None of them wanted to go back home, especially Kyle. He took his time in his father's room, saying goodbye to a man he didn't want to leave alone. And since he was leaving the following day, leaving his home behind, everyone let him do whatever he wanted. Afterwards, they all went to Lucille and George's house, for Kyle to pack and everyone else to break into their liquor cabinet. They all decided that since they were all messed up, getting a drink would be the best idea. And as Mia puts it, it would be honoring Lucille's memory.

"I wish I can let you have a drink," Sara patted on Kyle's head making the boy chuckle.

"I'll wait until I'm 18 thanks," Kyle raised his soda bottle making Sara laugh.

"Are you done with packing?" Sara asked softly knowing Kyle didn't want to talk about it. The boy nodded with a hum. "I'm sorry you have to leave."

"It's alright," Kyle sighed. "None of us have a choice do we?"

"I guess not," Sara mumbled softly before her phone rang in her pocket. She checked the caller ID to see Catherine's name flickering on the screen. "I need to take this." She said to Kyle before hurrying into the kitchen where it was a bit quieter, grabbing a glass of scotch from the table. "Hey Cath." She said in a tune.

"Are you drunk?" Catherine's amused voice met Sara's ears.

"A little," Sara said taking a sip of the scotch. "I was going to call you but I got distracted."

"It's alright," Catherine said, still in an amused tone. "How's everyone doing?"

"I think the only ones sober are Heather and Kyle," Sara said with a chuckle.

"Why is she sober? Doesn't she drink?" Catherine asked curiously.

"She needs to drive Grissom back to their hotel so she can't be drunk," Sara explained in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Oh okay. Well, I'm glad you're enjoying yourself," Catherine said with a sigh.

"I'm not," Sara said frankly. "I just don't need my mind to stay on override, at least for tonight."

"I understand," Catherine said softly. "Are you going to be okay?"

"If I manage to pass out then I should be just fine," Sara chuckled gulping down the rest of the scotch in one shot. "How's it going babe?" She said her inhibitions going lower with every passing second.

"I'm good, managed to sleep without popping any pills as you asked," Catherine said with a grin.

"Isn't that's awesome," Sara said jumping on the counter. "I wish you were here."

"So do I," Catherine mumbled softly. "It would be fun to have you drunk around me, just me. I bet you're fun when you're drunk, especially in the bedroom."

"Did you have some dirty dream Catherine?" Sara said pouting her lips coyly.

"Maybe," Catherine grinned softly. "Or I just miss you."

"That's why you want me alone, drunk in a bedroom with you?" Sara chuckled. "I have to say, I like it when you miss me."

"Well what can I say, I like the idea of doing a lot of things with you," Catherine said in the most flirtatious tone Sara had heard her use.

"And what might be those things huh?" Sara asked biting her lips, enjoying the conversation.

"Oh why don't you let your imagination run wild," Catherine sighed heavily. "I think you can think of somethings. Things that would leave me naked, moaning under your touch, sweaty, red and very much satisfied. Anything come to mind?"

"Oh several things came to mind," Sara grinned finishing off her beer that sat on the counter as well.

"Good," Catherine laughed softly. "I could really use you right now. Too bad you aren't here."

"Don't remind me," Sara groaned. "Where are you? At work?" She asked taking a chance.

"No, I'm still in bed," Catherine said her voice slightly muffled as if her face was pushed against something. "I called Nick and told him I'll be a bit late."

"Why?" Sara asked curiously.

"Because I slept in tonight," Catherine yawned. "I had a bad backache when I woke up."

"Oh, are you okay now?" Sara asked in a worried tone.

"Don't worry, it was just an aftermath from the sleep," Catherine said with a soft laugh.

"What the hell were you dreaming of?" Sara asked feeling more curious than before.

"A lot," Catherine said slyly making Sara laugh. "Let's just say it was really good."

"Well I'm glad you got some nice sleep then," Sara said at which Catherine hummed.

"Yeah I needed it," Catherine said. Then they fell silent. Neither of them knew what to say.

"So…did you by any chance know that I had a crush on you when we first started working together?" Sara said grabbing something out of thin air.

"You did?" Catherine let out a soft laugh. "How come I never knew about this?"

"Because I didn't announce it to the whole world?" Sara said in a matter-of-fact tone. "I only told Lucille. And she bet that I'd sleep with you within at least 2 months." She chuckled.

"Oh wow, you were quite the player weren't you?" Catherine asked mischievously.

"No, it's just Lucille knows how I get if I get my eyes on someone," Sara shrugged. "I mean, she knew." She corrected herself depressing herself all over again.

"I'm sorry," Catherine said not knowing what else to say. "I wish I can say something to make you feel better."

"It's okay," Sara shook her head and grabbed a new bottle of scotch from the open liquor cabinet. "I'll be alright." She smiled at the bottle.

"Urm…" Catherine mumbled awkwardly.

"You have to go to work?" Sara suggested taking a swig off of the scotch bottle.

"Yeah I'm sorry," Catherine said softly. "I wish I can stay and talk to you."

"It's okay really," Sara shook her head again. "I'll see you tomorrow night anyway."

"Yeah you will. And maybe then I won't have to take care of _things_ by myself," Catherine's voice turned flirtatious again, making the air a lot more comfortable.

"Trust me, you won't have to," Sara said gulping down another mouthful of scotch. "Try to work without getting distracted okay?"

"That's going to be hard," Catherine said with a soft moan which made Sara cough out what was in her mouth.

"What are you doing?" Sara asked coughing slightly.

"I'll let you guess," Catherine said before Sara heard a sound which sounded as if she sucked her finger. "I should go now or else I'll be much later than I'm supposed to be at work."

"Oh you're mean," Sara jumped out of the counter, running her fingers through her hair.

"Will that keep your mind from going over drive tonight? Or do you think I should let you hear me throughout this whole thing?" Catherine asked coyly.

"No no, this should be enough thank you very much," Sara said quickly and then she smiled. Sure enough, she felt a lot calmer and her head felt lighter. "You know, you're freaking amazing? I can so fall in love with you." She said before she could stop herself. She smacked her forehead as soon as she realized what she had said.

"You're everything I can ask for too," Catherine surprised Sara after a few seconds of silence. "And we have a long way ahead of us so of course one day, we can without any hesitance say that we love each other. I know that."

"Okay," Sara said, confused and in shock.

"I'll talk to you in the morning okay?" Catherine said to which Sara hummed in agreement. "I hope you get some sleep. And I hope I was of some help in distracting your mind just now."

"You were, thanks," Sara sighed. "Bye Cath."

"Bye Sar," Catherine said before the line went dead.

Sara stared at the phone for a few seconds before she put it on the counter and grabbed the scotch bottle. While stepping out of the kitchen, she took two swigs off the bottle and slowly walked back to the recliner on which Kyle was sitting. She wasn't paying much attention what was going on in the living room since she was still stunned by what she had just said to Catherine.

"How's Catherine?" Kyle asked making Sara jump slightly.

"She's okay," She smiled softly.

"Do you miss her?" Kyle asked curiously. He saw Sara turn to him with a twinkle in her eyes. It was clear that she was having a hard time focusing on anything but he noticed that when it came to Catherine, Sara had a clear view of it all.

"Surprisingly, yes," Sara grinned and took a sip off her bottle.

"Why does it surprise you?" Kyle frowned putting one leg on the chair, rubbing his feet softly. He had been standing on them for so long that they were numb.

"I'm not used to it. Missing someone or even dating someone again," Sara shrugged leaning back on the recliner, closing her eyes while hugging the bottle.

"Lily?" Kyle asked softly making Sara squint one eye open. He gave her a sympathetic smile at which she sighed.

"It's not so easy to just move on like that," Sara closed her eye again. "And this thing with Catherine happened out of nowhere."

"A bit too fast for you?" Kyle asked curiously.

"You ask big questions for such a little guy," Sara chuckled messing up Kyle's hair.

"I am your son aren't I?" Kyle said making Sara open her eyes and tilt her head appreciatively.

"Yes you are," Sara smiled. "And yes, it's all going a bit fast for me. I feel as if this relationship is a rebound thing for the both of us."

"I so don't know what to say to that," Kyle shrugged awkwardly with a frown.

"No need honey," Sara grinned and laid back. But she sat up right back when Mia and Tracy started to sing ungodly songs in annoying high pitched voices. "OYE, neighbors."

"Screw the neighbors," Tracy called when Travis started to strum his guitar. "Sorry Kyle baby."

Kyle nodded and turned to Sara who shook her head. Just then, Grissom stood up swaying on his spot a little. Heather quickly got up and put his arm around her neck holding the man up.

"I think I'm going to take him back to the hotel," Heather said to Sara who nodded. Heather carefully lead Grissom through the living room and out of the door while the older man kept mumbling something that was only audible to him.

"Bloody hell it's late," Mia swore seeing the clock.

"So? It's not like we have anything else to do," Sara said enjoying another mouthful of scotch. She didn't know why she did, but she carefully stood up from the recliner only to stumble on her own feet and get slammed against the wall.

"Whoa whoa," Sara held the wall trying to stop her head from spinning.

"Are you alright?" Kyle asked standing up.

"Uh huh," Sara nodded and took another swig off of her bottle.

"I think you have had enough," Kyle grabbed the bottle at which Sara let out a hurt 'hey'. But the boy gave her a stern look and put the bottle on the table. "You should sleep." He said to Sara who raised her eyebrows quirkily.

"Sweetheart, I'm supposed to take care of you, not the other way around," Sara grinned slightly zigzagging her way to the table and kneeling down next to it. "Plus I've a high tolerance for alcohol."

"I know but you have to go back tomorrow," Kyle said pushing the alcohol away from Sara. "And you need to sleep off your high." He pulled on Sara's arm but all he managed to do was make Sara lay down on her sides. "Oh come on," Kyle rolled his eyes.

"I wish Lily was here," Sara said at which everyone turned to her in a snap. Maybe because she hadn't mentioned Lily to her friends during the trip or because they just found the trivia fascinating in their drunken state. "Hey I have a question for you guys. You think I can move on from Lily and be happy with Catherine?" She lifted her upper body and asked her friends.

Mia nodded her head vigorously like a three year old while Tracy scrunched her face in thought.

"Sure love why not," Travis answered in a surprisingly well held voice. "Though we do think you two are going with this a bit fast. Take your time, don't just dive in. First you check if you like what the water feels, then you slowwwwwly get in and swim in it like a little fish and you just keep swimming." He said gesturing with his hands. The three women and Kyle stared at the man with nothing but question in their eyes.

"What?" Sara said bluntly after staring at the man blankly for a few seconds.

"Don't go too fast," Travis said irritably. "I was going for the cool metaphor thing but you all had to ruin it for me."

"Your metaphor sucked," Mia said in a matter-of-fact tone.

"So wait, you all think I'm hasting it with Catherine?" Sara asked sitting up, hugging her knees. She was quite interested in what her friends thought. She saw the three of them exchanged worried looks which made it even more interesting.

"Kind of," Tracy shrugged.

"We just think you two got into the relationship while you were going through hell within yourselves," Mia said rubbing her eyes.

"So when you two got together, you didn't just come together, you got smashed against each other," Travis said slowly strumming the guitar.

"And when you get smashed together, you like the feeling for awhile. But when you slowly start to feel yourself again, you might not like what you're smashed up against," Tracy finished her drink and licked her lips.

"What's with you all and fucked up metaphors tonight?" Sara said and then turned to Kyle. "You're going to hear a lot of swearing here tonight, just forget it ever happened okay?"

"Done deal," Kyle gave her a thumb up and sat down in the recliner enjoying the grownups drunken conversation. To him the people in front him looked like one of his science experiments that he could never get bored of observing.

"You like Catherine, we all know that," Mia sighed. "But I just think you are depending a lot on her and she is doing the same with you. I mean, you guys just started this whole 'friends' thing and to go from that to dating so fast is kind of weird."

"Plus you fucked her on your first date," Travis pointed at Sara who looked horrified.

"How the hell do you know that?" Sara said loudly. "What the fuck have you been doing? Spying on us?"

"No, but we saw the bloody marks on Catherine and you," Mia said softly.

"So we slept together a bit fast so what?" Sara said defensively, fighting the embarrassing blush creeping on her cheeks.

"Look honey, we can't be happier that you're trying to move on," Tracy leaned forward letting her hair fall over her shoulders. "But we just want you to be sure that this thing with Catherine will work. I mean she just got out of an engagement right? Are you sure it's not a rebound phase for her?"

"Or whether it's not just an emotional reaction by you for losing Lily?" Travis pointed out.

"Or that you both got caught up in something during an emotional time that it was just a reaction to the situation?" Mia followed his suit.

"Why the fuck am I hearing about all this only now?" Sara said annoyed at her friends.

"Because we have been fucking preoccupied," Mia stated frankly.

"I guess all what you have said are possibilities, I won't deny it," Sara wiped her face, trying to be in denial. "I just want to know if we, or I will be able to get past all that and still be happy with her. You all know me, so tell me?"

"You are one woman whom if you put your heart into something, you will damn fucking make sure it works," Travis chuckle. "So I'm sort of sure that you can work it out."

"But we don't know Catherine, so we can't speak for her," Mia shrugged.

"I think she can," Kyle said grabbing everyone's attention. He smiled at everyone before he spoke again. "She isn't someone who would do something just for the sake for it. Or to get some sort of ridiculous pleasure for a while and walk out leaving someone hurt." He shrugged. "She sounds like someone who'd not give up too easily."

"How the ruddy hell would you know all that?" Mia asked Kyle to receive a slap on the back by Tracy.

"He's a kid, ask nicely," She slurred her words.

"Okay fine," Mia rolled her eyes. "How do you know that my dear boy?" She made everyone laugh.

"Because…" He sighed taking a few seconds to finish his sentence. "Because she's a lot like mom. And mom was never the kind of person who would give up easily."

Everyone kept staring at Kyle making the boy a little bit uncomfortable. But he knew that they were not focused on him but rather lost in their own thoughts. They all knew that their friend wasn't someone who would walk out of something because it got a little bit difficult. And true enough, Catherine was quite the same.

"It could work perfectly smoothly man," Travis played a riff quickly making Sara chuckle. "You just have one question to answer," He shrugged. "Is this love baby or is it just confusion?" He said to the tone of the song.

"Quoting Jimi Hendrix? Really?" Tracy tilted her head Travis who looked smug.

"The man was a God," Travis leaned back putting the guitar down.

"As corny as it is, he is right," Mia pointed at Travis who was bobbing his head to himself mouthing a song. "Do you think it's just confusion?"

"No, I'm pretty sure I like her," Sara said frankly. "I don't love her but…" She stopped in mid.

"Buuuuut?" Mia asked curiously crossing her legs.

"I _think_ I can fall in love with her," Sara shrugged. "And she thinks the same."

"She does?" Tracy smiled genuinely at which Sara nodded, very much like a little girl who was asked if she wanted candy. "Ah sweetheart then you don't have anything to worry about. You two are going to be just fine."

"Yeah, now you know that it's going a bit too fast," Mia scratched the back of her neck. "All you need to do is put on the brakes on that fast car you're driving for a while."

"Just for your information, I'm hating the use of damn metaphors," Sara wiped her forehead.

"Deal with it love," Mia winked.

"Babe, we love you, you know that," Tracy yawned. "We just want to be sure that you don't get hurt. And we're very happy for you too that you found someone as freaking amazing as Catherine. We all do like her a lot."

"Yeah, we do," Travis nodded. "She got a fine piece of ass."

"Don't be the creepy dude who checks out the friend's girlfriend man," Mia patted on Travis's back making the man pout.

"Thank you," Sara said not sure of what to say. "And I appreciate you all for being frank with me. Now let's just hope this doesn't get messed up shall we?" She grabbed a shot glass from the table and raised it for her friends all of whom followed her suit. "To moving on?" She suggested.

"To moving on,"

"Hell yeah,"

"Cheers,"

"You all should crash now before clothes start to come off," Kyle said in between making all of them laugh. Mia was caught while she was just taking the shot which ended up her spraying the alcohol on Sara's face making the brunette groan loudly.

"What the fuck Mia," Sara stood up wiping her face, stumbling to keep balance. "Okay I'm off to bed before I witness any throwing up."

"Come on," Kyle put Sara's hand on his shoulder letting the woman put a certain weight on him so that she could try to walk a straight line.

"Thanks," Sara smiled at her son and they both headed into the room. Sara freshened up while Kyle sat near the bathroom door making sure he could get in if she falls down. He felt like a grown up looking after a younger child. It made him laugh when he realized that he was actually looking after his mother. It was a new feeling, but somehow, he liked it. Soon enough, Sara dropped onto bed and Kyle laid next to her who started snoring the next minute.

Back at home, Catherine was welcoming the morning with open arms. The whole night had been too long, from avoiding Nick to solving a hate crime, it had not been her best night. She was tired and she just wanted to go home, talk to Sara and get some sleep. She smiled when she realized just how soothing the thought of talking to Sara felt in her mind. So she grabbed her things from the locker and headed out.

"Hey Cath," Warrick's voice came from behind making her groan. But she still managed to flash him a fake smile as she turned around.

"What's up Warrick?" She asked throwing her bag over her shoulder.

"I was just going to hand you the case file but looks like you're calling it an early day?" Warrick asked showing her the file.

"You can just put it on my table," Catherine straightened her hair with her fingers. "I'll check them tonight okay?"

"Sure," Warrick smiled with a nod. "Everything alright Cath?"

"Yeah," Catherine smiled. "I'll see you tonight Warrick."

"Okay," He smiled and watched Catherine turn around, walking out of the lab.

Catherine stepped into the house soon and saw that her mother has left and Lindsey has gone to school. She left her jacket and bag downstairs before heading up to her room, slowly undoing the buttons of her shirt. She threw the shirt on her bed as soon as she got into her room, flopping onto the bed with a loud sigh.

"Hey Cath," The voice came from the corner of the room startling her.

There stood Alan in his same cool guy pose giving her an analyzing look. Clearly, his eyes were focused on Catherine's half naked chest which made Catherine grab her shirt quickly covering herself.

"What the hell are you doing in my bedroom?" She asked holding her waist, feeling whether she left her gun downstairs. Thankfully it was still in the holster on her belt.

"I'm here to talk to you," Alan stepped slightly into the light.

"You're being a fucking creep Alan," Catherine spat angrily.

"Because you refuse to talk to me," Alan defended himself.

"I have a good enough reason to not want to talk to you," Catherine said apprehensively.

"If you give me a damn chance to talk to you, you might," Alan said in a tired manner. "Please."

"No, I need you to get out of my house right now Alan," Catherine pointed at the door which made Alan's face change from sincere to angry.

"What the fuck is the matter with you," Alan stepped forward making Catherine take a step back. "What happened to the woman I fell in love with? The one who believed that true loved deserved chances."

"You crushed her heart and walked all over it remember?" Catherine retorted. "Don't try to talk your way into this Alan. Get out. Or else…"

"Or else what huh?" Alan took hold of the shirt Catherine was holding to cover her chest and threw it aside. "You can do nothing to me." He grabbed Catherine's shoulder tightly hurting her.

"Let go of me Alan," Catherine pushed Alan but the man was stronger. She sighed knowing she had no other choice. "I'm warning you."

"Let it go Cath," Alan leaned his face closer to Catherine with a sneaky grin playing on his lips while his hands started to slowly move down. "You know you want me."

"Back off," Catherine said pulling off her gun and pointing it at Alan's stomach. "Now."

With a chuckle Alan took his hands off of Catherine and taking a few steps back. "Don't be stupid Cath, you know you can't shoot me."

"Don't test me," She loaded her gun with a glare at him. "Now get out before I do something I don't want to do."

"I will make you listen to me Cath," Alan turned around towards the door. "Next time…and I'll make sure you can't point a gun at me."

"GET OUT," Catherine screamed loudly.

"I'm going," Alan smiled. "I'll see you later."

"No you won't," Catherine spat just before Alan closed the door behind him.

Unable to trust the man, she slowly walked out of her room and went downstairs to make sure that he actually left the house. After she was 100% sure, she went back to her room and closed her bedroom door locking it. As soon as she locked the door, Catherine dropped the gun and dropped on her knees, breaking into tears. She covered her face with her hands and let her sobs fill the room.

When she was able to collect herself and take a breath normally, Catherine grabbed her phone and dialed Sara. But she wasn't answering. In between sobs, she called her again and again, desperate to hear the brunette's voice, but Sara's phone kept going to voicemail. Thinking that Sara was still sleeping it off, Catherine threw the phone on the bed and laid down on the floor, grabbing a pillow from the bed. Hoping to fall asleep, she closed her eyes imagining the good times that would come when Sara got home that evening.

It was close to afternoon. And back in San Francisco, Sara just walked out of the bathroom with the worst hangover she had had in a long time. Kyle was sitting on the bed going through his bags making sure he has got everything he needed.

"All done?" Sara asked grabbing her bag that was near the closet. Kyle nodded and closed his bags with a sigh. "We should get going."

"Okay," Kyle said quickly and followed Sara outside.

While Travis helped carry Kyle's bags, Sara went into the kitchen to see her phone laying on the counter. She checked the phone to see many calls from Catherine she had missed. She almost dialed the blonde but realizing that the calls came a few hours earlier and that Catherine would probably be sleeping at the time, Sara decided she would hold back. She grabbed a cup of coffee and sat down with a sigh. Involuntarily, she smiled realizing that she was going back home. Home which she used to dread going back to, but today home felt comforting. Home was where Catherine was.

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**They'll be together in the next chapter, i promise. Let me know what you thought.**

**Thanks for reading :)**


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

**First, so sorry for being MIA for so long. Studies and work kept me busy for longer than i thought. And after almost a month of blocking myself from the internet, i'm back. Thank you for all the reviews, they were very sweet. Hope you all like this chapter. **

**To my better half...you are the best. **

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1...review & ENJOY :)**

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"I don't feel so good," Kyle covered his face with the book he was reading and leaned back in the chair.

Sara took the boy's hand and squeezed it comfortingly since she knew exactly how he felt. Even she hated flying, maybe because she was claustrophobic. And being her son, Kyle probably was too. With Sara's touch, Kyle pulled the book off his face and turned his pale face towards his mother.

"Do you need some water?" She asked softly making Kyle nod.

Without letting go of Kyle's hand, Sara called for the attendant. A young, attractive blonde came to them within a few with a calming smile.

"Can I help you?" She asked Sara, checking her out unsubtly.

"Urm water?" Sara said uncomfortably seeing the look the girl was giving her. She never liked feeling so exposed in front of people, especially when she had nowhere to run. After a nod, the girl left making Kyle chuckle.

"What?" Sara asked curiously.

"She was checking you out," Kyle stated the obvious making Sara roll her eyes with a laugh.

"She wasn't," Sara defended herself rather than the girl.

"Yes she was," Kyle leaned forward in the chair putting the book on his lap. "Her eyes stopped right at your…" He grinned and pointed at his own chest with a snigger. "I think she really liked it."

"Okay, you have spent way too much time with Mia," Sara laughed at Kyle who grinned innocently.

Just then, the girl came back with water for Kyle he took appreciatively. To Sara's dismay, instead of leaving them alone, the girl knelt in front of them giving Kyle a good look.

"Is this your son?" She asked Sara who nodded with a smug smile. Kyle looked at Sara with a knowing grin making the brunette roll her eyes. "You don't look so good," She said patting Kyle's thigh.

"I don't like flying," Kyle scrunched his face.

"I think I have some jello back there, do you want some?" She asked cheerfully at which Kyle nodded. Again, she left them alone making Kyle turn to Sara with an evil looking smile.

"She's trying to get to you using me," He laughed.

"Oh please she is just being nice," Sara squinted her eyes at her son with a pout.

"Nope, Travis once told me that a way to a woman's heart is either through food or through their kids," Kyle shrugged. "So she's just working an angle."

"You spent too much time with those idiots," Sara laughed and ran her hand through her hair.

Too soon to Sara's liking, the girl came back and handed Kyle the jello which he devoured on happily. Again, the girl knelt in front of them and kept watching Kyle enjoy the treat. Then, she turned to Sara who pushed her back hard on her seat.

"Is this your first time to Vegas?" She asked softly.

"No, I live there," Sara shook her head uncomfortably.

"Yeah?" The girl looked quite excited about the piece of information. "It must be really cool to live in the 'Sin City'. What do you do there?" She asked again taking a good look at Sara's body. "I mean work wise." She added matching her eyes with Sara's again.

"I'm a criminalist," Sara answered shortly hoping that would be it.

"Ooooh that sounds fun," The girl said in a girlish tone which hurt Sara's eardrums. "So you must know a lot of place to have fun huh?" She said, clearly another meaning hidden behind her words.

"Well I know the places where bodies are easily found which ironically are the places where people go to have fun in Vegas actually," Sara said in a matter-of-fact tone making Kyle chuckle while the girl looked a bit beaten.

"Well you should let me know where I can go to have some fun," The girl acted as if she didn't hear what Sara had just said which annoyed the brunette a bit. She put her hand in the pocket on her vest and took out a piece of paper. "Call me sometime." She said standing up.

"Sure, when my girlfriend and I are free, will give you a call," Sara took the card with a mischievous smile. Sara's words finally replaced the girl's smile with a frown.

"Great," She mumbled before leaving Sara and Kyle alone.

As soon as the girl left Kyle started to laugh even though not audibly, making Sara frown with a smile.

"She was trying so hard," Kyle managed to say in between laughs. "You should have given her something."

"I did," Sara shrugged. "That's all I can offer right now."

"Are you saying you're in a serious relationship with Catherine?" Kyle asked enjoying his jello. He saw Sara furrow her eyebrows in thought before turning to him.

"I guess I am," She smiled a little.

"Good for you," Kyle said in a proud tone. Before he could say anything else, the captain announced that they would be landing soon making him get rid of the jello and put his seatbelt back on.

Sara grinned like a little girl and turned to the front, closing her eyes. And her mind slowly drifted off into neverland where Catherine resided for her at the moment.

While Sara was enjoying the thoughts in her mind, Catherine was having a hard time staying asleep. After being woken up by her own nightmares for the umpteenth time, she gave up and sat up on the floor. She checked whether her gun was still at the pillow where she left it before she got up from the floor and flopped back on the bed with a loud sigh. Just then, there was a knock on the door which made her get on her feet in milliseconds.

"Mom?" Lindsey poked her head from the doorway making Catherine kick her gun under the bed. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine," Catherine tried to smile normally but from the look on Lindsey's face, she knew she had failed.

"You were sleeping on the floor just now," Lindsey crossed her arms and leaned on the doorframe. "With your gun near your face. And you're saying you're okay?"

"I was just checking something on it. I must have dozed off before I put it back," Catherine pulled out a justification out of thin air. It sounded stupid even to her.

"Uh huh, sure," Lindsey frowned heavily with a sigh. "Look mom, I know we don't have the best mother-daughter relationship but I can damn well know when something is bothering you too much."

"I'll be okay," Catherine said softly. She didn't want to drag Lindsey into everything.

"Fine," Lindsey raised her hands tiredly. "Just talk to me before you snap and do something stupid. I'm just saying, it might help."

With that, she left the room closing the door behind her. Catherine stared at the door, her hands on her hips as her mind worked overtime. Filled with anger and tire, Catherine sat on the bed and buried her face in her hand. She had never felt this scared or helpless in a long time. And the fact that it was all because of Alan didn't help the matter one bit. Her mind slowly wandered to one of the times when she actually enjoyed being trapped in the man's arms.

_They were sitting on the floor of Catherine's bedroom, their bodies wrapped around the sheets trying to save themselves from the cold night. While Catherine leaned on Alan's chest, he kept his arms wrapped around her securing her in his arms. _

"_Can I ask you something?" Alan said in a hushed tone. Catherine nodded onto his chest making him rake his finger through her silky hair. "When we get married, do you want to have another child?"_

_The question made Catherine sit up and turn her head to face the man with a shocked smile. Alan just stared at her as serious as he could look yet the calming smile playing on his lips. _

"_You want children?" Catherine asked in a surprised tone. _

"_I'd love to have at least one child with you," Alan shrugged and pulled Catherine back into his arms. "Don't you?"_

"_I don't know, I have never thought about it," Catherine answered honestly feeling Alan's chin hit the top of her head telling her that he was nodding. "I mean I already have Lindsey so that thought never came to mind."_

"_I understand that," Alan said genuinely. "But wouldn't you want to have a child that was ours? Yours and mine?"_

"_I don't know," Catherine repeated her words after taking a while to think about it. "Maybe. I know I want to be with you and a child with you actually sounds really nice. But I still don't know for sure."_

"_That's good enough for now," Alan bent her head down kissing Catherine's exposed neck. "If we have a girl we're going to name her Alexandria."_

"_No freaking way," Catherine slapped the man's arms that were wrapped around her slip body. "This is not some Egyptian Library Al. Not Alexandria. No."_

"_Okay, we can decide when the time comes," Alan said turning Catherine's face towards him. "We have all the time in the world to decide our life. I'm not going anywhere."_

"_You better not," Catherine mumbled before Alan captures her lips in a searing kiss. _

Catherine's eyes jolted open with the memory to realize that tears were rolling down her cheeks and into her hands. Thinking it was stupid to cry over someone who left her for no reason, she wiped her face and laid back on the bed, hugging her pillow for dear life. But in her mind, she couldn't help but go through all the memories she had made with the man over and over again. She buried her face under the pillow and screamed into it hoping Lindsey wouldn't hear. When she felt like she could breathe again, she checked the clock to see that she still had some time to take a short nap before work. Putting her gun near her pillow again, she closed her eyes hoping to feel better when she woke up.

While Catherine tried to bury her worries by sleeping, Sara was at the baggage claim waiting for Kyle's last bag to come into view. She turned to her side to see the little boy looking around the airport while bobbing his head to the music he was listening to on Sara's iPod. She smiled and turn her head back to see Kyle's bag in view making her sigh in relief. She quickly grabbed the bag and put an arm around Kyle's shoulder, leading him towards the exit. Soon, they were heading to Sara's apartment in a cab since Sara's car was still with Nick.

"Can we go and see Catherine tonight?" Kyle asked while watching the Vegas streets out the window.

"Sure, I'll give her a call and see if it's alright," Sara said taking her phone from her jeans pocket.

"NO," Kyle said a bit loudly making Sara jump and drop her phone in the process. "Sorry," He added sheepishly at which Sara nodded sarcastically. "We can surprise her. It'll be fun."

"Okay," Sara raised a questionable eyebrow at Kyle who grinned innocently. "We can go after you take a shower."

"Awesome," Kyle said happily and turned back to enjoying the view.

Sara was quite amazed by how attached he was to Catherine. Maybe it was a good thing since Catherine was clearly a better mother than Sara could even imagine being. She sighed and turned her head to the streets taking in the familiar sights which made her smile. When they got to her apartment, it took a while to get everything upstairs since the elevator seemed to be broken. When Kyle stepped into the apartment, Sara saw a hint of relief and smile on his face which made her curious.

"What?" She asked curiously at which Kyle shook his head.

"I like it," Kyle took in the view of the apartment and threw his jacket on the couch. "Which one is my room?"

"That one," Sara pointed at the spare room.

As soon as she did that, Kyle hurried to the room making Sara follow him as curiously as before. Sara laughed when she stepped in the room to see Kyle cuddled into a ball on the bed hugging the pillows tightly.

"You need to shower before you sleep," Sara stated the obvious. But that only made Kyle snuggle into the bed more. "No no, come on let's go." Sara pulled the boy by the leg softly.

"But it's so comfortable," Kyle whined holding onto the bed frame.

"Do you want to go to Catherine's?" Sara raised an eyebrow which was strangely very mother-like. Kyle nodded sheepishly at which the brunette sniggered. "Then you need to take a shower first."

"Not cool," Kyle pointed a finger at Sara who headed out of the door. She turned her head once to see Kyle going through his bag to find probably his clothes and towel. With a sigh, Sara closed the door behind her and stepped into her own room.

The familiar smell and atmosphere washed over all her senses. She felt a sense of depression and relief overcome her. Her eyes caught the picture frame at her bedside table. She took the frame and ran her fingers over the picture of Lily, a soft smile dressing her lips.

"Take care of Lucille for me, won't you?" She whispered to the picture before taking a deep breath and putting the frame back on the table.

Sara sat down on her bed and stretched her body before resting her back on the bed. She closed her eyes, hoping she would rest for a few minutes before heading out again. Little did she know that she was too tired to just close her eyes. But before she could reach a comfortable, deep sleep, a soft hand patted on her stomach making her jolt her eyes open.

"I thought we were going to Catherine's," Kyle said with a slight pout.

With a chuckle, Sara got up and told him to wait in the living room while she got ready. Soon, they were heading to Catherine's house, Kyle looking quite excited as he watched the Vegas lights decorate the night. To Sara's surprise, she actually found herself looking forward to see the blonde again. It was a feeling she thought she'd never have, and she sighed in relief knowing she actually had someone in her life that made her feel that way again.

When the cab pulled over in front of Catherine's house, Kyle hurried out while Sara paid the fare. Without waiting for her, Kyle hurried up the pathway and stopped at the front door, turning his head to see where his mother was. Sara was lazing her way to the front door with a smile on her face. When she reached the little boy, his little fingers instantly reached the doorbell without any hesitant.

It took a while for someone to answer the door. Kyle hopped on his spot a little when he heard someone unlocking the door from the inside. The door slowly opened and a miniature Catherine popped her head into view.

"Hey….Sara?" Lindsey said stepping out into the view completely. "What's up? What are you doing here this late?"

"Has your mom left for work already?" Sara asked, the realization hitting her that Catherine actually had work.

"No, she's still sleeping," Lindsey leaned on the doorframe, her eyes fixated on the little boy who was giving her a scared look. "Who's this?" She turned to Sara who bit her lips.

"This is Kyle," She put her hand on Kyle's back. "My son."

To no surprise, Lindsey went into a complete state of shock, straightening herself with her eyes wide open.

"You have a son?" Lindsey asked Sara as the corner of her mouth twitched. "How come I have never seen him?"

"Because I used to live with my mom and dad in San Francisco," Kyle answered for Sara who scratched her head uncomfortably. "I was adopted by Sar's best friends." He added with a shrug.

"Oh," Lindsey turned to Kyle and a warm smile curved on her lips. "Okay, that's kinda cool." She said sounding very much like a teenager. "Are your mom and dad visiting with you too?"

Lindsey started talking to Kyle, completely ignoring Sara who frowned at the question. She looked at Kyle whose face dropped. Even Lindsey seemed to have noticed the change in the little boy's expression.

"No…" He said softly, looking down at the ground. Lindsey exchanged a worried look with Sara before turning back to Kyle. "Mom...well…she…di…urm she was in an accident. And dad's in the ICU."

"Oh…" Lindsey said, connecting the dots on her own. "I'm so sorry." She put her hand on Kyle's shoulder making the little boy finally look up.

An awkward silence filled around the three as they stood at the front door, with the cold air grazing their bodies.

"Kyle wanted to say hi to Catherine before we called it a night," Sara cleared her throat.

"Okay, I can wake her up," Lindsey nodded stepping into the house. "Come on in."

The three of them headed into the living room where the television was on and a bowl of popcorn sat on the table. Lindsey quickly paused the movie that was playing and turned to Sara.

"Look, I think something's wrong with mom," She said, her voice filled with concern. "I don't know how close you guys are but maybe she'll talk to you."

"Why do you think something's wrong with her?" Sara asked finding the piece of information very interesting.

"She thought Alan was in the house today," Lindsey said calmly before she frowned. "You do know who Alan is right?" She asked scratching her arm uncomfortably. When Sara nodded at her question, Lindsey sighed. "And she was sleeping on the floor with her gun at hand."

"Her gun?" Sara raised her eyebrows feeling a bit more curious at what was going on.

"Yeah, something is going on but she won't talk to me," Lindsey shrugged. "Maybe you should, before she does something stupid."

"Okay," Sara nodded and turned her head towards Catherine's room upstairs. She turned back to Kyle who was looking at her with worry in his deep brown eyes. "Honey, do you mind staying here with Linds while I see what's wrong with Cath?"

Kyle shook her head making Sara smile.

"Is that okay?" Sara turned to Lindsey who also smiled. She had not seen Lindsey smile in a long time, not since the girl went into the rebellious phase.

"Yeah we'll be fine here," Lindsey stepped next to Kyle and putt a hand around the boy who looked a bit embarrassed. "Right Kyle?"

The boy nodded shyly before he sat down on the couch with Lindsey who turned the movie back on. Assured that Kyle was fine, Sara headed upstairs and slowly opened Catherine's bedroom trying not to make a sound. But before she could take even a step into the room, Catherine sat up with a jolt and pointed her gun at her. Automatically, her hands rose in surrender.

"Shit Catherine," Sara closed the door carefully. "Put the gun down."

"Sara?" Catherine squinted her eyes making sure she was seeing right. When she was sure, she slowly put the gun down and quickly got off the bed, throwing herself on the brunette. "Thank God." She sighed onto Sara's shoulder.

Sara held the blonde tightly letting her calm down. She slowly broke the hug and looked into Catherine's blood shot eyes, cupping her face warmly.

"What's going on?" Sara asked with worry.

"It's…." Catherine tried to say but her voice broke.

"Don't say it's nothing," Sara cut her off before she could continue. "You surely haven't slept and you are ready to point the gun at anyone who comes through that door, something is going on." She summarized the situation.

"Alan's back," Catherine said after taking a few moments to gather herself. She gulped down loud enough for the whole house to hear.

"What?" Sara said a bit loudly than she expected. Whether she was scared for Catherine or worried that the relationship she had with Catherine was going to be jeopardized, she didn't know. She just knew her heart skipped a beat with Catherine's words.

Catherine took Sara's hand and lead her to the bed, sitting both of them down before she started to tell the story. She told Sara everything that had happened and the brunette's anger rose with every word that escaped Catherine's lips. When Catherine stopped talking, Sara was looking at the floor, her hands entwined with each other with a tight grip.

"Why didn't you tell me this before?" Sara turned to Catherine who was giving her a sad look.

"You were dealing with so much at the time," Catherine put a hand on Sara's back rubbing it softly. "And you were far away, what could you have done? I just didn't want to add into your worries."

"But you are my girlfriend now," Sara straightened herself, her words hitting both her and Catherine a bit unexpected. "You are supposed to tell me about stuff like this, even if I'm in my deathbed. I think I deserve to know it."

"I'm sorry, I guess I took the wrong choice here," Catherine turned away from Sara biting her lips.

"It's fine, I know you weren't able to think straight," Sara put an arm around Catherine's shoulder pulling her into her arms. "Don't worry, I'll stay with you. He won't come into the house again and if he does, he won't be walking out of here…maybe crawling…but that depends."

Her words actually put a smile on Catherine's face.

"I don't want to go to work tonight," Catherine mumbled onto Sara's chest wrapping her arms around the slim brunette.

"Call Nick and tell him you're not feeling well, he'll understand," Sara placed a kiss on Catherine's head. "You can get some sleep, I'll be here with you at all times."

Catherine lifted her head up and smiled. She pulled Sara's face to hers, claiming the brunette's lips to herself.

"Thanks," She mumbled onto Sara's lips who hummed in return.

"By the way, there's someone here to see you," Sara said when they broke away from the kiss.

"Kyle?" Catherine straightened herself and stood up from the bed. Sara nodded and watched while Catherine took her shirt off revealing her half naked body to her. "Let me call Nick first, change into something appropriate for a little boy, okay?"

"Sure," Sara leaned back on her arms taking in the sight of her beautiful girlfriend.

While Sara and Catherine were in the bedroom, Lindsey and Kyle were staring blankly at the television. Kyle wasn't paying much attention to what was going on. Little did he know that Lindsey was not paying any attention to it either. Her mind was filled with thoughts of losing her own father. She turned her head to the little boy who was leaning back on the couch, hugging the cushion while he stared at the television.

"How are you holding up?" She asked out of the blue making Kyle turn to face her. He managed to give her a weak smile.

"Honestly speaking, I don't know," Kyle frowned. He didn't like not knowing the answer to questions.

"I know how you feel," Lindsey turned to the television, pausing the movie again. "I lost my dad like that too."

Kyle looked at the sad expression on Lindsey's face, feeling bad for her.

"I'm sorry," Kyle said softly.

"It's okay, it was long ago," Lindsey turned to the boy with a soft smile.

"Does it ever go away?" Kyle asked after hesitating for a few seconds.

"What?" Lindsey asked.

"The feeling that you'll never have someone like him in your life ever again," Kyle cleared his question. "The feeling of being alone."

Lindsey bit her lips knowing the answer. But she didn't want to tell the boy that, he was too young. She didn't like the idea of Kyle going through the same sleepless nights, nightmares or have the same anger she had in her heart.

"It…" Lindsey started to talk but Kyle cut her off.

"Your silence answered it," Kyle smiled onto the cushion. "You were going to lie to me, weren't you?"

"You're smart for your age," Lindsey ruffled Kyle's hair playfully.

"So I've been told," Kyle shrugged.

"Hey, if you need anything or anyone to talk to, I'm always here," Lindsey put her hand on Kyle's shoulder. "I know you just met me, and hell I don't even know your age and you don't know me. But we do share one thing in common right?"

"Yeah," Kyle nodded with a smile. "Not the best thing to share is it?"

"Nope, but it's a start for a friendship?" Lindsey shrugged.

She didn't know why she was drawn to the boy. But all she knew that he had an expression that was too similar to what she used to have. She knew she didn't let her feelings lead her to anything good, but she had no one to turn to. Not that her mother was not around, but she believed that her mother could never be her friend when it came to the topic of her father. And she didn't want Kyle to have that. She wanted Kyle to know he had a friend, who understood everything he was going through. Maybe he even would be able to help her get out of the deep pit she was now starting to feel comfortable being buried in.

"Yeah it is," Kyle nodded and smiled at Lindsey. They were silent for a few seconds before Kyle spoke again. "Can I ask you something?"

Lindsey nodded warmly, turning her body towards the boy, putting her arm over the backrest of the armchair and crossing her legs.

"Are you close to Catherine?" He asked cautiously. He saw Lindsey sigh and look upstairs before she turned back to him.

"Not really," She said with a hint of guilt in her voice. "I guess I never tried."

"Why not?" Kyle asked turning to Lindsey as well.

"I don't know, mom and dad got separated when I was young," She explained her reasons. "I never liked the whole, switching from her to dad all the time deal. In a way I blamed them for it. And when dad died, I just aimed all my anger to her."

"You blamed her for all of it?" Kyle pushed trying to make Lindsey talk.

"I know it's not right and I do know it's not true either," Lindsey sighed. "I was alone you know? I never saw her much, she always had work. I'm even closer to my nana than her."

"But Catherine seems so nice," Kyle said softly. At this point he was starting to question his impression of Catherine.

"She is, she is a great mom," Lindsey said hurriedly. "But I am her daughter and I can be very demanding. She just wasn't able to fulfill all of my demands. That just made the anger in me grow than dial it down. It's not her fault either. I know all she does is for the best for me, working her ass off so she can give me all the crap I ask for."

Kyle kept nodding at everything Lindsey was saying. He got the impression that Lindsey hasn't spoken about this a lot because she was in a hurry to let it all out as if it was suffocating her.

"I just miss her a lot and she's never there," Lindsey shrugged with a smile. "So I turn to my friends, who I know aren't the best people to be around. But I feel as if they are all I have, you know?" She said to Kyle who nodded with understanding. "I guess after a while, I stopped trying to get close to her and when she tries, I just get annoyed. Plus I like to give her a hard time, that's the job of us as their children right?"

"Is that why you are in a rebellious phase?" Kyle asked with a mischievous smile.

"How the h…I mean how do you know that?" Lindsey tried not to say anything bad which made Kyle laugh. To Lindsey's surprise, the boy's laugh was infectious.

"It was a guess from some close observations," Kyle shrugged. "But the belly button ring kind of gave it away easily."

Lindsey looked down at her stomach to see her that her t-shirt has crept up a bit revealing her well toned stomach. She quickly pulled it down giving a worried look upstairs to make sure Catherine wasn't there.

"I'm guessing Catherine doesn't know about it?" Kyle raised a coy eyebrow at which Lindsey scowled.

"I just got it and she doesn't' need to know about it just yet," Lindsey said a bit smugly. "You're a lot like Sara huh?"

"People say that a lot," Kyle said softly. "But it's a proven fact that kids who feel neglected go through a major rebellious phase than normal teenagers. So I kind of knew without the belly button ring."

"Trust me, you'll go through it too," Lindsey chuckled feeling a lot at ease than a few minutes ago. "And you will drive Sara nuts, I'm sure."

"I doubt it," Kyle's eyes twinkled. "I've heard that Sara was a wild child back in her days so I think she can handle it."

"So was my mom but that doesn't stop her from being a 'mother', you now?" Lindsey chuckled. "It's in their nature, when they have a child, they worry that their kids are going to do everything they did when they were our age."

"They must have done a lot to be worried about us that much," Kyle grinned mischievously.

"Oh they have," Lindsey put her face closer to Kyle as if to whisper a secret. "Did you know my mom was a…."

But before she could complete her sentence, she heard the door open upstairs making her sit straight again.

"I'll tell you later," She winked at the boy who grinned with excitement.

He was surprised that he was getting along with Lindsey so well. And it was a relief knowing that he could talk to her anytime he wanted; at least he wasn't that alone. He had a mother, well two mothers and a friend, so for now he was quite alright.

Both Lindsey and Kyle turned to the stairs to see Sara and Catherine come down the stairs. Lindsey's eyes were focused on both women's hands that were entwined with each other.

"Hey," Lindsey whispered to Kyle. "Are these two dating?"

"Yeah," Kyle answered in the same whisper. "You didn't know?"

"Didn't have a clue," She whispered back. "Good for them though huh?" She winked.

"I guess so," Kyle shrugged with his whisper.

"What are you two whispering about?" Catherine's curious voice came from the bottom of the stairs making both Lindsey and Kyle give her identical innocent looks.

"Nothing," Both of them said at the same time which made them exchange a smile and a look of understanding between each other.

"Okay?" Catherine said giving Sara a worried look. The brunette had a curious look on her face as they stepped to the couch.

"Hey Catherine," Kyle stood up with a smile.

"Hey buddy," Catherine pulled him into a hug looking at Lindsey who actually had a smile on her face. But as soon as she realized her mother was looking at her, she forced her smile to fade. "How are you?" She pulled away from the hug and asked Kyle.

"I'm okay," Kyle said with a smile. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine," Catherine smiled and gave Sara a smile before turning back to Kyle.

"Aren't you going to work? You're going to be late," Lindsey asked, stretching her legs on the couch making herself comfortable.

"I called in sick tonight," Catherine said to her daughter.

"That's new," Lindsey shared a mischievous smile with Kyle.

"You two are getting along well," Sara crossed her arms, noticing the subtle exchange between the two 'kids'.

"I guess," Kyle said in his normal soft tone and turned to Catherine. "I just wanted to say hi to you when we got here."

"That's very sweet," Catherine patted on his cheek. "Hey do you mind staying here tonight?"

"No I'm okay with it as long as Sara is," He turned to Sara who smiled.

"Good, I'll make the guest room for you then," Catherine ran her hand over Kyle's head before heading to the room.

"I'll help her," Sara said after staring at Catherine's back for a few seconds.

"Of course," Kyle grinned and turned to Lindsey when Sara hurried after her girlfriend.

"5 bucks say they make out on the bed before you get to sleep on it," Lindsey laughed heartily.

"Oh I don't need to know that," Kyle frowned. "Man I have to sleep in this shirt." He slouched his shoulder looking down at his clothes.

"Come on, I'll give you a t-shirt I've grown out of," Lindsey jumped out of the couch and lead Kyle upstairs.

"It's not a girly color right?" Kyle asked curiously making Lindsey laugh again.

"You're just going to sleep in it, it's not like anyone's going to see," She pointed it out to Kyle who scowled.

"Still," He pushed stubbornly.

"Don't worry, not everything I own is nauseatingly pink," She grinned leading him into her bedroom.

As the four of them in Catherine's house went their own ways to get ready to sleep, none of them knew they were being watched from far away. Sitting in front of three monitors, Alan gripped on the can of beer he was holding, bending the metal in his fist.

"A woman!" He gritted his teeth watching the now empty living room through the monitor. "You replaced me with a WOMAN!"

He screamed throwing the can at the adjacent wall.

"You'll pay for this Cath," He said running a finger over the picture frame next to his keyboard. "So will she…."

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**Thats it for now, hopefully i'll update a lot sooner. Let me know what you think, reviews does help write faster :)**

**Thanks for reading.**


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

**I know it's late but it's a good break for me to update in less than 2 months at the least...so here you go. Sorry for any mistakes there might be...Thank you for the lovely reviews, made me smile. **

**To my love, couldn't have asked for anyone better than you**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1...ENJOY**

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Kyle sat up on the bed, sweat breaking from his forehead and with uncontrollable breathing. He held the sheets tightly as he closed his eyes and tried to brush the images in his head away. He looked at the clock on the bed stand to see that it was only 4 am. That meant he had only gotten 2 hours of sleep filled with recollections of bits and pieces of the accident that made it feel like he hasn't gotten any sleep at all. He looked around the dark room wishing he was not alone in the bed. He was scared, not scared of the dark but that something else was going to happen which would unravel everything in his life again.

Deciding to get a glass of water, he slowly got out of bed and stepped into the living room. When he walked into the kitchen, a surprise was waiting for him.

"Hey," Lindsey said in a croaky voice.

"Hi," Kyle nodded and opened the refrigerator.

"You couldn't sleep either?" Lindsey asked softly without taking her eyes off the boy who grabbed a water bottle and glass before he sat down in front of her.

"Just some bad dreams," Kyle mumbled before taking a sip of water.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Lindsey asked cautiously.

"What good will that do?" Kyle shrugged.

"True," Lindsey nodded taking another piece of pear from the plate in front of her.

They sat in silence, the clinking of glass and crunching of fruits filling around them. Soft sighs escaped both their lips as they got engrossed in their own thoughts.

"Hey…" Lindsey finally broke the silence making Kyle look up, his eyes blood shot. "Why don't you stay with me? It might help you get some sleep."

Kyle stared at Lindsey who gave him a soft smile. She had the same look Sara has whenever she looks at Mia, the one his father has when he looks at his Uncle. The caring look a sibling gives the other. He always wondered how it would be like if he had a younger sister or brother, he thought of how he would protect them and make their life a living hell at the same time. He smiled with a nod realizing somehow his wish has been granted in the form of an older sister.

"Come on," Lindsey put the plate into the sink before placing a soft pat on Kyle's back. "If the people upstairs wake up, we'll be in trouble for staying up past our bed time."

With a chuckle, Kyle followed Lindsey up the stairs and into her room. As soon as he stepped into the room, he rolled his eyes around at the amount of pink and purple color that hit his eyes.

"Why do girls like pink so much?" Kyle scoffed at Lindsey who literally jumped onto her bed.

"I'll give you one piece of advice," She made herself comfortable on the bed. "Never try to answer some questions when it comes to girls, like why they like the color pink."

"Okay," Kyle raised an eyebrow with a smile before sitting down on the very comfortable bed.

"You really need to get some sleep," Lindsey pointed out the obvious, closing her eyes at the same time. "Don't worry, I won't go anywhere." She opened one eye giving the boy a smile.

With a nod, Kyle laid down and closed his eyes. He sighed with relief when he heard Lindsey humming a tune under her breath, making him drift off into a deep sleep easily.

It was almost 8 in the morning when Sara finally opened her eyes. She didn't even know why she felt so tired even after a good night's sleep. Since she didn't feel like getting up, she snuggled deeper into Catherine's side, tightening her grip on the older woman who was still sleeping soundly with her arms wrapped around Sara. But before Sara could fall back asleep, an annoying noise woke her up. And before she could respond to it, she was being thrown off of Catherine by the blonde sitting up like she just woke up from a nightmare.

"Cath, it's just the alarm," Sara mumbled rubbing her eyes sleepily. She looked at Catherine who despite Sara's words looked around the room as if trying to find something she has lost.

"Oh," She finally said when she was sure that no one else was in the room. "Wow it's early," She groaned before dropping back on the bed while Sara sat up, leaning on the headboard.

"Yeah, maybe you should go back to sleep," Sara stretched her body with a yawn.

"No, I doubt I can fall asleep now," Catherine said laying back down, resting her head on Sara's arm, wrapping herself around Sara's body.

"Do you want me to make you some breakfast?" Sara ran her fingers down Catherine's hair, caressing the back of her neck.

"Really?" Catherine lifted her head with a smirk.

"Is it that impossible to believe that I can cook?" Sara rolled her eyes sarcastically.

"I wouldn't have guessed that before actually knowing you," Catherine rested her head back down, placing a kiss on the side of Sara's breast. "But now, you're a whole different person and I really like it."

"Awe, you're sweet early in the morning," Sara chuckled receiving a soft slap on her stomach. "How about you step into the shower and I'll go wake up Lindsey and Kyle for breakfast?"

"Sounds good to me," Catherine lifted her upper body, cracking her spine.

When Sara sat up to get off the bed, Catherine pulled the brunette by the collar making both of them drop back on the bed with Catherine on the bottom. Their lips met for a second before Sara pulled away and looked straight into the blue eyes in front of her. With a smile, she kissed the blonde again, her hand running down Catherine's sides, pushing her hand underneath her tank top.

"You're not going to be able to make breakfast if you keep up," Catherine hummed onto Sara's lips, running her hand up and down Sara's arm.

"That's not a problem," Sara licked Catherine's lip, pushing her hand up Catherine's stomach her fingers teasing her nipple slowly. "Is it?"

"God no," Catherine bit her lips. She pushed Sara onto her back, straddling the brunette's hips. She smirked when Sara's eyes grew wide when she slowly pulled her tank top off her body before kissing the brunette again.

It was almost an hour later when Sara stepped into the kitchen to make breakfast while Catherine took a shower. It took her a while to find everything she needed and to get everything ready before she decided to go and wake up Kyle.

Wiping her hands with a paper towel, she stepped into the living room to have her attention grabbed by the picture of Catherine and Alan in the cupboard. She tilted her head looking at the man's face, as if trying to study every inch of the man's face. With a frown, she put the frame down so that it was not the first thing she always saw when she walked into the room. Not liking the hint of jealousy she was feeling, she headed to Kyle's room and knocked softly. When there was no answer, she opened the door with a soft creak to step into an empty room.

Her instincts kicked in naturally. Fear engulfed every sense in her and the first thing that came to mind was that Alan had been in the house and he did something to her son. She checked the whole room from the closet to under the bed before she started calling out his name. Scared out of her mind, Sara ran up the stairs and into Catherine's room where the blonde was standing in front of the mirror straightening her hair.

"Kyle's not in his room," Sara was out of breath when she spoke. She bent down trying to catch her breath while Catherine's face changed.

"WHAT?" Fear struck Catherine as well. "He's not in the kitchen or the bathroom?"

"No, I checked the bathroom," Sara shook her head, grabbing her hair tightly.

"Is Lindsey gone too?" Catherine hurried out of the door, running to her daughter's bedroom with her heart beating faster than it has in a long time.

As soon as she opened the door, her face relaxed and a soft chuckle escaped her lips. She turned to Sara who was slowly pacing back and forth in front of the bedroom door.

"Sweetheart, did you check this room?" Catherine asked pointing into the girl's bedroom.

With a frown, Sara hurried to the door and peeked in, her fear disappearing completely. Lindsey was laying on her back, with her legs under the cover and her hand around Kyle's shoulder while the boy laid on his stomach with his head on Lindsey's stomach. Both of them looked very peaceful sleeping soundly.

"Fuck, it didn't even occur to me to check Lindsey's room," Sara slapped her forehead, annoyed at her stupidity.

"It's okay," Catherine rubbed Sara's bicep before closing the door slowly trying not to make any sound to wake up the kids. "It's the mother in you, she won't let you think straight when she thinks something happened to her child."

"That has never happened to me before," Sara leaned on the wall and Catherine stepped in front of her, putting her hands on Sara's shoulders.

"It did when you heard Kyle was in the accident too right?" Catherine asked softly at which Sara nodded. "You're a mom now Sara. It happens, you're allowed to get scared."

"It's so new to me," Sara shook her head biting her lips. "Feeling so strongly towards my own blood, I have never had that with my own family even," And then she matched Catherine's eyes. "I don't like feeling jealous either."

"Jealous?" Catherine tilted her head, pushing her body against the brunette.

"I don't like Alan, not one bit," Sara frowned.

"Awe, baby I understand that," Catherine smiled shyly. "He has become a creep, you are allowed not to like him."

"I never felt jealous in any relationship before," Sara shrugged. "Other than with Lily, but that I thought came with me being protective of her."

"Aren't you protective of me?" Catherine raised an eyebrow.

"Since you were engaged to a fucking creepy stalker, yes I am feeling very protective of you right now," Sara ran a finger down Catherine's neck.

"Hey he was a really nice guy," Catherine slapped on Sara's shoulder softly. "It's not my fault he has an ego the size of the Atlantic Ocean."

"True," Sara shrugged in agreement. "Do you want to help me make breakfast?"

"I would love to sit on the counter and watch you," Catherine grinned cheekily.

"That should be enough," Sara placed a peck on Catherine's lips before taking her hand and leading them both downstairs to the kitchen.

True to her words, all Catherine was sit on the counter watching her in an intrigued manner.

"You're staring," Sara said while mixing the pancake mix.

"You look very sexy when you're all domestic," Catherine grinned throwing a grape in her mouth.

"Funny," Sara stepped between Catherine's legs and brushed her finger over the blonde's nose with a mischievous grin.

"HEY," Catherine said realizing what Sara has done. "That's sticky." She brushed a finger over her nose, wiping the mix off of her nose.

"You didn't get all of it," Sara grinned again. "Here," She pulled Catherine close to her and wrapped her lips around the tip of Catherine's nose, licking the mix off of her skin. "There, all gone." She whispered onto the blonde's lips.

"There's some here too," Catherine ran her tongue over Sara's bottom lip before crushing their lips together.

Catherine wrapped her legs around Sara's waist making the brunette pull her to the edge of the counter, her hands running up to Catherine's breast slowly.

"Uhhhhh hummm, you guys do know that there's a kid in the house?" Lindsey's voice came from the doorway making Sara jump away from Catherine who adjusted herself on the counter.

"Urm…" Catherine hummed avoiding eye contact with her daughter while Sara gave a scared look to Catherine.

Lindsey looked from Sara to Catherine and back to Sara, grinning at the fact that both women looked like teenagers caught in the act. She bit her tongue from making any jokes and leaned on the table, crossing her arms across her stomach.

"Are you two blushing?" Lindsey pointed out with a cheeky grin making their faces even redder than before. "It's okay, Kyle already told me you guys are dating."

"Oh," Sara and Catherine chorused together.

"You should have just told me mom," Lindsey said grabbing a glass from the table. "It's not like I didn't know you played for both teams."

"Well, it all happened really fast," Catherine scratched the back of her head. "I was going to tell you."

"It's okay," Lindsey shrugged pouring herself some water. "I'm really happy for you guys." She said genuinely at which Sara and Catherine exchanged a confused look. "I'm serious. You guys make a good couple." She rolled her eyes.

With that, she headed to the door.

"Is Kyle up?" Sara asked at which Lindsey turned around and shook her head.

"He didn't get much sleep, so I thought maybe we can let him sleep in?" Lindsey suggested. "It's a Saturday anyway."

"Sure," Sara nodded, pushing her hands into the back pocket of her pants. "Do you want some breakfast?"

"I'll eat with Kyle," Lindsey smiled and hurried out of the kitchen leaving the two women alone.

"She seems to like Kyle," Sara turned to Catherine who jumped off the counter.

"It's good, she doesn't normally bond with kids," Catherine grinned grabbing the pancake mix.

"I thought I was making breakfast," Sara wrapped her arms around Catherine from the back.

"I decided I'll help," Catherine said leading them both to the stove.

With a soft okay, Sara followed Catherine, annoying her here and there while the blonde finished making breakfast. While Sara had pancake mix on her face and shirt at the end of it, Catherine's hair was wet from the water Sara kept splashing at her. For a minute, both of them felt like they were kids who just started off in a relationship and for once, they felt as if they both needed that.

After freshening up and a change of clothes, both women sat down to enjoy breakfast together. They sat at the table eating their food while talking about everything and anything before they sat on the couch with Catherine flipping the channels to watch something. Sara was surprised when the blonde stopped at the Discovery Channel and snuggled into her.

While Sara watched the Discovery Channel, Catherine slowly fell asleep holding onto Sara for dear life. Playing with Catherine's hair slowly, Sara looked down at the blonde peacefully sleeping in her arms. She smiled as she placed a quick kiss on Catherine's temple. She had a mixture of fear and happiness as she felt Catherine's breath on her skin.

"I could really fall in love with you," Sara whispered, tugging on Catherine with a sigh.

Just then she heard footsteps from the staircase making her turn her head making sure that she didn't disturb Catherine who was sleeping very peacefully. Kyle was walking down the stairs, rubbing his eyes while Lindsey followed behind him with her eyes half closed.

"Morning Sar," Kyle yawned as soon as his feet hit the floor.

"Morning kiddo, did you get some sleep?" Sara said in a hushed tone at which Kyle raised his eyebrow.

"Yeah, I slept okay once I crashed with Linds," Kyle pointed at Lindsey who smiled smugly. "Is Catherine okay?"

"Yeah she's just taking a nap," Sara smiled placing another kiss on Catherine's forehead, suddenly realizing that she has been doing that a lot. "Breakfast on the table if you're hungry."

"Come on buddy, I'll heat it up for us," Lindsey put an arm around Kyle's shoulder and led them to the kitchen.

Sara sighed at the sight of both the children walking into the kitchen, with Lindsey messing up Kyle's hair and the boy trying to get away from the girl. With a smile, Sara turned back to Catherine who had her eyes open, looking at the same sight Sara was looking at.

"I thought you were sleeping," Sara caressed Catherine's hair.

"I was, their voices woke me up," Catherine straightened up and stretched her muscles.

"Urm hey, I was thinking," Sara caught Catherine's attention. "If you don't mind, do you mind helping me find me a new place?"

"You're moving?" Catherine asked with a smile, crossing her legs comfortably.

"I'm not sure," Sara started to ramble. "I mean Kyle said my apartment's okay but I think it'll be better if he grew up in a house rather than some sort of bachelorette pad."

"Oh so that's your bachelorette pad huh?" Catherine licked her lips coyly making Sara scowl.

"You know what I mean," Sara smiled shyly. "But I'm not too good in noticing what a child would find homey. But I figured you are good at that so I thought I'll ask you," Sara went on rambling, unable to stop herself. "That's if you don't mind helping me out, I'm okay if you can't even, I mean you are busy and…"

Before Sara could continue her ramble, Catherine pressed her lips against hers, kissing her softly.

"You don't know how to ask people for help do you?" Catherine mumbled onto Sara's lips.

"Not really," Sara shrugged while Catherine sat back down on the couch with an amused smile on her lips. "I'm just not used to it."

"I'd love to help you sweetie," Catherine took Sara's hand into hers, entwining their fingers together. "My sister's in real estate, I'll call her and we'll see if you can get a good deal, okay?"

"Okay," Sara smiled widely feeling like a little kid who had been promised candy.

"You're so cute," Catherine grinned and pulled herself closer to the brunette, pulling her by the collar into a searing kiss.

Sara leaned back on the couch letting Catherine comfortably lay on top of her. Sara's hands rubbed Catherine's back underneath her clothes as their tongues caressed each other passionately.

"I'll say again, there's a kid in the house," Lindsey appeared from the kitchen with a glass of juice in her hand with Kyle right behind her.

As soon as her voice hit their ears, Catherine jumped off of Sara and sat at the edge of the couch while Sara sat up and gave the young girl a sheepish smile. Kyle grinned, taking a sip off his glass of milk before he sat down on the empty chair nearby. Lindsey however leaned at the doorframe, enjoying the embarrassed looks on both women's faces.

"That was fast," Catherine said to Lindsey who shrugged and jumped on the table next to her.

"We eat fast," Kyle answered for Lindsey at which Sara chuckled. "I got it from Sara and I think Lindsey got it from you." He added in a matter-of-fact tone.

"I don't eat that fast," Catherine defended herself with a fake scowl.

"Oh yes you do mom," Lindsey helped prove Kyle's point which Sara found amusing. But as soon as Catherine turned to her, she wiped the smile off her face.

"Do I eat really fast?" She asked Sara who shook her head in answer. "Honestly…" Catherine added with a frown.

"You don't eat faster than me," Sara shrugged. "But I kind of do eat really quickly, so I think so do you."

"It's not healthy for you," Kyle nodded his head, more to himself than to anyone else in the room. "When we eat too fast, it's harder for the digestive system to function properly which results in indigestion and heartburn too," Everyone in the room stared at him with identical smiles on their lips as the boy went on about the facts stored in his head. "And since there's poor indigestion that means the body can't absorb the necessary nutrients leading to a weak immune system which means the body is exposed to illness more easily." He finished his ramble and looked up from his glass of milk. He gulped down when he saw that everyone was staring at him. "And people tend to overeat too which means you're going to get fat." He added with a smile.

"Thank you Einstein," Lindsey raised her glass in a sarcastic manner making Kyle scowl.

"Einstein was a physicist, I don't think he put much contribution into Biology," Kyle pulled his tongue out at Lindsey who laughed.

"Okay, Jimmy Neutron it is then," Lindsey laughed making Catherine and Sara chuckle.

"That's fine Barbie," Kyle smiled and went on with his milk making Lindsey call out a 'hey' at him.

"Okay okay, before we get into a war of name calling, can we come up with something to do today?" Catherine raised her hands before Lindsey could retort back.

"I don't mind staying at home," Kyle said simply.

"Yeah I agree," Lindsey put the glass on the table, stretching with a loud yawn. "I'm too lazy to do anything today."

Catherine exchanged a look with Sara at which the brunette shrugged. Rolling her eyes at how good Sara was with words at the moment, she turned back to Kyle who was now sporting a milk mustache making her laugh.

"Honey, got milk?" Catherine chuckled running her finger over her lips.

"What?" Kyle asked confusedly.

"You have a mustache boy genius," Lindsey jumped off the table with a grin making Kyle wipe it off quickly.

"What's got milk?" Kyle asked Catherine just when the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it," Lindsey said making Catherine turn back to Kyle, explaining the slogan, which the boy found quite amusing.

Catherine turned her head to the doorway when she heard Lindsey walk back in. The sight made her jump to her feet quickly, Sara following her suit instantly.

"Hello Cath," Alan tilted his head with a smile.

He was standing behind Lindsey who's face had gone pale and looked scared out of her wits. Catherine felt Sara step next to her making her turn her head to see pure loathing and anger on the younger woman's face.

"What are you doing here?" Catherine asked between gritted teeth, turning back to the man who was staring not at her, but Sara. Both of them looked as if they would kill each other with their thumb if they could.

"Now that's now the way to greet the one who holds your daughter's life in your hands is it?" He stepped slightly to the side, the gun pressed against Lindsey's side coming into view.

Catherine gasped while Sara's eyes grew wide as her mind went into overdrive into trying to find options to turn the situation around to her advantage. Kyle slowly stepped next to Sara, grabbing his mother's shirt from the back, fear overwhelming all his senses. His eyes found Lindsey's which were filled with fear as she tried to keep the tears from rolling down her cheeks.

"Alan, what are you doing?" Catherine took a step forward her body visibly shaking. "Don't point that at her, what has she ever done to you?"

"Nothing, I love Lindsey," He ran his hand over Lindsey's hair making the girl try to get away from his grip but he put an arm on her shoulder stopping her. "I had to resort to this because of you."

"Let her go," Sara finally spoke, her voice was extremely low which sounded nothing like Sara.

The brunette took a step forward, stepping in front of Catherine making the blonde gulp down loudly. Her body was shaking with fear, her hands sweating badly, tears involuntarily escaping her eyes as she watched her daughter helpless next to Alan.

"And who might you be?" Alan tilted his head like a maniac with a warm smile.

"It doesn't matter who I am," Sara snapped angrily. "She's just a little girl, let her go."

"Well you might want to talk a bit nicely to the man who's holding a gun to your precious girlfriend's daughter," Alan smiled knowingly making Sara frown.

"How the hell do you know that?" Catherine stepped next to Sara, her voice shaking as she spoke. "Have you been spying on me?"

"Don't give yourself too much credit," Alan snapped at Catherine making Sara even angrier. "It's called being well informed."

"You creep," Catherine said, unable to help herself. "Let my daughter go Alan."

"I think we're done with all the name callings," Alan said stepping forward, pulling Lindsey with him. "Hey little boy, come here." He pointed at Kyle who went white.

"No," Sara put a hand on Kyle's chest keeping him where he was. "You're not touching my son."

"See now you need to understand that I have the upper hand here," Alan said taking the gun and pressing the end against the side of Lindsey's neck making the girl close her eyes. Catherine put a hand over her mouth while Sara groaned angrily. "Now, Kyle right?" Alan turned back to the little boy who nodded feverishly. "Good, I caught that right. Come here big guy."

Kyle looked up at Sara who was squinting her eyes so badly at Alan that he wondered if she was trying to kill him by just glaring at him. He slowly stepped forward, two feet from Lindsey who gave him a worried, sympathetic look behind her tears.

"Here take this," Alan pulled out a piece of rope from his back pocket, giving it to Kyle. "You need to tie Lindsey's hands for me, got it? To the back, hurry now."

"Well you came prepared," Kyle rolled his eyes at the man who smiled.

"I'll give you a handy piece of advice big guy," Alan said to Kyle who stepped behind Lindsey, tying her hands together. "You need to prepare for anything that happens in life, or else you're going to get fucked by people like Catherine over there."

"You left me Alan, stop talking to a little boy like that," Catherine pointed out, tired of pointing out the obvious to the man who seem to be giving her a deaf ear. "And will you please put the gun away?" She added, her heart thumping painfully in her chest as she had no idea how to get Lindsey out of the situation.

"But I came back for you," Alan said to the blonde, quirking the gun against Lindsey's skin making the girl gasp with every move. "Couldn't you have waited for me rather than going out on a fishing trip for a new person?" Alan turned to Sara who was still glaring at him, helpless to the situation. "And you had to replace me with a woman, do you know how insulting that is?"

"You and your fucking ego," Sara groaned angrily at which Alan laughed. He turned to Kyle who finished tying the knot carefully not to hurt Lindsey.

"Let's see," Alan ignored Sara and tugged on the knot making sure it wasn't loose, his gun now pointing at the back of Kyle which made Sara's heart skip a beat. "Good job, are you in the scouts or something?"

"No, I have common sense though," Kyle said sarcastically at the man, looking straight at Sara, the corner of his lips quivering as he tried not to smile.

"You're a smart mouth aren't you?" Alan patted on Kyle's head making Sara scream inside, her nails digging into her nail as she quenched her fists angrily. "Well let's see how good your mother is at tying knots, shall we?" He took another piece of rope and gave it to Kyle and turned to Sara who raised her eyebrows angrily. "Come on, let's see your skills on him."

"No," Sara retorted angrily while Alan moved behind Lindsey again.

"It's that or Lindsey's life," He put the gun to the back of the girl's head making Lindsey flinch and Catherine's knees feel weak.

"What the hell happened to you?" Lindsey finally spoke between sobs.

"Your mother made me," Alan spat spitefully.

Sara looked at Catherine who couldn't take her eyes off of her daughter and turned back to Kyle who looked at her in a calming manner. When Sara stepped forward, Alan pulled Lindsey a few feet behind Kyle who handed the piece of rope to his mother. Sara ran her hand down the back of Kyle's head before taking the piece of rope and tying the boy's hand behind him, making sure it wasn't too tight to hurt him.

"Sorry kiddo," Sara whispered to the boy who shook his head trying to calm his mother.

"Alright, back to your place you go," Alan waved the gun at Sara when she turned to face him making her angrier than before. The man checked the knot and smiled at Sara's work as he stood behind the two children who were not helpless than before.

"Now, let's get this party started, shall we?" Alan grimaced making all the color in Catherine's face drain out and Sara's heart skip a beat.

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**I didn't want to end this chapter here but I still have some facts to straighten out before I can completely finish the situation here, but I decided to give you guys an update without having to wait too long...ideas would be great...since I have part of the next chapter written down, I'll probably be able to update earlier...**

**Thanks for reading...**


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

**I'm proud of myself for updating so soon...frankly, didnt think i could do it. Thanks for the reviews, and sorry for ending with a cliff hanger before. ****Thanks Nic, you helped a lot in writing this chapter...love u**

**WARNING: There is abuse in this chapter so I'm letting you know now, physical, sexual and verbal abuse...all in there. Consider yourself warned. **

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1...ENJOY**

* * *

Sara tried to close her eyes and think but her mind was on over drive knowing that her son's life was in danger. Her palms hurt from digging her nails into them as she tried not to do anything stupid to cost any child's life. Her heart skipped a beat as the door slammed behind her. She tried to look back but the gun pressed to the back of her neck kept her from doing so.

They were standing outside Lindsey's room now, Catherine a few feet in front of Sara her sobs filling the hallway. Lindsey and Kyle were now locked inside the girl's room. Last Sara saw, they were sitting on the floor near the bed with their legs tied together and their mouths covered as well by their own mothers. Sara hated a lot of people but the feeling she had towards Alan was now beyond just hatred, it was much more than that. She wanted to hurt him bad, and she knew that if she got the chance she will not stop.

"Now that the kids are taken care of," Alan's voice hit Sara's ear like a thunder bolt, electrifying every vein in her. "Let's go to your room Cath." He called to the blonde who took a step forward weakly.

Sara could only see the back of Catherine's head, her shoulders slouched, her head dropped and her hands wrapped around herself, hugging herself gently. Sara stood at her spot watching the blonde slowly walk towards her room when the cold steel of the gun touched the back of her neck, pushing her forward.

"Walk," Alan spat angrily.

He put a hand on her back which made her skin crawl as she stepped behind the blonde and into the room. Catherine turned around on her heels, her eyes locking with Sara's, pleading filled in her deep blues. Sara tilted her head with a trembling try to smile at which Catherine's sobs increased.

"Cath, on your back on the bed," Alan instructed simply at which Catherine glared at the man.

"Why?" It was Sara who spoke, not liking where this was going.

"Because I said so," Alan bent down and pressed the side of his face on Sara's, making the brunette pull her face away from him. "Come on love, no time to lose." He said to Catherine, wrapping an arm around Sara's waist which made Sara wish that the man would drop dead in any painful manner.

Without breaking eye contact with Sara, Catherine sat down on the bed, pulling herself up so that she was leaning on the headboard, hugging her knees tightly. She watched as Alan pulled out another piece of rope from his pocket, hoping it was the last. She couldn't help but wonder how everything came down to this; her whole family in danger.

"Now, you," Alan's voice snapped Catherine out of her thoughts. The man had his hands wrapped around Sara's neck, the piece of rope caressing the brunette's skin. "Get on top of her, tie her hands to the headboard."

"Don't you have internet?" Sara spat angrily, pushing the man's hand away. "Porn is free these days."

"Shut up and do as I say," He put his hand around her neck again, pressing on her airway, making her cough a little.

"Don't hurt her," Catherine's voice was weak but she couldn't help herself. "Sar, do what he wants, please." She added pleadingly, finding the anger in Sara's eyes.

"You might want to listen to your little love bunny there," Alan ran his hand down Sara's neck to her chest making Sara grit her teeth in disgust.

"Fine," She retorted between her teeth and grabbed the piece of rope.

As Sara stepped to the bed, she felt the man following her closely, the gun probably still pointed to the back of her head. But she didn't care, all she saw was the scared woman in bed in front of her, who held a piece of her heart in her hand. Sara slowly got onto the bed next to Catherine, the end of the gun again hitting the back of head, confirming her assumptions. She took Catherine's hand into hers, lacing their fingers together before pulling it up while the blonde put up her other hand herself.

"I'm sorry," Catherine whispered to the brunette who looked into her eyes while her hands tied the blonde's hand to the piece of wood.

"It's not your fault," Sara said in a soft whisper herself. "I'll get us out of this, don't worry." She added in a confident tone.

"Enough talk," Alan said pushing the gun harder onto Sara making the brunette close her eyes for a second before she looked back at Catherine.

When Sara put her hands down from the knot, Alan tugged on it to make sure it held.

"Good," He pushed the gun harder on to the back of her head. "No, let's see you take off her clothes. Straddle her first."

"Seriously, get internet," Sara turned her head to have the gun point straight to the mid of her forehead.

"Top first," Alan corked his head with a smile. "You can leave the top at her hand, no need to rip off a pretty piece of clothing."

Slowly, Sara straddled the blonde's hips, with the gun pointing to the side of her head. She ran her hands down Catherine's sides before pushing her hands underneath the thin piece of clothing, push the t-shirt up the blonde's curvy body revealing more skin than she wanted to in front of Alan. She pulled the t-shirt off of Catherine up to her arm, leaving it wrapped around her wrist neatly. Catherine was breathing heavily, her chest rising up and down flaunting her chest involuntarily.

Sara turned to Alan who gestured her towards Catherine's bra making her roll her eyes. Caressing Catherine's flesh slightly, she ran a hand to the blonde's back, unhooking the bra letting her breasts free.

"Take the straps off," Alan instructed smugly.

Her hands trembling slightly, Sara unhooked the straps from the cup, taking the bra off of the blonde's body to reveal her firm breasts.

"Very nice," Sara heard Alan lick his lips making her disgusted at the situation.

Catherine had her eyes closed shut as she tried to ignore the sensations Sara was sending by caressing her flesh softly.

"Okay now your turn Sara," Alan said with a hint of a chuckle making Sara snap her neck towards the man in disbelief. Catherine opened her eyes and glared at the man angrily.

"No, she has nothing to do with this Alan," Catherine pointed out at which the man shrugged.

"She's dating you, she is a huge part of all of this," He said simply. "Now come on, let's see you take off your top. Hurry now, we don't have all day."

Sara turned to Catherine who looked at her in the most sympathetic manner. Memories hitting her like a brick, Sara slowly pulled her t-shirt off of her body and threw it on the bed making sure not to break eye contact with Catherine which was the only thing that was keeping her from breaking down. Her hands shaking visibly, she unhooked her bra with one hand letting it fall on top of Catherine who couldn't help but take a look at Sara's exposed flesh.

"Hmm…now that's a nice body you got there," Alan ran the gun down the side of Sara's face to her neck down to her chest to the side of her breast.

Sara closed her eyes and gritted her teeth, feeling Catherine squirm underneath her.

"Now take off her shorts," Alan pushed the gun to the side of Sara's breast harshly.

"What's your motive here anyway?" Sara turned around without obeying his instructions.

"You're going to help me," He said simply.

"Help you?" Sara glared at the man in disbelief.

"You'll see eventually," Alan shrugged with a grin. "Now, take off the rest of her clothing."

She felt the gun push right above her breast making her take a deep breath and move down the blonde's body, pulling her shorts down in the process. Catherine put her legs together automatically when Sara pushed her finger underneath her panties, pulling them down as slowly as she could.

"Isn't that a sight," Alan said taking in Catherine's naked body. "I always loved her body, so sexy."

"You're a fucking jackass," Sara said straddling Catherine again in the hopes of somewhat covering the blonde.

"Kiss her," Alan said simply.

"What?" Catherine and Sara said at the same time.

"You heard me," Alan grimaced making Sara scowl and Catherine utter something in disbelief. "Or else, one or both of you die, leaving your kids as orphans. You don't want that now do you?" He added with pride at his leverage.

Biting her lips, Sara turned back to Catherine who tilted her head and closed her eyes. If the situation was right, this was one thing Catherine would enjoy immensely but at the moment, all she felt was disgust and used by a man she once called a fiancé.

Sara slowly bent down and kissed Catherine softly who reciprocated a little. Sara's one hand cupped the blonde's face while they kissed softly.

"Take your hand to her breast," Alan said again making Sara groan onto Catherine's lips.

She moved her hand down to the blonde's breast making Catherine automatically heave her chest a little with the contact. Against her will, she felt the heat between her legs start to grow making her hate herself.

"Now take it down to between her legs," Alan tilted his head when Sara dropped her head helplessly while her hand slithered down to Catherine's core. She tried not to move her hand so that it won't be uneasy for the blonde. She was slightly surprised to feel the slight moisture between the blonde's legs.

"See, you're going to help me by getting her nice and wet for me," Alan said in a sleazy tone making Sara groan angrily onto Catherine's lips again.

"I'm so sorry," Sara mumbled as she tried not to move her finger yet failing.

"It's okay," Catherine said taking a sharp intake of breath with every slight movement of Sara's finger tips.

Alan took his time enjoying the interaction between the two of them, the gun still pointed at Sara's head making sure the brunette followed everything he told her to do. When he was satisfied of the 'foreplay', the man grabbed Sara by the elbow and pulled her out of the bed making her lose balance slightly. Involuntarily, Catherine pulled on the knot that was surprisingly tight which made it impossible for her to move her upper body without hurting herself.

"Alan, do not hurt her," Catherine called angrily at which Alan gave her a mocking look. "Please, this isn't her fault."

"But it is yours," Alan said pressing his body against Sara's back, his arm wrapping around the brunette's waist again, changing the position of his gun to the side of her neck. "So this is your punishment."

The man's hand ran up Sara's exposed stomach to her chest making Sara's reflexes kick in automatically. She pushed the man back with her hand and turned around, punching the man hard on the cheek. She threw her leg to kick him on the knee but he stepped to the side avoiding her, throwing a fist onto her nose breaking it with one punch. Sara felt blood drip to her lips but without caring she threw another punch at the man but he grabbed her by the wrist stopping her. Sara groaned with pain when Alan twisted her wrist and punched her stomach with the gun.

With an insane smile, he grabbed the back of Sara's hair while the brunette grabbed the man's hand trying to rid of the gun that was firm in his hand.

"Fuck you bitch," Alan spat angrily before he turned both of them around, still with a firm hold on Sara's hair.

Angrily, the man threw the brunette against the adjacent wall, her head hitting the concrete loudly once.

"ALAN," Catherine screamed in agony.

Sara felt something run down the side of her face as she tried to get out of the man's grip but her head was literally spinning at the moment with the hard hit it took to the wall. To her glee, the man hit her head on the wall again before he let her go. Sara turned around trying to get one more hit at the man but her knees gave away and she hit the ground. She was dizzy and her vision was coming in and out of focus angering her more. Sara saw the man kneel in front of her, grabbing her hair again, making her look up at him.

"Do you think you can make her happy the way I did?" Alan retorted at Sara who grabbed his shirt. But the man pushed her hand away easily since her strength was slowly draining out of her.

"You're an insult to human being," Sara spat, blood escaping through her lips.

"You can never make her smile the way I did," Alan put their faces together making Sara's anger rise with every second. "Or satisfy her sexually the way I did. What can a woman do? I'll show you how she likes to be fucked."

"No," Sara tried to push herself up but the man pushed her back down by her neck onto her stomach, putting a knee on her back harshly hitting the mid of her spine, paralyzing her slightly.

Her whole body ached as the man put her hands together, tying her wrists together. She looked up to see Catherine struggle to get out of her restraints calling out something that was inaudible to her. Before she could focus on what Catherine was saying, she felt herself being pulled up by the man towards the dressing table nearby. He grabbed her hands and lifted them up, tying them to the leg of the table to make sure she couldn't go anywhere. She pulled on the restraints making Alan laugh.

"You can see the show nicely from here," He squeezed Sara cheeks tightly before she shook her head, getting out of his grip. "You're going to like this." He patted on Sara's cheek before he stood up, pulling his t-shirt off his body.

"Fuck you," Sara spat angrily, coughing again.

"So tell me, have you ever had a man fuck you before?" He knelt down in front of Sara again who's heart skipped a beat at the memories. "What am I saying, of course you have. How else did that bastard child come into this world right?"

"Don't talk about my son like that," Sara tried to throw her upper body at the man but her hands tied to the table stopped her.

"Was it consensual? Or did you piss off someone else's fiancé that he took revenge?" Alan ran his hand down Sara's stomach pulling on her short slightly.

"Don't touch me," Sara said genuinely scared as the situation was gravely familiar.

"Alan, this is not her fault," Catherine said quickly, knowing how scared Sara would be at the moment. "I was the one asked her out. She didn't want to go out with me in the first place." She said making Sara snap her neck towards the blonde.

"Cath, stop talking," Sara said with difficulty knowing what Catherine was doing. As much as she was scared, she didn't want Catherine to go through anything like she had.

"Oh baby, do you want me to take you that bad that you're going to lie for this bitch?" Alan hummed, squeezing Sara's neck painfully choking her before standing up. "Okay I'll give you what you want then."

"No…" Catherine crawled up, pressing her back against the headboard, her body shaking with fear.

"Ah come on baby," Alan put the gun on the nightstand and sat down on the bed, putting a hand on Catherine's stomach. "You liked being tied up for me." He leaned down, kissing Catherine's collarbone making the blonde push back more.

"You prick, get off of me," Catherine tried to push the man away with her feet.

"You're giving me mixed signals here Cath," Alan ran circles on the blonde's exposed stomach. "You lie to have me come to you when I touch her, but when I'm touching you, you have a problem?"

"Neither of us want you to touch either one of us you clueless asshole," Sara said as she tried to close her eyes and regain some strength in her body.

"You know what Cath, you should have listened to me," Alan ignored Sara and put his hand on her legs putting them down. "This wouldn't have gotten to this if you listened to me." He pecked on Catherine's cheek making her turn her face away.

"Why should I have listened to you?" Catherine tried to move away from the man. "You wanted me to listen to you after you left me without any notice. And then you come back and you do this," Catherine spat while the man put his hand on her thigh, caressing them harshly. "You left me with nothing," The blonde moved her legs trying to brush the man's hand away.

"But I came back for you, you could have just let me talk to you you," Alan corked his head, placing his lips on Catherine's neck making the blonde look away trying to break the contact. "We were good, I just wanted you to understand why I left." His voice became hoarse as his lips caressed up and down Catherine's neck.

"Get off me Alan," She backed away again.

"I won't walk out on you again Cath," The man cupped her face kissing her while she pursed her lips. "I just need you to give me a chance to let you trust me again."

"Oh you have got to be kidding me," Sara's weak voice came from the floor before Catherine spoke.

"TRUST?" Catherine screamed angrily turning her head away from the man. "Are you freaking kidding me?"

"I never wanted to walk out on you, I needed to breathe," Alan straightened up looking from Sara to Catherine, stopping at the blonde who was still looking away from him. He put a hand on her head, running his hand down her hair. "I just needed to see everything in the right perspective. Why do you think I came back if I wanted to leave you alone anyway?"

"But you did leave me," Catherine said without looking at the man. "Without even a word."

"You would have changed my mind," Alan got closer to Catherine, putting two fingers under her chin, turning her face to him. "We would have gotten married and the feelings I had would have hit me when we were married. Would you rather have had me walk out then?"

"Hey jackass, it's called a freaking relationship. You don't decide it yourself," Sara called coughing from the floor.

"Shut up bitch," Alan spat at Sara who smiled at him insanely.

"Alan, get out of here," Catherine retorted angrily. "Don't do this."

"Can't you see the fact that I came back for you because I love you?" Alan turned back to Catherine, straddling the woman's legs, trapping her underneath him. "I want to give us another chance but you are being the typical woman, focusing on the crap in front of you rather than the free ground in front of us. Stop being a fucking pain and listen to me."

"Oh nice way to put it genius," Sara laughed again making Alan angrier.

"You need to give me a chance because we were fucking great together," Alan ignored Sara and squeezed Catherine's cheeks. Sara's anger rose at the blurry image she was seeing in front of her.

"It's not like you don't want me. You love being with me," Alan continued, corking his head onto Catherine's neck, his lips brushing against her skin.

"Yes you hate me because I left but you can't deny that you are glad I'm back in your life. I am your perfect other, not that bitch there." He turned Catherine's head towards Sara who gave her a weak look as she tried to keep her eyes open.

"I trust her Alan, I don't trust you," Catherine retorted angrily. She shook her head trying to get his grip off of her cheeks.

"You know Cath, you think that you want me to leave just because I hurt you," Alan ran his hand over Catherine cheek down to her chest. "But you really want me here, you really like me touching you. You just don't see it." His hand went lower grabbing her breasts.

"Stop it," Catherine pushed back more.

"But I'll show you just how much you want it," Alan trapped Catherine's nipples between his fingers. "And I'll show that bitch just how much you like a man."

"Come on, get OFF OF ME," Catherine squirmed underneath the man who ignored her completely and went on with his business. "You are scaring me, please stop it."

"GET OFF OF HER!" Sara screamed with all the might she had in her.

"Shut up," Alan turned to Sara with a smirk. "This is just getting started."

"I will kill you," Sara gritted her teeth, tugging on her restraints.

"Get off Alan," Catherine turned her body to the side trying to make the man fall off balance.

"You know Cath, you think just anyone will take your attitude the way I did," Alan's hand ran down Catherine's naked breast running his fingers from one nipple to the other.

"But no other man will let you flirt with every man around you, wear those exposing dresses you wear." He filled his hands with her breast again making Catherine close her eyes with disgust.

"Please don't do this," Catherine pleaded, tears rolling down her cheek.

"These were just for me," He grabbed both of her breast, kneading on them harshly, hurting Catherine at the same time. "But you teased all men with those cleavage shirts and tight fitted dresses."

"Please…" Catherine cried into the room.

"Don't touch her," Sara screamed pulling on her restraints making a perfume bottle on the dresser fall on her head increasing her dizziness.

"She can never touch you like this," Alan ran his thumbs over Catherine's nipples making the woman squirm with disgust. "She can never fuck you the way I do."

Sara tried to keep her breathing steady as she started to get the focus back on her vision and the feeling on her back again

"You're going to want to see this," Alan said to Sara unbuckling his belt hoarsely. His eyes met with Sara's slared at him with pure loathing.

"Alan, please, think of the good times we had, please," Catherine pleaded, pulling her legs towards her chest as the man unzipped his pants. "Don't do this."

"You were the one who couldn't think of it," Alan grabbed Catherine's ankle straightening her legs while she tried to hit him with her legs. "But you couldn't. So I'll show you."

Alan said laying down on top of Catherine who closed her eyes and turned her head away from the man as he spread her legs with extreme difficulty. Sara screamed pleadingly at the man to stop doing that to Catherine, helpless due to her restraints. And that one cry that escaped Catherine's lips broke Sara's heart.

While Alan put on his 'show' in the bedroom, Kyle was trying to sit up without falling down while Lindsey softly sobbed into the room. With the help of the bedpost nearby, the boy finally sat up just when they heard a loud thud from the master bedroom. Lindsey looked at the door with fear while Kyle slowly slithered up the bed and sat on it.

Lindsey looked at the boy in a confused manner as he started to breath in and out deeply. He made her gasp when he lifted his arms from the back all the way to his front, a painful groan emitting his lips onto the clothing that covered his mouth. He quickly pulled the piece of clothing down his mouth, his breathing irregular and tears rolling down his cheek. He turned to Lindsey who was giving him a shocked look.

"I'm double jointed," He said with a deep breath. "I didn't think I could still do that, but I think I popped my shoulder in the process."

He said before starting to chew on the knot, trying to break himself free, ignoring the pain on his shoulders. After a few minutes of struggle, the boy freed his hand and ankle and ran to Lindsey. He took the piece of clothing off of her mouth and untied her hand.

"Get the phone," Lindsey said in a whisper pushing the boy to the nightstand as she untied the knot on her ankle.

Kyle brought the phone to Lindsey who quickly dialed a number from her heart. She paced around the room while Kyle put his ear on the door trying to hear anything but failing miserably.

"NICK," Lindsey said loudly before toning her voice down. "It's Lindsey, you have to come here, now." She said starting to sob uncontrollably.

Kyle stood at the door thinking of what to do while he watched Lindsey explain the situation to Nick in between sobs.

Unaware of what was going in the other bedroom, Alan was enjoying himself very much, even though he was struggling to keep the blonde from moving her legs to get him off of her. He held the blonde down by her chest making it harder for her to breath, holding down her thigh with the other hand. Catherine still struggled helplessly to get out of the man's weight as his hips rocked back and forth against her pelvis. She turned her head painfully to Sara who was laying helplessly on the floor, her head turned away from the scene.

_Please God make this stop. _Catherine closed her eyes and thought to herself as the pain increased with every second.

Suddenly, there was a loud cracking sound which made Catherine open her eyes to see Sara kneeling next to the dressing table which was now crooked to a side. The look in her eyes scared even Catherine as she grabbed the end of the broken piece of wood which a few seconds ago held the table straight. She felt Alan stir on top of her, trying to get to his gun after seeing the brunette's fierce eyes. Knowing Sara had lost blood and her head was probably fuzzy, Catherine locked her legs around the man's waist and turned her hips, stumbling the man off balance to the other side of the bed.

Swaying slightly, Sara stepped next to the bed and wiped the blood off of her lips before she hit the man with the piece of wood the first time. Catherine quickly crawled up to the headboard to get away from the brunette who seemed to have lost control.

Catherine watched helplessly as Alan got hold of the piece of wood and threw Sara to the ground again before trying to get off the bed and pull his pants up. But somehow, Sara got up faster and hit the man on the head with extreme force that blood spattered across the bed, including Catherine's legs. Alan fell onto the ground and Sara knelt down, one knee on his stomach while the other trembled with her weight. But she didn't care.

"You worthless, piece of useless excuse to human fucking being," Sara retorted loud and angrily as she kept hitting the man even though he laid unconscious on the floor.

"Sara stop," Catherine said, scared of what the brunette might have done.

But Sara didn't stop. The blonde's pleads went deaf to her ear as she kept hitting every inch of the man's body she could reach. Just then, the door was thrown open with a kick and Brass was standing at the doorway, his gun pointed at the room with two other policemen and Nick standing behind him, their guns drawn too.

As soon as Brass saw the scene, he hurried to Sara taking his jacket off and throwing it on her back. Once she was slightly covered, he tried to get the brunette off of an unconscious Alan but failed. While the other policemen helped Brass get Sara off of Alan, Nick grabbed the sheet on the bed and covered Catherine's exposed body carefully.

Catherine saw Kyle and Lindsey step into the room slowly, Lindsey's eye falling on her mother while Kyle stared speechlessly at his mother who was extremely out of control. Two policemen were holding her by her elbows while Brass had his hand on her chest, telling her to calm down.

"Sara," Kyle called in a trembling voice, hoping for his mother to regain her senses.

Sara turned to Kyle, tears dampening her face and anger in her eyes making her whole face red. She saw the little boy giving her a scared look which made her finally take a breath. She turned her head to Catherine who was staring at her with tear filled eyes while Nick carefully undid the knot that held her captive.

"Call the paramedics," Brass knelt down next to Alan and checked his pulse. "Tell them to hurry." He added giving the man a worried look.

With a nod, one policemen grabbed his talkie and stepped out of the room while Nick stepped to Sara with slight hesitant in him.

"Can I undo the knot now?" He asked warmly making Sara nod, not taking her eyes off of Catherine who grabbed onto the sheets tightly.

As soon as Nick untied the knot, Sara let go of the broken leg of the table letting it fall on the floor, wrapping the jacket on her back around her body to cover herself up. Her body felt weak as her vision started to get blurry. She leaned on the wall and wiped her face to see that she was still bleeding.

Just then, three new people stepped into the room, Ecklie being one of them. The other two men sported the Crime Lab jackets and were holding their kits, waiting for the green light.

"What are you doing here?" Brass stepped forward claiming control of the situation.

"This is a day's case," Ecklie stated authoritatively making Nick step next to Brass.

"No, grave's taking this case," He stated stubbornly.

"You are too emotionally involved in this case," Ecklie pointed out the obvious.

"You're damn right we are," Nick said angrily. "These two are family, and we deserve to be the ones to nail that bastard for what he did, you know that."

"Nick I understand your position," Ecklie tried to sound compassionate making Nick roll his eyes.

"Then you know we are taking this case," nick said in an 'it's-official' manner. Ecklie exchanged a look with Brass who stood ground with Nick making him roll his eyes.

"Fine, let grave handle this," He said to the two men who nodded and walked out of the door with him following them closely.

"I'll go get my kit from the car," Nick said to Brass who nodded when the paramedics entered the room.

Brass turned around to look at a confusing scene. Sara was now sitting on the floor holding her head while Catherine sat on the bed holding onto the sheets and the two kids stood at the doorway probably wondering what to do next.

"I'll leave you guys for a minute," Brass said softly, gesturing the remaining policemen to follow him out.

When Brass closed the door behind him, Sara looked up at Catherine who slowly got out of bed, careful not to get in the way of the paramedics who were attending to Alan. She knelt in front of Sara who matched her eyes.

"I'm so sorry," Sara said genuinely. She put a hand on Catherine's cheek that had claw marks made by Alan.

"It's not your fault," Catherine put a hand on Sara's knee. "You did all you could." She assured her.

"I should have been able to keep that from happening," Sara shook her head.

"Sara, you…" Catherine spoke but her voice started to fade.

With that, Sara felt a nasty headache reach down to the back of her neck to the whole of her left side. Everything faded to black and the last thing she heard was a faded voice calling out her name.

* * *

There were annoying beeping noises in her head. Her mouth felt dry and every limb in her body felt heavy. Slowly, Sara opened her eyes to have a bright light shine right to her eyes.

"God," She groaned, closing her eyes shut again.

"Hey," A warm voice came from the side of her making her turn her head and squint her eyes open again.

A blurry outline of a woman made her blink her eyes a few times to focus her vision. It was Catherine, sporting a hospital gown and sitting on the bed next to which she was lying on. Sara tried to sit up but a pain shot through her spine making her lay back down. She turned around to see that she was in the hospital, hooked to machines that were making those annoying beeping noises. Her left hand wrist was wrapped up with bandage and she was sure there was something on her face, probably helping to heal her broken nose.

"How are you feeling?" Catherine's voice made her turn her head again.

"Okay I guess," Sara rubbed her forehead which was also wrapped by bandages. "How are you?"

"I've been better," Catherine said stepping off the bed and leaning on Sara's bed.

"Why are you in a hospital gown?" Sara asked trying to recollect the horrific day they all have had.

"They had to process me," Catherine reminded her. "And take the SAE kit."

"Oh right," Sara slapped her forehead softly. "Sorry." She added making Catherine shake her head with a weary smile.

"Nick's still at the house, Greg and Warrick are there too," Catherine passed on the information to the brunette who nodded.

"By the way, how did Nick know?" Sara asked curiously.

"Your son is double jointed, did you know that?" Catherine said with a small smile. "He has a bone bruise on his shoulder because of it but he will be okay."

"Really? And his arm just healed, poor thing," Sara scratched her chin in thought. "Well that explains how they got free then."

"Yeah, my sister took Kyle and Lindsey to her place, after they were processed too," Catherine explained, sitting next to Sara. "Alan's in ICU, they think he will make it through."

"Good, bastard deserves what's coming to him," Sara said in an angry tone. With extreme difficulty, she slowly lifted her body up to a seating position, taking Catherine's hand into hers. "Are you going to be okay?"

"Hmmm," Catherine nodded, biting her lips. "I so didn't see this coming."

"No one did, who knew he was such a creep," Sara squeezed Catherine's hand.

"Thank you," Catherine said, tilting her head in an adorable banner.

"For what?" Sara asked clueless to what Catherine was talking about.

"What you did, in your state," Catherine shrugged. "You had two bad cuts to your head, you had a concussion, you had lost quite a lot of blood, you had a broken nose, he hit you to the gut, your spine was bruised but you still managed to fight him off to that state. That is the most anyone has ever done for me."

"Anyone would have done that for you sweetie," Sara pointed out, lacing their fingers together.

"Not just anyone," Catherine argued. "It takes a lot to find that much strength for someone else. At least it does to find the strength to break a dressing table." She added with a humble chuckle.

"I'll replace it," Sara said in a teasing manner. "Hey, I'll do anything to protect you, I just wish I could have done that before he…well…I'm sorry, I really am."

"Don't be," Catherine cupped Sara's face with one hand. "It wasn't your fault. And you saved me from something that could have gotten so much worse. So don't beat yourself up, I'll always be grateful for what you did and what you took for me."

"I'm still sorry…" Sara said softly.

The blonde looked at Sara who was giving her a sympathetic yet warm look making her genuinely smile. Slowly, she laid down next to Sara, putting her head on her bicep and snuggling into her. Sara wrapped her arms around her girlfriend, holding her close.

A nurse came by just then to check on Sara, giving them a warm smile.

"Ms. Willows, the doctor said you can be discharged now," She informed Catherine who nodded appreciatively.

"Thanks," She said softly. "Can I take care of that in a minute?" She asked the nurse cautiously.

"Of course," The nurse smiled, checked the IV drip on Sara and left them alone, closing the blinds around the bed.

The two laid on the bed in silent, the noises of the hospital surrounding them. Sara kept running her fingers up and down Catherine's arm while the blonde held onto Sara's gown tightly.

"You know…." Catherine finally lifted her head up, locking their eyes together. "I think I can fall in love with you too."

* * *

**Thanks for reading...**

**Drop in a review, would love to hear what you thought about the chapter coz I havent written something like this before...thanks :)**


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

**Sorry for the long absence, life can in between. But thank you for the reviews, and thank you for being patient with me too. Hope you guys like the update, even though I know its not too much. Sorry for any mistakes in there.  
**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1...ENJOY**

* * *

Sara opened her eyes groggily. It seemed as if it was the next morning but she wasn't sure. She rubbed her eyes wearily, sitting up on the bed. Sure enough, she was alone in the bed, her bed covered by the blinds. A soft cough escaped her lips before her hands reached for the water glass on the stand nearby.

"Morning Ms. Sidle," A nurse opened the blinds and stepped in, a warm smile playing on her lips.

Sara managed to give her a soft smile before the girl turned to her chart.

"Urm….what time is it?" Sara asked in a croaky voice.

"It's going to be noon soon," The nurse answered warmly. "I take it you slept well?"

"Morphine always helps," Sara sat up and sighed appreciatively.

"So I have heard," The nurse chuckled. "You have some visitors outside. They didn't want to wake you up. I'll let them know you're awake."

"Thanks," Sara smiled with a nod adjusting the bed accordingly.

She wiped her face and tried to straighten her hair but her limbs ached. She tried to move up on the bed but her legs wouldn't move. She threw the sheets that covered her in fear looking down at her legs. Fanatically, she hit her leg hard trying to sense a feeling on it to have pain rush down to her feet. Never had she been so glad to feel pain before.

"Thank god," Sara sighed and dropped her head back on the pillow.

Just then, a head poked through the blinds with a smile on his lips. Sara smiled at the sight of her son who hurried to his mother side and gave her a hug, jumping onto the bed at the same time. She saw Catherine and Lindsey stepped next to her bed at the same time, identical smiles on their lips.

"What happened to your sheets?" Catherine asked throwing the cloth back over the brunette's legs covering her from the cold.

"I was checking something," Sara said pulling away from the hug, letting Kyle sit next to her on the bed. His arm was in a sling probably because of his shoulder. "How's your arm?"

"It's okay, I don't see the reason for it anyway," Kyle shrugged at which Lindsey rolled her eyes.

"You heal fast but you're not wolverine either you know," Lindsey pointed out at which Kyle pulled his tongue out at her.

"Well, you're my hero so thank you," Sara brushed her hand over Kyle's hair messing up his long wavy hair.

"What's a son for?" Kyle shrugged.

Sara's eyes met Catherine's who was giving her a look she couldn't really understand. There was sadness in her eyes, yet a smile on her lips that tried to cover it. Lindsey looked from her mother to Sara, both sharing an intense look. Kyle seemed to be ignorant to the silent conversation between the two women probably because he was just a kid or because he was just happy to see his mother in good health.

"Hey Kyle, let's go get some gello from the cafeteria," Lindsey said deciding to give the two women some space.

"Okay," Kyle grinned and pulled over, placing a kiss on Sara's cheek before jumping off the bed.

Lindsey took the little boy's hand and led him out, closing the blinds behind her. Catherine watched the two children walk out and jumped slightly when she felt Sara's hand touch her arm. Sara quickly withdrew her hand seeing the blonde flinch. Catherine quickly wiped the fear from her face and tried to smile at the woman who was giving her a worried look.

"Did you sleep okay?" She asked leaning on the bed and taking Sara's hand into hers.

"Yeah," Sara answered shortly. "Did you get some sleep?"

"Sort of," Catherine shrugged, not wanting to lie to Sara. "Nick said they will release the crime scene tomorrow. So I was wondering if I could stay at your place until then?"

"Of course," Sara said, slightly confused. "Where's Lindsey staying?" She asked slowly.

"She can stay over at Nancy's," Catherine sat down on the bed. "I just don't want to answer my sister's every question anymore. I can't stand that for another night." She shook her head trying to keep herself from tearing up.

"Okay okay," Sara squeezed her hand tightly. "You can stay with me as long as you want."

"Thanks," Catherine smiled, biting her lips gently.

Before Sara or Catherine could say anything, a nurse walked in with a chart in her hands.

"Sorry to interrupt," She said scanning the environment she stepped into. "The doctor has signed your discharged papers. You're okay to go home."

"Thanks," Sara nodded.

"I'll leave the papers here," The nurse said handing it to Catherine who smiled appreciatively.

With a smile, the nurse left, leaving the two women alone again. Catherine read through the papers silently while Sara tilted her head watching the blonde's lips move slowly as she read. She knew the look on Catherine's eyes, it was the same she had when she was a little girl and for a long time after she grew up. The look she had when her soul was being slowly torn by disgust.

"Cath…" Sara's voice was low as she tried to find something to say. She stared at the side of the blonde who avoided eye contact with her, but Sara knew that she was listening to her. "Why won't you look at me?"

For an answer, Catherine shook her head, her grip on the papers visibly tightening.

"Hey…" Sara repeated her name, not knowing what else to say.

"I can't," Catherine said in a shaky voice.

"Why not?" Sara's voice was filled with confusion.

"How can you look at me the same way after what you saw?" Catherine said with a sniff, still not looking at Sara.

"Urm because it's not your fault and because I know how that feels like," Sara said simply. "When I told you about how I got pregnant with Kyle, I trusted you to not look at me differently even after you heard about it."

"That was different," Catherine shook her head again. "You saw it, he made you watch."

"Cath, I don't see you any differently," Sara tried to catch a glance of the blonde's face but she turned away. "It wasn't your fault and I don't see why we have to drift apart because of it."

"How can you look at me?" Catherine turned her head, her eyes filled with tears and her face going red as she spoke. "How can you even touch me after all that?"

"Because you didn't ask for it Cath," Sara said warmly. "I know how you feel right now, I have been there, more than once so please trust me that I still see you the same. Hell I see you even more wonderful than before. You've gone through so much and you're still standing."

Catherine didn't say anything but looked at Sara with a frown. The words 'more than once' seems to have made her mind boggle.

"What do you mean?" Catherine asked, referring to the words in her mind.

"I mean I like you even more," Sara shrugged. "You're one of the bravest people I know and I'm so proud to be the one whom everyone knows as your girlfriend."

"No," Catherine shook her head. "More than once?" She repeated Sara's words bringing a surprised look to Sara's voice.

Sara didn't reply but just looked at Catherine, raising her eyebrows and biting her lips in anxiety. She felt Catherine's hands on hers, entwining their fingers together.

"Is there something you haven't told me?" Catherine asked softly, trying not to sound accusatory towards the brunette.

"I…urm…I just…" Sara stammered uncontrollably.

"Is it about your childhood?" Catherine asked remembering Sara telling her that she couldn't talk about it yet. Sara nodded making Catherine's heart skip a beat. "You can't tell me about it yet can you?" Catherine asked softly.

"Can we talk about it when we get home?" Sara said after a few seconds of consideration. "I don't want to do this here."

"Okay," Catherine nodded and tried to smile, failing again.

"Cath, I don't see you any differently," Sara pointed out when Catherine took her hand away and stood up from the bed. "I would never see you differently, you're still the same person. Someone I really like, a wonderful mother and a great friend. That will never change, I hope you know that."

"Thanks," Catherine smiled, this time her smile reaching her eyes slightly. She bent over and placed a soft peck on Sara's lips before straightening up. "Why don't you take care of these papers and I'll go get the nurse so that we can get you out of here, okay?"

"Sure," Sara nodded and took the papers from Catherine who disappeared behind the blinds quickly.

_This is so not going to be my day. _Sara thought as she went through the papers, thinking about her past which she was going to reveal to Catherine, probably in a few hours. _Fuck. _She thought in frustration, repeating those words in her head over and over.

* * *

Sara stepped into her house, one arm around Catherine's neck while Kyle and Lindsey followed them closely behind. Catherine helped her sit down on the couch and Lindsey and Kyle hurried to the kitchen to put the groceries they had bought on the way to the fridge before the ice cream melt.

"Lay down," Catherine said in a stern voice making Sara chuckle. "I'm serious, the doctor says you took a lot to your spine, you need to rest."

"Yes ma'am," Sara gave a salute and laid down with a mischievous grin making Catherine scowl.

"Hey mom, can we stay here until we get the house back?" Lindsey called from the kitchen door, unwrapping a chocolate bar.

"Urm…I don't know honey," Catherine scratched the back of her neck throwing a questioning look at Sara.

"I don't have a problem as long as you don't mind sharing a room with Kyle," Sara lifted her upper body enough to be visible to Lindsey.

"Awesome," Lindsey jumped on her spot and went back into the kitchen.

Catherine put a hand on Sara's chest softly pushing her back onto the couch. She sat down next to the brunette and tilted her head in awe.

"You don't mind her staying here?" Catherine asked trying to be sure.

"Yeah, I can't go to work for a while so it will be nice to have some company around," Sara shrugged and grabbed the pillow, hugging it tight.

"I can't believe I have to go to work tonight," Catherine sat down on the coffee table. "I don't think I can take all those looks they give me."

"I'm sorry," Sara gave a sad look at Catherine who tilted her head with a smile. "I wish I can keep you here." She said pushing her head more onto the pillow.

"Sara, you're too tall for the couch," Kyle's voice came from the kitchen doorway making both women turn their heads to him.

Kyle stood at the doorway with a packet of peanuts in his hand while Lindsey was comfortably sitting on the kitchen counter visible to them.

"You'll see how it feels like to be tall very soon," Sara scowled at Kyle who grinned throwing a peanut in his mouth.

"Why don't you guys watch some TV or play some games?" Catherine said standing up from the couch making Sara give her a curious look. "I'm going to help Sara to get some sleep."

Kyle and Lindsey exchanged a coy look while Sara took Catherine's hands, helping her get up on her feet. Catherine entwined their fingers together as she helped the brunette head to the room while the two children watched them cautiously.

"They're going to think we're going to have sex aren't they?" Sara whispered curiously to Catherine at which the blonde chuckled.

"Yes they are. No need to correct them or else they'll interrupt," Catherine nudged the brunette making her laugh slightly.

Both of them stepped into Sara's room. Sara hurried to her bed while Catherine closed the door softly and locked it. She watched while Sara snuggled into her bed, her face buried deep in the pillow. She looked like a little girl after a long day of school. Catherine's head tilted to the side as she watched Sara relive an aspect of her childhood. She couldn't help but wonder what could have happened in Sara's childhood to have robbed away such precious moment from the younger woman.

As if Sara felt Catherine looking at her, the brunette lifted her head and rolled onto her back. She raised her eyebrows curiously at the blonde who with a smile sat down at the foot of the bed and crossed her legs comfortably.

"Look you don't have to tell me anything if you don't want to," Catherine gulped down a lump as the words escaped her lips. "But I think this is something we can't overlook that it is not something small. And perhaps if you tell me, it would be good for both you and me."

Sara looked straight into Catherine's eyes before looking down at her entwined fingers. Her palms were sweaty, her heart rate fastened and the lump in her throat grew with every passing second. The flashbacks swarming in her mind broke sweat from her forehead making her body visibly shake.

"Look at me," Sara heard Catherine say softly. She looked up, matching the care filled eyes in front of her.

Sara felt calmer, secure by just seeing that look. She felt Catherine take her hand, automatically making her grab onto the blonde's hand tightly.

"It's alright, you don't have to tell me," Catherine said genuinely.

But Sara wanted to tell her. She didn't want to hide anything from a woman she deeply cared for and who cared for her deeply as well. She shook her head at Catherine who leaned closer to her, squeezing her hands.

And then Sara started talking. She kept her eyes closed as her mind played every dark scene, every hurtful beating, and every painful detail of her childhood. She felt Catherine's grip on her hands tighten as her story progressed from her father's abuse to her mother's schizophrenia to her brother's death. She didn't realize that tears were rolling down her cheeks as she remembered her brother's funeral after which her life had no light whatsoever.

"…it was two months after the funeral," Sara sighed heavily. "My mother lost her mind, stabbed my father and was arrested. I was put into foster care."

Sara paused, trying to get herself to calm down. Catherine opened her mouth to say something but all she saw was Sara's flushed face, wet cheeks and shaking body. She didn't know what to say to make her feel any better. And before she could say anything, Sara spoke again.

"That was another piece of hell," Sara opened her eyes and chuckled sarcastically.

Catherine knew foster care was not the best place for a child, she had seen it upfront at work almost every day. But she didn't expect people to be that cruel either, not towards children. The anger in her grew as Sara went on with the story. Finally Sara stopped at the home invasion again. She took in a deep breath with her eyes still closed. All Catherine could do was process all the information she had just heard.

Both women sat in silence, their fingers laced with each other's, looking down at the bed, unable to find words for the situation. The only sounds in the room were the rapid breathing coming from both women, the soft sniffs of Sara and the clock ticking on the nightstand.

"So…" Sara finally said in a croaky voice. She looked up to match Catherine's eyes which were red as hers. "You have nothing to worry about me seeing you any differently. I know how it feels like and I know how much it hurts to be all alone at times like that. So I don't want you to look away from me and deal with this on your own. I want to help." Her words were soft, her tone was pleading.

Catherine didn't know what to say. When she looked at Sara, she couldn't help but wonder how such a wonderful person had to go through that much hardship since she was a child. A tear rolled down her cheek as she realized just how much she wanted to be with Sara, to help her, to never leave her alone, to keep her safe.

"I'm so sorry," Catherine tilted her head at which Sara smiled confusedly.

"You don't have to be sorry," Sara shook her head. "It is not your fault that some people in this world are not meant to be in this world."

"I'm sorry for pushing you away," Catherine said. She saw Sara open her mouth to say something but she cut the brunette short. "Even if it wasn't for long. I shouldn't have done that."

"It's okay," Sara said genuinely, squeezing Catherine's hands.

"I forgot everything after that happened," Catherine shook her head and broke eye contact with Sara. "I forgot what you meant to me, that you have been through the same thing. I'm sorry."

Without saying anything, Sara leaned forward and kissed Catherine softly. But without lingering, she sat back down, leaving Catherine smiling.

"Okay I'll stop talking then," Catherine grinned sheepishly.

"No, please talk but don't apologize. Because I understand what it feels like to be in your shoes," Sara shrugged.

Just then, a sharp pain ran down her left side, down to her leg making her wince. She was hoping that Catherine didn't notice it but with the curious look in Catherine's eyes, she knew that the CSI didn't miss it.

"You should rest," Sure enough, Catherine said softly.

"I think I have rested enough," Sara tried to argue against herself.

"No you haven't," Catherine slid to the empty side of the bed and pulled Sara down to her back. "I will be right here, we both could use some rest."

"What about the two outside?" Sara asked snuggling into Catherine's arms, wrapping her arm and leg around the smaller body.

"One is a teenager and the other is a genius," Catherine chuckled. "I think they will be just fine."

With a smile, Sara closed her eyes and sighed heavily as she enjoyed the soothing calmness that came from the soft strokes Catherine had on her hair. All she knew was she felt a whole lot lighter to be in Catherine's arms and as she dozed off, the only thoughts that conquered her mind were of the blonde.

While Sara slept peacefully, Catherine was having a hard time making herself comfortable in her clothes. After making sure that Sara was fast asleep, she slowly got out of the bed and opened Sara's closet to try and find something more comfortable to wear. She found a tank top yet it seemed as if Sara hid all her shorts very well. Smiling at the thought, Catherine opened the first drawer to find one of her favorite books lying in there. Excited, she took the book and opened it only to have a piece of paper fall out of it. Maybe it was the CSI in her or maybe it was the woman in her that made her open the folded piece of paper and read its content.

Warmth filled her heart as she read Lily's last words to Sara. Tears formed in her eyes with the words filled with so much. When she finished reading the letter, she turned to the bed to see Sara still sleeping peacefully while hugging the pillow nearby. She carefully slid the letter back into the book and closed the drawer before sitting down on the bed.

She kissed Sara's temple softly and kept running her hand over the brunette's hair. She couldn't help but like this woman more and more with every passing day. She had so many layers to her yet with every layer, the beauty of her got exposed to Catherine. In such few days, Catherine had developed a feeling towards Sara that she never thought she would feel again. She didn't want to act on the feeling, not just yet. Yet she knew she wanted to be in Sara's life as long as she could. With that, she laid back down and pulled Sara into her arms before closing her eyes, dozing into a peaceful sleep herself.

While Sara and Catherine finally got some sleep, Kyle and Lindsey were playing Scrabble in the living room. Lindsey stared at Kyle since he was taking ages to play his turn which was puzzling since the boy had been beating her in the game until now.

"You know, this is not a chess game," Lindsey joked making Kyle match her eyes. She sat up straight when she saw his bloodshot eyes. "What's wrong?" She said hurrying to his side on the couch.

"Nothing," He wiped the tear using the back of his hand.

"Come on," Lindsey tugged on the boy's shoulder. "Tell me."

She waited for Kyle to get a hold on his words. His hands were entwined together, squeezing them hard. His body was rocking back and forth as he sniffed softly. Lindsey was at loss for words.

"I miss mom," He said with a soft sob. Lindsey felt bad for the boy as she kept her arms around his shoulder. "I don't want to be here. I want everything as it was. I don't like things to change." He sounded like a scared little boy.

"Hey, it's going to be okay," Lindsey said softly, not knowing what else to say. "Change is hard but once you get used to it, it becomes okay."

"It won't," Kyle shook his head stubbornly, resting his head on Lindsey's shoulder. "Mom is not here anymore and dad just gave me away."

"He didn't have a choice sweetie," Lindsey tried to reason with Kyle. "And he didn't send you with just anyone. Sara is your real mom, she is going to love you so much, you know that right?"

"But it is not the same," Kyle lifted his head, tears now falling down his face with no stopping. "I have tried to tell myself that she is the one who made me, she is my origin but to me my mother will always be my mom."

"I understand," Lindsey put a hand on Kyle's cheek, wiping the tears using her thumb. "But things don't always stay the same. That isn't the way life works."

"I don't like it," Kyle mumbled stubbornly. "I don't like Vegas, I don't like having to change schools, I don't like not living in my house, I don't like any of this."

"I know, I know," Lindsey rubbed Kyle's back firmly. "But sweetheart, with bad comes with good too. You have Sara, you have my mom. You don't know yet how many good friends you are going to make at school. You don't know what adventures wait for you in Vegas. You don't even know how much of a blessing you are in my life." Lindsey paused.

"I didn't mean that I don't like you guys," Kyle said after giving Lindsey an apologetic look. "I just don't understand why things have to change."

"Well as they say, we have to play by life's rules and not the other way around," Lindsey shrugged. "But we find people in life that helps us go through these changes, hardships and everything. The way you have me." She smiled at Kyle who wiped his face, not looking away from her. "I'm here if you need anything. Trust me I know how you feel right now. I know how alone and how betrayed you feel. But it will go away slowly. You will find ways to cope with it. And I will help you get there, okay?"

Kyle nodded sheepishly and wiped his face again, this time with his t-shirt.

"And don't worry, I'm sure your dad will come visit you or Sara will take you to him," Lindsey tugged on the little boy again who gave her an appreciating smile. "So if you need anything, you know who to come to right?"

"Right," Kyle finally managed to smile.

"You know you are like the little brother I never had," Lindsey grinned and pulled him into her arms making Kyle feel more secure than he had felt in a long time.

"Thanks," Those were the only words he could muster up at the moment.

Lindsey turned her head to see Kyle's tiles which spelt "Mother", understanding fully why the little boy broke down.

"It's going to be okay," Lindsey said kissing the top of his head. "Let's watch some movie yeah?" She asked Kyle who nodded onto her chest.

* * *

When Catherine woke up, the sun had gone down. She looked to her side to find Sara still sleeping soundly. Making sure not to wake her up, she slid out of the bed and hurried out to see where Kyle and Lindsey were. To her surprise, both of them were engrossed in the movie Wall-E with an opened pizza box on the coffee table.

"Who got you guys pizza?" Catherine asked rubbing her eyes.

"I did," Lindsey said simply while Kyle waved a hand at Catherine without taking his eyes off of the television which made Catherine laugh.

"Where did you get the money?" The blonde asked grabbing a slice for herself and sitting down next to Lindsey.

"I took from your purse," Lindsey gave a sheepish grin at which Catherine gave a mock glare. "We were hungry and there was nothing here to eat." She said defending herself.

"It's okay," Catherine patted on Lindsey's thigh and turned to the television to enjoy the movie as well.

Just as the movie was ending, there was a sound of door closing and Sara appeared from the bedroom, with squinted eyes, roughed up hair and holding her side as she tried not to limp.

"What time is it?" She asked in a croaky voice making Catherine smile with awe.

"It's almost 8," Catherine informed which made Sara's eyes grow wide.

"I have been sleeping for that long?" She asked in a disbelieving tone. "Why didn't you wake me up?"

"Because you needed both the sleep and the rest," Catherine said simply and got up from the couch to let Sara sit. "How do you feel?"

"The effects of the pills wore off so I feel sore all over," Sara said miserably at which Kyle awed. "How are you doing kiddo?" She asked Kyle who looked at Lindsey before looking back at Sara.

"I'm better," He said frankly making Sara smile.

"What do you want to eat?" Catherine asked sitting on the armrest of the chair and straightening Sara's hair at the same time.

"Chinese," Sara said instantly at which Catherine rolled her eyes.

"Is that all you eat?" Catherine slapped the brunette's shoulder softly.

"What do mean all I eat?" Sara gave her a confused look.

"There were Chinese takeaway boxes in your fridge which I threw out because they did not look edible," Catherine explained. "And there were some more in the garbage as well."

"Hey I only got the ones in the fridge 4 days ago," Sara defended herself.

"You know what? Forget that I asked what you want. You are going to eat what I cook for you without any complaints," Catherine patted Sara's head and headed into the kitchen leaving Sara dumbfounded.

"Now you know how we feel," Lindsey patted on Sara's thigh and turned back to the movie which was almost over.

"Not cool," Sara mumbled and put her feet on the coffee table, engrossing herself in the television with the children.

Catherine didn't take too long to make everyone dinner. The four of them sat down at the table and had dinner together, with Sara feeling a bit overwhelmed with the feeling of having a family to share meals with. She looked at Kyle who kept pushing the broccoli onto Lindsey's plate without her noticing. Catherine was listening to Lindsey try to explain that her boyfriend Kyle was actually a very nice boy.

"Your boyfriend's name is Kyle?" Kyle asked choking on his rice at which Lindsey nodded coyly. "That is so weird."

"Kyle is a very common name dude," Lindsey patted on the boy's back before turning to Catherine again. "Seriously mom, he's not so bad. He gets good grades, he's a passionate guy. He just likes his girlfriends a bit aggressively."

"Sweetheart, you are not making a good case for Kyle," Catherine exchanged a coy look with Sara.

"Oh come on, like you guys haven't been with rough girlfriends and boyfriends in your case mom," Lindsey pouted while chewing on a piece of carrot.

"Your mom is saying that because we know how the rough ones are like," Sara shrugged comfortably at which Catherine scowled.

"You have to admit, they make life a lot more interesting," Lindsey winked at which Catherine slapped her forehead and shook her head.

"I'm so glad I don't know what on earth you guys are talking about," Kyle grinned mischievously as he chewed.

"Just give him a chance mom," Lindsey said in a simple manner. "It's not like I'm going to settle down with him. So chill."

"Chill…right," Catherine nodded at her food.

"I won't do anything stupid, trust me on that okay?" Lindsey said clearing her plate and heading to the sink.

While Catherine's mind was on overdrive, Sara took the blonde's hand from under the table and squeezed it gently.

"Trust her, after all she is your daughter," She smiled. "If anything happens, I'll be right here with you. Don't worry too much."

Catherine smiled not just at Sara but at the warmth she felt with her words. She leaned forward and claimed the younger woman's lips to her.

"Awe how cute," Kyle's voice made both women move away.

"Eat you little rascal," Sara pointed her folk at the boy with a chuckle.

Catherine grinned heartily and thought to herself, _things are going to be fine as long as she's around. _

* * *

_**Thanks for reading...drop in a review :)**  
_


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

**Hello again. It has been, I guess years, a huge sorry for the long absence but I'll spare you with the 'why'. **

**I got several requests to add onto this story and I really don't like to leave things unfinished. So here I am. I haven't written anything in a while so I hope you can bear with me while I get back into shape. **

**There are lots of repetitive thoughts in this chapter and a lot of narratives but it needs to be there, you will know why in the next chapter. Please do excuse sloppy grammatical errors that you might find, I tried to catch all of it and keep the flow nicely. I hope you guys like it. And thank you very much for the reviews, even after I left the story untouched for so long. It was nice to come back to see all of it. Thanks. **

**Disclaimer: Same as Chapter 1...Enjoy**

* * *

"I really can't do this," Sara mumbled to herself for the umpteenth time. "I really really can't do this can I?"

She was sitting outside her balcony, staring at the rain clouds gathering over Vegas in that particular evening. Her mind was running back and forth wondering how to make herself see a better perspective of things than what she was seeing right now.

It was a month after the incident had happened with Alan, who was now safely behind bars. Neither Sara nor Catherine had ever talked about it after that and neither of them were thinking of doing so in any near future.

Life went on. Not smoothly, but it went on.

As she planned, Sara started to look for a better place for her and Kyle to live in and to date, even with Catherine and Nancy's help, Sara has been unable to find a place that was up to her standards. Maybe she was being too specific or stubborn but she didn't want to regret a choice as big as getting a house. It's not as if she didn't have enough regrets already. Her body hadn't completely healed, especially her spine which had forced her to go for physiotherapy every single evening. While trying to get used to a weaker body, she was also having a hard time fitting into the new role of a mother to Kyle.

Catherine was slowly getting used to living in her own house even though the sight of her bed was nauseating her every time she saw it. And since she was already getting a new dressing table thanks to Sara's super human strength, she decided to redecorate her whole room at one shot. And that escalated to her redecorating the whole house including Lindsey's room, which the teenager did not appreciate until she was told that she had all the say when it came to her room. While her nights were occupied with work, her home project kept Catherine's days busy, keeping her mind a lot at ease.

Kyle was slowly getting used to his new environment although his complains of being home sick was only known to Lindsey. No matter how close he felt with Sara, he couldn't help but miss his mother. With that, he was also having a hard time trying not to blame Sara a little bit for not being able to take him to see his father as well. But he never mentioned it to anyone, not even to Lindsey. He kept most of his problems to himself and focused on his studies which were a lot tougher than what he had to deal with in San Francisco. Strangely, the education system of Vegas was well planned out, who knew?

Lindsey was feeling as rebellious as she was. Although she did have a little brother to whom she can come and talk to, or as she puts it, bitch about her life. She had grown to love Kyle, his needs becoming a major priority in her life. If she went to the mall, she made sure that she took Kyle with her if he wanted to just so that the boy can visit the Arcade Game Station. Both kids get to hang out with each other every night when Sara drops Kyle off at Catherine's before they both goes to work. With the new security system and Catherine's mother who had moved into the house temporarily for their safety (as according to Catherine's mother), both women felt a lot at ease during work knowing that both the kids were together.

Both women were still together, enjoying the interactions between the two children in front of them. They had made their children the focus point of their relationship. And as days passed, both of them in their own minds, could see what a huge mistake that had been.

Ever since Catherine moved back onto her own house, which was 2 days after Sara was discharged from the hospital, neither of them had been the same towards each other. And to their glee, neither of them could find the courage to talk to each other about it. And unknowingly, it was creating a rift between both women. Maybe they did not want to see it or they were too occupied with their own thoughts to actually realize it, but the rift was there.

Catherine was still having a hard time recovering from what she had gone through with Alan. Not only because it was physically and mentally tormenting for her, but because she was felt the enormous guilt of putting not only her own family but Sara and her son at risk as well. She couldn't help but be ashamed of how she let a man connected to her bring so much harm to people who were so close to her, and make her feel so helpless to a point where she cried to sleep every day. And she couldn't talk to Sara about it, no. Not after everything the brunette had been through all her life. When she saw Sara, she felt at shame and if it was even possible, a lot guiltier. How could Sara be so strong to overcome all that and still be such a wonderful person? Why is she having such a hard time to get over this and move on when she had such a woman by her side?

While Catherine was boxing herself in her own thoughts, with her spending a lot of time at home rather than at work, Sara's mind was always at work too; from thoughts of Lily to Catherine, and how much they were alike, leading to a growing fear in her that kept telling her that all she was feeling for Catherine was only due to the fact that she reminded her of Lily. If that was the case, who was to say that Sara was moving on from her past rather than holding onto a fantasy she seeks.

And she didn't know how to understand her own thoughts to move on from this fear. Or maybe she didn't want to. She couldn't help but think that maybe her friends were right, maybe this relationship was just a rebound for her, she just got tangled in all the emotions she was feeling in a tight situation. Why didn't she just listen to them and slow down? How can she tell Catherine all of this without hurting her feelings and possibly ruining everything between the both of them? What would happen to Kyle?

"Ugh," Sara groaned throwing a fist in the air.

She got up from the chair and headed inside, still limping slightly whenever she put her weight on her left side. She could never forget or forgive Alan for the scars he had left in all of their lives especially Catherine's, but what he had done to her body was like a daily reminder. Her strength was something she was actually proud of and now she didn't even have that.

She grabbed a beer from the fridge and carefully sat down on the couch. She sighed heavily wondering what to do for the rest of the evening or night. She had the night off, Kyle was still at Catherine's place visiting with Lindsey and she had no idea where Catherine was at the moment. Was it weird that these days, she had absolutely no clue as to where her girlfriend was most of the time?

"Duh," Sara sipped her beer angrily. "Relationships should come with a confirmation question. Before you say yes, someone should come and say, 'are you sure?' That would really help," She kept talking to herself hoping it would make things slightly better. "Why the hell is this so difficult? I don't remember relationships being such a complicated affair."

With another sigh, she closed her eyes and tried to enjoy her beer. Yet her subconscious merged all her thoughts into one making her sit up with anger.

"Great, now I can't even enjoy a beer," Sara cursed and gestured to throw the beer bottle at the adjacent wall. But she resisted herself after remembering that she would have to clean up the mess.

She put the beer down and started to pace up and down the apartment, trying to convince herself that her feelings towards the blonde are as true as it can be. Yet, the annoying little voice in her head would not stop butting in with the images of Lily in her head with every rational thought.

"She makes me feel like I am worthy, that I can give something to someone who actually wants me," Sara rationalized.

"_Yeah coz Lily never made you feel like you were giving her all the happiness she could have when you were with her, please, she was the one who made you first realize that you were worthy of something like that."_ The voice in her head spoke back to her.

"Okay fine, but Catherine is beautiful…before you say anything, I know Lily is beautiful too but Catherine has a different kind of beauty in her,"

"_I'm not even going to dignify that with any energy." _

"You are a bitch and a half, you know that?"

"_I am your own thoughts, so that makes you a bitch too. That's a difference between Lily and Catherine though; Lily was never bitchy about anything or anyone."_

"YES! Catherine is more outspoken, more daring and that is very sexy at times," Sara grinned from ear to ear.

"…_hey I gave you that point, that doesn't count."_

"Look, Catherine is Catherine, she is a wonderful mother, nurturing, so loving and she is totally different. Just because she reminds me of Lily does not mean that I am only falling for the qualities in her that reminds me of Lily right? She has so many other qualities, like she understands everything and anything I tell her about myself."

"_So did Lily,"_

"She is mature and she lets me take care of herself even when she doesn't need to be taken care of,"

"_And Lily never did that?"_

"Her smile, her looks, the way she bites her lips, it all makes me all giddy inside every time I see it,"

"_You basically jumped on Lily anytime she bit her lip, even if she did it accidentally,"_

"Argh, fuck me," Sara groaned helplessly.

"_To be fair, both of them did do that very well," _

"Cath was there for me when I needed someone the most, she took care of me and I know that she always will," Sara continued.

"_And did Lily ever leave you alone throughout your whole relationship with her?"_

"Well, Catherine is ALIVE!"

"…"

"Yes, she is alive. I actually have a chance with her to make a good future, a happy future," Sara breathed heavily. She didn't realize how fast she had been pacing. "I want to make this work and anytime I try it, why the hell do you have to tell me that I am still hung up on someone I can't be with?"

"_Because you are not in love with Catherine, you are in love with Lily," _The voice spoke strongly.

"Yes, I am," Sara admitted. "And I always will be in love with Lily. That does not mean that any other woman who comes into my life is there because I am somehow connecting her to that love. No one can replace the love I have for Lily and Catherine knows that perfectly well."

"_You are not over that love. How can you love someone else when your heart isn't ready to let go of a love you weren't ready to let go of in the first place?"_

"That does not mean that I can't try," Sara stopped pacing. "Yeah, it doesn't," She repeated herself. "If I actually stopped listening to every fucking thought you are putting in my mind, I can close my eyes and see that I can fall in love with this beautiful woman."

"_Right…because you are that strong to overcome all the doubt and paranoia?"_

"No, I'm not that strong," For the first time in weeks, a smile crept over Sara's lips. It was as if an epiphany hit her. "But Catherine does give me that strength. Look at how far we have come in such a short period of time. She helped me get through so many things, she has helped me stay sane when I had to adopt my own child when clearly I am still not ready for it. But she gives me hope and strength that I need to face so many things in life."

"_So did…"_

"Lily did the same yes," Sara cut her own thoughts short. "And she always will. But it's not the same with Catherine. I know that even if we don't work as a couple, which I hope would not happen, she will always be there for me. Even if it was not Lily's fault that she had to leave me, she had to. And I was alone. All alone until Catherine took my hand."

"_So that's it? You are going to go forward in a relationship you are not even sure of?"_

"I doubt any relationship has a 100% guarantee," Sara shrugged and sat down on a chair nearby. "But if I talk to Catherine, I know she will help me see that we can work it out together."

"_You are so dependent on others,"_

"I am, and Catherine knows that," Sara smiled again. "And seeing all the things she has done and said, I think she is fine with it."

"…"

"She's fine with it…" Sara repeated, a wave of relief washing over her. "Wow, how did I not come to this conclusion weeks ago?"

"_Because you are an idiot? And because you are just trying to lie to yourself into thinking that you are not making a huge mistake?"_

"It's all because of you actually, you never let me think that I can let someone else help me," Sara snapped at herself. "But maybe I want to see where this goes, and then we will see if it's a mistake or not."

"_Or maybe you can ask your friends for a change instead of talking to yourself like an insane person. Or are you scared that they would say the same things as me?"_

Sara sighed. It was true to an extent; she did not think she would get much positive thoughts from her friends either. She had avoided calling her friends in San Francisco at any cost. The only person she contacted was George and that was mostly because of Kyle and also because he was practically her brother who has just lost his wife. But how could she complain about her relationship problems when he probably doesn't know how to put his life back together again? She could not be that selfish.

She didn't want to bother her other friends either. Mostly because she knew they would make a big deal out of everything, and also because she did not want to tell them of the horrific tale of Alan which would most probably bring all of them to Vegas with their protective selves. But maybe it was time for her to get someone else's opinion, someone like her sister.

Deciding to call Mia, Sara grabbed her cell phone from her pocket. But before she could dial, her phone rang in her hands making her jolt with surprise.

"Hello?" Sara answered hesitantly.

"Hey," Catherine's soft voice came from the other line.

"Hey, how are you?" Sara asked with a smile.

"I'm okay, are you at home?" Catherine asked softly. It was as if the blonde really did not want to make that call.

"Yeah, what's up?" Sara stood up stretching her sore arm.

"LInds and Kyle wants to go have dinner at that new Indian restaurant near your place," Catherine explained the situation. "Do you want to join us?"

"Of course," Sara headed to the bedroom with the thought of getting ready now itself. "Should I come over so that we can all go together?"

"No, we will pick you up on the way," Catherine offered. "It would be a lot easier, you won't have to make a useless trip that way."

"It won't be useless but okay," Sara frowned slightly.

"Okay, see you in like 20 minutes then?" Catherine asked.

"Sounds good, I'll see you then," Sara smiled at the thought of seeing the blonde. See, they weren't just empty feelings.

"See you," With that, the line got cut.

"Wow, she is in a bad mood," Sara said to the phone before throwing it on her bed and heading into the bathroom.

While Sara got ready, Catherine sat on her bed with her head filled with thoughts. She hadn't seen Sara for a few days, mostly because she had been busy and also because she was avoiding the younger woman.

And she didn't think it mattered considering Sara didn't complain or called to meet up either. Maybe Sara was having the same thoughts as her or maybe worse. Maybe the brunette finally realized that Catherine was a bad choice. Maybe she actually saw how Catherine had endangered all their lives, leading not only to her almost losing her son but also leaving her physically ill. It didn't help that they hadn't been physical ever since the incident with Alan took place.

It was not because she didn't want to, it was mostly because Catherine still felt disgusted with herself to let anyone even look at her. She hadn't forgotten that Sara said that she didn't see Catherine any differently but she could see the looks she still gets at work not only from her own team but every single person in the lab who knew about the incident. So how could the incident not affect Sara? When she had to be there and see it first hand?

They hadn't been together for even a month when everything happened. Why did they have to go through so much throughout the first few days of their relationship? Was it some sort of test? If so, it was a ridiculous, disgusting one.

Or maybe Sara was right, that maybe they both were caught up with the feeling of being lonely and of being left out. But she also knew that she felt deeply towards the brunette who has been nothing but supportive and protective of her. She saw the care in Sara's eyes towards her, the way Sara touched her was filled with warmth and love. And Catherine reciprocated the same way. She really liked Sara and she was not lying when she said she could really fall in love with the brunette. Yet something was holding her back, and she could not snap out of it to see what it was or how to make it go away.

"Mom? Is Sara okay with going out?" Lindsey's voice came from the other side of the bedroom door.

"Yeah," Catherine's voice sounded a bit croaky which made her clear her throat instantly. "Get ready, I just need to change and then we'll leave."

"Alright," Lindsey called and left her alone.

Catherine got up and took off her clothes, opening her new wardrobe.

Maybe they did rush into everything. Maybe they should have just let the friendship take its course rather than jumping into a relationship. Clearly Sara was not over Lily and Catherine was still not over what has happened between her and Alan. So maybe it was just a desperate attempt to replace two lost loves in both their lives.

But there was something more than just infatuation between them, they did have a connection; that much Catherine was sure of. And the way the younger woman lets her take care of herself made Catherine felt special, every single day; she loved how Sara actually showed her dependency on her, even though it's not so often. Yet why is it becoming so hard for Catherine to just forget everything and see what Sara was offering her?

A beautiful, intelligent woman who shares so many feelings with her.

The chance to be happy again with a person who knew so well to make her smile with even the simplest things.

A wonderful family that she can see a long lasting future with.

Amazing sex.

Yet there was something, something was wrong. But what?

Brushing the thoughts away from her mind, Catherine grabbed the first thing that caught her eye and closed the wardrobe with a loud thud.

"I must be going insane," Catherine mumbled and headed into the bathroom.

* * *

Sara was sitting on the couch of Catherine's living room while Catherine put both Lindsey and Kyle to bed. The boy had been adamant on sleeping over at Catherine's place after dinner since Sara didn't have to go to work, she decided to stay with them at Catherine's house that night.

Sara was resting her legs on the coffee table with her eyes closed when she felt Catherine sit down next to her on the couch. She sat up straight and gave the blonde a smile who returned a half hearted smile and turned on the television.

There was an awkward silence between both of them. If there was a stranger there, they wouldn't guess that they were in a relationship at all.

"How are you?" Sara asked softly, turning her eyes to the television as well.

"I'm okay," Catherine answered shortly. "You?"

"Are you sure?" Sara ignored Catherine's question turning her head to the blonde who was forcing her eyes to stay on the television.

"Yeah," Catherine nodded at the television.

"Cath," Sara turned her body towards the blonde as well. "Something is obviously wrong. I mean look at us."

Catherine's head dropped and she turned off the television with a sigh.

"I think we need to talk," She finally turned to Sara, her eyes filled with sadness.

"_Oh, that doesn't sound good", _Sara's thought, a lump growing in her throat._ "Maybe she isn't ready to give this a chance even if I am. Fuck, this is not good."_

"I don't know what's wrong with me," Catherine spoke slowly. "But, I know that even you can see that nothing is the same anymore. Everything has changed."

"Lindsey and Kyle seems to be doing fine," Sara pointed out the only thing she could think of.

"But we aren't," Catherine argued.

Sara nodded. She did not know what to say. Maybe she should have just talked to Catherine since it looks like the blonde was having the same doubts as she was having.

"I don't know how to move on from everything that has happened," Catherine shrugged breaking eye contact with the brunette.

Sara didn't say anything assuming that she needed to let the blonde say everything that was in her heart first.

"I know that you told me that nothing is different, that you don't see me any differently," Catherine repeated her thoughts to the brunette. "But we have never been the same after that. Sure, we said that we will be there for each other and try but we haven't been able to do that have we?" She looked up at Sara again.

Sara just shook her head. It was not the time for her to speak just yet.

"Right, so what is this now?" Catherine asked softly. "We aren't friends coz there is something more than friendship here. But are we a couple? Or are we, as you mentioned in San Francisco, in a rebound relationship with a set of confused feelings?"

Sara just sat silently, her eyes not leaving the blonde's eyes.

"I have been telling myself to focus on the many things you have made better in my life," Catherine went on explaining herself, her hands entwined with each other. "But I don't know, something is stopping me. And I can't figure out what it is. Or maybe I don't want to, I don't know anymore."

Catherine bit her quivering lips. And even at that situation, Sara found it extremely sexy.

"I can't help but think that we are just using each other to get over some people that meant so much to both of us," Catherine smiled, yet there was so much guilt in that smile. "People that left us abruptly and hurtfully, leaving us with these huge gaps to fill in our lives. And in my case, someone who came back in a way that was horrific for not just me, but all of us." Catherine chuckled sarcastically.

"And that we just happened to get close at a time where we both were confused. And now, we are just lost because that rush of emotions and excitement is gone…or something." Catherine added.

Catherine didn't speak anymore, she just sat quietly fidgeting with her fingers. Sara wasn't sure if the blonde had poured all that was in her heart or maybe she was just finding the right words.

"…I don't think I can go on if I'm just a replacement for Lily," Catherine's voice got croaky. "And I don't want to keep using you as a replacement for someone else either." She didn't have the heart to say his name. "I just don't know…"

The silence came back. And they both welcomed it for a while.

"I know what you mean," Sara finally spoke. "It's not fair for either one of us if this is just a game of replacement."

Catherine looked up to match the deep brown eyes staring back at her.

"So what do we do?"

* * *

**There are two ways I can go from here, either continue or end the story here (in a happier or sad note). I havent decided it yet so let me know what you think. Hope you guys liked it, if you did or did not, a review would help. **

**Thanks for reading, really appreciate it. **


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24**

**Good news is that I'm going to update a lot frequently now. But that's also because I'm going to end this story real soon as well. But I can't end it just like that, its not like they can fall in love in a days time, even if its a story right? So you will still see a couple more chapters for this one for sure. **

**Thanks for the reviews. And (urm, spoiler alert?) don't worry guys, the story is going to have a happy ending. Reality is already too depressing for fiction to be the same as well. **

**Disclaimer: The same as always. No ownership whatsoever other than of my own characters. Enjoy. **

* * *

Neither of them were speaking. They didn't know how long they had been sitting at both ends of the couch, completely silent. Both women were trying to find the answer to the question Sara had just uttered yet no rational thought came into either one's minds.

Sara turned to see Catherine hugging her knees, slightly rocking herself back and forth. She wondered what was going through her head, or whether the blonde had already come to the conclusion that the answer for both of them was to just let each other go. The thought itself wanted Sara to grab Catherine by her shoulder and shake her into saying at least one word.

While Sara stared blankly at Catherine, the older woman was biting her tongue, trying to keep her tears at bay. What was she supposed to do? She didn't know how to ask Sara to take her insecurities away, to ask her to help her see that they were in a relationship that could lead somewhere and that it was not a rebound; because she wasn't really sure if the younger woman thought of their relationship as anything more than that.

"Cath…" Sara's voice broke the silence in the air, yet Catherine didn't turn. "Look, I'll admit, I have asked the same questions myself. Whether we rushed into this and even whether we should keep on with this."

Catherine buried her face between her knees and closed her eyes, her focus only on Sara's voice.

"I am still in love with Lily," The words pierced through Catherine's heart like one enormous dagger. "I am not over that love." She continued making Catherine wish Sara would just stop talking.

"But what I feel for you is for you and only you," Sara sighed heavily. "I know that I'm not trying to replace Lily with you. Frankly, no one can replace her. But you are different. To me you are someone who gives me hope and strength to move on from the biggest loss of my life."

Catherine finally took a breath.

"It's true that we rushed into this relationship. We did get pushed against each other at a time when we both were extremely lonely and confused," Sara went on. But her words didn't feel as harsh to Catherine's heart anymore. "But I do like you, more than a friend, as someone with whom I can share all aspects of my life with and nothing can really change that."

Finally, Catherine lifted her head and turned her head to see Sara looking down at the couch, her hair covering the sides of her face.

"I do understand if you are not sure about this, I am not either," Sara shook her head involuntarily. "But I came here tonight thinking that I want to give us a chance. That we can help each other and make this work, and be happy together. But we both have to feel the same way for that to happen. And I really will understand if you think it won't work coz I don't want to not have you in my life."

Their eyes finally locked and Sara didn't speak anymore. She stared into Catherine's eyes, hoping that she could find all the answers she wanted in the deep eyes looking back at her. But she failed.

"I don't know what to do Cath," Sara admitted helplessly.

Catherine gave the brunette a sympathetic smile. She could see that this was not Sara's strongest area to be in yet she could also see that the younger woman was trying. And maybe that was all she needed; someone who was willing to try to work for not only their own but her happiness as well. If anything, at least Sara was being honest.

"Me either Sara," Catherine spoke, clearing her throat at the same time. "I wish I could tell you that I am not insecure but I am. And I don't like being insecure, it makes me feel like I am someone else."

Sara smiled; Catherine was talking, that was all she needed at the moment.

"Can we come back from this?" Catherine asked sounding like a confused child.

Sara took a moment before she answered. "Why not? We know there is something wrong, we sort of know what it is, so I don't see a reason why we can't try. I mean, we crack harder cases than this at work, don't we?" She shrugged.

"It's not the same as figuring out how and why someone got butchered in half Sar," Catherine frowned sarcastically.

"But that takes mad skills too," Sara said, a hint of pride in her voice. "I just don't want to throw this away so easily with the first hesitance that hits us. That's really cowardly."

"I get it, I really do Sara but I'm just scared," Catherine admitted.

"Well maybe we both are scared because what we both feel is actually real," Sara wondered out loud. "Maybe somewhere in us we both know that this could lead somewhere, and our hearts are getting timid because of the loss in our past."

Catherine processed Sara's words with both amazement and wonder. A minute earlier Sara looked and sounded as doubtful as her but now that it was her turn to console Catherine, the brunette seemed to be a wizard of words that were making perfect sense.

"So the question is whether we want to give this a chance or whether we break this off just because we aren't really sure of what would happen if we continue," Sara summarized her view. "I think." She added.

"Aren't you scared?" Catherine asked, ignoring Sara's question.

"Of course I am," Sara said with a chuckle. "I am chicken when it comes to relationships. You have seen me, I don't really know how to make someone feel secure with me. It has been only a month since we got together? And I have already made you insecure by making you worry over someone who isn't even alive."

"It's not just you," Catherine cut Sara short. "It's the situation as well. And I'm not jealous of Lily, maybe a little but I don't want to compete over someone who was that special to you. I can never win, and I don't think I want to either. It's just, the pace has made me feel more insecure than anything you have done or haven't done for that matter."

"So what are you saying Cath?" Sara finally asked. "Do you want to give this a chance? To give me a chance?"

"Of course I do," Catherine answered without any hesitance. "But can't I be scared?" She asked timidly.

"You can," Sara pushed herself a bit closer to Catherine, still not touching her. "Tell me, what should I do?"

"What?" Catherine asked, putting her legs down and finally relaxing her body.

"What can I do to make you feel a little less scared?" Sara cleared her question. "You are a wonderful person Cath, you make me feel like I can be there for someone and make her happy. Plus you are wonderful to Kyle. So tell me, what can I do?"

Catherine smiled. She took a good look at Sara, with her hands entwined with each other, her hair messed up for some unknown reason which was covering her slightly flushed cheeks, her innocent eyes and the words escaping from her lips; at that moment she felt relieved to have the younger woman by her side.

"You can tell me everything's going to be fine," Catherine smiled and put her hand on Sara's.

Sara looked at their hands and a wave of relief washed over her. She realized it then; it was true that she hadn't moved on from her past but it was also true that what she had with Catherine was something special.

"Everything's going to be just fine," Sara matched Catherine's eyes, holding Catherine's hand tightly.

Catherine took the bold move and wrapped her arms around Sara's neck, slightly pushing her body on top of Sara who was involuntarily pushed onto her back, forcing her to lean on armrest of the couch. Confused and happily, Sara wrapped her arms around Catherine's body and held the woman close to her while Catherine made her upper body comfortable on top of Sara's.

And again, neither of them spoke. Yet the silence around them wasn't awkward anymore, it was comforting. It made both of them feel like nothing could come between them to interrupt that or any other moment they were to share.

"We can go slow," Catherine mumbled onto Sara's chest.

The brunette knew exactly what that meant, and while a part of her groaned with displeasure, the other part couldn't agree with Catherine more.

"We can get to know each other first then," Sara suggested. "I don't even know your favorite color yet."

Catherine chuckled and lifted her head, resting her chin on Sara's chest. "Blue."

"One down, hundreds more to go," Sara chuckled and rubbed Catherine's back gently making the blonde lay her head back on her chest.

"This could work fine," Sara hummed under breath, closing her eyes. "Right?" She added.

"Yeah," Catherine said in a soft whisper.

Both women laid comfortably in each other arms until Catherine's phone went off. With a groan, Catherine sat up and grabbed her phone from the table to put it right back on it and dropping back on Sara's chest.

"Who was it?" Sara asked curiously.

"My alarm," Catherine mumbled, her face buried on Sara's chest.

"Ah, I forgot you have work," Sara ran her fingers through the blonde's hair.

"I'm so worn out," Catherine lifted her head with a puppy look in her eyes.

"You didn't sleep today?" Sara asked, tilting her head sympathetically.

"I didn't have time," Catherine shrugged running a finger over Sara's collarbone. "I wanted to finish painting the guest room today."

Sara smiled and took a look around the living room. Catherine's home project hadn't quite reached the living room yet but she did notice several brush strokes on nearby walls where the blonde had clearly tested the color of choice.

"I would have to say, that was a bad idea," Sara stated the obvious making Catherine slap her on the arm. "I'm just saying." She chuckled.

"Thank you Captain Obvious," Catherine scowled and lifted herself up, stretching her back. "But I do have to get ready, do you want to go to bed now?" She asked getting up from the couch.

"I probably should," Sara nodded and followed Catherine's suit.

Both women headed upstairs to Catherine's room and as soon as the blonde opened the door, Sara stopped at her tracks. Catherine's room was completely different, starting from the color to the arrangement of the furniture. All of the furniture was new and black in color while the color of the walls were of a beautiful yellow instead of the soft purple it was before. The room did look very elegant and Sara really liked Catherine's choice of furniture style.

"Are you just going to stay there?" Catherine called from inside the room.

"You changed everything huh?" Sara stated the obvious again as she entered the room.

"It was really needed," Catherine smiled opening her wardrobe.

"It looks a lot better," Sara nodded, putting her hands in her pocket. "Not that it wasn't nice before, this is…better."

Catherine chuckled and took out her outfit for the night before stepping in front of Sara. "Thank you," She whispered and placed a soft kiss on Sara's lips. To Sara's surprise, Catherine lingered, wrapping her arms around her neck.

"You can kiss me back you know," Catherine whispered onto Sara's lips.

"I thought we were going slow," Sara whispered back, touching Catherine's face with one hand while she put her other hand on the blonde's waist.

"We can just kiss…" Catherine ran her tongue over her own lip caressing Sara's in the process. "Right?" She hummed softly.

Without answering her, Sara pushed hers against the blonde's parted lips, kissing her soft yet passionately. Sara's body was telling her to deepen the kiss, to give into her needs but she resisted. She felt Catherine's hands run down to her shoulder down to her chest as if to push her away. Taking it as a sign, Sara moved to break the kiss but Catherine gripped the collar of her shirt keeping their lips locked with each other's. With a tiny smile on her lips, Sara relaxed and kissed her girlfriend deeply until Catherine finally broke the kiss. Yet, the blonde kept their lips slightly touching, as if to tease Sara a bit more.

"I have missed that," Catherine placed a peck on Sara's lip again.

"Yeah, me too," Sara ran her finger down Catherine's cheek. "I didn't want to impose."

"For future reference, you can kiss me anytime and it would only be a pleasure," Catherine spoke, her lips caressing Sara's as she did so.

"You really should go get ready," Sara grinned happily.

Catherine smiled and stepped behind only to be pushed forward and into Sara's arms again. Their lips crashed against each other, their hands caressing each other softly sending chills up both their spines. Catherine really didn't feel like pulling away, yet knowing the fact that she had to be at work on time for a change, she pulled away with a groan.

"I have to get ready," Catherine repeated Sara's words. "You are a bad influence." She added.

"Hey I'm always on time for work," Sara stated proudly, brushing their noses against each other.

"Funny," Catherine smiled and put their faces close together again. But instead of kissing her lover, she softly bit Sara's lower lip and pushed her away playfully. "I hope this leads you to sweet dreams." She smiled cheekily and stopped at the bathroom door, taking her top off and throwing it on the floor.

All Sara could see was Catherine bare back before she disappeared into the bathroom. Even with her healing scars, Sara could only focus on how beautiful the blonde was. With a soft sigh, she sat down on the bed and wiped her face.

With a huge grin, she dropped onto her back and closed her eyes knowing that she would finally be able to sleep without a problem after a long time.

* * *

Catherine sat at her desk going through the paperwork from the previous shift before Grissom walked in and assigned her any case. But mostly, she was avoiding being around the lab where everyone was still treating her like a fragile doll made of glass. As she stared blankly at the Coroner's Report of her last case, her mind wandered to the earlier happenings of the night.

"Hey there," Warrick's low voice boomed in her ears.

"Warrick, what are you doing here?" She smiled, taking her glasses off to welcome her friend.

"Not happy to see me?" He flashed his charming smile making her smile.

"_At least one person is acting normal, thank God,"_ She thought before she spoke. "Of course I am. I was just wondering why you weren't in the field. It's not like you to wander in the lab."

"I was just about to head off before I saw you in here," He sat down across the table and relaxed. "How's everything going?"

"Good, good," She kept it short.

"How's Sara?" He asked with a wicked smile.

"She's fine too," She answered, with a smile this time. "She's at my place, babysitting."

"You guys are living together now?" His voice was filled with curiosity and mischief.

"No," She scowled, the smile still playing at her lips. Maybe she liked that idea, but she pushed it to the back of her mind. "I told you, she's babysitting. Decided to give my mother a break for a change."

"I'm sure she would appreciate that," Warrick chuckled.

"She's probably out with her girls drinking their sorrows away," Catherine rolled her eyes and relaxed back in her chair. "How's life Ricky?"

"Can't complain," Warrick nodded appreciatively. "Hey, I've been meaning to talk to you about something," His words made Catherine focus on him clearly. "Do you think it would be a good idea if I asked Tina to move in with me?" He asked timidly.

"Awe Ricky in love," Catherine teased before she got serious. "Why not? You have been with her for quite a while now. It is serious isn't it?"

"Yeah, it is," Warrick started. "And she's a great girl. She…"

As Warrick started to praise his girlfriend, Catherine leaned back, keeping a smile and throwing timely nods at the man in front of her. Yet she wasn't listening to a word he was saying. Her mind was at home with the brunette who was probably sleeping peacefully on her bed right now.

Why the hell was she so paranoid about both of them when at the moment all she could feel was extreme affection towards the woman. Even if she wanted, she wouldn't be able to get Sara off her mind. Now that she had talked to Sara about everything and she had heard everything Sara had said, she was more sure of their relationship than ever. Maybe people were right, sometimes all you need to do is just talk everything out.

"So you think I should go for it?" Warrick's question brought her back to the world again.

"Huh?" Catherine asked involuntarily before shaking her head. "Oh yeah, you should. As long as you are sure of it." She went with the diplomatic answer.

"You didn't hear a word I said did you?" Warrick laughed.

"Why would you say that?" Catherine asked trying to sound offended.

"Because you have that teenage girl grin on your face," Warrick smiled. "Thinking of someone?"

"Maybe," Catherine blushed.

But before she spoke, a knock on the door interrupted them both.

"Urm Miss Willows?" Jerry stood at the door giving her a timid look. "Dr. Grissom asked me to give you this assignment slip. He asked me to assist you tonight."

"Okay," Catherine stood up, grabbing her jacket from the back of her chair. "We'll talk later then?" She turned to Warrick who got up and turned towards the door as well.

"Yeah, we'll talk when you can get your mind off of her," Warrick winked and headed out after giving Jerry a pat on his shoulder.

Catherine chuckled and grabbed the slip from Jerry. "We can take my car," She smiled at the boy who nodded and followed her to their destination.

It didn't take long for them to process their crime scene considering that it was a small motel room with an even smaller bathroom. Catherine was packing up her tools when Jerry walked out of the bathroom with the last of the evidence carefully packed in the bag.

"That's all," He said with a sigh of relief.

"Good, do you want to grab a burger on the way to the lab? I'm starving," Catherine suggested as she stood up.

"Urm yeah, sure," Jerry nodded hesitantly and followed Catherine back to the car.

The boy was completely silent during their car ride, making Catherine bored out of her mind. Deciding to get to know the lifestyle of the new generation, she spoke.

"So how do you like Vegas?" She kept it simple.

"It's okay, but I think I have had enough of it," He sounded down.

"Really? I would imagine that a young boy like you would never want to leave this place," Catherine chuckled heartily.

"Noel doesn't want to leave," Jerry admitted. "But my trip here was for a different reason and now that it's gone, I just want to go back."

"I thought you came here to get experience at the lab," Catherine asked getting curious with the boy's words.

"No," Jerry kept it short.

"So why did you come here?" Catherine pushed even though she could feel that the boy didn't want to indulge the information to her.

"For a girl actually," Jerry shrugged. In his mind, he was telling himself to just stay quiet yet someone inside him, an angry person, was overpowering his own will.

"So what happened with her?" Catherine smiled cheekily turning into the drive through. "One sec, lets order first, what do you want?"

While Catherine ordered, Jerry was trying to talk to himself and trying to calm himself down. But in the presence of Catherine he did not feel like himself anymore. He felt angry. He felt angry at her for taking away the person he left home for. He felt dejected because Sara chose her instead of him. He felt infuriated that Catherine didn't even let him have a chance to tell Sara about his feelings. Even though he knew that Catherine had no idea about his feelings, he felt annoyed at her more than he had felt at anyone else in his entire life. He felt like screaming at her with every word she uttered, no matter how sweet she was towards him. And he had never been that type of person. But she took away Sara Sidle from him; how could he forgive her even if she didn't do it on purpose. He was starting to really hate his male ego for how it was making him act at the moment.

After they ordered, Catherine drove off again, her question still lingering in the air.

"So?" Catherine asked again while she paid for their meal. "What happened?"

"She started dating someone else," Jerry answered, his fingers balled into a fist as he tried to control his tone and anger.

"I'm sorry," Catherine said in a sympathetic tone. "But you're a wonderful boy, I'm sure she will come around to see it if you show her. Does she know that you like her?"

"Love," He stated shortly.

"Excuse me?" Catherine asked, unsure of what the boy was talking about.

"I don't just like her, I love with her," Jerry turned around, his eyes speaking a lot more than he wanted. And it didn't go missed by Catherine.

"Have you told her?" Catherine asked as she drove off, feeling slightly confused as to why the boy was acting strange. He was probably the nicest one from the three boys yet now he looked like he was someone else completely. Or maybe it was her imagination.

"No, but I never got the chance," Jerry spoke, his voice lower than before.

"You should just tell her," Catherine suggested. "You never know what a woman is feeling unless you talk to her." She smile, again her mind stopping at Sara.

"It doesn't matter. She's never going to leave you for me," The words slipped before Jerry could stop himself.

Involuntarily, Catherine hit the gas sending the car forward with a slight jolt. She turned to the boy who slapped his hand on his forward loudly.

"What?" Catherine asked, louder than she had expected.

"Nothing," Jerry shook his head. "Just that she's a lot happier now."

"No no, you are in love with Sara?" Catherine asked, again louder than she wanted. "MY Sara?" The possessiveness surprised even Catherine herself.

Jerry didn't speak. Catherine turned her focus back on the road, throwing sharp looks at the boy, expecting him to answer. But he just kept quiet.

"Jerry?" Catherine urged the boy softly.

"Yeah, I am in love with Sara," He nodded sheepishly.

"And now you are angry at me?" Catherine guessed.

"Well yeah, you took her from me," Jerry spoke in a childish tone.

"I didn't take her from you Jerry, she was never yours to begin with," Catherine tried to keep her voice calm trying to make sure she didn't anger the boy even more.

Surprisingly, she was actually scared of the boy. She was scared of what his male ego might drive him into doing, just like Alan. She didn't like the feeling at all. She had been a lot of things but she had never been weak, especially not in front of men.

"I know that," Jerry snapped making Catherine slow down the pace of the car. "But you never even gave anyone else a chance."

"Trust me, you didn't have a chance," Catherine muttered under her breath thinking of Lily.

"What?" Jerry asked.

"I didn't know about your feelings Jerry," Catherine ignored what she said. "And me and Sara happened very suddenly when neither of us were expecting it to happen."

"See, I know all that but I still feel so…argh," The boy gestured strangling someone with his hands. "It makes my blood boil, you know?"

"Hey I get it," Catherine waved a hand in the air. "She's a terrific person."

"Terrific? No no, she's not just terrific. She's perfect," Jerry laughed sarcastically. "She has the most subtle beauty in her, and her brains make her the most desirable person on earth. And she's so caring, I mean I haven't known her up-close but even when I first met her, she was just amazing."

Catherine just listened as the boy poured his heart out, her own heart rate increasing with his description of her girlfriend.

"She didn't know me when I first met her, it was in Connecticut," His voice sounded dreamy. "She slammed into me and made me fall while she was hurrying out of the seminar hall. I knew she was in a hurry but she stopped and helped me. She asked me numerous questions trying to make sure I was okay when it wasn't even a big deal. She even noticed that my lips were dry and offered me her water telling me that dehydration makes the mind process information slower."

Catherine chuckled silently. That sounded like Sara, going around stating obvious facts all the time.

"I just fell in love with her since then," Jerry sighed. "She was so nice to a complete stranger whom she was never going to see again. I couldn't imagine how she was to someone she actually cared for. And for years, I dreamt of being that person in her life. And now..." He stopped talking.

Catherine bit her lip, a sense of guilt rushing through her heart even though she knew she had done nothing wrong.

"I'm sorry Jerry," Catherine spoke softly. "Look I didn't know about your feelings. But will you believe me if I say that you actually couldn't have become that person in her life? And that it's not because of you either?"

"Hey, I know you guys have been friends since way before. I mean things must have been happening for a while now right? And I get why she went for you, you're a beautiful woman," Jerry waved his hands in the air, defending the situation or maybe his loss, Catherine wasn't really sure. "Any woman or man would be crazy not to be with you. And if she saw even the slightest encouragement for you, why wouldn't she play for the other side. But that doesn't mean a guy won't have the chance with Sara either. I mean why wouldn't we?"

"Because she's not a bisexual like me," Catherine stated the truth. "She's a complete Lesbian. She has probably never dated a guy in her entire life." She made a note to herself to confirm that piece of information with Sara later.

She turned her head to see Jerry look completely beaten.

"She's not bi?" Jerry turned, his face looking like a 10 year old boy.

"No sweetie," Catherine actually felt bad for him.

"Huh," That was all Jerry said.

Catherine didn't know what else to say to him. She probably couldn't say anything that would comfort him. So she just drove in silence.

But everything the boy had said about Sara kept making her heart jump up and down with joy. Such young boy who doesn't even know Sara was madly in love with her. He was someone who only saw just a glimpse of her love and care. And Catherine has gotten to see so much more of that side of hers, and she knew that she would get to see a lot more too.

Unknowingly, Jerry had made Catherine feel so much secure towards her relationship with Sara and she actually wanted to thank him for it, but she controlled herself from making the boy feel even worse. Yet she couldn't help but feel like the luckiest person as the seconds passed. And she couldn't wipe the small smile that had crept up the one side of her lips.

She actually felt smug. Smug to be with someone like Sara.

"I'm sorry," Jerry said softly. "I shouldn't have been angry at you without knowing the situation. It's not like me. I just.."

"Love her," Catherine completed the sentence for him. "I completely understand it Jerry. Don't worry."

Jerry gave her an appreciative smile just as they entered the parking lot of the lab. After asking the boy to log the evidence while she took care of something, Catherine hurried to the locker rooms where she knew she would be alone. She grabbed her phone and dialed Sara, knowing perfectly well that the brunette would probably be still sleeping.

_This is Sara. I'm not around right now, leave me a message and I'll call you back. _

Catherine smiled and cut the line. All she wanted was to hear her voice.

* * *

**Had to take care of Jerry first. And now a few more insecurities to take care of and these two can ride off into the sunset happily ever after. Do drop in a review, it really does motivate a girl to write faster.  
**

**Thanks for reading, appreciate your time. **


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